I'm going up to San Francisco tomorrow to see OneRepublic's free, live, SuperBowl concert. I'm excited. I've been a fan of this band for a long time. I've always appreciated the musicianship and innovative songwriting of this group. And even though a lot of musicians have written them off as pop fodder, I've always seen past that.
I'm sure you remember "All The Right Moves", it's catchy as hell and has an even better message. Let me explain.
We all have this bad habit where we compare ourselves to other people. We decide that we're not worth much, and we look to people who we believe are worth more, and we gravitate to them. We feel jealousy when we have no reason to.
Due to the strange culture of social media, we're in a constant state of keeping up with people we've never met. Instagram is full of rich kids who flaunt their cars and designer clothes. Facebook pits us against our own friends, and what's worse is that we believe in it. We try to prove ourselves. We put up pictures of things we buy. We post photos with people who make us look better. We share things we write or post on other sites in an attempt to make our lives look shiny and perfect.
We want to look like we have "All The Right Moves" in life. In an attempt to keep up with the expectations of everyone we know, we often lose what makes us unique.
Finding yourself is not an easy task, and I think that's why this song connected with me at a young age. I always wanted something I didn't have. I always wanted to look differently and act differently than came natural, and for some reason those feelings still exist today.
I was looking at a picture of one of my favorite models, Kate Moss, the other day, and I literally had the thought: "If I looked like her I would be happy."
And I stopped myself, because you know what, I wouldn't be. I'm not sure a huge physical transformation could change the feelings I have. I'm discovering, slowly but surely, and with the help of close friends, that it's a mental thing. I'm currently losing weight, and working on healthier habits, but why? To be skinnier? To look more acceptable to society? I don't know.
But until I stop trying to keep up with everyone, I won't change.
I have to change for myself.