Pairing: There ain’t no pairing just yet (but it’s with all the Maknae line)
Length: 1633 words
Summary: “No strings attached”- that’s the rule I followed. Until it came to bite me in the ass.
Jungkook pulled out, his voice hoarse from yelling my name. Like, legit yelling- my ears were still ringing. He flopped down on the bed beside me, the two of us panting. I would have to shower again now...I thought about sending the boys my damn water bill.
He had got even madder when he eyed the marks on me that Jimin had made earlier today. But I didn’t care. I wasn’t his, that was what his girlfriend was for. And even she fucked him about constantly. So where did that leave him? He was essentially alternating between two fuck-buddies.
Jungkook had ignored his phone 5 times now, and I was getting a headache. Catching my breath, I sat up slowly and put on the nearest item of clothing to me- which happened to be his shirt.
“Answer the damn phone”, I groaned. We both knew who it was and he stared daggers at me, but still listened and answered. His pressed a finger to his temple in an attempt to rid himself of the probable migraine he had. And if he didn’t have one then boy, he was about to get one.
His girl could speak non-stop like she was constantly getting a buzz from crack cocaine. She spoke loud, she spoke fast. Lord knows how Jungkook put up with her 24/7.
I normally left straight after, but I wanted to sit through this call for my own amusement. So I leaned lazily on his headboard, my legs stretched out, as I started at his bare, hunched-up form trying to hide his stress from me.
Three seconds into the call, and Jungkook already looked like he was being drained of his soul. I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing.
I heard her voice loud and clear. She sounded like she was crying. “I love you Jungkook...you know that right?” I really couldn’t hide my smirk at this point. I stretched my arms up and yawned, getting bored of this conversation.
I was kinda expecting shouting, more crying- maybe some cursing. Te whole package. Considering how angry Jungkook had been when I got to the door. But clearly, Jeon Jungkook was weaker than I thought. He cleared his throat before replying.
“I love you more babe”, he muttered, purposely avoiding my staring. My smirk faltered. Why the hell did he do this to himself? Literally, the amount of arguments they had, he had the opportunity to end this relationship like three times a week! Idiot.
Not to mention, I knew he was lying. No way on fucking Earth did he love her. I scowled at the very word. Love didn’t exist. It just consisted of one mistake after another, lulling the two people involved into a false sense of security.
Yoongi had taught me that. In case you didn’t know, that was the name of my violent ex. He had told me he was in love with me too. Ha. Motherfucker loved alcohol more than he ever loved me. And when he had cheated, that was the last straw.
Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung didn’t know about my past. The one time Jimin had tried to ask, I told him I had to go. Why bring it up? Those memories just made me bitter and angry, so I kept them repressed.
So as I watched Jungkook sit there and tell this bitch he loved that, my face contorted in disgust. I had zoned out, and was examining a purple bruise on my inner thigh, when their call ended.
He sighed. I am no Sherlock, but I could see he regretted everything he had just said to her. He knew he needed to stop seeing me behind her back. He knew it. But he had said it himself- he couldn’t.
He was like a drug addict who got uncontrollable cravings, and I was the damn dealer, supplying with him with everything he needed. Not needed, sorry- wanted. He wanted this. He was happy this way.
He would have a decent two days with her. She’d make him mad. He’d call me over and fuck me into oblivion. He’d calm down and make up with her. It was a vicious cycle that showed no signs of slowing down.
I said what he was thinking. “We need to stop doing this Jungkook.” This certainly wasn’t the first time I had said this to him. His head snapped up and his dark eyes glared at me, trying to silently make me regret my words. I leaned my head back, gently hitting the headboard.
“I can’t do that”, he growled, slowly crawling up to me, his dark eyes menacing. “Without you I’d go mad. You’re my only form of stress-relief.”
Still on his hands and knees, and practically on top of me, he nuzzled his face into my neck, his lips assaulting my skin in the sweetest way. Despite the pleasurable feeling, I snorted. “You should consider counselling.”
He huskily replied, his voice muffled. “Very funny. Wait until you’re in love, then you’ll know what I’m going through.”
I sounded bored as I replied airily, “Been there, done that, bought the god damn t-shirt.” He stopped what he was doing, and looked up at me. He looked good- hair pushed back, swollen lips, panting.
My eyes flitted from his lips, to his eyes which were staring at me in disbelief. “You’ve been in a proper relationship?” I narrowed my eyes at him, crossing my legs. My hips were sore from the way Jungkook had drilled into me,but I managed it.
“And why the fuck is that so hard to believe?” I asked, my tome demanding. Jungkook was asking to get his ass kicked. “No...It’s just- I didn’t think you had ever fallen for anyone.”
“You think I don’t speak from experience when I tell you love is bullshit?” I took his shirt back off and tossed it on the bed beside me, then got up to search for my own clothes. Bringing up my past always irked me more than I liked to admit.
“You’re leaving?” He sounded...sad almost. He never gave a shit usually. I would just slip out silently- until the next time. “You know how this works”, I mumbled numbly, buttoning my jeans.
Jesus, was I messed up or what? If this had been anyone other than the three men who properly knew my personality, they would have thought I was jealous. But no, far from it.
“We both know she’ll be here soon Jungkook. She always turns up soon after she calls.” I finally had all my own clothes on. I turned to smile sweetly at him. He was still on the bed, undressed, clearly unsure of what to do. He knew better than to stop me, but I could tell he didn’t want me to leave yet either, for whatever reason.
I was still smiling when I said, “Enjoy the make-up sex. Ring me when she fucks up again, yeah?” That sounded a lot more sarcastic than I had intended. But seeing Jungkook continuously make the same mistake of letting that witch back into his life was annoying, to say the least.
I headed for his door, and he called my name after me. “Y/n...”. But his girlfriend didn’t live far, and he would not be happy to get caught cheating. So I closed the door behind me, ignoring his voice.
This wasn’t me being harsh. This was me being logical. Plus, as soon as he saw his girlfriend he would forget I even existed. So I kept going. I was exhausted and again, I hadn’t drove. And it looked like it was about to rain.
I silently cursed my life as I heard the distant yet distinct sound of thunder. I walked passed a warmly lit restaurant, looking in to gaze at the seemingly happy couples out for an evening meal.
What I saw in there made me take a couple of steps back and stop. And look again. He was in there. With a pretty girl. They both had their heads resting in their hands as they talked and laughed.
Poor girl. She didn’t know his real colours yet by the looks of it. Or maybe Yoongi had actually sobered up since we broke up. Who knew. But I hadn’t seen him this happy since when I had first met him.
His stupid dorky smile, the way his eyes lit up. And he had dyed his hair to this amazing silvery hue. I almost smiled, but then those repressed memories resurfaced.
My bruises, my screams, his taunts. When everything hurt, emotionally and physically and he thought sex was the answer. That sex would just magically cure me of the pain he had inflicted. “Fuck you”, I muttered under my breath, hastily walking away.
I could kinda sympathise with Taehyung, him having recently gone through a break-up himself. He still wasn’t over her, and when it got too much he would let me know so I could help him forget for a few hours.
This is why I always said, no strings attached. Taehyung and Jungkook were constantly suffering because of someone they called their significant others. But instead of listening to my damn warnings of prevention, they used me for a cure.
There was only word to describe this whole ordeal- toxic. Relationships were toxic. Love was fucking toxic. And anyone who disagreed was stupid.
I got home, showered once more, and flopped down on my bed. It wasn’t even that late, but I really was tired. My plan had been to eat lunch and have a nap before I met Jungkook, but of course Jimin had called me last minute.
I fell into yet another restless sleep, dreading yet another eight hours worth of Min Yoongi haunting me in my nightmares.
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