SkullBunneh
2 years ago500+ Views
Doing @katiems Challenge! I made a post about this once before, back a few months ago when I first joined Vingle. But with this challenge I thought to go into more detail about my weight issues.
Let it be known that since I was a kid, I've always had large thighs. The struggle of putting on jeans has been around since before I was 10. The pic above was me when I was about 8. I wasn't overweight either (though in the pic I'm sticking out my belly) I was a pretty healthy kid and ate up chicken, rice and beans like nobody's business!
And I stayed that way up until I was about 14. The above pic was when I was 17 (don't mind my angsty attire, I was teen in the 90's) I started to realize I had a few stretch marks on my inner thighs because my older sister pointed them out to me one afternoon when I was bike riding. It's sad that I still remember all that detail. By then, I was already becoming uncomfortable in my body. It didn't help that I'm not even 5 feet tall (I stopped growing when I was 14) and was constantly teased at school. When we had to take swimming classes, I skipped out because when I did join in the beginning jokes like, "Make sure you stay in the shallow end or you'll drown!" and "Aww! Someone get little Tiff some water wings!" were said often. Even outside the abuse continued. I was always made "short stop" during softball, always stood to the side during basketball, and always passed over during volleyball. In fact, during one game of volleyball, I was purposely targeted. I bent down to tie my shoe and when I stood up the girl on the other end of the court hit me right in the face with the ball... I was hit so hard I blacked out for a moment and my lipstick made a mark on the ball. The gym teacher had me sit on the bleachers while everyone laughed, even making a joke about the lipstick.
So it's safe to say I never had the desire to workout or be healthy. And it doesn't help that I'm a comfort eater as well. A load of other stressful events in my life led to many midnight snacks of Little Debbie brownies and no portion control. After I got married and had my kids, I gained over 40 lbs. At my heaviest I was 168lbs and only 4'11"
The above photo was taken May of 2014. My husband and I were in the wedding party for 2 of our friends. I was really afraid of being in the dress. I was scared it wouldn't fit even if I so much as gained 5lbs before the wedding. And I didn't like how bare my arms were or that I had to have my hair away from my shoulders and face. I also kept comparing myself to my friends in their dresses.
So by now you're wondering where Kpop has helped me. Well, I've always been a fan of many different kinds of music. I have a crap ton of different genres on my Spotify. But one of the genres that would guarantee to get me up and off my ass was Kpop! I love to dance and I love the music, but I didn't want to go to a gym. I was still afraid of being judged by others, especially people who didn't know me. I was afraid of the glances, the comments I'd never hear but knew were being said, and the giggles or chuckles. I decided to come up with my own routine to get 30 mins of dancing in every other day. Off to youtube I went! I searched for Kpop Workouts and found quite a bunch. One particular video caught my eye.
I thought, "I know this song!! I love this song!" JellyBeanNose also has a bunch of other videos for Kpop Workouts so I put together a youtube playlist of my favorites until they roughly reached 30mins. It was tough in the beginning, I won't lie. My knees would hurt the worst. I couldn't support my weight with my weak muscles and my ligaments were stiff. But after a few months and icepacks, I was starting to see the difference when I stepped on the scale. Every other week I lost a pound or two. As of right now, I'm 154lbs! I'm 14lbs lighter than I was this time last year! I can feel the difference when I put on a pair of pants or a shirt. I've also been eating better and cut stuff like soda, juice, and milk out of my diet. Water and tea is all I'll drink.
I've begun strengthening my muscles more in my arms and legs as of recent. Even more so because I'm jealous of Jackson's fabulous thighs and want a pair of my own! I learned when he was fencing he did 500 squats a day and I was like, "I don't know about 500, but maybe I can do half that throughout the day." So I'm in the process of fitting that into my schedule every day of the week, even the days I workout.
But no matter how much I workout, I'll never get use to the feeling of being so sweaty...
5 comments
That's so inspiring. It makes me want to go work out too! I'm so glad you found kpop and it made you happier! 😊
2 years ago·Reply
@Exoexo I try to upload a pic on my IG in hopes of inspiring others to do the same. Kpop has changed my life in so many ways! This is just one of them ^_^
2 years ago·Reply
@SkullBunneh I know exactly how you feel. Some people don't accept it and think that it's weird that I like kpop so much, but you guys are also open and honest that I feel comfortable in my own skin! 😄
2 years ago·Reply
@SkullBunneh Let me start by saying you rock!!! The struggle is real to be healthy, happy and confident. Never give up! I struggle with my yoyoing weight continously. What actually started me back working out was feeling uncomfortable in my clothes to the point that I was late for work changing so many time. One day I was checking out one of my favorite Korean rappers Loco on YouTube it show a song with him and a female artist. I hit play and thought you gotta work for it. The song is called Nice Body by Hyomin ft LOCO. it's always #1 on my workout Playlist. I love food so first I had to learn to cut portions then certain things had to go all together 😣 when I'm bored and want to eat I study Hangul and I'm learning to run. Fighting!!!!☺
2 years ago·Reply
@Emescia Thank you so much! It is hard and I've had some road blocks and gotten stuck in a rut a few times but I'm still at it. I think that's what important is to make it a new habit, a new normal part of my day.
2 years ago·Reply
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