I was walking through Nordstrom yesterday in pursuit of a great pair of shoes. I've been obsessed with single soled, well-made shoes for the past month, and no designer strikes my fancy more than Manolo Blahnik.
Timeless, sexy and utterly fantastic, these shoes have been like an urban myth to me. I couldn't imagine owning a pair, for fear that they'd change me completely, into the person I knew I should become.
I walked in wearing a casual mix of high end and low end things in order to make sure that the sales ladies didn't pretty-woman me if I wanted to try on a pair.
A stylish jean jacket with a Chanel patch, Chanel necklace, Louis Vuitton Purse and some 20 dollar jeans, a T shirt and some stylish booties that have made their paces through three cities and two countries in the past year, were the elements of the outfit. Indie rock chic.
There is nothing like seeing a beautiful pair of shoes. For some, they're like art, as most fashion is. For me, the clothes and shoes that require a lot of effort and expense are usually worth it. There's a reason they're "designer" because, they're unique and beautiful. And beautiful things make me happy. Fashion is a game changer, shoes in particular.
They can change your mood instantly. They change the way you walk, the way you carry yourself. If you don't believe this, try on a pair of 600 dollar shoes, and then talk to me.
So I walked past the Valentinos and the Manolo Blahniks and the Saint Laurents. The beautifully made shoes that fly off the shelves and into the hands of well-to-do, or well-to-spend people of all ages, colors and shapes. Though your body goes through changes, your shoe size is always the same...a comforting thing to many shoppers, who hate the thought of another thing not fitting correctly.
At 6PM on a Sunday you couldn't find another place where there were more women giddy with excitement, dozens of designer shoe boxes on the floor around them, and for a second there I smiled, imagining the day that I could afford a brand new pair.
But this weekend I stepped out in the most expensive shoes I have ever owned: A pair of d'orsay (which means they're "side less", and a bit harder to walk in), sling back Manolo Blahnik pumps in the Carolyne style. Classic, classy and neutral they are the perfect adult shoe. The perfect shoe for a young woman trying to find herself.
I bought them after a long battle with myself: either, I get these shoes or I spend the money on something frivolous that I'll probably forget about, drinks, dinner. No. These have to be in my closet.
It sounds shallow and useless doesn't it? But to all of you shoe-shamers out there, listen up: You all have that one thing you spend money on. That one thing that makes you feel incredible. It could be makeup, music, concerts, experiences, whatever. But for me...its shoes.
Sometimes when you're really proud of an outfit, you take a lot of pictures, because you know what, you look great! And you want everyone to see that. So designer shoes and bag in hand, I went out to dinner with a friend. A normal Friday night that became extraordinary, because of the shoes.
I strutted like a model down the streets of any-town, California and it felt great. My confidence was up, my posture was perfect and people took notice. It's mood altering, when you can find something that really shows off how amazing you can be. Shoes are that thing for me.
When I'm walking around in my Chuck Taylor's I feel like myself, low key, rock and roll, edgy and indifferent. I'm aloof and extraordinary, but sometimes that's not enough.
When I put on those designer pumps...I changed. My demeanor was lifted, my posture improved. I was happier. I felt like the fully actualized version of myself. The shoe gods smiled upon me and gave me the confidence to leave the house, and look amazing doing it.
There's nothing wrong with that right?
Some may call me materialistic, but I don't think about it like that. If you take the time, effort and energy to save up for a brilliant pair of shoes...it's an investment! They last forever, they're timeless and trend-less and ultimately you can change the way you feel. How is that different from using people to boost your self-esteem?
I think the latter is a little worse to be honest.