3 years ago10,000+ Views

It's hard enough when we have other people hating on us. What happens when we can't stop hating on ourselves?

People say you can't take responsibility for yourself if you pass blame on to others. For fear of looking irresponsible or blatantly ignorant, most of us take blame internally, mostly for things we can't control. How many times have you been faced with a situation that was futile from the start, and just ended up hating on yourself instead?
Like, when you fail a test, you should blame yourself because you didn't study right?
But when you break up with someone, who is clearly not good for you, you end up blaming yourself.
We take blame and hate on ourselves for all kinds of things that are out of our control. We hate on ourselves.
We hate our bodies.
We hate our minds.
We hate our friends.
We hate our enemies.
We hate our nails.
We hate our hair.
We hate our skin.
We hate our careers.
We hate on just about everything that has to do with ourselves, because honestly: we feel like we're guilty.
Guilty of not being pretty enough, or smart enough, or just not being enough in general. Our guilt for living below some impossible standard we've made up in our heads propels us to hate on ourselves.
How do we stop doing this you may ask?

We have to gain a little perspective.

Honestly, sit down and look at yourself, without judgement, as anyone else on the planet would look at you.
Evaluate yourself logically, and see where you stand. Try and detach yourself, I guarantee you you're doing way better than you think you are. Your hair is probably just fine. And your mind is probably brilliant. Your body is probably wonderful and your heart is probably big.
Ask yourself these questions, and answer honestly:
1. Am I happy?
2. Am I doing what I want to do?
3. Am I healthy?
4. Am I doing my best?
5. Do I have a plan?
6. Do I care?
Based on your answers, and the objectivity involved you'll probably discover that you're doing just fine. Things will be okay. If you're working hard, and trying to do better, you're fine.
Just keep moving.

It's one thing to push yourself, but it's another thing to hate on yourself for the sake of motivation.

@WiviDemol as I was writing this I was like, "Can I even take my own advice?" :/ it's really hard, and we're not going to fix it overnight.
self loathing is an inherent trait...those we think have no doubt , have doubt, those we think have no pain, have pain, those we think are true, are false, those we think have power, are powerless and on and on..but the one who has all the talents, power and strength iin the world is the one who looks back at you in the mirror every day. the key is accepting, encouraging, and loving the one in the mirror. have a great day..even when you know it will suck.
wow my answer is no to all of those questions. lol thats sad.
@TessStevens yes it's really hard. Been trying for years
yeah, you are better than you are.
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