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How to Be a Good Kisser

10 Tips From Scientific Research: What Does Science Say About How To Be A Good Kisser?

In all fairness, how to be a good kisser is something no one really gets instruction in. Yet, it can be a huge part of one’s personal life and the sources we do get info from are, well, far from scientific. Let’s tackle it.

Have No Illusions: Kissing Is Important

Research shows kissing frequency correlates with relationship satisfaction. 59% of men and 66% of women have ended a relationship because someone was a bad kisser. People remember their first kiss more vividly than the first time they had sex.
Psychologist John Bohannon from Butler University has found that most of us can recall up to 90 percent of the details of a first romantic kiss. In his study of five hundred people, most remembered this experience more vividly than their first sexual encounter. Movies like “Pretty Woman” have said that prostitutes don’t kiss on the mouth because it’s too intimate. Refraining from mouth-to-mouth kissing has been common among women of the “oldest profession” for a very long time. Social scientists Joanna Brewis and Stephen Linstead report that prostitutes often won’t kiss because it requires a “genuine desire and love for the other person.”By avoiding the lips of a client, they are best able to keep emotions out of their work.
A ten-year psychology study undertaken in Germany during the 1980s found that men who kissed their wives before leaving for work lived, on average, five years longer, earning 20 to 30 percent more than peers who left without a peck good-bye. The researchers also reported that not kissing one’s wife before leaving in the morning increased the possibility of a car accident by 50 percent. Psychologists do not believe it’s the kiss itself that accounts for the difference but rather that kissers were likely to begin the day with a positive attitude, leading to a healthier lifestyle.

Why Do We Kiss?

Kissing is how we test if someone would (biologically) be a good mate. A good deal of the scientific literature speculates that kissing may have evolved to help us choose a suitable partner, or to realize when a match is a bad idea…The exchange of olfactory, tactile, and postural information might trigger unconscious mechanisms that guide us in deciding whether we should continue, and a kiss might even tell us about a potential partner’s level of commitment and genetic compatibility. How kissing is perceived: - It matters a lot more to women than men. - Women were very focused on men’s teeth and hygiene. - Men were much more likely to see kissing as a mere step toward sex. - Other studies reveal these differences held true across cultures. Women were far more likely to see kissing as a good way to assess a potential mate or to initiate, maintain, and monitor a long-term relationship. They also rated the breath and taste of a man’s kiss as highly significant in determining whether to keep on kissing him in the moment or the future. Women were far more interested in healthy-looking teeth, and reported valuing the experience of kissing much more than men did— before, during, and after a sexual encounter. Men, on the other hand, were much less picky about kissing and far more interested in facial and bodily attractiveness.

How Do You Find Out If Someone Wants To Kiss You?

This dilemma probably produces more nervousness and awkwardness than anything else related to kissing. All the sources I checked agreed: It’s a matter of breaking into your partner’s personal space in a plausibly deniable way and gauging their reaction. It’s important to note that whether or not your intentions are romantic, to kiss another person on the cheek or elsewhere— or to sniff him or her—it’s necessary to move into that individual’s “personal space.” To get this close, there must be some level of trust or expectation. Thus delivering a friendly kiss or sniff, or receiving one, amounts to an unspoken gesture of acceptance. The best specific method came from pick-up artist David D'Angelo: Guys, adjust a woman’s hair. It’s an intimate enough gesture that a flinch can tell you she’s not interested – while a more pleasant response could be a green light. Either way it provides the information necessary without making things tooawkward for either party.

Advice for Women

For The Art of Kissing William Cane asked men what their biggest complaints and desires were regarding kissing. Ladies, want to make guys think you’re a great kisser? Here are some takeaways from the research: - Open your mouth more. Research shows men prefer “wetter kisses with more tongue. - Initiate more. - Be more aggressive with your tongue and take an active part in the kiss. You could probably sum them all up by saying: Stop holding back.

Advice For Men

- Don’t jam your tongue down her throat. This was women’s most frequent complaint. You’re kissing her, not trying to implant an alien embryo in her stomach. - Keep your ears attuned to her breathing. Bluntly, make sure you’re allowing her to breathe. Women tend to enjoy kissing more when they’re not being suffocated. - “Listen” to the way she’s kissing.Match her tempo. Reply to her tongue action with similar tongue action. Leading and being aggressive can be good but being oblivious is bad. Also, aligning with the research on hygiene, take care of your teeth, use mouthwash and carry mints. No matter how attractive someone may be, poor hygiene can kill the moment before it even begins. This is particularly true for men. As preceding chapters have described,women depend heavily on taste and smell and pay close attention to teeth when evaluating a partner.
A few other tidbits from an interview with William Cane, author of The Art of kissing: - “53% of women prefer (to kiss) a clean-shaven man.” - “Women’s favorite spot to be kissed, other than the mouth, is the neck.Ninety-six percent of women reported that they like neck kisses, while only about 10% of men do.” - “Women also complain that men don’t do enough variations in kissing, that they’re too machine-like or repetitive. Women would like a number of different kisses: the neck, the ears, “liposuction,” which is moving from the upper lip to the lower lip…be creative.”

And It’s Not All About Technique

As Sun Tzu said, “all wars are won or lost before they are ever fought.” By and large, the same is true about kissing. You can be a great kisser but behave in a way that makes sure no one ever wants to kiss you. Circumstances can hamper things as well. - Looking good matters, so look good. Yeah, it’s obvious but if you’re the guy wearing black socks with sandals and a fanny pack, take note. (More on the scientific approach to being sexier here and here). - Set the stage. Getting to know one another eases awkwardness and lays the groundwork for a hormonal profile conducive to intimacy. Love researcher Arthur Aron has a list of questions shown to make people bond almost instantly. - Context matters. If you want it to go well, pick the right time, not some sloppy smothering outside the bar. I’ve posted before about the things that help in this area; dim lights, wearing red, sharing secrets and a touch of excitement can all be a good lead-in. - Get to know your partner’s likes and dislikes. Kissing isn’t an Olympic sport judged by an objective 1-10 score. A big part of it is personal preference. Get to know your partner and you will become a better kisser in their eyes as the relationship progresses.

Now go practice some “science.”

i agree with you sooo much. but some people just don't get that. @JoeyNelson
Have a clean mouth** ugh
hygiene is the most important part to me. I want us both to be showered and have a clean before, it makes it a lot hotter.
"You can be a great kisser but behave in a way that makes sure no one ever wants to kiss you" that is the TRUTH
I could NEVER be with someone if I didn't like their kissing! Back in my 20's there was this guy that liked me, and he was REALLY Cute! Like outta my league cute, so I tried to get past the bad kissing, but I just couldn't! LoL 5 years later, I kissed this guy at a bar, after knowing him for an hour, That was 19 years ago, married 16. I KNEW from the minute I kissed him, that I was going to marry him! He's still an AMAZING kisser!
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I've been trying to improve my French recently, and came across these awesome YouTubers called DamonandJo. They have self-taught themselves nearly 6 languages! I believe they speak French, Spanish, Portugese, Italian, German, and of course English! You can either watch the video above (which I suggest cause they have the BEST sense of humor) or check out their tips below: 1. Follow Famous YouTubers in the language you want to learn! There are tons of youtubers in other languages, and often if they are famous enough, there will be english subtitles. Listen to them to hear real people speaking the language rather than a text book! They're usually super entertaining too so it helps :) 2. Follow those YouTubers or famous people on twitter so you see that language each day! The easiest way to get used to a foreign language is to see it all the time and this really helps! 3. Change your phone/facebook/etc language to your desired language! Since you probably already know where everything is in your phone or facebook, you wont be confused and you'll learn a ton of new vocab! 4. Listen to audio books in the language you want!!! Audible has a ton of foreign language books. Try starting with a book you already know well (like Harry Potter for me - I'm trying to read that in Korean right now...) and listen throughout your day! 5. Sign up for foreign magazines or newsletters! Or even better download their app in another language! For example, my boyfriend gets push notification from Le Monde which is a french newspaper :) Even if you only read the headline, its practice. 6. Try cooking a meal using a recipe in a different language! You start to learn that a lot of words you actually already know (for example, sauté means the same thing in french and in korean bokkeum (like bokkeumbap) means fried! so literally "fried rice!" 7. Watch TV shows in the language Duh!!!! 8. Talk to yourself and dont be afraid! Practice speaking whenever you can, even to people who are strangers! be brave! What languages are you trying to learn?!
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스팸 요즘 한국에서야 스팸을 공짜로 뿌린다면 유토피아가 됐다며 좋아하겠지만 공짜 스팸이라고 꼭 좋지만은 않았다. 2차대전을 보면 특히 그렇다. 1940년 영국의 식량사정은 개박살난 상태였는데 왜냐면 나치새끼들이 잠수함을 때려박아서 온 바다에서 분탕질을 치고 있었기 때문이다 식량 상당수를 해외에 의존하는 영국에게는 심각한 문제였다 당시 영국이 얼마나 굶고 살았냐면 배급표를 보면 알 수 있는데 영국 성인 남자가 받을 수 있는 식량은 고기 550g과 달걀 반 개가 전부였다 고기 550g이면 삼겹살 3인분 정도 된다. 충분히 많지 않냐는 생각이 들 텐데 이걸로 1주일 버티라고 하면 생각이 좀 달라질걸 하루에 고기 0.5인분 이하니까 그런데 갓조국 미국이 전쟁에 참가하고 동맹국한테 식량을 무자비하게 뿌리기 시작하면서 식량의 양적인 상황은 많이 나아지기 시작한다 갓조국이 뿌린 음식 중에 가장 큰 비중을 차지하는 것이 바로 스팸이었는데 말 그대로 수억 개씩 뿌려댄 덕분에 영국 사람들은 처음 몇 달 정도는 환호했다 물론 아침에 스팸 수프먹고 점식으로 스팸 바베큐먹고 저녁으로 스팸 스튜 먹는 걸 6달 정도 반복한 뒤에는 앵간히 인성 좋아도 욕을 참기 힘들 것이다 근데 스팸 안 먹으면 다른 선택지가 별로 없거든 굶어 뒤지는건 별로 유쾌한 선택지가 아니다보니 다들 꾸역꾸역 스팸을 먹게되고 결국 스팸은 공전의 대박을 치는 초히트상품이 된다 영국인들은 조금이라도 스팸을 덜 물리게 먹어보려고 온갖 음식을 개발했는데 그래봤자 유전자 단위로 요리재능에 파멸을 선고받은 영국인들인지라 결과물은 신통치않다 당장 저 유명한 스팸튀김부터 시작해서 스팸 팬케이크라든지 딸기잼에 찍어먹는 스팸도넛이라던지 파멸적인 음식들이 탄생하게 된다 이런걸 먹고도 전쟁에서 싸운 영국군들에게 경의를 표할 수 밖에 없다 스팸메일이란 표현의 유래가 되었을 정도로 스팸 이미지가 개똥일만도 하다 스팸 비싸서 명절 선물로 교환하는 한국은 서양권에서 보면 상당히 특이한 이미지겠지 딱히 영국에만 스팸이 뿌려진 것은 아닌고로 다른 장소에서도 남아도는 스팸을 이용한 요리가 발달하는데, 하와이에서 발달한 스팸 무스비처럼 그럴싸한 요리도 있다. 왜 뜬금없이 하와이에서 일본음식에 들어가는 무스비와 스팸이 퓨전합체를 하는지는 모르겠다만 아무튼 하와이 음식임 넓게 보면 부대찌개도 이 부류에 들어간다 물론 개중에는 영국만큼이나 끔찍한 피조물이 탄생하기도 하는데 홍콩의 스팸 라멘이 그것이다 누가 영국식민지 아니랄까봐 진짜 굉장한 비쥬얼이다 장어 스팸과 마찬가지로 국내에선 비싼데 영국에선 개싸구려 이미지인 케이스다 원래 영국에서 장어 하면 가난뱅이 새끼들이나 먹는 생존식품이라는 이미지였다 고슴도치 고기나 비둘기 구이쯤 되는 이미지였던거지 그럴만한 이유가 있었는데 영국은 제일 먼저 산업혁명을 일으킨 나라라는데서 장어 이미지가 박살난다 장어가 우리는 노예가 되지 않는다며 러다이트 운동을 일으켰기 때문은 아니고, 산업혁명으로 우후죽순 세워진 공장들에서 나온 폐수가 다 어디로 갔을 거 같음? 템스강으로 전부 흘러갔다. 곧 템스강은 참피 수영장만도 못한 끔찍한 꼬라지로 바뀌었고 템스강에 살던 물고기 새끼들은 전부 용궁으로 사출당했다 장어만 빼고. 장어는 그 지랄이 난 템스강에서도 오히려 활개치면서 활발히 번식했다 다들 알다시피 장어는 진짜 엄청나게 생명력이 강한 생선인데 이 놈이 정력에 좋다는 소문도 그 생명력에서 비롯된거다. 대갈통 잘라서 냄비에 넣고 끓여도 도무지 뒤지질 않는 존나 킹기도라같은 놈이다. 장어가 안 뒤지면 좋은 거 아니냐는 생각이 들 수도 있지만 생각해봐라 폐수 오염물질 둥둥 떠다니는 곳에서 살아가는 생선 건져먹을 생각이 드냐 당연히 멀쩡한 사람이면 안 건드리지. 내일 설사로 뒤지더라도 오늘 고기맛은 봐야겠다는 흙수저들이나 건져먹는게 장어였다 근데 2차대전이 터졌다. 그리고 잔혹한 소금돼지시체뭉침 스팸이 식탁을 점령하기 시작했다. 결국 영국인들은 절규하며 강가로 몰려들기 시작했다. 이리하여 빈민들이나 먹던 장어는 전영국인이 즐기는 대중식품으로 격상하게 된다 아 차라리 격상하지 않는게 좋지 않았을까 쓰레기물에서 살아서 그렇지 비쥬얼도 그야말로 쓰레기 그 자체다 어떻게 소스까지 초록색이지 색깔이 참피색인 이유는 전쟁 중에도 그나마 쉽게 구할 수 있는 파슬리로 소스를 만들어서 그런데 암만 봐도 참피 갈아서 만든 것처럼 생겼다 장어를 그냥 굽고 젤리 될 때까지 만든 장어 젤리와 장어 토막친 것과 파이에 초록 소스를 끼얹어 내는 파이 앤 매시는 스팸을 제외하면 거의 유일하게 먹을 수 있는 육류였기 때문에 또 대박을 친다 다만 이런 튀김+국물 조합은 재료의 품질을 숨길 수 있는 좋은 방법이기도 해서 썩어가는 장어로 만든 파이 앤 매시 떄문에 벌어지는 수많은 식중독은 어쩔 수 없는 부작용이었다 팝콘 영화관 하면 팝콘을 빼놓을 수 없다 X스맨 X크 X닉스 같은 X같은 영화를 보면 내 손 안에 팝콘이 들려있다는게 그렇게 감사할 수가 없다. 진 그레이가 개소리 떠는 걸 보느니 입안에서 팝콘 부서지는 소리 감상하는게 몇 배는 더 박진감 넘친다 그런데 의외로 팝콘=영화관 이미지가 잡힌것도 2차대전 때의 일이다 2차 대전에도 미국 영화 산업은 존나게 활발했는데, 이 당시에는 오히려 영화관에 팝콘 들고가는게 금지였다 왜 금지인지 이유가 안 떠오르면 최근 영화관 갔다가 영화 끝났을 때 영화관 바닥의 참상을 생각해보자 바닥에 끝없이 널려있는 팝콘쪼가리를 영화관 주인 입장에서 생각해보면 욕지거리가 터질 것이다 그래서 2차머전까지 영화관에서 인기있는 식품은 달달한 초콜릿이나 사탕 계통의 음식이었고 팝콘은 길거리에서 가끔 사먹는 싸구려 음식 정도의 이미지였다 그런데 2차머전이 터지고 나서 이 잘나가던 영화관 초콜릿이 전멸해버리는데, 왜냐면 초콜릿 생산량이 전부 군바리들에게로 몰렸기 때문이다 다들 알다시피 전쟁터에서 단 거 만큼 절박한게 없다 아무리 갓조국이라도 군인한테 설탕 몰빵해주면서 민간에까지 뿌릴 여유는 없었기 때문에 곧 미국 전역은 당분 부족에 시달리게 되는데 영화관도 예외는 아니었다 이런 상황에서 영화 보면서 혓바닥이 심심하신 관객들을 위해서 등장한 것이 싸구려 식품의 대명사 팝콘이었다 팝콘은 원가가 진짜 싸도 너무 싸서 전쟁 중의 박살난 경제 상황 중에서도 충분히 저가로 공급될 수 있었다 결국 팝콘이 영화관 식품의 대명사가 될 때까지는 채 5년도 걸리지 않았다 근데 분명 싸서 경쟁력 가졌던 새끼들인데 요즘 가격은 왤케 창렬인지 모르겠다 X발 옥수수 덩어리에 꿀 존나 얇게 처발랐더니 국밥 두 그릇 가격이 나오네 개새끼들 결론은 영화관에 국밥을 들고갈 수 있게 해야 한다는 것이다 [출처 - 개드립] 놀랍게도 심한 욕은 필터링한 상태입니다 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ