It's my last day in New York, and I stumble into the office like a ghost feeling pretty okay, wearing my new shirt from Kate Moss' line for Mango. In 24 hours I'll be back in Cleveland for a few fleeting days before starting my next adventure. I'm looking forward to seeing my friends, my cat and of course my grumpy dad. Things move quickly.
I didn't know how to put into words the feeling I'm experiencing today. It's not sadness, regret or even relief. It's an odd mixture of anxiety, gratitude and anticipation.
Breaking your habits and exiting the safety of your comfort zone are two things that humans dread doing, but they are necessary parts of life. I don't have any long-winded or sweepingly metaphoric explanation for any of this. It's just the truth: changes do not have to change you, they just have to change the circumstance.
This post is not a cold-blooded bummer, or the one I thought I was going to write today. It's not pretty, long or profound, it just is.
When things change humans ignorantly fight. It's just part of our nature. We're stubborn creatures of habit that complain when someone leaves the onions on our sandwich when we request to go without. We cast judging glances at people who take our regular seat on the subway, and we definitely do not like to uproot and leave our routines behind.
I can't say that it's easy for me to change. It's not. And I'd be lying if I said I was a totally fluid person, ready to jump off every cliff I see.
But living in the city that never sleeps has taught me that not every cliff you jump off is high enough to kill you.
So just jump, because you'll never know what beautiful lagoon you'll have missed splashing into by staying on the shore.
Because honestly, who would want to stay the same person their whole life?