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“Dear My Most Beloved, Who was Never Meant to be Mine” by Lumina Han
“Dear My Most Beloved, Who was Never Meant to be Mine” by Lumina Han If I never fell in love with you, I would never have understood how destructive, violent, fierce, powerful, selfish, passionate and dangerous love could really be. You made me realize that I could never genuinely love anyone else besides myself. I could never truly give my everything to others, because I expected to receive more than to give. I craved to possess your soul, body and mind more than to embrace you with an untainted heart. And because you became the drive of my downfall, I grasped the truth that I had to let you go. You taught me that falling in love could become the hardest experience that one could ever handle. Meeting you, Seeing you and falling in love with you has been the greatest thrill. Yet, you became the one beam of light that blinded the pitch darkness that I tried to hide from the world. You taught me that I was incapable of devotionally loving you. To sincerely wish for your happiness without me as a part of your future, was an impossibility. I wanted to take ownership of you than for you to be yourself. Because what I really am, beneath my smiles, is that my world revolves solely on my needs and desires. To burn with such a raging fire in my heart for you has driven me into both insanity and clarity. Insanity, because you have forsaken my logic and judgement in those moments when you snatched away the center of my universe. Clarity, because you have revealed the true dark monster that I beheld deep down inside my soul. You have engulfed me in both hell and heaven, and with you I have been on the most thrilling joy of flying high in the sky. Yet because you became my drug, I fell deep down to the endless depths of the lonely, cold ocean, where I could feel nothing but suffocation and heartache. Through both these highest and lowest moments, I have learnt that it was because you never felt the same way as I did for you, that you changed my life forever. I could never be the same again, not because this love was unrequited, but because through loving you, I learnt that the turmoil of emotions I felt for you, weren`t true love at all. I disguised physical chemistry, infatuation, attraction and lust all in the name of ‘love’. Although no one has ever made me feel this much passion and rage as you have, what I felt for you wasn`t absolute love, but rather my own selfish desires and greed projected on to you. Since you walked into my life, you have shed light on how messed up my view of the world really was. Slowly, through the heart wrenching scars that I bleed from falling too deeply for you, I have apprehended things I could never have learnt had you loved me back. It was because we were never meant to be, that I could change. And because our fates were never meant to collide with each other, my paths have diverged away from you and towards you. While I was running away from you, to escape from your consumating presence, I have told myself a million times over to let go of what was never mine to begin with. When I walked closer to you, God taught me that the intense heat I felt for you would burn both of us alive. Because passion that is too rash and too sudden thinks nothing else but using the other to gratify and satisfy one`s own deep lack and emptiness. You were never born to fill up my hole, my scars and my iniquities. You are born to be you, to be the one whom God designed and planned, to be free and liberal from my obsessive presence. You deserve to love someone who loves you the right way, the sincere, faithful and innocent way, as I never did, as I never could have. You loved her instead of me, because my love for you was too lethal and poisonous for us both. Since the day I met you, our story has taken me on a toxic, venomous, annihilative and catastrophic ride towards an inevitable breakdown. You became my destruction, my road to torn deterioration and collapse. I could no longer envision a happy fairy tale ending between us, because the deadly outburst of covet and affection I felt for you consumed my entire being into a fever of stormy delirium. I was mad, crazy about you, and to me, you were all that I ever wanted, all that ever mattered... But because you were much stronger than I ever was, you kept your feet on the ground, and we never crashed into each other with the same disastrous urge and affection. You were my Romeo, but had I also been your Juliet, our story would have ended us in the same tragedy, an end that would have destroyed us both. I was never the one whom you could, would or should ever love. To mistake even for a second that we were one was my greatest delusion, my wildest fantasy and my most absurd illusion that I ever dreamt. Although we can never be together, our story still ends with hope. Because loving you was God`s greatest lesson, gift and inspiration in my life. And for that I am grateful that God brought us together for this period in our youth. Thank you for being the way you were. Because in everything that you were to me, you have been perfect. You made me a better person, without changing me into anyone other than my true self. I became what God made to become, because God let me meet you, fall for you, and grow closer to him through loving you. And because you have taught me what Christ`s love should be, you will forever remain a special treasure and secret deep in my heart, as my most beloved who was never meant to be mine. Even if our destinies never cross paths in the future, no one will ever replace what you were to me, and what you have made me become. And now, at the ending page of our story, I think I can finally love you the way you always deserved to be loved. I will love you even when you love someone else. I will love you even if you never return my love back to me. Perhaps in the future, I will fall in love again, with someone else besides you. And because of the things you have taught me about God and true love, I will love them more sincerely than I ever loved you. My passion for you will gradually wane and be replaced by a new love. But please know that I would never have been able to give them the love that they deserve, had I never loved you first. You were my first one true love, that changed everything for me. I love you in all your entirety, with or without me as a part of your life. Thank you, for being the beginning sentence, the first chapter and the opening of my love story.
Thanks Everyone :)
Hello people :) Mariah here, with a special message to everyone who follows me, my collections, my meme fam, my quote fam, and anyone who even bothers to look at any of my cards. ^^ To start off, I have something I just have to say. :) edit made by me I have recently gotten 5,000 followers, and a friend of mine on the team inspired me to do this.. I wasnt going to at first, but you all deserve it. :) And a quick personal thank you to her. She's absolutely fantastic. ^^ The thing is, another friend of mine on Vingle, who is also on the team, found out for me that when a new user makes an account, you automatically follow the top popular accounts in the interest you take. I honestly dont care about numbers. I just care about making cards of BTS and making you guys happy with them. ^^ That same friend has told me millions of times that I deserve the number of followers I have. (Thank you for always keeping my spirits up, by the way.) But the thing is... I don't think I do. :) You all have given me so much support and many happy thoughts. I'd be the same me as I always have been even without the follower count. Even though most of the followers I have follow me unwillingly, I'm thankful to those of you who actually enjoy my cards. :) ❤ The reason why this is tagged in the JapaneseAnime and Quotes tag is because I want to thank all of you otakus and quote lovers who have been with me since Day 1 of when I posted my first card to Vingle, 'Quote #1'. MY VERY FIRST CARD!!! Thank you for sticking by me these past... Woah... 2 years! You guys are awesome, really. ಥ⌣ಥ But unfortunately, as I said 100 quotes ago, I'll be ending the quotes at 700. (┳Д┳) But the collection will have 701. (Yeah I know it bothers the hell out of me too..) My two year anniversary of when I first posted a card to Vingle is coming up. November 30th, 2015 I believe. :) I don't know if I'll do anything for that, but I just wanted to state it to show how far I've come on Vingle. ^^ (Don't judge me, let me be proud of myself... ;-; ) Anyways! Thank you everyone, who has read this far. :)  And those who were tagged for daily quotes.. it was nice posting for you all. ^^ But this will be the last time I put this tag list in a card. ╥﹏╥ ♡ Tag List ♡: @joshhsherer @Sugasadamsapple @LeaEsterline @rubychan19 @SimplyAwkward @animelord @AlexisRiver @SteveZuniga @antwonbro12 @LoneRose72 @jazminramirez9 @xigot7forlifex @CrazyOtaku3 @GhoulGasterIRL @MasonBurt @assasingod @crimsonsasuke @xDaisyDaysx @IztimZeugirdor @kouvarisb @DorianBeil @lopleaf19 @Dragonshaow @Dynasty5789 @Nyxxonn @padfoot77 @simpsonsamantha @ZombieDragon @FlotiNMusiCNotE @ChristopherKenn @JackBlink @jeonstussy @Subtilitas And I hope all ARMY are ready for more Bangtan cards from me as I part ways with anime. ^^ Everyone. Thank you again. :) •♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡• (Comment To Be Tagged In Any List) ◇ Addixtion Fam ◇ @SkyBlast @Sugasadamsapple @MelissaGarza @QueenPandaBunny @SugaKookieV @Gracielou0717 @AkiraMarie13 @JazminNegrete @sukkyongwanser BANGTAN'S ARMY TAGLIST: A: @AbbyRoscoe @AddictedtoKPOP @Addixtion @adritae @AgentLeo @AhensaAdel @AkiraMarie13 @AlenaSegura @AliceTetsuya @aliendestina @Alpha95 @AraceliJimenez @ashrose33 @AsystolinaTawan @awkwardjazzy @AmbieB @Airamatheah @ARMYaki16 @AngelaDarkness @animani B: @B2STJYDHDK @babysanchez1253 @Badtz @Baekyeol27 @170cme @bantanella @BeeTeeS @BreHolmes @BTSxEXO C: @cathysanchez157 @ChandraTorres @Changkyunie @cherriblossom17 @Choijiah @cns1391 @ColorMeKihyun D: @DaintySoul @DefSoul1994 @destiny1419 @DejaunaeSiders E: @Eli20 @emilyrivera21 @Eswee @EvilGenius @EvodiaEbraheem G: @glorias463 @Gracielou0717 H: @hayoungforever @Helixx @hopesforsuga711 @HopeYoongi @Hskswife @hyqtpie I: @ImHayley @imiebegay14 @InfiniteKiss @inuyashagal @iraVVIP @IrishCabacungan J: @jadmarie4567 @Jaerinn @JasminMartinez @JaxonB @JenGambale @jenissa711 @JerannethaBroug @jiminakpop @JJiBin @jjrockstar @JohnEvans @Josyy7AshleiRyals K: @KarenGuerra93 @karinamiranda81 @kee1999kee @KenyaMendoza @kimnam94 @KokoroNoTakara @Kpoplover2016 @kristendmh @Kyokeo @KeraDelatorre L: @LacyTanner @LemonLassie @LinnyOk @LiyahBoon @lopleaf19 @loverofkpop @luna1171 @luvella18 @LynetteXuan  @laurenkim3 M: @maddsanzen @MaggieHolm @MakaylaAtkins @MamaNini @MayraCastro @MelissaGarza @merryjayne13 @MistressSiren @MsLoyalHeart N: @nykechun P: @parktaemi @pharmgirlerin @Pickles440 Q: @QueenPandaBunny R: @resavalencia @RKA916 S: @sarahdarwish @SarahMoniva @Seera916 @selfishmachines @ShannonSaysHey @shellyfuentes70 @shisuschrist @simpsonsamantha @SindyHernandez @StefaniTre @StephanieDuong @StephaniePoore @strawberrylover @strawberrymintl @SugaKookieV @sukkyongwanser @SunnaWalo @SweetDuella @sweetnothing34 @Swhitta T: @Tamaki1618 @TashiannaBostia @tayamay1232 @TerraToyaSi @ThanaPlague @thatphamily @thekpoprealm @TheRealAgustD @tinytreeleaf @2TracyLynnn @TwistedPDnim V: @Vay754 @VickyLe @Viresse @VKookie47 W: @warning X: @xLonelyUnitatox @xDisappearx Y: @yehetmyohorat97 @YeojinOfficial @YessicaCardenas @YiselRamos @Yugykookie97 Z: @zilVer @ZeleniaMoon BANGTAN’S ARMY TEAM TAGLIST: @PolarStarr @Addixtion @SkyBlast @warning @YulaGyeom @Changkyunie @MelissaGarza ♡MEME FAM TAGLIST♡ @RmNoodles @PolarStarr @kristendmh @StefaniTre @QueenPandaBunny @MonieManhiM @LynetteXuan  @LeeChungHa @Josyy7 @tayamay1232 @TerraToyaSi @simpsonsamantha @RionaHenry @SugaKookieV @Emealia @Nyxxonn @MiyukiKawaii @SisAh @HannahLeonard @jiminakpop @KPOPDESTROYEDME @AimeBolanos  @maddsanzen @GoldenV @StephaniePoore @MikaelaGarzoria @SimplyAwkward  @XionHeart @kamaryn671 @AlexRae @2ilVer @MidajahRodrigue @ChristinaCovert @YsaGtz  @GreciaFlores  @littleumiko @ARMYaki16 @KeraDelatorre @Namjoonsbutt @KarenDonley
MV Analysis/Theory: BTS and Nietzsche
"One must still have chaos within oneself, to give birth to a dancing star." - Thus Spoke Zarathustra: A Book for All and None, by Friedrich Nietzsche. (wiki on the book here) 1. For Whom You Shine The book begins with the quote: "You great star, what would your happiness be had you not those for whom you shine?" This clearly plays into the song lyrics, that they are nothing without the person they love. They offer their blood, sweat and tears to them, without this person to shine for, they are empty. 2. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Nietzsche's writing often refers to the idea of eternal recurrence. This is the idea that all events in one's life will happen again and again, infinitely. "The embrace of all of life's horrors and pleasures alike shows a deference and acceptance of fate, or Amor Fati. The love and acceptance of one's path in life is a defining characteristic of the overman*. *Overman - Nietzsche thinks that it is important for every generation to overcome their humanity. To be better than it, to push forward and grow and defy the boundaries set by the mere fact that we're human. Someone who creates something new is an overman. Is Jin repeating his actions over and over again but changing it slightly each time? Are we witnessing the butterfly effect? (For example we see Jungkook on the bike again, the lilies from I Need U, etc) Will the most beautiful moment in life go on forever, and is it turning into a nightmare?
Jungkook No Longer Baby Boy (+19)
Que tal peeps! WE ARE STILL COUNTING DOWN TO JUNGKOOK'S BIRTHDAY IN THE AMS COMMUNITY. THIS IS A QUICK FANFICTION THAT CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT! Jungkook has always been like a little brother to you and you always looked after him, especially when the guys picked in him. You were planning a special birthday surprise for him with the guys. "He should be happy he gets a cake." Yoongi scuffed. "Well well now lets not be too mean Yoongi...he is the youngest." I said while writing down ideas. You and the guys came up with a plan. You and Jin would bake a cake and cook food. Hobi and Tae would clean up while Namjoon and Yoongi decorated. "Namjoon please don't break anything." Hobi laughed. Namjoon rolled his eyes and laughed. The next day it was super hot in the office and all you wanted to fo was take a shower. You rushed home and jumped into the shower. Jin would be shopping for food with Namjoon while the others bought decorations. Jungkook would be at the library volunteering so everything should be finished then. The water felt so good as you allowed it to hit your skin. You had your relaxing body wash. You inhaled the lavender scent and lathered up your body sponge. You began cleaning and singing when you seen a pair of eyes looking in the small crack of the door. You paused thinking you seen something else. You didn't know if your mind was playing tricks on you. Then you looked back and no one was there. You finisjef showering and walked down to your room. You noticed Jungkook's door was cracked. This was strange cuz he always locks his door. You pay no mind and get dressed. The crew arrived and you all get to preparing the surprise birthday for Jungkook. You were pleased how everything played out. Namjoon only broke 3 things which is good. You walked to your room to get an extra present you brought for Jungkook when you noticed your pantry drawer was opened. Your neatly arranged panties were all a mess. You picked up the present wrapped in shiny red wrapper and seen that Jungkook's door was cracked wider. You walked down the hall and heard odd noises. "Yass gosh noona..." You peeped your head in without makjng a sound and saw Jungkook with your panties in his hand. He was licking a pink pair with a red pair wrapped around his man hood. Jungkook was stroking himself. You found yourself shook for a moment. But then you began watching out of enjoyment. Your breathing goth heavier. Jungkook slowly his hand motion and grinned. "I know you are watching me noona." You covered ur mouth. But a gasp escaped ur wet lips. "Jungkook why do you have my panties? "Noona you know I want you. I made that clear last week when I spanked the hell out of you. Remember you made me promise not to tell." You walked into his room and closed the door. "Shh boy that was a mistake." "A mistake?" Jungkook said while raising his eyebrow. He smiled while looking at the gift I had. "Nice wrapping but do you know what I really want noona?" Jungkook smirked. Jungkook walked closer to be still hard as a brick and stood behind me allowing his hard on to rub between by cheeks. He let out a groan. "I know you been with all the guys nonna, they brag about it. I want you now." Jungkook said. "Jungkook...look those days are behind me. I'm no longer group banging trash." "Okay I will just spread the word at work." Jungkook laughed. "Fine Jungkook." I hissed. Jungkook pushed me on my stomach while sliding my shorts to the side. He was happy to see I had in no panties. He stuffed a pair or my panties he had in my mouth and plunged deep inside me without mercy. The pink wet panties muffled my scream of pleasure. Jungkook pounded me hard and fast. "Noona you were all wet from watching me?" Jungkook smacked my butt hard. "ANSWER me. You like watching me wack off?" I nodded as he pulled me hard into him. He switched so we were facing the mirror and began pounding me hard hitting all my spots. "Look at that little face. You love it noona. Yoongi said you like it rough." I surprised Jungkook and pusjed him back on his butt. I climbed on top of him. "You gotta do more to get me off little baby boy." I said while grinning. I began riding him hard and fast while pulling his hair. He began sucking my right breast as I rode him. "Yass that's a good baby boy." I moaned. I could see he was coming to the edge and so was I. The room echoed of slapping skin. "Noona yasss! Oh shit!" Jungkook moaned while exploded in me. The explosion made me go over the edge. My vision was so blurry. Suddenly the crew busted in "Happy Birthday Jungkook!" "Shit looks like we got to the party late." Yoongi blurted. 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