thirstytearsx
a year ago500+ Views
Thoughts of You
I fell in love with you because you were the most beautiful person I ever laid eyes on. I fell in love with you because I knew that you were one of a kind; something and someone different. Once I got to know you, you reached and kissed me and that's when I knew that I was in love; once again. I am saying once again because I am scared of getting hurt. I am scared of waking up to a tomorrow knowing that you would be gone. It was a form of catastrophe when you opened that door and run away, because I knew that the person that I loved the most got away. Baby boy, I know that you don't want me in your life anymore, I know that you don't want to be nothing more. I remember when you said that I was your other half, that I was the love of your life but I guess that was a mistake. I guess it was a mistake to tell me those things because we both knew that those were stunningly beautiful and you didn't know how big of a value words were once. Now that you're gone, I miss the sound of your laugh, gazing at your beautiful eyes, you calling my name, you hugging me tight and never letting me go. The taste of your nicotine lips made me more addicted to you and now I am quiet scared of falling in love again with someone new because in the back of my head it was always you. // written by me Before I sleep; thoughts of you storm in my head and they give me a headache and I mean; I try to forget the fact that you're gone because there's nothing I can do to bring you back. Reality can be painful but we can't regret things I mean; they happen for a reason and this reason was you. You were the most beautiful mistake I've ever made though it adds pain to what already exists. And I can sadly say that you are not part of my life anymore but I guess that's for the best because we both were confused with "blinded" love as you said; or at least; you said for yourself. You know what's scary? That people may look beautiful on the outside but on the inside they are someone who you don't want to meet. I mean once I used to be with you it would make me feel alive and honestly it gave me oxygen to my lungs as my heart would sing in harmony. I guess our love wasn't true for you, I guess that it was a mistake for the poor soul of yours. Mistaken luck and foresaken trust is all I can think of right now, not you, not me, but different paths of our lives that make us different, because in the end we weren't meant to be together; but; that's what I have to put in my mind. Moving on is hard but I'll make it through. My head and chin are held up high with a broken spine but that's okay because even if the skies are gray; I will make all the clouds disappear and find true faith in myself and find once again who I really am. Because who needs a guy to tell them that they are worthy to live? I believe that we all came for a reason to this world; somehow placing a spark to this world and enchancing it more than what it already is. So; I'll do the same for myself and as people walk by they will somehow leave a mark to my life giving it a reason to survive so I will indeed keep pushing myself to find a better soul than what you already were; because yours made me have self destruction; but honey; we don't have the same taste in truth and lies; they all live inside.
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