Okay, so, this explanation part as to what made me think about this may come off a little (or a lot) conceited but I'm seriously not trying to come off that way. My grandmother has this full-length mirror type clock and I have this dress that I bought not too long ago, around Christmas time actually of this past December. I didn't know it was as...well, fitting, as it is because I didn't get the chance to try it on in the store. Anyway, I wore it today and I walked past that mirror-slash-clock. I was just curious about how I looked in it because I've apparently been losing weight these past couple of months or so, to the point where I'm down about two sizes or so? Maybe more? I'm not sure. I can't even remember the last time I weighed myself. Don't congratulate me though. It's not exactly through a healthy method. I don't have an eating disorder but that's not the topic here. I was looking at my reflection in the mirror and I turned sideways. The funny thing is what I thought when I did so. I was wondering if I have an S-line now. I do. At least in this dress. Don't judge me. It makes me happy. And not necessarily for a good reason...
Okay, for those of you that don't know, that's the pretty simple definition/description of an S-line. Now, the reason I even started paying attention to whether or not I have one is honestly due to my biases in kpop. We all know what it's like, at least in my opinion. You start to like that one individual, who gradually turns into your bias. You don't think anything of it at first but, then it happens! You get in too deep and you start to wonder and let your imagination play about whether or not you'd be a good match. And then you find yourself doing it.
Looking up their ideal type.
I'm not saying everyone does it, but I feel like it does come up in our thoughts. Heck! We even start to think of if our biases fits the ideals we have for our own ideal type.
That's what got me thinking: When does it become too much?
I'm sure we've seen the posts here and there on the web or some SNS/social media venue where we're told we should be ourselves. You know, the ones that talk about how you shouldn't change things about yourself just to please someone else? But what if it could be good for you? What if hearing that your bias' ideal type was someone that smiled all the time? The thing is that finding that out may make you smile more, even if it's subconsciously. But smiling more is good for you and for those around you. Smiling, as odd as it may seem, literally does force you to feel happier if you do it when you want to cry or get angry. And I don't mean that forced smile where you're actually gritting your teeth more than anything else. In referring to simply clearing your head and just putting on a smile, letting whatever that feeling is go. It could cause a butterfly effect to be honest and change so much in your life, even if it's just internal emotions and thoughts. What if your bias' ideal type was more positive than anything else and didn't make you feel like you didn't have a chance? On the other hand... What if it could almost destroy you just as easily as the same words could make you a better person?
If you haven't run into a person that's willing to change everything about themselves to please someone else, no matter how long, odds are you'll run into them at some point. I don't judge people like that because they have their own reasons for the things they do. On the other hand, I don't commend that type of behavior. It's one thing to do it for family, like granting someone's dying wish or cheering up a sad friend. Doing something you're not accustomed to doing in those types of scenarios wouldn't fit what I'm referring to. I'm talking about gradually becoming a different person in the sense that it's hard for people to even recognize who you are, all because of changes in your personality. Can you see how this can be bad and good? I wanted to have an S-line because that was a part of one of my bias' lists for their ideal type. I also thought it'd just be nice to have in general because it's a unique body type and it's not necessarily easy to have one because of the needed body balance. No, I don't intend to go out and have plastic surgery or anything but, the thing is, there are people that would just to meet a criteria like that. In all honesty, it was more like a bright yellow sticky note in the back of my mind that popped up once in a while, telling me that I could have one if I lost some more weight. If I put in the effort to get the results, but not to the point of putting myself in harm's way or anything. I personally believe it's all about perspective. What one may take as a positive kick to the rear, another may jump the gun and forget themselves in the run to win someone over. I'm just kind of ranting. I apologize. I'm not really sure who to tag but I'll tag @kpopandkimchi since that's who tags me in a good amount of discussion type cards. ♡ I'm just spreading my thoughts. If you guys have any, feel free to comment. Thank you for reading! ♡