basically BTS songs speak to me on so many levels its not even funny. so I just had a conversation with this guy and 1. it was depressing, 2. I realized some things the situation is a long story but moral of the story I'm at a different point of my life than a lot of people my age, especially in the kind of area I live in. I've never felt like I fit in around here & college has showed me that I actually don't. I'm very focused on developing my own life as an individual right now as I'm going to graduate next December with plans to move to LA with my friend who has similar dreams. I have big dreams for my future but I also keep it realistic.
So I'm a busy person, work 2 jobs, full time student, study Korean on my own, I do stuff with my YouTube channel, attempt to have a social life and that's the jist. Some people around me where I live just don't understand me at all, which is why I'm not an outgoing person who opens up to every person I meet. I have those friends though that do understand me & I them. Anyways...
So especially in BTS's album Most Beautiful Moment in Life part 2. I loved it & ESPECIALLY the songs Butterfly, Run, & Baepsae(crow tit) actually spoke to me as a person & I could relate the song/lyrics to things in my life at the time & still can honestly. NOW BTS newest album Young Forever, I feel in love again with an official release of BTS Butterfly Prologue ver. (which I'm also considering doing a full choreo video to this song like I did in the video above)
So this version speaks to me even more, I originally fell in loved and was so moved by this song when I heard it in the prologue video. This song legit speaks to me in my life & this is one of the few songs in the world that truly moves me emotionally and drives me toward my dreams in every way.
THEN after having this convo with my friend, I had some thoughts about life. The jist is he was telling me how I don't make time for him (were not dating, though he does like me) & just throwing all this stuff at me that I don't do but he kind of understands I'm busy and that I do things because of my past, yet he's here basically blaming me and targeting me about all this stuff so I was getting a little depressed by end of this convo that went on for hours. He also tells some friends about me & apparently they all agree about certain things. (keep in mind this is all cuz he likes me & Ive already told him I wont date him, i mean im moving to LA this year & he hasnt started college yet, were at different points i. our lives) So he leaves after the convo & I'm just like...depressed so I go and listen to Butterfly Prologue. Song moved me and started thinking about my life & myself. Then I listen to FIRE & read along with the lyrics. THEN I'm like YOU KNOW WHAT. NO. YOURE RIGHT BTS!! I'm not about to change myself for these people. All these people opinions about me don't even matter at all. IM GUNNA DO ME! I'm at a point where I'm focused on me. I may not have everything together & others may think I'm a loser or not worth their time or whatever, but I have goals and dreams and passion that drive me to better myself to work hard to accomplish.
1. I do my YouTube channel not because I'm an amazing dancer, I've never had dance training, I just love it. I love music & dancing & writing choreography is fun. it makes me happy. I enjoy making videos wih my friend Sauche who is now involved on this YouTube channel also 2. I love where I am in my life. I'm working towards my dream career in the business side of the entertainment industry 3. I'm not in a point in my life where I'm about to start a relationship with someone who I know I don't love & is going down a different path 4. I study Korean because I love Kpop and for my future career hopefully. I hope to one day work within Korean Entertainment, hopefully with bringing concerts & fanmeets and such to the USA or even better, being a person who helps plan the actual performances and gives ideas for performances and such. 5. For some reason BTS songs are on point with where I am in life ever since DOPE cane out. Idk if it's because I'm in the same age group as the BTS members (94 Liner) but DOPE is about working hard while others are out goofing off and not going anywhere in life kind of, and when that song came out, that's exactly where I was. Butterfly, Run, Fire, when these songs came out, the lyrcis just spoke to me and I was like 'wow that's exactly where I am right now' BTS knows what's up~
but yeah. anyways. just a little rant of mine. I love music so much & I love being kpop fan. <3 DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.