Members: Jimin; Reader(You); OC child; Minor appearances from other members.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8
Summary: It was a cycle of shutting out and being shut out. Whether Jimin realized it or not, he was the one who had started it so it was only right that he end it
His hands grasped onto your upper arms, chest brushing against your forearms as he tried to draw you into his embrace,”Jagi, I-” You jerked away, and he calmly stepped back. Shifting Iseul to a more comfortable position, you forced yourself to calm down by taking a deep breath. All this could be solved in a calm manner, you assured yourself.
“Don’t even start that, Park Jimin.” You warned steadily, “You put yourself in this position. I’m not going to let you dance in and out of Iseul’s life like that. Either you’re fully committed or you’re not.” That seemed like the best way to state your intentions.
Jimin had gotten special treatment from you for too long. It wasn’t fair to make Iseul live by a special set of rules when it came to her father and his involvement. In the past you had thought it would’ve worked, but now actually raising Iseul, you knew that parenting was full time. The baby cooed softly in your arms, her wide eyes focused on Jimin. He found himself dumbly staring back at you, unable to meet his daughter’s innocent stare,
“Just..just give me some time to think..” he pleaded softly. He just needed a little more time to think about this. To think on how to tell everyone.
You turned away, Iseul’s eyes still trailing over Jimin’s pained expression. ”You’ve had months Jimin. Months.” If he was really this serious, everyone would have known by now. He was just stalling time and shirking commitment. The baby was set into her playpen. “What exactly did you expect to get coming here that night, threatening your way in?” You asked quietly, changing Iseul’s diaper,” You saw her, but you still came back..what do you want Jimin?”
He shoved his hands into his pockets nervously, “I don’t know.” He admitted lowly, “I don’t know what I want…I just knew that it was wrong for me to know about Iseul and pretend that I didn’t. Honestly, I just wanted to see that she existed with my own two eyes and then be done with it. It seemed so much more simple in my head; see her and then continue on with my life..” Jimin shifted nervously, “And then I saw her; I really saw her, not what I imagined she looked like. I saw her in the flesh and she smiled at me…and I..” He bit his lip, “I couldn’t just ignore her for the rest of her life like that. As much as I wanted to abandon her..I tried so hard to, Y/N, you don’t understand.” His shoulder slouched, “I tried to forget she existed to make my life easier, but I couldn’t stop thinking about her…so I came back and…I’m here.”
You set aside the soiled diaper, helping your daughter sit up, “So you have no idea what you’re doing.” you summarized.
“I don’t.” He relented. “I just know I can’t abandon her and that no one else can know about her yet.”
Jimin flinched, “Wait, Y-”
“Get out!” You snapped, startling the baby. Her eyes widened in fear and she began to cry softly, raising her hands to be held. You distractedly patted her back, glaring over your shoulder at Jimin, “I said get out! You’re not a father you’re just some self absorbed shit who only thinks of himself!”
Jimin nodded somberly, stepping towards the door, “But haven’t you done the same thing?”
Your hands dropped to your sides, “What did you just say?”
“You’re mad at me for being a self absorbed shit,” He repeated slowly, “But aren’t you the same thing? You’ve been coddling me just as much as I’ve been coddling myself, Y/N.” His brows drew down sharply,”I’m conflicted about being a father to Iseul- this is all brand new to me! A few months ago, I didn’t even know she existed! I didn’t have months and months to come to terms with this and prepare like you did. I’m scared, Y/N!! And instead of trying to work through this with me and reassure me, you’re telling me to screw off! What are you thinking, that things would be easier for you with me gone? What about Iseul? Will things be easier for her? Justify that bullshit, Y/N! Because I really wanna know!”
“I’ve been relying on you to help me.” He growled, red faced and burning with anger,”I’m terrified Y/N…this isn’t a game or a pet, this is our daughter we’re talking about. This is her entire future. I can’t just flip a switch and suddenly be the world’s best father. I’m lost and confused and you..You’re only thinking of how you feel.” He rubbed at his face in frustration, sighing heavily.
You sighed softly,”I know you Jimin. I know what you’re like, how you react to things. I know that if I let you in…you’re just going to walk back out later on. So yes, I’m selfish for not wanting Iseul to go through that. I’m sorry I’m not holding your hand each step of the way. I’m sorry Jimin!” You mocked bitterly. He rolled his eyes, forcing open the door,
“Well, I’m sorry too.”
CREDIT TO SUGA-OF-DAEGU