2 years ago
natsulover17
in English 1,180 Views
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Please Read!!馃檹馃徎馃檹馃徎
So hey, I'm a novice at writing at the moment but I'd like to get my creation out there. Now, I know this could be weird and everything but I'm not very PG13 on expressing the characters feelings, thoughts or actions so please bear this in mind. Again I really want people to read it and get comments on it because nobody but one person does comment. I'm not really afraid of being critiqued and I accept everyone's opinion so don't feel shy or anything like that. So thanks for reading this over.馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉
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Thanks. I'm on Part 12 now. There are grammatic errors and some issues with punctuation and sentence structure. The comments I'm making are simply writing suggestions to make the flow of the story clearer. The great thing is that you are writing all the time. I really like the fact that you tackle difficult issues. As for writing dialogue, here is an example from your story. "Now THIS is a way to travel.", Ok. Do more describing instead of telling. I will rewrite the sentence. "Now this is a way to travel." You do not need the comma after the quotation mark and no need to emphasize words using all caps. You have strong characters, so there isn't a need for it. I hope this is helpful. I don't want to seem critical.
2 years agoReply
No it's perfectly fine. I'll definitely look into it. Thanks so much again.馃槉馃槉馃槉馃槉
2 years agoReply
I'm enjoying it.
2 years agoReply
I'm so glad to hear that!! Since nobody really comments I don't know if they are enjoying it or not.
2 years agoReply
@natsulover17 That's why I have so many questions. I really get absorbed in the story when I read.
2 years agoReply
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