MonstaTaco
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Monstrous Dinner(Special Guest Monsta X Edition Pt. 2)
Previously on Monstrous Dinner Pt. 1...

"Wonho, I know it's been a while since you've parted with your precious ramen, but seriously you gotta let it go, man. It's tearing you apart," Kihyun sighed, until he saw who Wonho was looking and gasped. The others took their eyes away from their food and nonchalantly said hello.

"OPPAAAAA," Minhyuk shouted, tackling the unknown guest. The guest nearly saw the holy ghost the way Minhyuk practically straddled him. "What the hell are you doing here and how did you get inside?!?" Kihyun shouted angrily. "The door was unlocked. You should be more careful. Gotta be safe these days. You don't want crazy people walking in, now do you? I was being a gentleman by personally telling you myself...plus I heard the word food." The stranger replied calmly, with a bow. Minhyuk beamed, "This man is great, looking out for us like that. Mom, can we keep him for free?" The others, too busy happily slurping their food, grunted in agreement. "NO, this isn't great! He just walked in without permission! You couldn't have knocked first?!??" "Whoops, excuse my manners. How could I forget?" The stranger shook his head in shame and made a knock knock noise, Trespass style. "Who is it?" Kihyun's motherly instincts couldn't help but kick in. "Jin. I'm not pizza delivery, but believe what I brought is better-me. Better?" "Better. YAAAAY" Minhyuk applaused so loud it was a surprise he didn't create a 10.5 earthquake. Jooheon jumped,nervously flitting his eyes back and forth and yelled, "Gah, don't do that, you know how I get scared easily! I thought that clapping noise was a possessed washing machine out to get me before we release a comeback." Everyone laughed, while I.M. asked if the machine was a female or male. "Why should it matter? the point is I was scared." "Female washing machines are nicer. I have one named Electric Queen And each time I put clothes in and turn it on, I always make sure to say it's time to party, baby. With a soothing pat. Never gave me problems ever since. You should try it. I don't recommend using Snuggly detergent. It hates that, that's probably why you have a possessed washing machine." "You're so weird," Jooheon snorted along with everyone else. "I am what I am," I.M. said with a wink. "So no one else is going to talk about how Jin got here, like it's perfectly normal?" Kihyun huffed, annoyed. "Unless we're talking about ramen or the lack of, nope," Wonho said. "Now I know what to give you for your birthday-a starship life-size supply of Ramen that will make you stop mentioning the word ever again." Minhyuk stated. "That's my boy, you make father so proud. You're growing up so fast..." Shownu sniffed. "He's already grown up," Hyungwon said. "Shhh, I will not believe such words. Lalalalalala." Kihyun sighed. "I need a drink, except I don't drink. Knock yourself out with the fruit snacks, I'm going to bed," he said, walking away. "Did I do something wrong?" Jin asked, confused. "No, he gets like that from time to time and says he needs space from humans sometimes. I think it triggered with the lack of missing We Got Married episodes since we've been on tour and recording a lot. Kdrama can do that to the unsuspected mind and hold you captive, you know." Shownu assured Jin with a fatherly pat on the back. "I wouldn't know since I'm usually eating when BTS isn't recording or touring. There's no such thing as overreating-professionals call it that, but I call it dedication with a meaning. And if someone tells you otherwise, they can kiss your fridge door, cus no one asked for their opinion. Besides, distance doesn't exist when it comes to food" Jin stated philosophically. "Damn, that was deep" Wonho said, the first sentence he uttered that didn't include ramen. "That almost made me forget about ramen." "And you know something's deep when even Wonho forgets about ramen," Hyungwon smirked. "I've been waiting for this moment ever since watching Eat Jin. You've always been my bias since day one," Minhyuk fangirled tearfully. "He keeps us up late at night constantly asking if we've seen the latest episode of what you ate, what food he'd make if he met you, and how you manage to have an appetite greater than the Golden Gate Bridge." Jooheon said grumpily "He even made a mixtape for you just in case. He's a walking emergency kit when it comes to this stuff and survival. The Boy Scouts better watch out cus they have new competition when it comes to Minhyuk." I.M. said. Minhyuk just stood there grinning while sizing up Jin like he was a shirt on sale for 50% off. Jin patted Minhyuk on the shoulder reassuringly and said, "I know how you feel cus I act the same way when it comes to Sunny from Girl's Generation. And you know I'm serious because this is the way I act towards food. My show says it all." Everyone gasped at his confession, while I.M.said, "LOOOOAD HAVE MERCY GIVE ME STRENGTH, OOOOH," pretending to fan himself while making the cross sign. Jin looked shocked as well and swore silently. "Shit, I meant to write that in my diary, not out loud. I-" "Good thing Minhyuk sleeps like a baby. More fruit snacks for me. He won't even notice," Jooheon's cackle woke Minhyuk up from his peaceful slumber and high kicked Jooheon in the stomach. "No one messes with my food. This is my territory, so back off, RedVine," Minhyuk glared at Jooheon while clutching his food prospectively like it was his newborn. Jooheon groaned while Shownu, I.M., Hyungwon, Kihyun, and Wonho fought the urge to laugh, looking as if they ate too much kimchi their stomachs could handle. "No fighting at the table, boys. Goddammit, Minhyuk, don't tell me you had that dream where Jin crashed our dinner again. You really need to cut back from sugar, it does the craziest shit to you. You know you can't take sugar in well. Fuck, I need a drink. I need the most hardest liquor created. Jooheon, honey can you please pour me a cup, better yet give me the whole damn bottle?" Kihyun sighed, closing his eyes briefly. "After eating, all I want to do is sleep. You'll have to pour it yourself cus the only thing I'll be pouring is my blanket over me." Jooheon stood and said goodnight, making his way towards his room while the others followed. "Sometimes, I feel like I should do drugs, but then I think, better not," Kihyun said, clearing off the table and leaving Minhyuk alone. "Normal people will never understand the struggle of being a fanboy is. Especially when it comes to idols eating." "Did someone mention the word eat?" A voice behind him interrupted his monologue. Minhyuk turned around and spotted the man that haunted his dreams and ran to him. "OOOOOOOOOOOPPA," Minhyuk's voice woke up Obama from his peaceful slumber. Kihyun rushed towards them flash speed and whacked the intruder with a loaf of bread. "No ones messes with my children, bitch. Are you okay, Minhyuk? He didn't hurt you, did he?" Minhyuk rushed towards Jin who groaned, but was uninjured. "Mom, it's okay. It's Jin, I'm not on drugs, see? It's him!" Minhyuk screamed with excitement. Jin shook his head in daze and said,"How do you expect to protect your children with a loaf of bread? At least hit them with something harder like a cucumber." Jin said, while placing the loaf of bread in his jacket since after all, it was free food. "Sorry, sometimes I forget I'm not an actual mom and get carried away." Kihyun laughed with embarrassment. "It's fine, I'm the mother of BTS, I know exactly how you feel. Though next time, at least hit me with something more sugary like a candy bar that I can eat." Jin said passively like getting hit with a loaf of grain was as normal as going a day without kpop. "Since you're here, I wanted to ask you something only Minhyuk's hero could answer." Kihyun said fixedly. "Yeah, sure. Though if it's food, it has mulitple graves in my stomach. So I can't help you with that." Kihyun and Minhyuk laughed, but there was something a bit off in their voices, something hungry. "Minhyuk's birthday is coming up and the only thing he wanted was the person who's standing here now. And I was wondering, well, since you intruded our house, the least you can do is give my son what he wants. After all, mother wants what's best for their children." Kihyun's voice grew dark with a gleam in his eyes. Minhyuk, the ever happy ball of sunshine on drugs, was too busy thinking of the his potential present that could finally be his in a few weeks. A present that would be better than a new episode of Eat Jin, but the star himself. Yes, he would like that very much, he thought, smiling creepily into the distance. "Uh, I mean no offense and all, but I just came here for the food. Could I give him an autograph with a picture, and have some fruit snacks to-go instead?" Jin laughed nervously, creating distance between them. "If you comply by our rules, you can have all the fruit snacks and food you want. We know what you like to eat, at least my son tells me everyday." Kihyun and Minhyuk neared closer to him like a pack of lions surrounding its prey. "That's kidnap! And besides, I have a flight to catch in two days I can't miss. Dammit, why do I always get myself in situations caused by food?" Jin cried. "Technically, it's not kidnap since you voluntarily came here on your own. You mine as well stay. I promise you'll like it here. We're not BTS, but we'll make sure to make this feel like home to you. We'll even let you become a new member." Kihyun's grin widened as they closed in on him like an item they found during black friday. "Yes, you'll enjoy it here and get the attention you deserve. Mom makes great lobster." Minhyuk giggled with delight of all the things he'd finally get to do with his new brother. They leaned in closer, closer, closer until Jin couldn't escape even if he was on Man vs. Wild. His eyes flitted towards them panicking as their cackles filled his ears while desae, run, run, run played softly in the background to the theme of his horror. Run continued to blear loudly until it drowned out the cackling and looked up to see Minhyuk staring at him with a karaoke microphone in his hand. "Are you alright, Jin? I thought I lost you for a second. If you think you can pretend to sleep so you can avoid being beat by the queen of karaoke machine, you're wrong. It's too late to back out now." Minhyuk smiled with determination. "I just had a crazy dream where you and Kihyun tried to make me your birthday present, I got hit in the head with a loaf of bread, and I didn't even get to have any fruit snacks. It was scary. I-"Jin rocked back and forth, talking in fast forward speed, when Minhyuk waved a candy bar in front of him. "Breathe, Jin, that's right. Here's the sugar you've been waiting for wrapped in sexy lingerie just for you." Minhyuk spoke in a baby voice as if he was talking to a toddler. Jin woke from his small breakdown and tackled the candy bar, stuffing it in his mouth with a moan, instantly calming down. "Thank goodness candy was invented. It's the world's best medicine besides food and music. Thanks mom, for giving me life so I can enjoy food," Jin sighed with pleasure of the sugar working its way to his body and bound to pass out later. "What's life without a bit of sugar to make it more bearable?" Minhyuk nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry for you witnessing that. I just can't help it when anything involves food. It makes me turn into Hulk who can't find a meal that comes in his clothing size." Jin apologized, leaning his head on Minhyuk's shoulder. "I know, I know. I know exactly how you feel. It's an addiction you just can't stop and don't want to." Minhyuk said sympathetically. "Finally, someone who understands the struggle of going without food for 1.5 seconds. It's not fun at all." Jin said with a sniff. "Not at all." Minhyuk agreed. They remained silent for a while, Minhyuk rubbing Jin's back comfortly until he finally spoke up. "My birthday is coming up though. It's not too late to make it reality. After all, last time you forgot to give me a present. Consider this as an I-owe-you," Minhyuk grinned sweetly at Jin. "You guys can come out now, our mission for operation jin sensation was a success." Minhyuk spoke into the empty room, or so Jin thought. Suddenly a beehive in the form of Monsta X made their way towards him in a calculative formation, their usual aegyo, laughter, and emotion erased from their faces. Minhyuk's grip tightened as they approached him with fruit snacks, a laptop, duct tape, a DVD collection of We Got Married, and a bag of kimchi. "This is for eating the chocolate cake you made on my birthday and had the nerve to not at least save a slice." Minhyuk said with no remorse. "That was two years ago! And I'm sorry, but you should never trust a person to have self control when it comes to food. Especially when they have a bachelor's degree in all things food. We've been through so much and you're just going to throw it away for cake? Self resistance is non existent at that point. If you let me go, I'll pick you up a rice krispies treat, which is just as good," Jin tried to reason. "Too late. Two years that included you eating my fridge and the food you gave where the only food left was a crumb and empty wrapper. You had your chance. Payback's a bitch. Any last words?" Minhyuk stated coldly. "Can I at least have some fruit snacks? I mine as well go down with sugar since it turned out to be my worst enemy. And you know what they say-keep your friends close, and your enemies closer." Jin stated philosophically. "Nope, you will feel exactly what I felt when I watched you eating life wrapped in donut boxes and other spongey treats that didn't live long because of you. Buckle up, princess. I brought an industrial sized bag of fruit snacks just for this day." Minhyuk grinned devilishly, as Monsta X inched closer to him with the promise of food numbing pain to come and a realization that they were the real life versions of Pretty Little Liars in idol form. "Shit, I really need to cut back on my sugar intake if shit like this keeps happening," Jin said, done with life.

~Fin~

Thank everyone for joining Monsta X on this Monstrous dinner and poor Jin getting involved in a cycle of crazy situations all in the name of food. Did Minhyuk and Kihyun's dark side scare you? And is it just me, but are you craving fruit snacks? I'm still new to writing fanfic, so it may have came out a bit rushed and just a little bit crazy, but then again that pretty much sums up me. But no regrets, cus being normal is so overrated. Weird is the new black. Cheers to being weird. Cheers for kimchi. Cheers for music and jams that keep us sane.

There's no such thing as pizazz, if it doesn't include music's ass. XD

Is it weird I can actually picture them as a family while Kihyun is a proud trophy wife dressed in a floral apron while holding her "sons" in one arm with a bottle of root beer in the other as a substitute for beer? And Shownu as the chill dad who's slightly scared of his wife when she shows her bad side and pretty much in control of the household? Cus I'm jealous Jin got to witness that.

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