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5 Games To Buy...For Someone You Hate

With the best holidays right around the corner, it only makes sense for everyone to be in the mood for giving. Now sometimes, you want to give someone a foot in the ass, but I'm going to try and promote a more peaceful solution. Buy them a terrible game. What's that you say? What game could be so terrible it would be considered worthy to impart upon someone you hate or someone who needs to be taught a lesson? Well, here are a few... 1. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 5 I cannot stress it enough how terrible this game is. This game just came out recently, and it's already infamous for its terrible gameplay. "A PS4 game that plays like a bad PS1 game." That's the best way to describe Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 5. With grimy graphics, a tedious/repetitive set-up, and physics straight out of the mind of a possessed 4 year old; Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 5 makes me wish we had never strapped on our kneepads and wished for a sequel in the first place. For: Your Friend Who Thinks They're An Athlete. 2. The Walking Dead: Survival Instinct You guys know that successful comicbook series The Walking Dead? Well it did so good, they made it into a television series! And you know what? It's critically acclaimed. So they decided to make a game series, with TellTale at the wheel. And you know what? It was brilliant, one of the best games I've ever played. Then, for some reason, Terminal Reality decided to take a shit on everything The Walking Dead ever made. What's that? You've never heard of Terminal Reality? Why they've been behind such great hits like: Hellbender, Monster Truck Madness (Both 1 AND 2!), The Ghostbusters Video Games, Def Jam Rapstar, and (Wait for it...) Shake It Up: Dance It Up! Wow...with that library of content, it's no wonder they were liquidated.

4 Outdated Things

We as a society have advanced in so many ways in such a short amount of time, really starts to make me feel like an old man, and I JUST hit drinking age. Yet there are still many things we have that just shouldn't be, I mean if these things I'm about to list were buildings, they'd be all dilapidated, abandoned, filled with cobwebs, and little kids would be daring each other to spend the night in them. Disclaimer: There are going to be exceptions to just about every thing I list off on here. You might really enjoy some of these things, but my opinion doesn't have to necessarily reflect yours. So ha. 1. Alternate Endings For the most part, alternate endings are basically if you and the creator of the movie/show/game in question were hanging from the monkey bars on the playground, and the creator said "You know what would be really cool? If this happened instead!" Very rarely is the alternate ending anything all that comprehensive, typically a 2 minute buffer thrown on the bonus features of a DVD (another dead object, but we'll ignore that for today), you want to add that to an already complete movie? Fine. But don't you DARE try to advertise an alternate ending like it's going to be groundbreaking when more often than not it's just a predictable tweaked perspective of the original ending. Not to mention the fact that the alternate ending is just that, an alternate. It is not the canonical ending we view in theaters, on television, etcetera, it's an extra feature to add some icing to the cake. Stop kidding yourselves and pretending like we actually care about this. We don't. 2. Pre-Order Bonuses I can't remember when this started, but I swear to god if I could I would end the life of the person responsible for the idea. I was probably 9 when I saw the first Gamestop commercial: "Pre-order at Gamestop and get the cool-looking gun you'll out grow by the time you reach level 5." I thought it was cool. I was dumb. Don't get me wrong, sometimes (VERY rarely) pre-order bonuses can be really cool. Like Fallout 4's Pipboy for instance, or when the games come with a statue or something (if that's your interest). But the bulk of pre-orders offer you a weapons pack that will outlive its usefulness fairly quickly, a map pack you wouldn't have noticed you didn't have anyway, or (and this is the worst of all) a way to cut corners and cheat in the video game. Pre-order and get an extra 10 attribute points to use on your character. Then you get turf wars, like when Best Buy offers a specific fighting pack for Chuck Green in Dead Rising 2, but Gamestop is offering a different one, not to mention Amazon has one also. What to do, what to do? No worries, it'll all be DLC eventually. Which reminds me...

8 Ways To Be A Better Person

So I woke up this morning and said "It's time for more articles!" But where to begin? What ground to cover next? Then I thought of something from my past, well a lot of things really, and it made me think about myself and those around me. The same thought that always comes into my head was knocking on my door: We could all stand to be a lot better, to each other and to ourselves. So here are some ideas on how to be a better person. 1. Smile More By now you should notice that my lists seem to combine obvious and not-so-obvious points, usually explained in different perceptions. Here's some of the former. You should smile more often. There have been numerous studies stating that simply smiling has a number of effects on us. It boosts creativity, retrains your brain to produce positive thoughts (versus our brains' inherent production of negative ones), reduces stress, and can literally make you a happier person. Not to mention smiles are contagious, so it's a win-win. 2. Check On Those Around You I can't tell you how many times I've been going through a rough patch in my life, and have felt just a tiny bit better when someone has asked me how I'm doing. More often than not I'm too proud to legitimately open up, but just the basic fact that a fellow human being is checking up on you seems to boost one's spirits. Say you ask 5 people a day how they're doing, and say only 1 of those people genuinely opens up to you. Well that's 4 people you perked up, and 1 person you might have helped do a complete turn-around in their mood. What's it going to cost you? Only a few minutes of your time. 3. Drink More Water

Exiled

1. Anne, Before I go right into what I’m about to say, I want to start by reminding you that I don’t just jump from decision to decision, I think things through. Anyway, I’m just going to come out and say it, I’m not so sure the UFH is for me. I know, I know, you’re really disappointed. This is what I’ve been talking about since we were kids, joining the UFH, serving in the corps of the elite, making a difference for all of us on the Heracles, all of that other crap I used to say. I don’t mean for it to sound like that, well I mean technically it doesn’t sound like anything because I’m writing this and I’m rambling on and on even on paper I have this problem so I’m just going to put a period and end this sentence so I can move on to my explanation. They’re not what I thought they were Anne, they don’t follow any of those damned values posted all over the sector walls, and they’re just stupid. They are inefficient, how they do things, how we do things, it’s just not the right way to go about it. I don’t want to start another rambling fit, so I’m just going to sum it up with this: This is NOT the way to live the lives we talked about. I can’t keep doing this Anne, I can’t keep wasting my time here. I need to do something else. Maybe the Harbingers have a point with their beliefs. Maybe— I put my pen down as someone comes into my room, the lack of a knock means one of two things: This is urgent, or it’s about to be. The words that come next are enough to keep me in a good temper. “Fair, sector 11, point 4B, stat.” With that he was out of the door and I was grabbing my helmet following out seconds after. I stepped off the pad onto the trans hall and was on my way to sector 11. On the way I couldn’t help but let my mind wander. What could they be sending me to? Lately it’s been nothing but false alerts or domestic disputes. I look out the glass as the hall continues to propel me where I need to be, at the miraculous city that is Heracles. Riddled with crime, drugs, murder, how did it even come to this? We were all promised a fresh start, refuge, peace. Then soon the first assault occurred, then the first murder, it wasn’t long before the UFH was founded thereafter. They stood for something, something everyone believed in, something I believed in. I was willing to bet my future on this. Maybe they did mean all they said back then, maybe in some twisted way they still do, but the ends do not justify the means damn it. They just don’t. I refuse to believe that turning a blind eye to the helpless is the necessary choice to the future safety of the world around us. I don’t buy it. They say everything has to be followed by the book, ‘Only cases brought via the coordinator are to be followed up on.’ What about the mugging happening down the street? The murder in the supposed safety of a person’s home? If the coordinator doesn’t add that to the case files in time, what then? What about first response? Why doesn’t that exist? Too many questions, and the only answer I get is ‘This is the way it has to be.’ Wrong. Just wrong. Just… “Wrong.” I utter the unfinished thought aloud to the perplexity of the woman to my left as I see what I can only assume I’ve been called out for. Five of my fellow guardians pinned at the entrance of an alleyway, kept out by one girl. She looked about 20, and she looked like she wasn’t a resident of this sector, but mostly she just looked scared. I wasn’t entirely sure how she was keeping all those armed soldiers out of the alleyway until I saw her lob a bomb over in their direction. The radius alone was close enough to catch them if they weren’t kept safe behind the entrance walls, they then poked their heads out from behind the wall and lay down some cover fire. I guess they want to keep her in the trap she set. I wasn’t sure how many of those bombs she had, but I knew that I had to hurry. I stop the hall as I drop down to point 4B and stand across the street from the others. It would be just stupid to go line up with the rest of them and hope that we outlast her bombardment long enough to avoid a getaway. Or I could be a little more unconventional. I call the trans hall up again, as the floor rises to bring me into it I grip the opening and hang off of the gap. The pain shot up from my fingertips as the floor meets the gap, or at least tries to, with my hands in between. It’s worth it though as the hall continues down, over buildings, buildings I can use to get to the alley. Article 78-D states that there will be no standing on the top of buildings at any time, doing so would be considered a threat to the foundation of the Heracles, but you have to crack a few eggs sometimes if you want to get that breakfast. I’m not great at analogies. I pull my hands free from the hall and drop below onto the rooftop overlooking the opposite edge of the alleyway. At this point it’d be easy to just swoop down and take her down. That was the plan, that was the plan.

The 8 Different Kinds Of Friends

This one ought to be fun. I know for a fact I won't be catching them all, but that's what extra installments are for! Here are some types of friends I'm sure we can all say we have. (If you have no friends, come back after you've made some). Which ones do you have? Which one are you? Or are you a combination of more than one? Let me know in the comments section 1. The Mile Taker's These are the friends that have to change. They either have to change friend circles, or change their act, because no one likes a Mile Taker for too long. A Mile Taker is a friend that always requires favors. They may range from small to large, but they are constant and (more often than not) you're getting nothing in return. No one can put up with this for too long, or rather, they shouldn't. 2. The Guy You know how sometimes you need to do something a little spontaneous and you require random things? This friend has these things. Need a screwdriver? Got it. Need a car to borrow? Just fill her up. Need a date Saturday night? What's your type? (Note: The Guy doesn't necessarily mean it's a male. The title comes from the phrase "I have a guy for that." Don't take it literally). 3. The One With Connections