You wanted to say you smiled everyday in the past 6 months. You wanted to say that you were fine about leaving Mark. You wanted to prove to yourself and everyone that it didn’t hurt as much as it let on to be. But you would be lying. It hurt a lot. Leaving a piece of your heart with someone hurts a lot. A lot of time is needed until your heart heals up, until you’re ready to move on and breath again. So that’s what tonight is suppose to be, tonight is suppose to be your revival. To say to the world that you’re single, and ready to finally mingle again. The club scene really hasn’t changed much despite your 6 months confinement. It was like you hoped that the assholes would be swapped out for gentlemen, but once again, that seemed highly unlikely. The loud music blasted towards your eardrums as the mindless bodies moved around no the dance floor. Bodies grinding, lips smashing, smiles, small talk, dirty talk, sweet talk, compliments, touches. The club scene hasn’t changed at all. “I see you finally made it out?” Your friend, and clubbing buddy pulls up next to you at the bar, signalling the bartender to send him another shot of whatever ghastly drink he has chosen to consume tonight. “You’ve been waiting?” You lean your head back and lock gazes with him and a smirk flashes across his lips. “I’m the great Jackson, I don’t wait for girls,” he takes the small shot glasses and downs the liquid before turning back to you. “So, dance?” He raises his hand, palm up in front of you. You thought through the consequences of agreeing to him, but it was time, your heart should be ready for this.You reached out your hand and placed it on top of his. Jackson smiled and wrapped his fingers around yours as he pulled you into the middle of the dance floor. Mark never liked the club, and that’s one of the reasons you decide to come here. Next to zero chance of finding him in here. He hated loud music, he hated alcohol, and most of all he hated men, like Jackson who scout and hunt. Your body started to move along with Jackson. You can’t deny it though, the boy knows how to move. He has your body pinned tightly against his, one of his arm around your hip making it impossible for you to move away. Your body starts to sway and grind against Jackson, his arousal already very apparent. His lips attached to the piece of skin around your neck, sucking, biting leaving his mark. You pulled his face away from your neck and linked your lips together. The kiss was different to the ones you are used to. Mark always kissed you tenderly, no rush, not a lot of passion. Gentle, soft pecks here and there. He get playful once he has teased you enough and that’s how you liked your kisses. Jackson was all tongue and roughly play. His tongue invaded your mouth without any permission and his hand wounded rather roughly into your hair.“NO!” Your eyes suddenly shot open as you thought your herd Mark’s voice in the crowd. Which as strange, because the club was clearly filled with noise and so to be able to hear his voice so loudly, it scared you almost. You kept kissing Jackson though, trying to bury out the voice. “NO!” There is was again, and you couldn’t deny that it was definitely Mark and you could definitely hear him. You shoved Jackson off you and he shot you a very confused look. You pulled your dress down a little and told him 5 minutes as you walked towards the exit. Jackson didn’t wait and wouldn’t wait for you return as another girl was easily within in arms once you left. You looked around the club as you were heading though, no sign of Mark so who’s voice was that?The evening air wasn’t too cold, but you still put your jumper on. You sat on the stone ledge as you took a few deep breathes in and out. Getting back into this scene was hard, especially since you now know you’re heart still isn’t ready. But it will never really be ready, you’ll always have a space for Mark in your heart. In that moment you just hoped he was happy with Raina and that he didn’t long for you. A man dressed in all black stumbled out of the club. He was drunk, very drunk, not even able to stand up or walk straight. He falls against the ledge next to you and vomits directly into the bushes behind you. You push yourself aside a little and the man sits down. He doesn’t say anything, he just sits there and hiccups a few times. He grabs a napkin out of his jacket pocket and wipes his lips before throwing up once again into the garden. You looked around and wondered if this guy had any friends to look after him. Suddenly the man’s head drops and rests against your shoulder. Out of shock and pure self-defence, you shove him rather hard causing him to fall on the ground. “AWWWW!” You recognised that voice. The man rubbed his head a few times before sitting up on the ground, his hair hiding his face. You knelt down before the man and brushed your finger across his fringe. It couldn’t be right? “Mark?” He smiled and hiccuped once more before falling asleep on the pavement. -You dragged his heavy body across the wooden floors of his, or what was your shared apartment. Why are you so weak for him? You could’ve just left him there, you could’ve just let someone else discover him and sort him out. You would’ve just not cared. But your weak weak heart couldn’t do it, seeing him, despite the drunk state, your heart still raced like crazy. You missed his face, his smile, his hugs, his smell, you missed everything. In that moment, you gave in and now here you are. You dropped his heavy body on the bed and rolled him over to one side, removing his thick outer jacket. Undoing his buttons one at a time, you took his dress shirt off leaving him just in his white wife beater. You pulled his pants off and took his socks off. You pulled the blanket over his body and watched as Mark continued to sleep. You sat on the edge of the bed and watched as Mark slept. His even breathes matched the up and down heaves of his chest. You couldn’t resist running a finger down his face, so you did. You knew you shouldn’t be here, you knew that Raina was probably looking for him, you knew this was wrong. You blamed your heart, you and your weak heart. After a long sigh, you moved from the bed and headed for the door. “Please don’t leave.” Mark’s eyes shot open and you weren’t sure whether it was the alcohol talking or him. “Why were you at the club, you hate clubs.” You stood by the door as Mark placed a hand above his forehead. “You don’t. You always went to clubs when you were upset or stressed. I wanted to test my luck.” Mark rubbed his forehead with his index and thumb before making a granting noise.“Raina not good enough for you, that you have to come looking for me instead?” Your words were harsh, only because you were still quite hurt from what happened. Although it wasn’t really his fault, you were the one that let him go, but knowing that he didn’t even try to fight for you, hurt. “No because Raina was a mistake, and letting you walk out that door that day was a mistake.” Mark sat up this time, he placed a pillow behind him and sat up. He patted the spot on the bed and looked towards you. You crossed your arm, making no action to do what he was urging you to. “Goodbye Mark.” You reached for the door knob.“I get it, you have Jackson now. I’m sorry, I should’ve known.” Mark turned towards the window and you stopped in your steps. You took a deep breath in, “this isn’t fair, do you know how hard it was to let you go, and you expect a few small words from you, a little sweet talk will win me back? I’m not with Jackson, if you knew who Jackson was, you would know that I was only hooking up with him to forget you.”“I know, I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I know that I should’ve fought for you and not stray towards Raina so easily. All she wanted in the end was a one night stand, nothing more, she wanted to give me happiness, but only for one night. You were willing to give me happiness forever. I swapped something eternal for something temporary, I’m the idiot. So I deserve this.” Mark looked towards you, trying to read your face. You were trying to process all of what he had just said in that short moment. What does this all mean? Do you just go back now, to the way it was? Do you just forget about the heartache he has caused you for the last 6 months and carry on like that never happened? “That’s a lot to process, I think I’ll just need some time to process it all.”“Can you process it with me? Please?” There was a deep sincerity to his word and you knew the minute you stepped into the apartment, it would be hard for you to leave. There was too many memories here, too many things here that you still loved and adored. So your heart softened once again. You mentally slapped yourself for giving in so easily. It wasn’t until you were taking your clothes off and climbing into Mark’s embrace, did you realise there was no turning back now. Your body still moulded against his so perfectly. He still smelt of the perfume you brought him for his birthday and it made you smile. Unknowingly, you both drifted off into a deep sleep.-The first thing you felt were soft kisses against your shoulder blade. It wasn’t the first time you’ve dreamed of Mark. He often appeared in your dreams in the last few months. You smiled as his finger turned your face and his lips finally landed on yours. You turned your body and Mark rested his on top of yours. The kisses were sweet and soft, your favourite. You smiled into the smile just as Mark smiled too. If only this wasn’t a dream you thought if only. Your eyes shot open. This isn’t a dream, this is reality, this is, this is. “What are you doing?” You pushed Mark off your body and his head hit the window ledge and he curled over in pain. “I’m so sorry.” You wounded your arm around his head trying to rub the spot where his head collided with the ledge. Mark laughed and your heart raced, you had missed that sound. Mark took advantage of your dazed state and launched at you again, pinning you down on the bed. He traced kisses down your neck and you shamelessly moaned at his gestures. You covered your face with you hand, making Mark extremely confused. “What are you doing?" "What are we doing? What is this, what are we? Why am I still here, gosh I’m so weak, I should’t have stayed over I-”“Still over thinking everything?” Mark pulled your hand away from your face and you saw that angelic smile of his. You stared at that little black mole just above his lip that you absolutely adored. Unknowingly, you pulled his face towards yours and planted a kiss against that spot. “I should go.” But your body made no movements to match your words. “Don’t go, stay with me, come back to me. I can make this work, I promise.” There was a certain sense of sincerity in Mark’s words that made you weak in the knees. If you were standing up when he said this, you were sure you would’ve fallen over. “How? How do I know that what happened last time won’t happen again?” Mark pulled away and his eyes darted between yours. “Because, you’re not the one that’s going to make me happy. It didn’t work last time because you were the only one playing. This time I’m playing too. This time, let me be the source of your happiness." You squealed inwardly at his words. That’s all your ever wanted from him honestly. "It’s not going to be easy, I’m not going to go easy on you." "I know, but I finally got you back, and I’m going to work hard so that you’ll never ever leave me again.” You adored him so much, you didn’t know what to say in that moment because you felt like no words could really describe what was happening inside. So you just smiled and pulled Mark closer, holding and hugging him as close to you as possible. Mark held on to you too, with the same amount of desperation and want. Here’s to second chances. Here’s to finding that small piece of your heart and joining it back all together as one.
And here is part 2. I guess im real weak to cause I would have given in to him to. I mean who wouldn't that smile is so cute!