If this doesn't crush you then you probably also don't like puppies. I thought almost this exact same thing the other day. My high school experience has been less than ideal. Bad relationships, lost friends, friends that I didn't actually want to be friends with but I was stuck with anyway, parents splitting up, and lots of other fun things. For some reason, that seems to finally be turning around. I am making friends that I like, having a tiny bit of fun, and becoming more content with where I am. The only problem is that I graduate in 57 days. I am almost happy here, but now it is time to leave. Scratch that. I am almost not miserable here, but now it is time to leave. I was at lunch and I sat there with all these really loud annoying people, and they didn't annoy as much as they normally do, and I caught myself wishing graduation would come sooner. This is not abnormal for me to wish, but I knew I wanted it to come sooner because I was afraid I was finally becoming attatched. I'm tired of letting go of things I love. I don't love my school, but the future scares me and right now I am at peace. A little bit. Just a little. But the peace is there.
Not sure why this one is blurry... It says, "I need you to be clever. I need you to think of solutions to problems we haven't seen yet. I want you to try things that no one has ever tried because they're absolutely stupid." I see this quote in two lights. In one light it seems like the expectations we hold for ourselves and the expectations society has for us. Be better. Learn more. Fix all of the world's problems. And make money doing it. It feels like unwanted pressure. It almost stresses me out a little bit. But then I read it again. There is so much hope and trust and confidence. You don't ask just anyone to fix everything. You ask the best and the brightest. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do (except pay taxes and eventually die, as my friend Ben Franklin would say), but when people ask things of you, it is because they believe you can do it. The world has put its faith in us to make right the wrongs of the past and the present. In our own ways, we can do it.
This book is almost terrifyingly revealing when it comes to human nature, thought, habit, desires, and motivators, and that is why it is beautiful. This is probably the most well known quote from the novel, and for good reason. Ender wants to beat his opponent, and to do that he has to learn about his opponent's strengths and weakness, and he admits that when he does that, he comes to love them in the same way they love themselves, because he knows them. But because he knows them, he can also crush them. Sound like anything else? Relationships. Any sort of relationship. Friendships, partnerships, romantic relationships, parentsl relationships, and even the relationship you have with your enemy. Putting trust in someone is terrifying. Letting them enter into the darkest, most hidden corners of your thoughts and wishes and aspirations and mistakes can end so badly because that person can now destroy you. But we let them in anyway, because they also love us. The struggle comes with letting the right people in for the right reasons. But there is no way to do that without trial and error. We have to be destroyed a little first. Even if it just a friend that moves on. The fact that they hold so much of you in them is destructive when they walk away. Or if someone that you trusted verbally abused you and called you things your grandmother would definately slap you for saying. If they told people things about you. The truth. Mostly lies. If they told you no one would ever love you. All because you let them in. You have to be destroyed at some point. It is a part of this world we live in. But believe me, you will come out stronger and wiser, and you won't be destroyed so easily next time.