3 years ago500+ Views
My relationship with this girl is very complicated. She is my best friend of over five years and she is also my "first" we were both in a bad place when it happened but as a few years past, I realized I wasn't just infatuated with her, we connect so well, she's even noticed it. Our tastes are so similar, we can talk for hours. I've had feelings for her once before and she rebuffed my affection stating that she didn't feel the same at the time. I feel as though I should give it another shot since now we are both in a better place, but I would like a second opinion. I'm torn between this. and I can't help but feel as though I can't get closure without telling her. plus I've tried to stop my feelings but there's something about her. something I can't just forget about. P.S. I've always wanted to go to Iceland and me asking her to go was a reference to how I always wanted to go with someone I loved and I'm not sure if she remembers or put two and two together.
@pirateking47 @2Distracted @nicolejb So I decided not to do it on the trip, I'm planning on taking her to dinner this weekend to celebrate her birthday and give her an awesome present so I think after that would be a good time.
I agree on waiting at least. But if it ok id like to give my 2 cents from a girls perspective and one who's experienced a lot of life as well as this exact scenario. I can almost guarantee she remembers what Iceland means to you. Typically girls don't forget that kind of knowledge that shared from someone they are really close to. Also I can almost guarantee she already knows that you still have strong feelings for her still. I guess it boils down to how much of a friend she is to you. It is so rare that there aren't deep feelings that develop on one party or both when in a close friendship with opposite sex. There is a reason you were drawn to her as a friend, qualities you appreciated, things you had in common so it seems only natural that as the friendships develops and gets closer all those things that drew you to her would increase and even more are discovered making the connection stronger and more emotionally binding. I feel its the natural process of things. I was mostly friends with only guys in high school. I hated girl drama and guys weren't catty and etc! well a couple very close close guy friends I would have described my feelings for exactly as you did of your interest just grew and grew as our friendship did. Then we decided to date. when it didn't work out and one said lets just go back to being friends that was an impossibility after crossing over the line. I'm sure some are able but it is so rare to ever be able to go back as your were in closeness as friends. So I ultimately lost these amazing friends! So the question becomes is it worth the risk? the fact that you were able to experience your first time together and go back to just a friendship is pretty amazing but I think you said that things were different after. I really hope I didn't offend you in any way sharing this but I've lost a couple really great guys due to taking the risk. it ended up not worth it cuz I lost them entirely.So give a lot of thought on your decision. sorry to go on and on!!!
@RafaelRese18 good luck to you sir
Yeah, that sounds like a good compromise !! @RafaelRese18 let us know how it goes. And don't be afraid to let her know your true feelings!
@pirateking47 the trip might not happen for a couple of years since it's an expensive trip. @2Distracted, its alright and yes we were different afterwards and it did lead to us losing that closeness but eventually we both wanted to put it past us and continue with our friendship and I honestly regret that night because things might have been different if it hadn't happened. I don't know if I want to risk it because I'm scared of changing things and being rejected
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