2 years ago
Arellano1052
in English 2,860 Views
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My Biggest Turn-Offs
Okay... So, I've seen a few of these float around and it's a good practice. Not a lot of people consciously think about this stuff. Here goes lol I don't mean to step on any toes, and this is by no means anything but my personal opinion. It may seem a bit harsh to some, but please, actually consider it. And if it's still too harsh, I'm sure there are millions of guys who will disagree with this and you have your choosing of them ;p *wink, wonk* By the way, we should also do turn-on's ;p Oh, and I'm just putting random quotes in between these blocks haha I don't feel like finding appropriate images ;D
I would like to start out with.... I'm an adult. WE'RE effing adults. BE a freaking adult. I can't afford to have a shallow relationship anymore. I'm not in high school where I'm just a horny guy going off mainly looks. And in all honesty, I never was that type. I grew up on relationships were special things. Women were to be treated with utmost respect. Kisses meant something. Holding hands was special. Sex was the ultimate showing of love. Could you tell me how rare that upbringing seemingly is? Haha Anywho. I'm at the point where I need somebody who will advance me, both as an individual and in life. Somebody who will challenge me. Somebody who has goals and is actively pursuing them.
Turn off #1: Laziness. And I'm not talking about on your days off or free time either. Unless you don't have a job or go to school, and you aren't making an effort to do anything. I can't stand that. Do something. If something needs to be done, do it. You're no longer a child to where you should cut corners and avoid doing something because you don't feel like it. We're adults.
Turn off #2: Being... Uneducated. I wanted to put "being useless" but that seemed too harsh! This whole, "I don't cook or clean, nor do I go to work or school. I can't handle money and I have no priorities over social media or partying." Okay... I believe there are four things everybody should be able to do: Feed themselves. Run the basics of a household. Defend themselves. Basic mechanics. If you can't cook or clean and don't work or otherwise contribute to a relationship, then that's not your boyfriend or girlfriend. That's another parent/guardian. They're coddling you. Basically raising you again.
Turn off #3: Inconsistency and leading on. Inconsistency is one of my main ones. People may consider consistency boring, but I don't. It falls under the, "Don't play games with me" and "mixed signals". These games.... Ugh. I completely understand we all have bad days. I know I'm not always a ray of sunshine. But I'm at least consistent and prompt. Anybody who knows me, knows I'm cordial to everybody. I'm always looking to make a witty or sarcastic remark. I over-overthink everything and I am always going to be calm and calculating. I always try to be as efficient and helpful as I can be. I'm always there for people unless I have work or school. Either you want to be with me or you don't. Either you care or you don't. I'm not your plaything. At the time of initially saying you want to be with me, that is understood that you know how I am and that you're serious. I won't wait around for you while you're deciding between me or another option. Just let me know, so I can drop you from my life and move on.
Turn off #4: Partying, Drinking, doing drugs and Smoking. Now, this is personal. I understand that people enjoy it, I don't. And I'm not saying I'm against people doing it! Go, have fun! Just, personally, I don't like it.
Turn off #5: Social Media Whoring. The way some people socialize by adding anybody and everyone on Facebook when they say hi to them.... It's a constant stream of guys flowing through their life. From the outside, I don't need to deal with that. That is way too risky. And that's not even taking into account jealousy or paranoia of cheating. That's just straight up suspect. They're so used to flirting with or talking to, whatever is done with them, that I'm supposed to accept that she won't continue it through any possible dating stage that happens? Suddenly, they'll just flip a switch and settle down with one person? It's not worth it. I date one person at a time. They talk to at least 6 people at once, weighing their options while in the situation. I'm not saying what they do is bad or gross or that they're whores, I'm just saying that what they do, and what people like them do, isn't for me. I don't like that approach.
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@allischaaff Oh no, a smoker! ;p Kidding. It is the smell and taste that the cigarettes (and weed) leave behind, but those are the only reasons I dislike it. It's your body and I believe you have the right to do whatever you want with it haha And why blush?!? Haha /.\ Nooo!! Because that'll make me blush! 馃構 And thank you for your kind words and approval! I'm glad my thoughts are agreeable!
2 years agoReply
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@Arellano1052 Ahhhh!!! Sorry sorry no blushing!!! lol XD Well I appreciate your respect for my bad choices lol. The only reason I don't feel too bad about smoking now is that I have my quit date on the calendar 鈥撀爐he end of November!! I'm moving, so that gives me a good concrete time to say "Okay, this is the last one. EVER." Lol. I have faith in myself, because I usually have a lot of self-control about these things. I'm interested to see how hard it'll be, though. @MissB82 Yes yes YASSS girl. You're very wise. I feel the same way about those guys 鈥撀爉y heart hurts for them because I know they'll continue down their same path of bad choices and self-destructive behaviors, while I'm lucky enough to have broken that cycle quite a long time ago. I owe so much to my parents being really pro-mental health and sending me to a therapist any time I was feeling particularly stressed lol. Anyway, we'll keep expecting respect, decency, & accountability from our partners, and find the right ones in the end :) I truly believe it's every individual's responsibility to take care of their mental and emotional health, and work out those deeper problems before they commit to a partnership with another individual. When I find somebody who believes the same thing, then I'll know it's right :)
2 years agoReply
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You seem like a really great guy馃槉 like you have your priorities in check, you know what you want and you won't settle for anything less.... I like that馃槉
2 years agoReply
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/.\ I thank you for your kind words, @MichelleHolly haha (.-. ) I still have quite a bit to improve on, but approval of my mentality just means I'm heading down the correct path.... And being only 20, I do have a bit of time figure stuff out. So thank you for the indirect encouragement as well =) ^.^
2 years agoReply
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@Arellano1052 No problem!! I love encouraging people and when there's young* people nowadays like this, we need to encourage them. Hopefully people learn to be more like people like you馃槉 *I say young yet I'm younger than you lol馃槃
2 years agoReply
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