This morning, I woke up a little late. I rushed to get dressed and make it to work on time. Fortunately, I wasn't late. I spent my first couple moments at work sipping that first coffee of the day and scrolling down several different video game news feeds. Work can wait, after all.
And that's when I came across Every Day The Same Dream. It's a web-based indie game that, well, is about you. Or since I'm the one who played it, it's about me. It only takes a couple minutes to play and it gives you a couple of "options" while you play but none of them really stick.
And I don't think the game is about choice in the same way other games are about choice.
Most games that are all about player choice are all about the player choosing the outcome of the game. It's why everyone hates Mass Effect 3 (because it didn't allow for the "proper amount" of player choice in the ending). But Every Day The Same Dream is about the choices you make every day.
You can choose to turn the television off, you can choose to talk to your wife before you leave work, you can choose to talk to the elevator lady while you sit there, and you choose to smash into the car in front of you while you're in traffic.
But none of these things matter. And these sort of things reflect your actual life. My actual life.
A couple of months ago, I was trying to waste some time at work by watching some TED Talks one of my co-workers sent me. And there was one in particular that stuck with me about making your real life a game by framing things that are healthy for you in a way that you could look at as stat increases.
One of these things that'll be healthy for you to do from time to time is to stare outside and look at nature or just something that isn't your gray, sad cubicle. And there's one fleeting moment in the game that reflects this weird distance modern day people have with the world around them.
The game allows you to interact with one of the only things that isn't in grayscale but it's a short and fleeting and it's almost like, it doesn't even really happen. It has no bearing on what you do in the game but it's there. It's another "choice" you make that doesn't really result in anything.
And as I played this 5 minute game in my own office. In my own routine. It made me think about the choices that I made throughout my life and how they aren't really significant choices at all.
I went to school, then a private University, and then I got a job. And now here I am. Working the same routine I'll probably continue until I get bored of this job and need another job so I can feel stimulated.
And playing this game that mimicked so much of my life made wonder if I've ever really done anything significant in my life. In my head, I made a list of all the accolades and accomplishments I've had but what do they amount to in the end? I looked at my bank account and saw money in there. There wasn't a lot, but I'm not broke but is that what I'm chasing?
This game didn't answer any grand questions I have about my life and its meaning, if anything, all it did was add more questions to the long list I already have saved in my head. I'm not sure if anything or everything matters. And I don't know if there are any choices worth making other than...
... maybe jumping.
But that wouldn't result in anything worthwhile, either.