2 years ago500+ Views

Third card in the {G} Series. Let's gooooo!

Kabukichou's Most Eligible Bachelor.

If Gintama has taught us anything, it's that nothing spouts truth like the cold hard facts of a character popularity poll, and if popularity polls have anything to say about women's horrible taste in men, then Gintoki is a testament to that. Turns out guys, you really don't have to work that hard to impress the ladies. Just be a jobless, naturally-permed, nose-picking freeloader, because according to Recochoku's annual poll, our beloved Gin-san is the #1 anime character girls want to marry (knocking that equally unworthy arsehole Hibari from his #1 spot, what now Hibari, WHAT NOW! You think tonfa or that pet crapping on your head all the time made you special?! GINTOKI'S GOT THOSE TOO!)
1st place -Sakata Gintoki from Gintama
2nd place -Roronoa Zoro from One Piece
3rd place -Kudou Shinichi from Detective Conan
4th place -Hijikata Toshirou from Gintama
5th place -Hibari Kyouya from Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
But Gin-san isn't someone that only IRL girls are squealing over and beating each other up at cons for. (No personal experience here, I never shoved that cosplayer to get the last Gintama blind box! And it definitely wasn't because she was dressed as some Cosmic Era Gundam character!!) Gintoki is quite popular within Gintama as well. Whether or not he wants the attention, Gintoki manages to seduce the other female characters with his good looks charming personality occasional chivalrous nature and willingness to help others. I wouldn't exactly call Gintoki anything close to romantic, but I do believe that he has that "knight in shining armor" quality to him every so often.
"Look at this weather: spring showers, fall showers, rain of blood... I'm willing to stand in any of those. But..I'm done standing in a girl's tears."
--Sakata Gintoki, Episode 196
Unfortunately for Gin-san, the Kabukichou damsels in distress are no princesses--they're more like mountain gorillas. He's subjected to physical and verbal abuse everytime he spits out one of Otae's "dark matter" fried eggs, (accidentally) cops a feel of Tsukuyo, or gets involved in some unwarranted S&M play with Sa-chan. Gintoki can't even catch a break in the virtual world--whereas Shinpachi, and even Kondou, can get a cute, princess-like girlfriend in the love simulation game, Love Choris, Gintoki ends up with a nasty old hag. Because of his low luck with women, it's no wonder that Gintoki seems to be content with simply admiring the weather girl Ketsuno Ana from afar.
That isn't to say that the ladies don't have something for our beloved Yorozuya, however. Shimura Tae, Shinpachi's beloved big sister, is the one who initially encourages Shinpachi to follow in Gintoki's path if it's what he wishes to do. (A choice I'm sure she laments over late rin the series.) She seems to play the occasional "damsel in distress" role, for which Gintoki & Co. will always come to her rescue: whether it's being kidnapped by aliens or crossdressers, stalked by admirers, or simply capturing the village panty thief. Otae and Gintoki occasionally share a few tender moments. When Gintoki comes back injured during the Benizakura Arc, Tae tends to his wounds and watches over him as he rests, asking him to stop being so reckless. However, knowing that Gintoki will go out to save Shinpachi and Kagura even if he's wounded, she leaves his clothes folded neatly by the door, along with an umbrella to use in the rain.
"This is my favorite umbrella. Make sure you bring it back in one piece."
--Shimura Tae, Shinyaku Benizakura-hen
At one point, Otae openly admits that she finds herself attracted to Gintoki, but during a point in the story at which Gintoki had amnesia--causing his pupils to be slightly larger, thus, more attractive. Gintoki's stalker Sarutobi Ayame, however, would take Gintoki in any form: actual Gin-san, blow-up doll Gin-san, dating game modified to look like Gin-san Gin-san. Most of their relationship exists only in her delusional fantasies, as Gintoki openly displays his disgust and extreme aversion to her, but that doesn't stop her from being the most fanatical Gintoki admirer in Kabukichou. After falling for Gintoki (literally, through his roof) she attempts to trick him into thinking he had an inappropriate relationship with her, which Gintoki plays along with knowing she simply wants his help. Though her obsessive behavior exasperates him to no end, Sa-chan kind of has extreme masochistic tendencies, which means any berating that Gintoki does simply makes her love him more. On the other hand, his relationship with Sa-chan is also a testament to his willingless to help anyone and anything--even his stalker--if only as a means of getting her away from him.
"When I'm with you my resolve weakens. Don't shake up my feelings any further."
Another such character would be Tsukuyo--a character that Gintoki fangirls seem to either love or hate, and not too surprising since Gintoki has (unintentionally) copped a feel more than once (and paid the price for it). Due to the fact that Tsukuyo has violent tendencies when it comes to Gintoki (what woman doesn't in this series?), Gintoki gets visibly uncomfortable whenever she's around and seems to fear a swift kick to the nads more than anything else. On the other hand, the two of them also share traits which help them find a meeting point: both have suffered traumatic experiences with their former teachers, and also willingly hide their problems in order to shoulder the burdens of others. When Tsukuyo's teacher Jiraia wreaks havoc upon her home in Yoshiwara, Gintoki becomes extremely protective of Tsukuyo, coming to her rescue and fighting to protect her and everything that she cares about. He's also unwillingly picked to help cheer her up when she's down, and ever the "odd jobs", manages to comfort her and bring her to peace a few broken alcohol bottles later. Whether or not Gintoki actually shows any interest for these terrible excuses for women is up in the air, but when all else fails all men certainly have this to keep them company during those dry spells.
:D :D I only read the beginning of this for now until I get started but fear not! I will read it all!