30 Day Workout: Goku Style
So you wanna get in shape, huh? But not just any shape. You wanna get mother-fuckin' Super Saiyain SWOLE. Well then, you're gonna need some intructions. This level of raw power is not something you can just fall into. It takes rigor, discipline, and an insatiable desire to be better than you are. You've got all that? Well let's get started then. This is a 30 day plan. Be warned, though! This is not for beginners! No, this is for the well-initiated, those who devote countless hours to achieving maximum physical perfection. Not for the faint of heart. You're gonna need to find yourself a gravity chamber, and crank that bad boy up to 10x Earth's gravity. If you find it hard to get into a gravity chamber, you can wear 10 pound wrist and ankle weights, with a 50 pound weight vest. Your first 5 days are gonna look like this: Pushups: 50/set, 4 sets 1 hour run Crunches: 50/set. 4 sets 45 minute run One-handed pushups: 25/set, 4 sets 30 minute run Inverted Sit-ups (Hang from a bar): 30/set, 3 sets 15 minute sprint 1 hour Plank 30min side plank, either side Cool down with a 5 minute sprint. Okay, now we're getting warmed up. This middle section is gonna be where things really heat up. It's gonna be a straight 20 days of this workout, and it will be sure to coax every bit of potential out of you. If you begin to doubt yourself, just know that there is no weak sauce allowed in the gravity chamber. NONE. Standing pushups: 75/set, 2 sets 80lb Squat: 25/set, 6 sets Pull-ups: 100/set. 4 sets Butterfly crunches: 40/set, 6 sets Burpees: 100/set, 8 sets 1hr Sprint Repeat this small workout on 15x gravity, or add another 40lbs to your body weights. You'll start seeing the results of this training in no time. For your last 5 days, you're gonna need to hop in the hyperbolic time chamber to really maximize your workout. You're gonna want to bring a sparring partner too, because a lot of this will be martial arts practice training. A dummy could suffice if you can't find someone who will commit. It will feel like years are passing for you, so be sure to stock up on provisions. The hyperbolic time chamber is a place outside of time, so when you emerge it will be as though only five days have passed. This will be your daily workout for all of those years. Spar for 3 hours Eat a protein-heavy meal. Fingertip pushups: 45/set, 6 sets One armed pushups: 100/set, 3 sets One finger pushups: 50/set, 3 sets Inverted situps: 60/set, 4 sets 1hr Plank 1hr side plank, either side Burpees: 60/set. 5 sets Standing pushups: 60/set, 4 sets One armed standing pushups: 25/set, 3 sets 6 hour run If you manage to get through all this, you'll come out looking like the biggest person in history. No one will be able to stand against you. You'll likely be around or even under 1% body fat. You have achieved perfection. Congrats, warrior. You've done it.
How to Work Out Like Deadpool
It's been a little while since I posted a superhero workout, so I thought I'd do one for one of Vingle's favorite Marvel characters: Deadpool. The merc with a mouth has a body that regenerates, but that means he probably has to do a lot to keep himself in peak physical condition. New muscles need a workout! Luckily, there's a great workout for Deadpool (and those of us who just wish we had his abs). Follow my Superhero Workouts collection so you don't miss the next one! The Workout If you want to diversify your normal routine, check out this Deadpool-themed workout! You'll get a well-rounded session, and because a few of these techniques are uncommon (reverse plank kicks and seagulls for example), you can get a more intense workout. Pro Tip Early in his career, Ryan Reynolds (who is playing Deadpool in the upcoming movie) said that he was very unhealthy in his habits, but that diversifying his workout helped him achieve his fitness goals. He also begins and ends every workout with an ab circuit (you can see the technique here- it's the second image on this block). The Music Because we all know Deadpool listens to upbeat pop music. Blast this in your headphones the next time you lift. The Cool-Down In true Wade Wilson style, you should definitely treat yourself to a chimichanga! Check out this recipe for a healthier version of this favorite dish (via): 10 brown rice tortillas or whole wheat 1 pound lean ground turkey or beef 1 cup chopped onion 1 cup mushrooms, sliced 1 garlic clove, minced 1 teaspoon dried oregano 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 cup tomato sauce 1 cup shredded Mexican Blend style cheese, reduced fat Optional: 1-2 teaspoons chili powder Instructions Preheat oven to 350 degrees. [Skip this step if not using brown rice tortillas] Saute brown rice tortillas until softened, using non stick cooking spray in a saute pan, set aside. Spray a baking sheet with nonstick cooking spray. Set aside. In a saute pan, add ground turkey, onion, garlic, mushroom and cook until meat is browned. Stir tomato sauce into the beef and veggies, add oregano and chili powder if using. Bring sauce to a boil, reduce heat and simmer about 5 minutes until sauce thickens. Remove from heat and set aside. Spoon about a 1/2 cup of filling down center of each tortilla. Add cheese to each. Fold in sides and roll up to enclose filling. Bake for 20-30 minutes until crispy. Top with salsa, scallions, or tomatoes. Wo-hoo! You're officially ready to start kicking some serious butt.