2 years ago
jordanhamilton
in English ยท 1,791 Views
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How To Find Yourself After Losing Him

Ladies, it is not the end of the world.

Sometimes we can get so caught up in a man that we lose ourself somewhere down the road. We love him more than we love ourselves and for that very reason, he sticks around, but doesn't reciprocate the love. Staying in an unhealthy relationship might seem fixable in the beginning, but staying is only doing you more damage than has already been done.
You stick around for months, maybe even years longer than you should. You have your good days and you have your bad days, but that is expected. What isn't expected is the idea that this man will change. In more cases than one, they usually never do. As women, we often thinking staying with a man will either help him change or help him see that you're worth working with. On behalf of all women, take it from a woman who has been down that road before -- it never quite happens.
At some point one of you will say enough is enough and spare the other the constant headache. Although things can change overtime [for the better], sometimes it isn't even worth trying to fix. Not everything that is broken can be mended. Of course, it will hurt. Of course, you will feel like someone took your heart and stomped on it, but please trust me -- it gets better with time. Time is of the essence and in order to heal, time is needed.
In most cases, you will probably try to look for what you're missing in others while going through this bout of loneliness, but don't look too far. Everything you've always needed has been right in front of your face the entire time. You might not see it right away, but with a mirror and these three ways, you will be able to find yourself in no time.

Look within yourself.

Everything you're probably looking for lies deep within yourself and you don't even know it because you've been focusing on others so much lately that you haven't taken the time to focus on yourself.

Get rid of the idea that you aren't complete.

You don't need another person to make you complete, or even a man for that matter. You are your own person and because of you [yourself], you are complete. Often times, we think another person in our lives will make us complete. All we need is ourselves. Anyone else coming along for the ride is just the icing on the cake.

Realize that it's okay to be selfish.

Being selfish when trying to find yourself allows you to take the designated amount of time that you need. Nobody deserves an explanation. Take care of you first and everything else will follow. At the end of the day, you can't rely on anyone but yourself and that is okay.
In order to every find solace or even love again for that matter, you must first find yourself. It may sound easier said than done, but it is doable. You needed yourself all along, but instead of loving yourself internally -- you loved a man completely, leaving no room to love yourself.
You have to dig deep, way past all the insecurities and the constant issues you face. A love for yourself lies somewhere within.
It gets better.
You will get better.
Love will get better.
Don't give up.
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