2 years ago
jordanhamilton
in English ยท 1,309 Views
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When Text Messages Become Read Receipts And Mixed Memories

I used to roll over to your texts each morning.

Eyes full of crust and a heart full of love. My mornings weren't quite complete without a "good morning" text followed by an emoji. Texting throughout the day became the norm and neither one of us expected anything less. Our conversation didn't consist of much: random emojis and plans to hang over the following days, but that was just enough for the both of us. Flirting between blue bubbles filled with words we were too afraid to say in person and the anticipation of receiving a text we were too afraid to read. That was pretty much life for the short amount of time it lasted. I guess we might of both got too comfortable. Kinda like the way you feel after eating four slices of pizza and casually laying across your couch after a long day of work -- you don't want to move. Neither one of us wanted to move, we were good where we were at. Little did we know, things were bound to change. And they did.
Fast forward nearly a month and those blue bubbles disappeared.

They visit every once in awhile and are filled with words that have no meaning. "Hey's" and "What's Up?". No longer are the days of rolling over to texts filled with emojis early in the morning. No longer are the days of making plans for later in the week and sending emojis just because to pass the time.
Things changed.
You changed.
I don't judge you. I don't hate you.

My mind is filled with mixed memories and my phone is full of read messages that my pride won't allow me to reply to. Are you deserving? At one point. But I knew the person who sent me text messages with the rising and the setting of the sun. I guess one word is better than no words, but then again -- why waste words? I'll keep the memories. You can keep the text.
Mixed emotions, mixed memories. Read texts and no replies. I contemplate blocking your number, but what good would that do? I'll still lay in bed, crust in my eyes at the crack of dawn waiting for you.
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