2 years ago1,000+ Views
Once you start going down the road of thinking about his ex (you know, that girl he dated for years before he met you?), it's hard to backpedal.
I mean, how can you, the new girl, even fathom it? He was in love with someone before you. Things between you two are so amazing that an idea like that doesn't even compute.
He was in love with someone else?
And then, after the nausea starts to take hold, the insecurities begin to creep up.
What if he liked her better than me?
What if she was better for him than I am?
What if she tries to get him back? What then?
These thoughts are toxic. And if you give them an inch, they will take over your mind and make you feel worried, anxious, insecure, and unworthy.
She's not better than you.
Get that through your mind. First things first: if he wanted to be with her, he wouldn't have broken up with her. And he wouldn't have started dating you.
Maybe he did have feelings for someone else before you came along. But didn't you, too? We meet and fall in love with so many people in this life. It's not a crime, on either of your parts, to have been with somebody else.
You are amazing. And beautiful. And unique and special and everything he wants. Stop worrying about that other girl; she's fading into the past now. Your insecurities and jealousies are all that's keeping her alive.
@AlloBaber First thing, let me say that I didn't intend on my comment to hurt your feelings. It was based on something I went through where an ex broke up with me over those same feelings, and nothing I did could change it. And the woman who she was comparing herself to, had dumped me unmercifully, and got married less than a year later. Not trying to say your feelings are silly, and I do apologise if that's how it came off.
:( @ThePervySage I wrote this based on my real feelings, so your comment was a little hurtful... All I can offer is that sometimes people aren't pure logic. There are emotions at play too. And how we feel doesn't always make sense. However you need to think about it to make yourself realize it's not a big deal, do that. You personally might not struggle with this, but I know I have. And I was just hoping to help those who do...
I don't know why anyone would even think about this. They broke up for a reason. The only time it should be a concern is if he's showing signs that he's not over his ex.