Last night before bed, you placed your laptop on the empty space next to you on your mattress; a spot that was kept warm by another human being until they left you and you replaced their heat with one coming from a machine. As this thought passed through your mind, you decided you'd lose your night to YouTube and anything that made you forget the type of loneliness you feel everyday.
You did the usual thing, you searched for funny cat videos, live band performances, and movie trailers. You spent a couple of hours looking for something that would engage you and each hour felt like a day had passed. When you were finally ready to give up and succumb to your thoughts, that's when the trailer appeared in front of you. Recommended videos, it said. Yeah right, you thought.
You clicked play on Tom Hooper's latest film The Danish Girl.
As the film's narrative exposed itself to you, you started to feel a soft rumble in your gut. Something was telling you to wake up and pay attention. It said, this might help. It said, you might want to keep your eyes open. It said, please just for a couple minutes, stay awake.
So you did. On screen, you watched Eddie Redmayne play Lili Elbe and while you felt somewhat connected to the film because of the way you feel about yourself, you still felt a little weird about a cisgendered person playing someone who was trans (this problem exists in About Ray as well).
Eventually, though, you felt okay with the casting decision because the most important thing is that there are movies being made about trans people. And that's all you really wanted anyway. You're happy that movies like The Danish Girl exist because they're the first step in proper representation.
After the trailer ends, you watch it a second and third time before finally shutting your eyes (and the laptop) to sleep happily.
The Danish Girl will be in theaters November 27th, 2015