AlloBaber
3 years ago1,000+ Views

Do you ever feel like you're not good enough for your relationship?

Or like that special someone will NEVER like you?

Or maybe you feel just a little unloved, even though your partner is amazing and wonderful in every way?

The good news is, a) these feelings are SO normal, b) they're nobody's fault, and c) there are easy ways to work through them!
Over the weekend I got a great tip from a friend who's a psychologist that I really wanted to share with you all. It had to do with a simple (but in my personal experience, highly effective) way of dealing with relationship insecurity.

Am I Insecure In My Relationship?

I say relationship insecurity, but what I mean is any sort of emotional response related to feeling like... maybe you're not as cool as you thought you were. Or maybe you're not quite good enough for your amazing girlfriend. Or maybe, no matter how many times your husband tells you he loves you, you still feel unloved and unsure of your worth.
That's insecurity. It may be in your relationship, but the more likely truth is... it's insecurity in yourself. It's you forgetting (or not realizing in the first place) how amazing you are. How beautiful, smart, wonderful, accomplished, kickass, brave, impressive you are.
So how do we remind ourselves?

The Quick Way to Feel More Loved & Secure

My psychologist friend recommends this:
Train yourself to remember why you're awesome. How do you do that? Write a list of all the amazing, damn cool, unique, attractive things about yourself. What do you love about you? Why are you worthy? What makes other people love to be around you or have you in their life? List it all.
My buddy told me that he reviewed his list every single time he went to the bathroom, and pretty soon, self-love and the confidence and security that comes with it became a habit (just like washing his hands, or so we can only hope).
You don't have to do it his way – if reading-while-pooping freaks you out, post it on your bedroom mirror. Or read it every morning when you wake up and every night before you go to sleep. Just internalize that list, so you can get the love and reassurance you're looking for – from inside yourself. Pretty neat!
If you give this tip a try, I'd love to hear how it works out for you. <3 It's been working wonders for me – I know it might seem a little self-centered, but taking a few minutes each day to dwell on the things that make you awesome is a pretty empowering experience. Try it out and see what you think! :)
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Another thing a friend told me was when you're stuck on a really miserable train of thought and can't seem to break out of it, you should try to remember tangible good feelings. Think 'the smell after it rains', or 'the feeling of a good friend wrapping an arm around your shoulder while you watch a dumb movie', something that grounds you in a physical memory. A lot of the time miserable thoughts aren't about what's real, they're worst-case scenarios that'll never happen. So focusing on something real that felt nice helps bring your brain back out of that nasty hole
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@allobaber you literally couldn't have timed this card any better for me. It's what I needed, when I needed it. As always you said what needed to be said perfectly. Thank you.
"...so you can get the love and reassurance you're looking for - from inside yourself." That. That right there. Such a positive and healthy way to combat insecurities. Something I need to hear and read daily. Thank you, @allobaber!
Anonym
@InPlainSight welcome back bro😁😁😁😁
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