2 years ago1,000+ Views
Hey again, this question is from a friend of mine who's been out of a relationship for a good 2 months now, having dated the guy for 10 months. They broke up not on good terms and she's a little upset about how things turned out.
Here's her question:
"I've been doing all the things that I'm supposed to as a single person! I've been a lot of things to help: crying from time to time, and spending time just being sad. But also being really productive in my life, and going out and doing things with my friends. But I STILL can't get over him. I know it was a bad relationship and we weren't meant to be, but I can't stop thinking about him all the time, wondering how he's doing, and still asking "what if"... How do I get over this?!"

Help my friend out?!

Not trying to be cold, but time, time, time and more time. Two months is no time at all. A 10 month relationship is still pretty fresh. So she must have really been into him. There's no magic button or single great piece of advice for this. It takes time to learn how to live your life without someone you've grown attached to being in it. She will get over it and move on, but she has to find what it is for her to be able to do that. So what she is doing right now, she needs to keep doing it. And you need to keep being a great friend looking out for her.
@nicolejb Feelings just can't stop. I have to cosign what @MaighdlinS said about learning to love being by yourself.
Ohhh that's a cool idea @MaighdlinS! :) I worry thought she might be lonely doing some soul searching on her own... maybe a friend trip? Yeah, that's kinda what I was thinking too @ThePervySage, the problem is I think she's really set on stopping the feelings NOW. lol. And having a hard time understanding that it will take time.
I know that feeling. It sucks, I know, but in due time, all of the productiveness and work will pay off and you'll be looking at this like "Why was I even hooked?" but I understand that it's difficult. Don't beat yourself up for not being able to get over him. It's a long and drawn out process. It just takes a minute. Hope this helped a bit!
honey, I have been where you are now and I can honestly say it's better to move on and wonder; what if then to go for it another time & be miserable.
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