Be Strong. Be Kind.

This is a real life example that happened to me not too long ago. To tell you a little about me, I am a very honest and loving person. I try my hardest to be kind and gentle to every person I meet, because every individuals' feelings matter. Every person has emotions, morals, problems, and mindsets different than our own. That does not mean we should degrade and discriminate those people for feeling different than us. Here is my story. Not too long ago, at the business i work at, an elderly gentleman came in about a situation. While my coworkers attended to his needs, I sat in the office at my desk preparing an invoice and receipt for this man. We engaged in small talk and discovered we had some things in common. Though he was many decades older than I, he too had moved out and finished school at sixteen years old, and pursued his life the way he desired. He traveled many different countries and met many different variations of people. I too had been to a few countries which we discussed. But, then he noticed the ring on my left hand and our small innocent talk turned into a dark burden I was shocked he expressed to me. He asked about my fiance and how much older he was than me. I explained that he was barely five years older than me and we had known each other since we were small children. Growing up together was enjoyable, then he moved for a couple years but once he moved back our friendship grew as we aged. By the time we knew it we were madly in love and wanted nothing but happiness together. Sadly, this was not the answer this elderly man wanted to hear. For the next hour, he ranted on about how he is simply using me for control and how he doesn't actually love me (mind you, before this moment I had never met this customer in my life), he told me it will simply end after five years. He mentioned he had been married seven times and got tired of each "old hag" after five to six years. He told me he wouldn't even consider marrying a woman who hasn't been around the block a few times with multiple partners. I was utterly disgusted as personally i cannot emotionally or physically give myself to someone unless i know that i love them and would enjoy spending the rest of my life with them. Its not a religious belief, it is simply my own emotional experience, i am a reserved individual. After roughly forty-five minutes of this man flat out telling me i am a "piece of sh!t" for not leaving the "bastard" and traveling the world alone and sleeping with every man to figure out what type i like, I was pretty choked up and so close to bawling my eyes out. He continued his rant by asking me, "Tell me, why is he really marrying you? Why are you even marrying him?" and I was previously so emotionally tormented by my own personal problems a few months earlier due to an abusive father-figure, i was on the verge of breaking down and couldn't answer his question because i was trying so hard to resist the urge to cry. With no reply the old man simply stated, "See, you cant even answer me. You stupid little girl." A few minutes after that, i told my boss i needed to leave immediately due to a family emergency, which sadly, there was an issue currently happening with my brother-in-law as well at the time. Since that moment, after many separate occasions of strangers degrading me as a human being and family members tearing me apart, i have been baffled by the nerve of some people.

How to manage disliking someone

There's plenty of people we don't like; perhaps even hate. It's human nature and completely rational. Please do remember that how you feel is very real, never pass it off as something small. If you feel a certain way, know that it is real. Even if it seems irrational or stupid, you are human and how you feel is a delicate subject so treat others and yourself kindly and take consideration to every emotion. Here's how to deal with hate: 1. If you feel it's necessary, communicate with that person in a mature manner. No need for drama, but attempt to talk it out with this person. Maybe there is a miscommunication and a little explanation from both sides needs to be spoken. As I said though, remember that the other persons feelings matter as much as yours; find a medium for the situation. 2. Ignore it. If it truly is something small like they ate your food without asking, perhaps casually bring it up saying "hey could you please ask next time" and the situation is solved. Or simply let it go. If it could turn into a fight, ignore it unless things escalate extremely (such as stealing food from you to take to their home because they're lazy, not because they don't have money). 3. Keep distance for a while. Sometimes all you need is some space from people who drive you crazy. 4. Lastly, if the situation is dire, never contact them again. Some situations are best left untouched and if someone hurts you that bad, it's not wrong to leave them. Your mental health is more important than a detrimental friendship. You are delicate and don't deserve to be treated poorly.
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Staying happy in school

Whether it's high school, college, or even middle school, times do get difficult and keeping your happiness is key. Though it seems impossible to remain thrilled through endless hours of schoolwork, it's very important to have a stable mindset. Often, American students have clinical and severe depression which can lead to detrimental illness, both physical and mental, or even suicide. Schoolwork is hard and tiresome, and finding something to keep your mind healthy is a task more difficult than most expect but here are some tips to finding your own joy. 1. Discover a hobby. The obvious one, find an activity to occupy your free time that you enjoy and take advantage of this occupation while stressed or nervous. Studies prove that engaging in an activity you truly enjoy reduces stress immensely and encourages happier emotions. 2. Find love in someone. Whether it's a significant other, a family member, or a pet of any kind, you need love in your life. Your emotions and mind are valuable in states of pressure which occur most often while in school. Keeping your mind positive with love and support from individuals reduces risk of suicidal thoughts and acts of self destruction. It is so SO important that you find love in at least one person or thing. For certain people, often introverts, finding love in books or physical items can work wonders as well as with a human being. What ever you find love in, pursue it and hold it close. 3. Worry, but don't worry. If you know you are a person who always gets things done (sometimes sooner than later), try not to worry as much. Be confident in the fact that you know the task will be finished by the due date unless other arrangements can be made. But do not be lazy. Don't take advantage of the confidence, know you will need to get this task done, but do take your time. The best things are never rushed. The slower you finish something, sometimes the better the result, as long as in the end it is completed. 4. Sleep responsibly. You know your body and your sleep patterns. You know how much you need to be active and functional. But let yourself slide occasionally. If you know you have no plans the next day, stay up all night and sleep in. It is good for your health to switch things up and will be beneficial to your moods if you do something out of your normal routine but still enjoy what you were doing.

How to have the perfect date

The perfect date: every girls dream. At times you may feel clueless as to what to do on a date, especially if you live in a small town. For me, I like to have fun but keep it cheap. My fiancé and I often go on small trips to rite aid to grab an ice cream cone and enjoy it at a bench in the park together. But we do go out on special occasion, and here are tips on how to keep the price down yet have a blast! 1. Don't plan too much. Let it be a spontaneous thing, granted you still choose the Restaurant and area, but keep your options open and let your heart guide you to the perfect place. 2. A date doesn't have to be expensive. When I go on a date, I pick a lovely restaurant but at times on a low budget, we will order chicken strips (our food of choice). Though they are seen as a child's dish, it is still a wonderful meal when in a fancy place and will fill you up. Perhaps even share a steak and have room and money for a nice dessert. 3. Walk downtown. I love to take a walk with my love down to all the little shops and look at the unique items in each place. Though I may not buy anything, I still enjoy sharing my findings with my babe and laughing over interesting items I may come across. 4. Dress fancy, or casual. You don't need to look like a princess to enjoy your date, but if you would like to, there's no reason why you shouldn't. Your partner shouldn't mind how you want to dress as long as you're comfortable. They will think you're beautiful/handsome no matter what.

Why baths are better than showers (opinionated)

Most believe showers are better and healthier because they quickly wash off the dirt of the day and leave your body fresh and clean, but honestly, baths are theoretically more efficient. Here's why: Baths are like an at-home jacuzzi. Filled with bubbly, richly scented soaps and salts, you feel right at home. But that isn't the only thing superior about baths. Bathing has psychologically been proven to be healthier than showers, not because they're warm and smell good, but because they clean deeper than the skin. The heat and scents relax your mind, sending it into a phase that is midway between subconscious and conscious, allowing your muscles to relax almost as if asleep. Your heart slows and body functions slow and after the torture of a hard day at work or school, this is exactly what your body needs; rest. When your body enters this level, stress eradicates itself, and your brain projects good memories, dreams, or even nothing at all depending on your average brain activity. Soaking in the warm water releases tension that is holding in your bones and muscles and releases toxins in your body so be sure to drink plenty of water! Typically, people who take baths are more likely to have a patient, calm, and relaxed personality and handle situations the most gentle and easy way possible, whereas those who shower are more likely to be rushed, frustrated, and are easily irritated and handle situations in negative ways and the harshest just to ensure the problem is over. Needless to say, this study is based on stereotype and select projects and can never be determined for sure as every human being is different and has different tastes. But what's not to try? Mix up your bathing life, add bath salts and experiment with bubble soap and try natural oils. It's all based on making you happy and helping you grow psychologically and keeping your mind as healthy as possible, not deteriorating it with stress.