There's something about being a single person that makes you feel like you only see couples when you walk down the street. Everyone you don't know (and probably everyone you know) seems to be in a relationship. They're holding hands as they walk down Broadway, they're slow-dancing in the corner of your favorite bar, and they're whispering in each other's ears throughout the whole movie.
And then comes Yorgos Lanthimos's The Lobster. A movie that makes you feel even worse about being alone. The premise involves a dystopian future where single people are brought to a place called The Hotel to find love in forty-five days or else they'll be turned into an animal.
Yup. That's right. Turned into an animal. And you think maybe that the world would run better that way. You don't read much but you'd like to believe that people in couples are generally happier than you, -- a single-serving idiot -- so they've got to be better at running the world than you.
And don't forget, you're alone. And your loneliness is what makes you sad. And your sadness, well, that doesn't contribute to anything except your embarrassing bank statement that says you spent the last couple days getting the same meal at Burger King (see: Large Whopper, Large Fries, Chicken Nuggets, and a Large Sprite). This is a sad, depressed, lonely person's meal.
You think about what animal you'd want to be turned into because you know that you wouldn't find love in forty-five days, let alone forty-five years. You think you'd be a dog. Because dogs are good. But it's important to know what kind of dog you would be. Maybe something strong, something stronger than you, a German Shepard or a St. Bernard.
But this is the rest of my life, you think to yourself. You decide that you'll choose a dog that fits your personality. Probably, maybe a beagle. Yeah, a beagle. You've always liked beagles and you had this one dream where everything worked out for you instead of exploding in your face. You had an apartment to yourself, a job that paid well, and a dog you named after LeBron James. That was a good dream.
You try to have that dream again every night because it's the only time you really feel happy but it doesn't happen. You only dream about the way you have been broken and those who have held the hammers.
You watch Colin Farrell awkwardly act his way through each scene and feel, a little less alone. You know find solace in the feeling that he has. You already feel ostracized and isolated because you're so alone in world filled with people that in relationships. And this movie makes you feel a little less like a social pariah. You wish The Hotel existed because you just want to meet people that feel the same way you do.
But then you have a realization. There are people that feel the same way you do. If there weren't, if you were truly alone, this movie would not have been made. Lanthimos wouldn't have written and directed the movie. It's a strange feeling -- trust me, I know how you must be feeling -- to smile but you do. You smile and feel better because you are not the only one who feels completely, wholly, and truly alone.