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Q10: My Partner and I have Nothing to Talk About.

When you are in relationships (even friendships) with people sometimes you notice the little changes that come with knowing someone for so long. I know that even for me, I've fallen out of friendships just because we are two different people than we were before.
What connected you in the beginning might now be what connects you today.

This often shows up with relationships, two people that spend a lot of time together.

Q: When my partner and I first met, we were both in the same grad school program. We working both also working in the same chem lab. We graduated and have been together ever since. My partner however, has developed a lot of different habits that I didn't expect. They like to write and perform poetry (which is awesome!). The only thing is I used to be able to connect with them on our similar interests. And now that they are developing these new interests, sometimes our dinner convos are pretty dry. I don't know how to connect with my partner on their interests, and I don't want to talk about chem stuff because I know that's not what they are into anymore. How can I bring up topics that we are both into? How can I connect with my partner again?
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this is actually really easy. if you have something new you want to try why don't you bring it up? he might be interested too. another option would be to talk about things you wish you could do together and try to do them. talk about a show that everyone is into and try to watch it together and see if you like it.
Maybe this the perfect time to rediscover each other.
Find something new you like and get them into that as well as you get into your thing.
I guess it's how interested you are into your partner. If you are not going to be interested in what your partner likes, there won't be anything to talk about. I have been a boring person and totally not interested in what people do. It is only until I read somewhere that to be interesting, you have to be interested. Your steps would be to: 1) find your partner's interest 2) research on them 3) ask questions 4) be curious to find out about everything Your very first step now is to try.
You and your partner don't have to share the same interests to have stuff to talk about. I encourage having different interests. A good thing in a relationship is spending time apart pursuing your interests. Then you have stuff to talk about and share when you are together. If you can't find yourself to care enough to have a conversation about your partner's interests, then I have to wonder about your overall interest in your partner.
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