I tend to hate admitting that I'm vulnerable. Late at night, my nightmares feel like they are too much to bare, voices hound my thoughts, monsters from the dark reach out to me and force me to wake up, sweating violently, I apologize to my future wife. You will have to see me at my weakest moment and I may never forgive myself for that, because one day, you'll realize that it never was any monster chasing me. Just me and only me. I fear you wouldn't be able to accept it or handle it and leave, because you fear the parasite that is my mind and even more so, me. If I can barely handle my own nightmares, what hope do I have that she would be able to with me?
Guess it's another sleepless night, right before I have to work a ten hour shift.