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Hello everyone! Chapter 11, yay! Thank you to everyone who is reading my story, I hope it's enjoyable. I will continue to try my best. There is a trigger warning for this chapter. I will explain it further down. I will make sure that people can skip it if they need to and I will add a short summary of what they missed before the chapter continues. I apologize if it is choppy. Yellow warning sign means that that is where it starts, green checkmark means it's over.
Disclaimer: Many of the characters aside from BTS are made up. And, of course, I don't know BTS personally so their personalities are probably mostly fictional.
Character thoughts are in { }, words in English are bolded, and for a small section < > is what Rose is dreaming. It does switch back and forth a bit between her {thoughts} and her <dreams> because she's stuck in the dream and comments to herself. I originally wrote this story using italics, but italics don't work in Vingle, so I've had to improvise. I apologize if it is confusing. Let me know if you would like to be tagged in future chapters. Please forgive me for any mistakes I make and I hope you enjoy!
Beginning: Chapter 1
Previous: Chapter 10
Word Count: 3367 (sorry for the long chapter)
Warning: Does contain some language. ***ALSO*** Trigger warning: The dream sequence contains language and violence/abuse/torture.
Yoongi POV
I finished getting ready first. I wanted to quickly check up on Rose without Namjoon bothering me about it. I cracked the bedroom door open to see what Rose was doing. She was laying down on the couch, but I could see her holding up her phone. {She really doesn’t want to go to sleep, does she? I don’t know why she’s so adamant on not sleeping, it’s easy to tell how much she needs it}. Jungkook was right, she didn’t look bad, {I don’t think she could ever look bad}, but anyone could tell she needed sleep. I heard Namjoon finishing up in the bathroom so I quietly shut the door and laid down on Jin’s bed, which was mine for the night.
“All done?” Namjoon asked walking out of the bathroom and towards light switch. I grunted and turned over. Namjoon turned off the light and made his way to his bed. He sighed as he laid down. {Please don’t talk about her anymore}.
“What?” I asked shortly.
“She’s something, isn’t she?” {He’s just trying to provoke me}.
“Who?” I asked trying to sound tired and disinterested.
“You know who. Don’t play dumb.”
“Namjoon. I’m not in the mood.”
“We got really lucky getting her to be our tutor,” he continued, ignoring me.
“Whatever. Can we sleep now?” I was starting to get pissed that he wasn’t taking the hint.
“Do you like her?” I couldn’t answer. I didn’t know the answer. {I think I like her. But I shouldn’t like her. I can’t like her. I think I do. But I don’t know. And it doesn’t matter, because I shouldn’t. Whatever I feel, I have to stop already like her...and she likes you...and that hurts... I shouldn’t be mixed up in this. I’ll hurt too much}.
“You do, don’t you?” Namjoon asked rhetorically. He didn’t sound mad, he sounded like he was just reciting a fact.
“No. I don’t. Now let me go to sleep.”
“Hmm. If you say so.” He didn’t sound like he believed it. I didn’t care. Namjoon could think whatever he wanted. After about ten minutes, I could hear him start snoring lightly. Ugh! Snoring. Normally, his snoring didn’t bother me, I could tune it out easily. But something else was keeping me awake. All I could think about was what he had asked me earlier: ‘Do you like her? You do, don’t you?’ I was trying to reason with my brain for about half an hour. After that didn’t work, I spent the next half-hour trying to stop thinking about it so I could go to sleep. When that still didn’t work, I decided to get a glass of milk. Maybe that would help me sleep.
I got out of bed and had my hand on the doorknob when I heard a weird noise. I looked around the room. It wasn’t coming from in our room. {The living room?} I opened the door a crack and heard it more clearly. It sounded like a whimper. {Is that Rose? Is she okay?} I started opened the door wider and was about to step out when I saw person moving from the hall to the couch. One of the other boys must have heard her. {Who is that?}
The only light was coming through the windows on the far side of the living room so I couldn’t make out who it was. I froze as the person reached the place where Rose was sleeping. He leaned over and started to shake what was probably her shoulder. I couldn’t see over the couch. The whimpering got louder for a second before she jolted awake. She shot perfectly upright. It looked like she didn’t realize where she was, she threw herself away from the person sitting by her and whimpered. The person next to her said something softly, I couldn’t hear what it was. After a moment, she realized where she was.
“H-h-hos-seok-ah?” Rose’s voice was shaking. {So it was Hoseok. But why does she sound so pitiful. What happened?} I was about to walk out to her when he wrapped his arms around her. She leaned into him, her forehead on his shoulder, and started sobbing quietly. I felt angry and sick. I was angry that Hoseok was hugging her. Angry at myself that I was angry at him for comforting her. Angry that I felt angry at all. And I felt sick that she was suffering, that she was crying—and that I wasn’t the one helping her. I could hear Hoseok saying something to her. She leaned away from him and he let go of her so he could wipe the tears away. She let out a quiet laugh before she wiped at her own eyes. He kept talking to her and she was nodding her head.
I could tell that he was trying to cheer her up. Our J-Hope was the joy of the group. He was always the one to help us when we were feeling depressed or tired. Rose was talking with him now. He stood up and turned on the light in the kitchen. It was the only light they could turn on that wouldn’t show brightly under any of the rooms’ doors. I stepped back and shut the door to where I could barely see out. She still had tears in her eyes, but she wasn’t crying anymore. {Leave it to Hoseok}.
It made me smile to see that she wasn’t crying anymore. But it kind of hurt that I wasn’t the one making her feel better. I wanted to go out there, but I guessed that they chose the light they did because they didn’t want to wake up anyone. She probably didn’t want anyone else to see her like that. I quietly sighed and pushed the door closed. I headed back to bed. {I guess this is why she doesn’t like to sleep. She’s afraid. She probably has those nightmares all the time. But I won’t say anything. I’ll let her look strong. That’s what she wants. If she ever decides to say something… then I’ll listen. Until then…} After a few minutes, I finally started drifting to sleep.
Rose POV
<It was so dark. I could barely see a sliver of light at the bottom of the blindfold. The blindfold was so tight it was hurting my eyes and giving me a headache. Of course, the headache was nothing compared to the pain of the ropes cutting into the flesh of my wrists. The duct tape over my mouth prevented me from taking full breaths.> {Not again. It’s just a dream. Wake up! WAKE UP!} I couldn’t wake up. Sometimes I could wake myself up and sometimes I woke the end... {Please let me wake up before the end}. <I didn’t hear anyone else in the room.> {Of course you don’t, they weren’t here yet. They thought you were still knocked out.}
<I started to hear voices slowly getting louder. They were walking towards the room I was in. I tried moving my wrists that were tied behind the chair. It only made the pain worse and ropes wouldn’t loosen at all.> {Stop trying, you know how this happens. Why do you have to fight every time?} Even though I always knew it was a dream, I could never change what happened. And I couldn’t help but fight it. The fear part of my brain always overwrote the rational part of my brain that knew it was a dream. And it always felt so real. Just like when it happened.
<The voices were just outside of where I was. The panicking got worse. I struggled against the ropes and they continued to cut further into my skin. I could feel the blood trickle down. It hurt so much, but I couldn’t stop.> I knew what was going to happen next. <I heard the door open and stopped moving my wrists. My breathing became shallow. Tears that had escaped the blindfold rolled down my cheeks. The men started laughing.>
<“Told you she’d cry,” one of them sneered. That voice sounded familiar, but I couldn’t place it.>
<“Whatever. We didn’t shake on it.” The other man’s voice was deeper. These bastards were betting on whether I would cry or not. I was still scared, but I was also getting angry. They both started laughing. Not a pleasant laugh, the kind that made my skin crawl. I heard one of them walking towards me. He stopped just in front of me. Suddenly, he tore off the blindfold. I glared at him, my eyes full of anger and hatred, trying to cover for the fear I knew must be showing at least a little bit.>
<At least I knew why he sounded familiar, he was the guy from the store. He was tall and a bit stocky with windswept-style black hair. He had approached me in the store just an hour or so before I blacked out. He told me that he had seen me around town before and that he had been trying to work up the courage to ask me out. “So here I am,” he had said. He was good-looking and looked to be about my age. Most high school girls would probably have been flattered and flustered, but I was already doing too many extracurricular activities and was almost done getting ready to graduate early.>
<And...there had been something about him that... rubbed me the wrong way. I wasn’t able to place it, but there was a voice in my head telling me to stay away. I told him that I was sorry, but I wasn’t looking for a relationship. Now I understood the look he gave me: angry, then arrogant. The man saw the look I was giving him and backhanded me so hard that he knocked me and the chair over. One side of my face burned from his hand, the other side felt like I had broken something. I couldn’t help the whimper that escaped.>
<The second guy spoke up, “Hey, don’t ruin the merchandise. He’ll get mad if we kill another one.”>
<“Don’t worry,” he sat the chair up, “I won’t kill her. I’m just gonna fuck ‘er up. She deserves it. Stupid bitch.” He hit me again. And again. And again. I wished the pain would make me black out.> Sometimes, this is where I would wake up. But it looked like that wouldn’t happen this time. {Will the dream continue, or will it repeat tonight?} <He kept hitting me, sometimes punching me. The pain was too much, I couldn’t even scream, just whimper. He grabbed my hair and started to yank me up off the chair—>
[brief recap: Rose has a dream where she's tied to a chair and blindfolded. Blindfold is taken off and there are two men, one of whom she recognizes, who proceed to beat her with a warning of 'don't ruin the merchandise'. Dream cuts off as she's being yanked by her hair]
I woke up to see someone sitting next to me, their hand still on my arm. {No no no, I woke up into another dream}. I shot up from where I was laying and flung myself away from the person. I couldn’t breathe properly, so all I did was whimper.
“Noona. It’s me. It’s ok. You’re ok. You’re safe,” Hoseok softly spoke.
When my body caught up with my brain, I was able to speak, “H-h-hos-seok-ah...” I could still feel the remnants of the dream lingering. Hoseok pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around me. He felt so warm, so real. I could finally breathe. I leaned into his shoulder. I couldn’t help it when the sobs finally escaped, but I didn’t want the other boys to hear so I tried to be as quiet as possible. He rubbed my back and said, “Don’t worry. Everything’s ok. Your Hope is here.”
I leaned away from him. I had to see the look on his face, there was no way he could say that and still keep a straight face, and yet he did. Hoseok put his hands on my cheeks and used his thumbs to wipe away my tears. {This is bad. I look so pathetic. I didn’t want anyone to know and then here’s Hoseok comforting me}. He gave me his patented smile and I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as I wiped the rest of my tears away.
“If you want to talk about it, I’m here. If you don’t want to talk about it, I’m still here. Just remember that whatever it was, it was just a dream, it wasn’t real.” Hoseok had a surprisingly calming voice. Normally when I hear him, he’s being loud and silly. But now... it feels like a hot bath after a long day. It was so nice and peaceful.
“It was real. Once.” I couldn’t see Hoseok’s face well, but I saw his eyes widen in surprise. I’m sure he probably thought it was just a bad dream like what most people have. But it wasn’t. It was a memory. A memory that I relive every time I fall asleep. Sometimes it changes a little bit; sometimes worse things happen in the dream, sometimes it’s not as bad, and sometimes, when it gets to the end, it gets truly terrifying. The only people who knew about my dreams were my immediate family, Julie, Nina... and someone who was my friend a long time ago.
“Can I turn a small light on? I want to be able to see you when I talk to you. Is that ok?” I nodded my head. Hoseok got up and turned a light on in the kitchen. The light helped to wake me up and dispel the last of my nightmare. Hoseok sat back down. I cocked my head, {I swear I heard something}. I started looking at the boys’ rooms to see if anyone else had woken up. All the doors were closed. {Must be the lack of sleep, I’m starting to hear things}. Hoseok turned around and started trying to follow where my gaze had been. “What? What’s wrong?”
I shook my head. “Nothing. I thought I heard something, but I was just imaging it.”
“Dream’s still stuck in your head?” I nodded my head. He sighed, “I really wish you could get some sleep.” I made a noise of agreement.
“Well, not just sleep, rest. I usually feel more tired after waking up.”
“I can imagine.” He gently grabbed my hands. “Well, I guess I can’t imagine. But the sentiment’s the same.”
I smile. “Thanks Hobie-ah.”
He laughed. “We’re at nicknames now, huh?”
“Ah,” I pulled my hands back. “Sorry, it’s just—never mind.”
He grabbed my hands back. “Nonono, don’t take it like that. I was going to say I like that. Plus, I’m guessing not many people have seen you like this, right? I feel special. I know something that most people, especially Namjoon and Yoongi-hyung, don’t know.” I pulled a hand free and used it to push his shoulder. I was hoping he couldn’t see me blush.
“Yah! Why did you say it like that?”
“Riiiiighttt,” he rolled his eyes. “Why in the world... You’re closest with them, aren’t you?” {Please let that be the only reason you say that. I don’t want anyone to notice how I feel about Yoongi}.
“I’m close with Namjoon at least. He’s a really great friend. Yoongi though, I have no idea about him. I try to be nice but... I think he really dislikes me.”
“Why’s that?”
“Well, when everyone texted me, he was the only one who didn’t. And he’s been pretty cold to me... I’m not sure what I did... but I guess it doesn’t really matter.” He smirked at me. He had that ‘I know something you don’t’ look. “What?”
“Nothing. Namjoon’s a friend, and hyung doesn’t like you... You’re a little dense, aren’t you?” I smacked his shoulder.
“That’s not nice,” I laughed. He joined me.
“But it looks like I’ve done my job.” I gave him a quizzical look. “You’re feeling better?”
{I am. I can’t believe he actually got me to forget, for however short a time}. “You really are their sunshine, their hope, huh?” He laughed. He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into a hug again. {This feels so good. So warm. I could stay like this...}
I heard his voice from far away, “Are you falling asleep?”
“Mm,” I responded. I felt his chest moving, he was laughing again.
“You’re gonna hurt yourself if you fall asleep in this position.”
<He grabbed my hair and started to yank me up off the chair, but my hands were still bound behind it. That didn’t stop him from pulling. It hurt so—> I jolted myself awake, startling Hoseok. “Are you okay?”
“Mm. Sorry, that’s what usually happens. If I try to sleep afterwards, I go right back in. I was hoping that this time...”
“Well, if that’s the case, I’ll help keep you up.” He was trying to sound hyper, but I could see him try to keep his mouth closed as he stifled a yawn.
“No need for that Hoseok-ah. I know you guys work yourselves too much. You need sleep.” Hoseok started to protest. “No ‘buts’. Go back to bed Hobi. I’ll be fine. Namjoon confiscated my laptop, but I still have my phone. I can at least watch some Running Man.” I could tell he was torn. He wanted to stay and make sure I would be okay, but he was also really tired. I stood up and pulled him up with me. I turned him around and started gently pushing him towards his bedroom door. His feet were resisting so I poked him in the side and made him jump and squeal.
“No fair!” he whisper-yelled since we were just outside the door.
“That’s what you get for not listening to your noona!” I giggled. He smiled warmly at me. “Now, go to bed. I’ll be fine and I’m sure I’ll have company soon with whoever gets up first.” He sighed. “But thank you Hoseok. Even though I was freaked at first, you made me feel a lot better than I usually do after I wake up. I usually end up getting stuck thinking about it for the next hour or so. So thank you.” I hugged him tightly and as I let go I gave him a quick peck on the cheek. It almost looked like he blushed.
He seemed flustered for a second, but then he was back into playful mode. “Next time, noona, you can just kiss me on the lips. I promise I won’t tell anyone—including Namjoon or hyung.”
I laughed. “First of all, don’t push your luck. Second of all, why do I care—“ he quickly opened the door and shushed me. I mouthed “You brat” and he stuck his tongue out at me. I glared at him and he silently laughed as he shut the door. I walked back and plopped down on the couch. “That little brat...” I muttered under my breath. I pulled my phone out and started my journey to keep myself entertained.
Hoseok POV
I laid down on the bed, making sure to not make any noise. I put my hand to my cheek where Rose had kissed me. My heart started beating fast again as I thought about it. {It’s just cuz she’s a girl. That’s all. If any other girl did that, I’m sure I’d do the same thing... If the girl was as pretty as her...or as smart as her...or as kind...or as loveable...} I violently mussed my hair. {Ugh! Who am I trying to convince anyway?! I already know how I feel. But I can’t do this. It’s already bad enough with those two. I shouldn’t add to it. The guys said I was just messing with her because that’s what I do. And even though, that is what I do, there was something else there}. I tried to blank out my mind. But that was hard because I couldn’t stop thinking about that look of pure terror on her face when she first woke up. {‘It was real once’... What had happened to her? What had she gone through?} This would be a long night—or I guess morning by now.
So, there's the chapter. More of Rose's past is revealed. Any surprise as to why she doesn't want to sleep after what happens? As for Hoseok...I wasn't originally planning on involving him in the little love battle going on, but in a further chapter, he wrote himself right in. It fit too well for me to take it out. So I had to go back and change some stuff in previous chapters. So glad I didn't post the chapters till I was done writing.
Well, I hope you're all enjoying the story. I don't think there is another trigger warning for a while.
So let me just say thank you to everyone who's reading, liking, following, commenting, or asking me to tag, it's very encouraging. Please don't hesitate to ask questions or comment. Constructive criticism is always welcome. I hope you will continue to enjoy my story and I hope to see you next chapter!!!
Tags: <3<3<3<3<3
@Mavis2478 thanks for that, I'm glad you feel that way. @JaxomB you have no idea. While he was the only character that wrote himself in, there were scenarios that wrote themselves. Made themselves more drama, lol
Legit starting to ship Hoseok and Rose XD
Don't you hate it when your characters just write themselves in to the story without your permission? Good job.
@Izzy987 I know, right? I think that's why he wrote himself in. They were too cute together I guess, lol
don't apologize for the long chapter. The longer the chapter, the better😉