What the hell are you doing Miss.Tuffsey?
It's been a while since we've checked in with my demonic cat Twiggy (AKA Miss.Tuffsey, that's her rap name). So here, to compare her conquests to that of your feline friend, here are 7 questions your cat needs to answer...like right now.
Why must you victimize me when I try to say hello to you?
How about a "hi mom! Thank you for feeding me. You can pet me without losing an eye!"
Why do you think it's okay to sit on top of things I need for like...work or school?
Furthermore, why are you embarrassed to be seen with me?
I give you life, literally. You'd be running around a farm getting chased by wolves if I hadn't taken you in!
Why do you make me congratulate you for sleeping all day?
I have a job so I can pay for your expensive cat food, toys and treats...and you are like "I didn't scratch the hell out of you, give me a high five"? No...
Why do you think it's okay to spy on our neighbors?
Inconsiderate and nosy!
Why do you judge everything I do?
I'm only human Miss. Tuffsey.
And last but not least, why are you so cute?
...I hate how much I love my cat.