Today was not on the schedule at all. Another reason you had snuck in a snack visit to the studio. You check the calendar and confirm that he won’t be home until well after 10 tonight. Being at his place makes you feel closer to him so you head over after you have dinner with Missy. You decide to clean up his place a little; the two of you had been a little distracted earlier.
Ten o’clock rolls around and disappears. Eleven comes and goes with still nothing from him. You aren’t going to fall into the same rut you did a couple of days ago. You know him; either his phone is dead, he didn’t press send, or he is in a focused zone. You lay down on his bed to watch a little TV while you wait for him.
The sound of the TV shutting off wakes you up. You glance up to see him sitting on the couch; slouched over and just staring at you. You smile and sit up,
“Hi. What time is it?”
He doesn’t answer; he seems to almost be staring right through you.
“Jiho? Is something wrong?”
Still no answer, you get up and go over to him.
His eyes haven't left your face, even as you get closer to him. You kneel in front of him, “What is it? You’re starting to scare me. Are the guys okay?”
That rouses him a little and he nods,
“Yeah the guys are great.”
You let out a breath,
“Good. You’re probably just tired, come on, let’s get you to bed.”
You stand to pull him up but he resists.
“Is this really fair?”
You look at him confused,
“Honey I don’t know what you’re talking about. Is what fair?”
“Falling in love with you. You never knowing how late I’ll be or if I can even make it home. Expecting you to just be here. Me coming home to see that you’ve fallen asleep waiting for me.”
He lets go of your hands and puts his head in his. You smile, push his shoulders back and climb into his lap.
“Hey, isn’t all that my choice?”
He pulls you closer and buries his head in your chest.
“I’m afraid. What if it gets to be too much for you? What if you come to hate me for it?”
You pull his head up, cupping his face in your hands.
“I knew who you were when I agreed to start this relationship. All this comes with the career, I know that. Yeah, sometimes it will be hard, I won’t lie.”
He turns his head and you turn it back, “but I’m falling in love with you too.”
His eyes lock onto yours as you press your lips to his in proof. He resists for a minute, as if still unbelieving; until you slide your tongue along the seam of his lips. He groans as he takes the kiss over from you. When you come up for air, his head rests on your shoulder, “God what you do to me.”
He bites your shoulder, licks it better than grabs your face.
“If this isn’t going to work we need to stop now, else losing you will kill me.”
You run your fingers through his hair, kissing his forehead.
“I’m happy right where I am, I don’t plan on going anywhere.”
He stands up still holding you as you wrap your legs around his waist. He turns and braces you against the wall. You gasp in shock, so he lifts his head just long enough to respond;
“It’s too far”.
You can feel the desperation in him, the need to make sure he claims you as his.
A short time later as he lay sleeping next you; you reach over and move the hair out of his face.
“Mine,” you say, repeating his words from earlier.