3 years ago5,000+ Views
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Length: 4945 words
Summary: I was always just a ‘friend’. And no matter how much it hurt, I took it- because it was better than nothing.
Part: 1/?
Based on this request by anon- I kinda changed the plot quite a bit slightly anon, hope you don’t mind! If you want a Part 2 ,let me know!^^
‘Best friends’. Huh. Just saying the words left a bitter taste in my mouth. But that was what Jeon Jungkook was to me. Or rather, what I was to him. We had been friends for years, and in that time I had gradually come to like him for more than a friend. So it really added insult to injury when he got a girlfriend. Hani. She hated me from the get go. And she didn’t even bother to hide it.
So now here we were, both in our early twenties. He was a few months older than me, but we had always been in the same year at school. Always together. As ‘best friends’. Though, I have to say, I commend myself for keeping my feelings hidden all these years. Or I did until I found out he was dating. Then I hated myself for it.
Having to sit through hours of cringe. Literally we could be talking about the role of Adolf Hitler in World War 2 Circa 1940, and he would randomly sigh, with this idiotic smile on his face, “Ah I’m so lucky to have a girl like her.” I would have to clench my jaw to stop myself from cursing at him. He was completely smitten. With a bitch.
Since I had known Jungkook he had been in three relationships, including Hani. The other two had gone to shit pretty quickly. I had been in one. Taehyung. Taehyung was the most upbeat, cute guy I had ever met. In fact, the reason we broke was one night we had a heated argument about me being too close to Jungkook.
I could see his concern, seeing as I spent all my time with him. But I had still picked my friendship over my relationship. Of course Jungkook didn’t know this. All he knew was we had argued. Thankfully, me and Taehyung remained good friends- he wasn’t the type to just brush people off.
So in a nutshell, I had put up with a lot of pain for this boy behind the scenes, and he was oblivious to it all. And I would have to make sure he remained oblivious, because now he had Hani in his life.
I was sat in the kitchen, absent-mindedly waiting for the popcorn in the microwave, while Jungkook had gone to the bathroom. We made plans a couple of days ago to have a movie night, because we were both bored, and as he had pointed out, we were seeing each other less and less frequently.
Even though I heard footsteps, I stayed in my own little world, thinking it’d be Jungkook. But of course it wasn’t because when did life ever go peacefully? “Baby, I dropped by to s- What the fuck are you doing here?!”
It was Hani. I winced at the loudness of her voice before answering bluntly. “Waiting for my popcorn.” My eyes widened as I saw Jungkook come to a stop behind her. I stayed quiet, hoping he would see first hand what a bitch she was.
She glared at me. “Don’t fuck with me y/n. What the fuck are you doing at my boyfriends house? He’s dating me, not you! Why the fuck do you think you can come in here and-”
To my disappointment, Jungkook coughed quietly to end her rant prematurely. I jumped as the microwave beeped, finally. Hani turned to face him and her face went red.
“Baby!”, she crooned and I rolled my eyes.
“Why the hell were you shouting at y/n like that?”, he asked quietly. I could see he was not in the mood to play games. His eyes flashed with an unspoken anger.
She sighed, trying to play the victim. “I’m sorry baby. It’s been a long day, and I’m so ill from being out in the rain all day . I missed you so much and was just a bit upset to see y/n in the kitchen instead of you.” She turned to me and sighed, “I’m sorry y/n.”
I knew Jungkook wouldn’t be happy with her- this was the first time he had witnessed her act like a complete brat. Normally she got away with it without him knowing. But to my disbelief...
He let out a small smile and she turned and went to him for a hug, which he granted her. “It’s ok babe.” At this point I was staring at the microwave, unable to watch this scene unfold before me. “C’mon you can watch the movie with us. I’ll make some soup and you’ll feel better.”
She threw me a smirk before sauntering off. She had ruined the damn night. Jungkook was shuffling about in the kitchen, trying to make her soup. He didn’t even look at me, not even aware that he had just hurt me more than that bitch ever could. He saw her shout at me like that yet turned a blind eye.
My ‘best friend’. I texted Taehyung a quick ‘Can you ring me pls’, and stood there, not knowing what to do. “You gonna get that popcorn out or...?” I snapped back into reality and he lightly laughed at me. I didn’t return the smile. I took the popcorn out slowly, and placed it on the tray he used for snacks.
I was doing my best to avoid being in the living room with her. Thankfully, Taehyung rang just as Jungkook finished in the kitchen. He leaned on his counter inquisitively staring, because hardly anyone ever called me. I acted like I hadn’t planned the call out.
“Hey y/n”, Taehyung’s deep voice bought a small smile on my face, despite how hurt I was feeling deep down. He really was a good guy. I sometimes think maybe I made the wrong decision between him and Jungkook. I mean, Jungkook had no problem putting his girlfriend before me. “You asked me to call?”
“Taehyung!”, I spoke as if we hadn’t met in years when I had seen him at uni two days ago. Jungkook visibly stiffened at the sound of Taehyung’s name. He seemed to find it strange that despite our break-up, we still talked.
I would have found it weird too- before I met Taehyung. He had a special place in my heart, even though I had all those pent-up feelings for Jungkook. Clearly only one of them had mutual feelings. And clearly that wasn’t Jungkook.
“Y/n...? Wait, you need to get out of a situation?” He asked finally catching on. This wasn’t the first time I had done this. The first time was when I was forced into clubbing with Jungkook and his friends- I hate clubbing. So I called Taehyung and pretended it was my mum. He had teased me for weeks about it.
“Yep!”, I laughed again, making it look like I was engaging in normal conversation. He stayed silent, which meant that I could make up any excuse and roll with it. “Oh, you need help? Are you at home? OK, I’ll be right over.”
He chuckled to himself. “You really are a wierdo. See you later.”
“Wait!”, I hastily stopped him from hanging up. “Shall we go for coffee?”My movie night was ruined. Didn’t mean that me going out had completely gone to waste. “Like...for real or pretend?”, Taehyung asked. He wasn’t mocking me, I could tell it was a genuine question.
“For real”, I giggled, momentarily forgetting Jungkook was still in the room. “K, see you in a bit.”
And with that he ended the call. Before I put my phone away, I texted him a quick ‘Thank you’ and looked up apologetically. “Sorry Jungkook, duty calls. Taehyung needs help on a project”, I lied. I didn’t want to cause a scene in front of his girlfriend, so this seemed my best way out.
“Why is his project your responsibility?”, was all he asked. He looked a little hurt, seeing as we had planned tonight. But I was hurt too, because we had planned it- just us. No girlfriend.
“It’s not...I’m just being a good friend. Besides you have someone to watch the movie with now”, I pointed my head towards the living room, my annoyance rising up once more and the thought of a smug Hani sitting in there.
“She’s no fun”, he whispered. I secretly liked his response, but no fucking way was I going to third wheel all night. I shrugged. “Sorry Kookie.”
“It’s pouring out”, he mumbled. “You’ll catch your death out there.” I shrugged again. “Bit of rain never killed anyone”, I said loud enough for Hani to hear. She was totally bullshitting about feeling ill because of the rain- she had been completely dry when she came in.
It was hard to brush him off when he showed genuine compassion for me like that. But it was even harder to watch him fall in love with someone that wasn’t me.
I remember one time, Jungkook and me were play-fighting. This was quiet early on in his and Hani’s relationship. She had gone to wash her hands after a meal that I had actually made for Jungkook, but she complained that she was hungry, and he ended up giving it to her. She actually liked it until he told her I had made it.
Anyway, she called him into the kitchen to help him ‘with something’. I heard the whispers between her and him, and the very thought made my stomach churn.
“Are you sure she’s just a friend?”, Hani was demanding. “You spend more time with her than you do me. And even when we’re together, all you do in text her! Of course I’m gonna worry!”
"Baby there’s nothing to worry about. Me and y/n...we aren’t like that. I don’t think of her like that. We’re friends, nothing more, OK? I love you.” I had waited for the two of them to come back to the living room before announcing that I should probably get going.
Those words, although I knew they were true, hearing them out loud stung. Just thinking about it made me bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from crying.
“See you Jungkook”, I mumbled, avoiding his gaze as the memory replayed itself in my head. “Have fun tonight.”
He called my name, just loud enough for me to hear, but I kept going, despite his protests. I sighed as I stepped outside, getting drenched in seconds. But the rain acted as a good disguise, mixing with my tears. It hurt. Seeing him in love with someone else hurt.
Was I being selfish? Probably. But I hated seeing him give affection to anyone else. It was driving me mad, being in love with him all this time. It wasn’t even just a crush, which made the whole thing worse. I was in love. With someone who was off-limits. Fuck my life.
I walked to the coffee shop, feeling numb. Taehyung lived practically next door to it so he was already there, umbrella in hand. He saw me and his eyes widened. “Jesus Christ y/n”, he said, rushing over to put the umbrella over me- like that was gonna dry me off.
I laughed, hoping my eyes weren’t bloodshot from the crying. “I’m fine Tae. Just a bit of water.” He shook his head silently, dragging me by the arm into the warm coffee place. I hadn’t realised I was shivering. He dragged me to the table right by a radiator and put his jacket around me.
“Wait here, I’ll go order.” I smiled up at him , teeth chattering. He remembered what I liked to drink. By the time he had sat back down with our drinks, I wasn’t shaking so much.
“You’ve been crying”, he stated. It wasn’t a question- he knew. I cupped the warm bag, sighing at the intense heat radiating from it into my hand. “Maybe”, I grinned weakly.
“Do share. Seeing as I just paid for the coffee.” I laughed, nudging him under the table with my foot. “Cheeky.” Then I sighed, going back to my melancholy state. “It wasn’t even a big deal.”
“Clearly it was to you y/n. Now tell me what happened.” The concern in his voice was overwhelming. So I caved and told him. I told him about the plan we made for tonight. I noticed he looked unfazed when I mentioned Jungkook’s name- like he full on expected this to be about him.
I told him about how Hani appeared and shouted. And how Jungkook saw the whole thing yet invited her to stay with us. I told him I didn’t want to be a third wheel. Throughout my rant/story he just nodded silently, occasionally taking his eyes off me to take a sip of his coffee.
“Now I get why you texted me. But my take on it is that your best friend is being a dick. Period. You’ve done a lot for him y/n. Clearly he can’t reciprocate those feelings and gestures, because he can take you getting screamed at by his girlfriend and think you’ll be fine with it.”I nodded slowly, wanting to disagree with him, but knowing he was right.
“Y/n”, he asked gently. “Am I your only friend other than him?” I swallowed the coffee, the warm sensation travelling down my throat, and nodded again. “Before I met you and Jungkook met Hani, we were with each other basically 24/7. That doesn’t really leave time to meet new people.” We both chuckled.
“But he still has 4 or 5 guy friends other than you?” Once again, all I did was nod. It was those very friends he had wanted me to go clubbing with.
I sighed. “I’m sorry for dragging you out here in this weather Tae.”
“Don’t be. I’m glad you did. Listen...did you ever tell Jungkook why we...?”
“Broke up? No. I just told him we had a heated argument and ended things.” Taehyung sighed in exasperation, leaning back in his seat. “He should know y/n.”
“Well I’m not gonna be the one to bring it up. His girlfriend is more than enough emotional blackmail.”
“OK,ok. One more question and then I’ll drop the subject. Do you like him as more than just a friend?”
There was a pause. “He’s taken.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
Another pause. Then, “No. He’s friend.” I had to force myself to say those words. “But I think I need a break from him. He has a girl he cares about and I’m really just getting in the way.”
“You’re just gonna distance yourself from him? Just like that?”
I smiled. “I thought that was the last question? But, yes, that’s the plan. He chose a girl who hates me Taehyung. Like, she full on despises me. I get so uncomfortable around the two of them when they’re together. I can’t keep this up anymore.”
Taehyung sighed, but didn’t agree or disagree. He knew when I had my mind set on something, I sure as hell did it. He knew from experience. “If only I decided to do this while we were still together, huh”, I smiled wryly.
“If only...”, his dark eyes met mine and we sat there in silence, staring at each other. My eyes scanned every inch of his face, taking him in. He looked good. Healthier. Completely the opposite of me- I looked a mess right now. Red eyes, scraggly hair.
He cleared his throat, breaking me out of my trance. “Shall we go? I’ll walk you home.” I nodded, getting up hastily, feeling my cheeks heating up from staring at him. I tried to hand him back his jacket, but he refused.
“It’s freezing out there and you’re still soaked. Keep it on.” I wanted to cry at how much of a perfect human being he was. And then I wanted to cry because I had let him go. For someone who didn’t even care about me anymore.
I linked my arm with his so we could both fit under his umbrella as we walked to my place. We idly chatted on the way there, about a manner of things. How uni was going, where he went yesterday with friends, some good food places I needed to try out.
We were interrupted by a car speeding past, carelessly driving over a pothole close to the pavement. It was filled with rainwater and Taehyung happened to be the one nearest the road, so he got soaked. I was laughing so hard, he had to support me using his arm.
“Not that funny”, he grumbled, even though he was laughing with me. I finally stopped cackling to resume the conversation, feeling lighter and...happier. “Haven’t you found anyone new then?” I boldly asked.
We walked a bit more before he answered. “...You can only find someone new after you move on y/n.” As he said this, we slowed to a stop outside my house. I looked up at him curiously. “You’re not”
“You are?”, he countered, biting back a smile at my flustered expression. “Well no, but-”
He cut me off with a delicate kiss. Despite the cold, the warmth of his lips was apparent as I applied more pressure, wanting more contact. I momentarily forgot where I was. I even forgot about Jungkook.
I pulled away to hug him. “Thank you Taehyung.” His chest vibrated as he chuckled. “I know the kiss was good but you don’t have to thank me for it.”
“Shut it”, I laughed. “I mean thank you for being amazing and helping me through this. You’re the best.”
He ushered me inside before I caught pneumonia. I invited him in, but he apparently was behind on coursework- so I hadn’t actually lied to Jungkook. Taehyung did need help on a project- just not from me. I went inside to shower, a grin still plastered on my face. Maybe this whole situation wouldn’t be so bad after all.
Over the next couple of weeks, I stuck to my word. Jungkook had texted numerous times, and my replies went from blunt, to none at all. I couldn’t pick up calls. He dropped by twice- one of the times I genuinely wasn’t home, and the other, I stayed silent. He gave up after ten minutes of banging on the e door and calling my name.
And also in those couple of weeks, I had got closer to Taehyung again. I would spend more time with him, chatting away, laughing our worries away. He knew I wasn’t using him and actually enjoyed his company. If I didn’t then he knew I would go back to Jungkook.
But I felt...not as weighed down, knowing I wasn’t burdening Jungkook’s relationship. Obviously, all those years worth of feelings don’t just go away like that, but I was feeling a lot better about it all.
It had been 2 weeks and 3 days when I next saw him. We had never gone that long without seeing each other. Ever. Taehyung hugged me goodbye after walking me home from uni. “I’ll come round later!” he had called. We had made a plan- he’d come to mine and we’d just lounge about and talk.
He loved to talk to me, and was great at keeping the conversation going. As usual, I waved him off, and walked in, ready to grab a snack and start my assignment. I had been putting it off for way too long and the deadline was next week.
But lo and behold, there was Jungkook, sat on my sofa when I walked in. I instantly stiffened when we made eye contact. His annoyed expression only added to the ever-growing tension in the room.
“You’ve been ignoring me. Why?” I placed my bag down and headed to the kitchen to grab a snack. My stomach was on the verge of rumbling.
“You’re doing it again! For two whole weeks I’ve waited y/n. Two weeks! We barely go two hours without talking. And why was Taehyung outside? Are you two dating again?”
I grabbed an apple, and turned to look at him. “Jungkook...”, I sighed. Just looking at him resurfaced all those feelings. And I didn’t want that. “I've been busy with...uni stuff”, I lied. “And no, we’re not dating.” That wasn’t actually a lie, we technically weren’t back together.
He scoffed, not believing a word. I knew I was being a coward, but over my dead body would I tell him how I actually felt. I don’t know how people mustered up the courage to straight up say to someone, “Hey, I like you.”
“It’s me, isn’t it?”, he asked softly. “I’ve done something to upset you. I saw you out there, laughing with Taehyung. And as soon as you saw me you stopped smiling.”
“Jungkook, you haven’t done anything. It’s...I was just surprised to see you in here. You never use the spare key, like ever.”
“I wanted to see you y/n. How do you expect me to go two weeks without seeing my best friend?” I clenched my jaw at the mention of those two words. “The same way I expect you to stick up for me when someone shouts at me”, I blurted out without thinking.
He froze. I clamped my mouth shut with my empty hand at what I had just said. Why the hell couldn’t I stay quiet? He knew instantly what I was referring to, seeing as he hadn’t seen me since that night.
“She apologised”, he mumbled, avoiding my gaze. I put the apple down, my appetite gone, and sighed. I was extremely passive and hated any conflict. “You’re right”, I said, blinking away the tears. “I’m just...well, you know how I get”, I forced a laugh.
“Y/n, I’m not stupid. There’s something else.”
“No there’s not”, I said, shaking my head a bit too enthusiastically. “I just have an assignment to start because Tae’s coming round later and I want to get a decent amount done.”
That was y/n-talk for ‘Fuck off’. All Jungkook said was ‘oh’. I checked the time on my phone. “You should get going Jungkook, Hani will get worried. You didn’t even have any classes today.” Yes, I knew his timetable off by heart- sue me.
“She’s out with a friend”, he replied, his eyes burning into me. “Y/n, you are acting really weird. Is everything OK?”
“Peachy”, I replied with a tight smile. I was still reeling from his ‘she apologised’ comment. Did he think it was as simple as that? Was he dumb enough to believe that was the first time she’d spoken to me like that? I was so mad, but also helpless. There was nothing I could do without it becoming an argument, so I stayed quiet.
“I missed you”, he sighed. It really seemed like he was trying to get a heartfelt response out of me. “I missed you too Jungkook. But really, I have work to do so-”
He literally lunged forward and wrapped his arms around me in a big bear hug. Two minutes in and I was struggling to breathe. “-Jungkook!”, I gasped, and he let go,
grinning. “That makes up for two weeks worth of hugs. I’ll go and leave you to work in peace, but if you don’t answer my texts, I‘ll be back!” I smiled and waved as he left the kitchen. As soon as the front door shut, the smile was gone. It had all been going swimmingly until he decided to show up.
My head whipped up from my laptop screen, when I heard banging on the door. “Y/n?” I glanced at the time, recognising the voice calling my name. It was Taehyung and he was almost a whole hour early.
I let him in and locked the door behind us. “Tae! You’re early”, I noted. I had actually got my head down and had been in full swing before he appeared. “Yeah”, he grinned. “Weren’t too busy were you?”
“Oh, nothing important”, I replied airily. “Just working towards my degree.” He chuckled and I sighed. After Jungkook left, I hadn’t cried, but if I spoke out lou about it, I wouldn’t be able to control myself. But Taehyung was here to vent to. so...
“What happened?”, he asked in a worried tone, edging closer to me. “Earlier when you dropped me home, Jungkook was already in here.” Taehyung’s eyes widened and I laughed, despite feeling upset. “No, he didn’t break in, he has a spare key.” I noticed that he had still taken the spare key with him when he left, which meant he could full well turn up again if I ignored him.
“He wanted to know why I was ignoring him..and I blurted out about how he didn’t stick up for me.” A tear fell as I continued. Taehyung stepped up to me, wiping at my cheeks with his thumbs. “And he justified it by saying she apologised.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Shh. It’s OK, he consoled me. “Don’t cry.”
“Sorry”, I sniffed. “I’m being stupid.” Taehyung travelled his hands down my sides and rested them on my waist. I “You’re not being stupid y/n. She treats you like shit. It’s not fair.”
“Why can’t he see that?” I sobbed. Taehyung’s grip slightly tightened on my hip. I peered at him through my tears. He looked angry, his eyes darkening. “I want to meet this Jungkook for myself”, he growled. The tears stopped flowing because of shock.
“Look at what he’s done to you. You’re crying over him and he’s completely fucking oblivious. Asshole.”
My eyes widened slightly. “Taehy-”
His lips crashed into mine, unexpectedly. He pulled back to mutter, “I hate seeing you cry”, before roughly pressing his lips back onto mine. My hands found the back of his neck as he kissed me. He was just kissing me- bit by bit, he was kissing the pain away.
He pushed me back onto the sofa and hovered above me, the anger now mixing with lust. My breathing was already ragged as I stared up at him. He lowered himself on me to continues kissing me, my neck my ear, my lips. I moaned slightly when he begun to grind into me. He nipped gently at my bottom lip.
“You want this?”, he asked. I think from my already wrecked form, it was apparent that I wanted this, but still I nodded. “If you promise you won’t cry again.” I nodded again, smiling this time. “I promise.”
He kissed me heatedly again, and my hands found my way beneath his shirt. He flung it off in an instant, eager to in turn remove mine. All our clothes were slowly being shed, not a care in the word as we stared at each other, wanting more.
My fingers entangled themselves in his hair as he lowered down, his fingers teasing me. “Taehyung!”, I gasped as he entered them without warning. He was muttering about how wet he had made me, and I was getting closer and closer- and then he pulled out. I gasped at the sudden emptiness and he smirked. “Can’t have you cumming just yet”, he spoke huskily.
He slowly lined himself up, and his forehead lowered to meet my own, as he slid into me. I gripped his shoulders at the pain mixing with the pleasure. It didn’t take long for him to start rocking into me, harder and harder until I could no longer remember my own damn name.
“T-tae”, I groaned, letting him know I was close. He was slamming into me, and not long after, I had reached my release. “Fuck!”, he gasped as he watched my features contorted in pleasure, reaching his own release not long after. He pulled out, aiming the liquid on my torso.
He collapsed upright on the sofa, the only thing to be heard was our heavy panting. He was the first to speak. “Wow.”
I sat up, to look for my shirt, trying not to laugh at his exclamation. “I missed that”, I kicked weakly at his thigh and he laughed, crawling over to hug me as I managed to slip the underwear back on too.
He stayed the night, the two of us on the sofa. I fell asleep in his arms and woke up to an empty sofa. He had left a note on top of my assignment work saying that he had a morning lecture and that he’d see me later. I smiled at the scrawled writing and got up, stretching my stiff limbs.
I stopped mid stretch, spotting something on the floor- Tae’s phone. He must have left in a rush, dropping it. I picked it up and placed it on the table. I’d probably see him later today, so I could give it to him.
As I picked it up, it started buzzing, and I almost dropped the phone from shock at the caller ID. Hani. Why the fuck was she ringing Taehyung. What confused me further was that her contact name was saved with a heart. I waited for it to stop vibrating in my hand, and without even an ounce of guilt, unlocked his phone.
I gulped as I opened the text messages between the two of them and slid down on the floor, my legs shaking. I was more in shock than anything else. But all I could thing was that the love of Jungkook’s life, wasn’t his Miss Perfect after all.
I was distraught. Jungkook was being cheated on. Taehyung had lied to me about not having anyone else. I hastily got up to get changed into something decent. I was going to see my best friend.
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hell yes there should be a part 2
Man right when that bitch's name popped up in knew I would hate her fucking guts but damn I was not expecting that ending WHY TAE YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD I HAD SO MUCH HOPE FOR YOU WHY😭😭😭
Wow you need to write the next part ASAP.!!! Its so good 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
I have a feeling y/n is gonna tell kookie about hani out of anger and kookie is going to break their friendship
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