A Western Australian man was arrested earlier this week after rifling through a stranger's car, stealing their Hungry Jack's cheeseburger, taking off all of their clothes, and fleeing from the scene of the crime.
In slightly unrelated but still relevant news, I suddenly realized I have a dating type.
Local police say the man forced his way into a parked vehicle and took the Hungry Jack's Whopper burger, which had been purchased to bring to the vehicle owner's friend who lived roughly 1,700km (1,055 miles) away.
Yes, to add to the previous lunacy, this burger was supposed to go on a plane and travel across the country before it was stolen by a hungry, enigmatic naked dude. (Nothing says 'Bros for life.' quite like a friend who delivers cross-country fast food.)
When the owner returned to his car, only to find a random dude trying to peace out with his burger, he tried his best to confront him, only to have aforementioned random dude take off all his clothes and run away.
Of course, when you're streaking through a public area, you're only going to be able to get so far without making a huge scene, and it wasn't long before he was detained and charged with stealing and disorderly conduct.
I have several questions, so this is going to be a hard card to wrap up. If any of you can answer these, please feel free: