3 years ago1,000+ Views
I don't know how I keep finding myself in situations where the person I am with/pursuing isn't as great as I first imagined them to be. Sometimes I think we'll be able to make it to the endgame of marriage but then there are little, horrible things the person does that they don't even realize. And there are lines in Modern Baseball's The Thrash Particle that really get the feeling of being on the receiving end of this kind of stuff.
The thing about a partner that isn't that great to you, is that they probably don't know that they're not that good to you. Especially in the way this song outlines. I've been in plenty situations (some more recent than others) where I'll get told I'm loved in privacy of bathroom at a party and as soon as someone else shows up, I'm not really "there" anymore.
Or going to a show with someone and as soon as the music starts or the band gets on stage, I'm forgotten. These sort of things can sound dramatic but they aren't things the other person even realizes they're doing as they're happening. Every time I've had a conversation about this with a partner or potential partner, they tell me I'm being too sensitive or they try to shift the guilt onto me by saying something like, "I guess I'll change for you". And I think I don't really want the other person to change but validate that their actions are, well, kind of shitty.
I've been having this song on repeat for the past couple of days as a way to cope with all the accidentally terrible people I've had to deal with.

Notable Lyrics:

You suggested I write a song about the first time we met, well I don't wanna remember there or then. So, is this the hook you wanted? Is it stuck inside your head? Can you sing it with your friends, or alone? So, am I what you needed? Say you love me to my face, grin and gossip, walk away and then go... "So is this the hook you wanted? To sing about me to my friends? Well you're just stuck inside your head, all alone. Oh, you were all I needed. Said I loved you to your face, but you just laughed and walked away."
@paulisadroid sounds like you need to get out of those relationships then... it's not worth it
Yikes, that sounds pretty toxic, have you told those people that what there doing isn't good? otherwise they might be blissfully unaware of their behavior.
@nicolejb I've tried. At first they seem like they're listening. But instead of trying to build and figure out how to move forward, it becomes a cycle of I'm sorry's and guilt shifting.