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His Angel. Part 7: I Thought They Told Me Everything?

Sorry this took so long 😅
Jimin's POV I could already feel the power from her blood surging through my veins as my charcoal black wings cut through the air. I took several strong and sharp strokes, letting my wings capture the air and push it away, until finally letting myself glide steadily across the dark sky. By this time Namjoon had probably found out that I had been at Ara's house the whole time. Idiots. Do they really think I wouldn't go near her? I swooped through the window that Yoongi and Jungkook had crashed out of, bringing my wings in as I did and landing perfectly on my feet. "Welcome home boss." Jungkook said as he lazily laid on the couch. "Did you accomplish what you wanted?" I smirked and dug something out of my pocket. "Ya, it was easy. I drank her blood and then wiped her brain again. I even took some of her mom's blood for you guys." I threw one vile I had hidden away to Jungkook. He opened one eye and caught it easily, smirking as he opened it and gulped down half of the contents. I laughed to myself as his eyes became scarlet red as the unbelievable sensation of the Angel's blood spread out through his body. I turned my head towards the hallway, hearing an almost inaudible sound and saw Yoongi run into the room. I dug out another vile and threw it to the his hands and watched as he drank the whole thing in one gulp. Yoongi instantly grinned evilly, his personality changing completely as he cocked his head the side slightly as he covered his whole body in flames and disappeared. Jungkook cursed to himself and got up. "Should I go find him?" I laughed and rested my shoulder on the wall, crossing my arms. "No, let him go. Let him kill a few people for blood. You know how he gets once he tastes angel blood." I said. Jungkook smirked and flopped back down, resting his feet on the couch. "Ok, but you're the one that always complains that we can't stay in the human world for so long because of Yoongi's killing habit." He sighed, closing his eyes. I rolled my eyes and pushed myself off the wall. "It's because we're not staying in the human world for long that I'm allowing him to kill a few people." I snapped. Jungkook cocked an eyebrow up, jolting up from his position. "We're not staying?" looking at me surprised. "Obviously not, we only came to get my girl back." I said. Jungkook got up and shot out his own black wings. "Then if we're not staying I'm going to go out." He said hurriedly, walking to the broken door. "Where are you going?" I demanded, stepping towards him. I didn't need Jungkook killing people too. Not that I cared about human lives or anything, but I didn't want to draw attention to us. Jungkook chuckled and turned his head my way, flashing his fangs. "Don't worry, I'm just going for a bite since when we return we'll only be feeding on dead people." I sighed and waved him away. "Ok, whatever" Unlike the two of them I don't feed on multiple people. I only have one person that sustains me, and since I made her agree to be mine without using my hypnosis she's now bonded to me. Even if I wanted to drink someone else blood, I couldn't. I smirked as I walked to the other side of the house. Now there is nothing that stupid angel can do. Once a devil has bonded to someone the only way to break it is to kill him and I doubt Namjoon knows how to kill a devil. I walked into my bedroom and sat down on the bed. All I have to do is call to Ara and she will come running towards me. I lifted up a picture frame that I had on my bed and lifted up. It will be just like old times, when we were friends. Namjoon's POV "I'm a what?" Ara said, almost seeming like she was choking on own her own words as she looked at me surprised. I nervously scratched the back of my head as I looked down at her. This was pretty much going how I planned. I'm surprised that she isn't mad at me. Well, it wasn't my idea to keep the truth from her, so she shouldn't be mad at me. But, I did steer clear of her for a few days, but I don't think she's mad at me for that anymore, since she did hug me back. Maybe she's more shocked then mad at this point? "You're a angel." I said again. She frustratedly put her hands on her head and started to walk around the room. "So, I have a guardian angel, Devils after me, and I just found out that I'm an angel. Anything else?" I stood there awkwardly, putting my hands in my pockets. Um, I love you? I so badly wanted to tell her that. I've waited five plus months to tell Ara. I even broke down a door and chased after two Devils out of my rage that I couldn't tell her, but now looking at her and having the opportunity to tell her maybe this wasn't the right time. She already has things to think about. It killed me to think this way, but it probably was true. I simply shook my head in response. "No, that's pretty much it." I internally sighed and looked down. This really sucks. Ara's POV "Then if you don't mind I think I'll go up to my room then." I sighed and started to walk to the stairs. "Wait, you don't even know where your room is." Namjoon said, starting to walk towards me. "Oh, thanks..." I said, my checks starting heat up only a little bit from embarrassment. I promised my parents that I wouldn't be mad, and I wasn't really. I guess I get why they did it. I think. I'm just thinking at this point what Jimin will do or what he's already done to me. My memories still haven't surfaced even with Namjoon telling me, so it kind of scared me. What exactly did Jimin do to me? Namjoon stayed silent as we walked just like last time and I casually saw the rest of the guys in their own rooms. Namjoon opened a door at the end of the hallway and stood back. "Here, my room is next door, so if you need anything." He said, pointing to the door next to mine. "Uh, thanks." I replied, walking in. Unlike last time though Namjoon didn't come in, but instead turned away and walk to his own room. I slowly walked back to my bed and sat down. I couldn't help but feel a little bit lonely. Was it because Namjoon wasn't standing in the room with me? But, he didn't even stay for that long last time. I groaned and flopped down, looking at the digital clock on the dresser. It was already late and I wasn't even tired. "I should probably sleep though, so I'm not on a weird sleeping schedule...." I mumbled, pushing myself off the bed and standing up. I weirdly found my bags already in my room and I quickly ruffled through them to find my pajamas and quickly climbed back into bed, pulling the coverers over me. But, sooner then expected I feel asleep my mind started to replay another memory. -The school bell rang loudly, and I jolted up from my seat. Where am I? I hesitantly looked around and found myself back in high school. Students shuffled all around me trying to get out of the classroom as soon as possible, but I just sat in my seat blankly. What was I doing back in high school? It seemed like it was the end of the day, since no new kids were coming in and I soon found myself all alone. "Ara!" I heard a males voice suddenly call out to me. Wait, his voice sounds familiar. I turned my head in the direction of the noise and found a younger looking Jimin walking up to me, smiling as he waved to me. "Jimin! What are you doing here!" I yelled, getting up from my seat. He frowned and scrunched up his eyebrows, getting closer to me. "I go to school here." I widen my eyes and froze in place. "What are you talking about? You're a devil." Jimin looked at me even more confused. "Ya, and?" And what? You're a devil. I internally screamed and started to walk away, trying to get away. "Um, I think I need to go. My 'brother' is looking for me." I said, trying to maneuver around him. It didn't work and Jimin grabbed my wrist." What are you talking about? You don't have a brother." He said, stepping towards me. I squirmed in his tight grasp, trying to get free. "Please let me go." I pleaded. Jimin looked taken back and let go. "What's up with you?" He said. "I don't want to be kidnapped by you again." I said, rubbing my wrist. Jimin instantly looked down and gently grabbed my hand. "Did I hurt you? Sorry, sometimes I can't control my strength." I felt my heart rate suddenly speed up as he lightly stoked my hand, looking for any bruises. "Um, no." I mumbled softly, slowly taking my hand and clasping it nervously in front of my chest. What is he doing? I thought he was supposed to be evil? "Ara, are you ok? You're not acting like yourself. I wouldn't kidnap you." He said, laughing a little. "I know you're an angel and stuff, but we've been friends for years. It didn't seem to bother you then." He knows I'm an angel and he doesn't want my blood? "Uh, sorry I'm just a little stressed." I lied. Maybe I should just go with the flow for now? This is a dream so it's not like he can hurt me. Besides this is giving more information about my past. Jimin looked at my curiously, not believing my excuse. "Ok then, come on. The guys are waiting for us." I nodded and slowly followed him out. Outside stood two more guys that were casually resting on the lockers. As we walked up they smiled at us. "Took you long enough." A guy with mint green hair grumbled, pushing off the lockers. "Sorry Yoongi." Jimin said, smiling slightly. I smiled slightly to him too and watched as the other guy suddenly slung his arm around his shoulders and put him in a head lock, laughing hysterically as Yoongi cursed at him and tried to get free. "Get off me Jungkook!" He yelled, elbowing him in the ribs. The guy name Jungkook just laughed. "I'm going to bite your arm off if you don't." Yoongi warned, baring his fangs. I gasped and took a step back. He's a devil too!?! "Ya, right." Jungkook joked, showing his own fangs. Jimin then abruptly intervened. "Put your fangs away, we're still in school!" He silently yelled at them. Jungkook instantly let go and retracted his fangs. "You're no fun Jiminnie, You're just trying to show off to Ara." Jungkook said suddenly smiling mischievously. Jimin's cheeks started to turn red and I curiously looked up at him. Why was he suddenly embarrassed? "Shut up." He stuttered. Jungkook laughed and so did Yoongi, who weirdly didn't seem mad anymore. It was like he had two personalities. "Come on, let's go." Jimin said, walking in front of all of us.--- The next morning I woke up, snuggled in the covers of my new bed with the light of the morning coming in from the window that I was just noticing was in my room. But I didn't even care that it was blinding me as I stared at the wall blankly thinking of only one thing: I was friends with Devils?
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woooaahhhhh what??? JIMIN NOOOO SHE BELONGS TO NAM JOON
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"He said that you agreed to drop the charges if I went to court mandated therapy and continued with my medication." "Are you going to do it?" He sighed, you wanted him to agree to it. You wanted your father back, you didn't want to lose him. The truth of it all was that he attacked you and even if you hadn't provoked him he probably still would've attacked you. He may not have tried to kill you though. The look on his face told you that he didn't want to do it which annoyed you because you were giving him a chance to fix this. You were always giving him another chance, you probably shouldn't have but you did for the sake of him being your family. "Look I'd really rather not have to press charges against you for attacking and nearly killing me. Not to mention I was in a coma for three days. You don't deserve this option but I'm giving it to you." "Why are you? After everything I've done to you. How I've ruined your life, I've hurt you in more than one way so why give me the option of getting out of paying penance?" He asked. "No, you're not getting away with it. You'll have community service, you'll be paroled and you'll have to speak to a therapist. These are things that you have to do to avoid prison so you're still paying for your assault." "But it's not what you want." "How do you know what I want," you snapped at him. The guard asked you to calm yourself or he would have to escort you out. You took in a deep breath and looked back at your father. "All my life it's always been about what you want. Hell I'm getting a degree in business management because you refused to allow me to be a teacher. I had to be something far more sophisticated. You've never once asked me what I want." "Then what do you want Y/N?" "I want a life. I want normal, loving parents that care about me. I want my family back." He shook his head, "We're too broken." "Not so broken that we can't fix it. Look, you and mom are never getting back together I know that. I've never even considered that as an option when I was growing up but we have a chance right here and now to fix this. I can't do this by myself." He looked away, his guilt was painted all over is face. "Papa please." You begged. Your pleading was innocent and child like. His eyes shined with the first sign of a tear. You could see hurt in him just as much as he could see it in you. There was silence between you two for a while, you had no idea what he was going to say. It felt like time had stopped and the room had gotten colder than before. "How can you still see me as your father? After everything I've done to hurt you." "Because you're all that I've got-- Despite the abuse, you tried. You have an illness and you may not be able to cure it but you can maintain it." "Even after I've projected all my hatred of your mother towards you?" "Do you hate me papa?" You asked. The question silenced you two again but this time left you sick as you waited for the answer. You wished Junmyeon was with you but it wouldn't have changed how you felt. It might've lessened the blow though. "All I see is your mother. I don't think I'll ever be able to properly love you the way I once did." Your heart sank deeply. You felt more alone now than before. You really wished Junmyeon was there to hold your hand. All you could do was nod at your father and bite your lip to keep tears from falling. The same routine, keep your feelings in, control them so he couldn't see how much he hurt you. You looked up at him and said, "Then just take the deal Inho." "Why?" "You can get better and then you can move on. You don't want me in your life, you hate me that much then fine. Just tell me one thing, all those times you begged me to not leave, to not go away because you couldn't lose me too- did you never mean it?" "I meant it." You weren't sure you could believe him. You looked away and placed the phone back on the hook. You left the room without looking back at him. You headed to Minseok's place in need of a friend or even better... Junmyeon. Junmyeon's POV Seohyun had called Junmyeon for a meeting out at starbucks. He didn't want to go until she decided to send him some pictures from the night he got drunk. Those pictures were going to be hard to explain to Y/N; he was afraid he might lose her. He went to Minseok to ask him for advice. He was the best person to ask in order to get a good insight on Y/N. "I told you not to mess around with Seohyun. She's dangerous." Minseok said. He rubbed the back of his neck like the whole situation was stressing him out. Minseok was right though, Junmyeon knew he never should've gotten involved with Seohyun long before he showed interest in Y/N. Minseok told him that she was spoiled rotten and she had ways of getting whatever she wanted. She was a dangerous woman that knew how to use her sexuality to get what she wanted, and when it wasn't her sex appeal it was her father's money. What's more is that she was smart and conniving so she rarely ever had a trail lead back to what she had done. There was a rumor floating around Uni that she had cheated on the entrance examen but no one could prove it, not even the school board. It was possible her family connections paid those people off so they didn't even look. The whole thing was corrupt and so was she but at the time they started hooking up, Junmyeon didn't care. Sleeping with Seohyun was fun, she was wild and adventurous. He enjoyed that she turned him on, that she knew how to touch him and get him to come hard. He ended up letting himself get roped into calling her his girlfriend and then he fell in love with Y/N. To Seohyun, Y/N wasn't supposed to be competition for her. She was just a girl, Seohyun didn't think Y/N's looks compared to her own. In a way, they didn't. Y/N was a different kind of beautiful to Junmyeon. She wasn't some lustful looking vixen that looked like she could seduce the world, she was girly and gentle but she had that magical look to her because of her large doe eyes. Every time he thought about her eyes he could feel his heart skip, he could get lost in her eyes alone. That's what he hated the most about her when they were at odds, that her eyes were alluring. If she had liked him from the beginning, if she had paid attention to him instead of giving him the cold shoulder, he wasn't sure that wouldn't have led him to eventually breaking her heart. Now that he had her heart, he was determined now more than anything to make sure he didn't lose her. Junmyeon let out a harsh sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. He stared at the pictures on his phone debating in his mind if he should show Y/N what Seohyun was trying to blackmail him with or if he should handle it on his own. He couldn't explain the pictures and he had no idea what he was supposed to do. Minseok said, "Don't go meet her." "You think she won't terrorize Y/N with these pictures? She saw us talking to each other at the cafe and she purposely mentioned we were dating to hurt Y/N. She purposely showed up at the house and staged it to look like we slept together so that Y/N would think we had-" "I believe she staged those photos as well. Think about it, there's no possible way she could've known that Y/N was going to walk in on you two together in such a compromising position. It's possible that while you were passed out she took those pictures so that she could blackmail you later." Minseok said. "I wish I knew what she wanted. It's not like she was in love with me." "No but when you broke up with her for Y/N she considered that as her losing and she doesn't like to lose. Hurting Y/N will mean she wins, which is why you shouldn't go. One way or the other, she'll find a reason to show her those pictures and she'll break her heart." "So you don't want me to show her?" Minseok smiled and shrugged, "That's up to you, however, I can handle Seohyun for you." "How's that?" Minseok tilted his head to the front door as if telling Junmyeon to follow him. They got into a cab and Minseok gave the driver Seohyun's address. He started texting someone while they were in the car. "Why are we going to her place?" He asked. "You'll see." The ride was longer than normal. Seohyun lived in a very nice neighborhood. Her family was important which explained why she was so spoiled. He could only imagine what it would be like to live with a family like hers. His grandparents were his only family left and they were gentle people that always looked out for him but they also taught him right from wrong. It seemed like Seohyun's family had paved a way for her to step on people and let her believe that as long as she didn't get caught she could own the world. She lived her life as though she were better than others and it was only those that were smart enough and strong enough that would survive and remain on top. All those weaker beings were beneath her and she had no problem stepping on them. Minseok's confidence as he led Junmyeon to Seohyun's front door made Junmyeon slightly nervous. He felt like Minseok had turned into some sort of mafia boss. While they were friends, he knew that he was doing all of this more for Y/N's sake than his own. When it came to her, Minseok got scary serious. Heechul was right, he loved her; it was pretty obvious. He was the closest thing to real family that Y/N had, it made sense why she always went to him for help. Someone came to the door only a minute or two after Minseok rang the door bell. The butler led them through the foyer to a large office and then left them alone to wait for someone to come in. Someone that Minseok said was expecting them. Minseok made himself comfortable in a chair in front of the desk and looked at Junmyeon. "Don't be surprised by anything that's said here today and more importantly don't say anything unless you're spoken to." Minseok said. Junmyeon looked at him curiously but nodded to show he understood. He had no idea what was about to happen though. He was starting to think Minseok was more dangerous than Seohyun. Several minutes passed when the office door opened up and in walked a grown man perhaps in his fifties in a dark suit with an all black tie. His hair was slicked back and there was a slight scar on the right corner of his lip. His eyes were small and dark, almost black and the creases on his face made his serious face look more grave than it needed to be. Junmyeon suddenly wondered if Minseok was in the mafia or some kind of gang just by how tense the air had gotten when he came into the room. "Mr. Kim, what is it that I can do for you?" The man said. This man must've been Seohyun's father. Junmyeon had never met him but Minseok apparently had. Junmyeon looked over at Minseok who wore a serious business like face that made Junmyeon nervous. There was no way Y/N knew about this side of Minseok. He wanted to know exactly what was going on but avoided asking any questions. "Mr. Song you know I hate using my connections to get what I want don't you?" Minseok stated. "I do, which is why I'm curious to find you here now." "It seems your daughter finds it appropriate to try and break my best friend's heart by staging photos with Junmyeon here. These photos she intends to use as blackmail which I find deeply unsettling. Especially if she's going to use them as a weapon to hurt someone I deeply care about. " "I have no sway over what my daughter does, I can assure you." "You may not control her but you can do something for me. You see, I don't like it when people hurt the ones I love and just recently she's gone through some very- traumatic experiences. If your daughter is intent on destroying her then I'll have no choice but to destroy you and I'm sure you're aware that I have the means to do so." Song swallowed, Junmyeon was impressed by how cold Minseok's voice became. He could make a man, that looked like he commanded a gang's moves like a game of chess, nervous. Minseok had never shown this side of himself before. He could only imagine what would happen to him if he hurt Y/N. Even if he didn't intend to do it, he was worried about what may happen. "I need you to get rid of those photos. Crush her phone if you have to, go through her computer drives make sure she has no way of sending those photos to my best friend. Or your company is going to experience a very difficult time." Minseok's threat was cool and collected. Song nodded with nothing else to say and Junmyeon and Minseok left the large home. Junmyeon stayed quiet until they were in an uber and headed back to their flat. "Okay, so are you going to tell me what that was back there?" He asked. Minseok chuckled, "That was influence. My father and Seohyun's father work together, that's why I warned you against hooking up with her. Song is into shady stuff and my father knows it. He uses me to collect that kind of information to make sure that the people he goes into business with are legit or if they'll be a risk factor. My dad bailed Song out of a large financial jam just by buying his company, or buying into it. They share stocks but my father has the majority so in the end all I need to do it expose Song's dirty dealings and my father will drop him from the company. No one wants to be publicly associated with a criminal after all." "Okay, so your dad is rich?" Minseok laughed, "Yeah pretty much. When me and Y/N were kids, our father's worked together until my dad started his own company. Over the years, he made moves to become even more powerful in the business world. When my parents divorced, my dad wanted to take me with him to train me but I begged him to let me stay close to Y/N. They didn't know I knew about her abuse even though I wanted to tell them. Y/n begged me not to say anything, she didn't want to be taken away from her father. I think I regret that most, perhaps I was being selfish too because I didn't want her to be taken away from me.... but me and my dad kept in touch. He was always a good guy." "Wow. So wait does Y/N know any of this?" "Nope, no one does. We keep it as secret as we possibly can so that I can do my job but live some what of a normal life near Y/N. Song will handle Seohyun but I'm serious about her Junmyeon, stay away from her." Junmyeon nodded. He was silent for a moment before he stopped and said, "If you have this kind of influence though and you're so protective of Y/N, why did you let Heechul get away with hitting her?" "I didn't. The night I found out I showed up at his place and we fought. I threatened him that if he ever put his hands on her again he'd never see the light of day. He said it was an accident, a reflex because she had slapped him first and he did regret doing it. I would've told him to stay away from her but I know Y/N. Anyone that hurts her, she erases them from her life, she learned that from her father. " "That's what I'm afraid of." Junmyeon sighed. "At least you truly love her. Heechul was only curious about her, that's why I never liked them together." "You don't think he liked her?" "He liked her but it wasn't the healthy kind of affection she needed. You already know that Y/N has that kind of gravity about her, people get pulled towards her, sometimes it's people she doesn't need in her life. Heechul being one of them. They're not compatible." "Are we?" Junmyeon felt they were but he asked Minseok because he was worried he felt the same about them. He loved Y/N, she loved him too but he wondered if that was enough. Was he capable of making her happy the way she wanted to be? He wondered what she was looking for. What was in her head? Would life lead them down two different paths? Would they end up like their mothers, being broken apart only to come back together and have an affair? "You two understand each other and that's important. You two love each other. I can't catch Y/N every time she falls, I'm just there to catch her when the fall is dangerous enough to destroy her. Now that she's finally done with her father and she's with you, I think she'll finally be happy. Truly happy and I think that's all she's ever wanted. So don't go breaking her heart." "Or you'll break my fingers?" Junmyeon smiled. Minseok laughed but Junmyeon partly wondered if that was his way of affirming what he said. Minseok was definitely scarier now that Junmyeon knew he had influence as well. Money gave anyone power, as long as they had enough of it and they were smart with it. Minseok was no moron. Junmyeon and Minseok walked into their flat together while Junmyeon went to text Y/N. That was stopped when he heard Minseok say, "Hey Y/N. What's going on?" "Nothing much. Jongin stop cheating you bastard!" She yelled. Junmyeon walked in to see her playing jump force with Jongin. She was laughing and having fun. He could only smile, he was thrilled to see her enjoying herself. After everything that had gone on recently, she deserved to be happy. He took a seat next to her and kissed her cheek. Minseok sat in the chair closest to the TV. Everyone screamed and roared as the fights when on. Y/N won the last round but in the end Jongin had bested her. She stuck her tongue out at him and Jongin laughed. Minseok asked for the controller and Y/N passed it on giving Junmyeon and Y/N a moment to enjoy each other's presence. She looked up at him, her eyes wide like she was trying to hypnotize him. He touched his nose to hers making her laugh. "How was you day today?" He asked. "A trial- but I'll live. After all I have you," she pecked his lips and looked to the guys, "and them." "Dare I say it? We're almost- family?" He joked. "Exactly. My Oppas. Minseok, Wookie, Siwon and Jongin and you... my boyfriend." He raised an eyebrow at her and grinned, "Oh I get a title too." Her smile went softer as if to say she was more serious. She gazed into his eyes softly though and said, "If you want it." Junmyeon smiled, "It would be an honor." He kissed her forehead. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest. Although they were both happy, he sensed something in the air around her. Like she was hurting, he wondered what she did today or who she spoke to and more importantly he hoped that their happiness would last..... Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw KISS Squad @BabydollBre, @QueenyCrossGene, and @BTSMicDrop Lip glosses @EXOahjummafan @Starbell808 @QueenPandaBunny @divanicola05 @MelindaL @MelissaGarza
Trauma Ch.11
Who: Reader x Kim Junmyeon What: Angst, Romance, Smut Story: You're just two trauma filled people trying to live normal lives... but trauma is a bitch Y/N's POV "Wait a minute, I'm a little confused. Start from the beginning." You said. Your mother looked at Junmyeon than you again. She sighed and her thumbs toyed with each other as she started to explain her story. "Haejin and I were very close in high school. We had a brief moment where we kissed and that's what started it all. Our generation wasn't very accepting of those kinds of relationships so, when we graduated we decided to end our secret affair. We went to different colleges and started our own lives-" "So when did you two decide to hook back up? Before or after you got pregnant with us?" You asked. There was spite in your voice, you were angry and annoyed with her. Being able to face her was both therapeutic and upsetting. You always envisioned her living a grander life, having a new husband and a new family. You always wondered if you had disappointed her, if you weren't enough for her but here she was in front of you looking the opposite of what you imagined or even remembered. Your mother had class, and smarts, she had an alluring smile that was magnifying. When everyone said you looked like your mother, you felt it was the biggest compliment to you because she was the most beautiful woman you knew. Now, as you looked at her face: old, worn, tired with half life and watching her sit slightly hunched over you felt disgrace and pity. You didn't want to be compared to her and as you listened to her story you wanted even less to be known as her daughter. "When you were four, Haejin spotted me in Itaewon. We rekindled our friendship. We caught up and talked about our families and as time went by, those feelings showed themselves again. I don't think they ever went away. We just knew it wasn't possible. We knew it was wrong but- we loved each other." She said. "I remember her coming over and you two talking alot. It seemed like a normal friendship even when Papa wasn't around." "If you had seen us, even by accident, I wouldn't have been able to explain it to you. I knew your father would be hurt if he found out and children are prone to slipping up. You once told your father she was over the house could you imagine how he would've reacted if he knew about the affair?" "Gee, I don't know. Perhaps he would've tried to kill you kinda like he tried to kill me two weeks ago." She looked at you wide eyed. Her hand went to her heart and you felt yourself cringe from her reaction. Despite it being genuine, you felt like her concerns for you weren't real enough. "Inho tried to kill you? How is that possible he adored you?" "But he hates you!" You snapped. "You left him, us , without a trace, without a fucking reason Seol; what did you expect? He's bipolar and he was hurt and everytime he looked at me he saw you. He saw the woman that broke his heart, that abandoned him. The woman who took vows to stand beside him for life and just threw it to the fucking wind. He hated me for looking like you so for fifteen years I was caught in between my father's war of loving me as his daughter and hating me as yours. He went off his meds, back and forth from dotting father to raging asshole. All so I didn't repeat the cycle. I couldn't turn out like you. I couldn't leave him because he wouldn't survive, because of the selfish decisions you made, my childhood was a living hell." "Y/N I'm sorry." She said. Her voice scratched like she was trying to hold back tears. She almost sounded pathetic but you were too upset to even care how she felt. You didn't think she had the right. You stood up ready to leave but she cried out for you. "Y/N let me explain please." You whipped around stalking up towards her, your eyes burned with tears threatening to spill over but even more anger and hatred towards her spilled out. "Explain what? Explain how all this time you were a twenty five minute train ride away? Explain why you didn't call or visit? Explain why you never said a fucking word and just walked out on me! I was your own flesh and blood and you abandoned me to a wolf!" Junmyeon stood up and grabbed you; he held you tightly to him. Your chest heaved up and down and you willed all your emotion to stay down, to just wait until she couldn't see how much your heart was breaking. As angry as you were with your mother, deep down you wanted to forgive her. You wanted her to have a good reason why she disappeared, one worth accepting so that as you lost your father you gained your mother. When the trees bloomed in spring, she would take you to the park, you two would walk around and she'd ask you what you saw in the park. You watched clouds together and visited the Han river at night. When it snowed, she would have a snowball fight with you and drink hot chocolate with you under blankets while you all watched movies. Your early life was filled with childhood memories you clung to because they were beautiful and distant. They seemed untouchable but it was all you ever desired. You lived with hope you'd have your family back one day and when that hope died you just wanted your father to love you. All you ever wanted was someone to love you and it felt like your cat might've been the only one truly did. You calmed down and pulled away from Junmyeon but when you looked up at him you realized something...he cared about you. You two slept together but it wasn't just sex, if it was, why would he do all of this: comfort you and go with you to visit your estranged mother. Someone that wasn't invested wouldn't do this. Yet, you were afraid that you weren't capable of a healthy love; you didn't really know what that was. You were subservient to Heechul, was that why he cheated? You held your own secrets from him, you kept him locked out but you were at his beck and call. Minseok was always your friend, staying close to you, making sure you were alright but there was never anything romantic between you two. You didn't really understand what it meant to be in love. You looked back at your mother, calm now and Junmyeon had you sit back down. "I left because I felt guilty for Haejin's death. In the midst of our affair, her husband started to suspect that she was cheating with another man. She was afraid of his temper but she also loved you," she looked to Junmyeon. He didn't look like he wanted to hear much about his mother. Perhaps she read that on his face because she looked back to you. "Haejin thought it was best if we just went back to our normal lives. We had families we had to end it. Haejin wanted to get back home early that night but I begged her to stay a little longer. We slept together and then she left. That was the last time I saw her." She said. "They had a fight the night before she died." Junmyeon said putting pieces together. "I think he became so convinced about her affair that he tried to drag the truth out of her. It's possible she confessed to the affair or even confessed she was sleeping with a woman but if I didn't ask her to stay- if I hadn't coaxed her into staying later she might still be alive. The guilt ate away at me for three years, I was living with my own family and hers had fallen apart. I couldn't live with myself, I needed a new start so I decided to leave, I didn't tell your father because he would've chased me. I knew how much he loved me he would've fought for me but that only meant I would break his heart more in the process because I didn't love him." "So why didn't you take me?" "Because you were a reminder of the life I was trying to leave behind. You tied me to your father and I had to cut the tether to escape. But, the pain of my sins are like heavy weights forcing me to the ground." "You can't take the blame for other people's actions." you said annoyed. "Isn't that what you're doing to me? Blaming me for what your father has done." "No I'm blaming you for the choices you made. You knew dad was bipolar so you knew the risks of leaving him abruptly. You didn't love him yet everyday you pretended you did, you broke his heart. As my mother, you were responsible for protecting me and you didn't. I don't blame you for the abuse, he's the one that hit me but I do blame you for starting the chain of events that led to it. Your actions were reckless and you never once stopped to consider who you were affecting in the process you didn't care. Out of all the decisions you made, I blame you the most for not choosing me." You said. "I did choose you. I thought you were safe with your father." "You thought I was safe with the mentally ill man that you knew wasn't even responsible enough for taking his own medication. I remember that mom, you counting his pills and crushing them in his drinks. You assumed everything would be fine, you hoped it would be fine so he could assume the role that you no longer wanted. If that was the case you should've never had me in the first place.... You chose your grief over your own daughter. For ten years, I adored you as much as I adored papa, I moved in you. For nine months, your womb was my home and even that connection wasn't enough for you to pick me. What your responsible for is robbing me of a decent childhood by leaving me with a man with a mental illness. That's what I blame you for and your refusal to recognize that what you did was more destructive than how you could've handled it is what's going to keep us from ever being together. I thought papa was the only family I had left... Now it's clear to me I really have no one." You and Junmyeon stood up and you headed for the door. You reached the front only to look back and see Junmyeon handing Seol the picture of his mother. He found out a lot too which meant you both needed time to process. You and Junmyeon went back to Seoul in silence; you both held hands and leaned on each other for comfort on the train. Junmyeon saw you home even though his place was closer to the train station. You both stood at your front door in silence for a moment. Junmyeon couldn't bring himself to look at you. You gave a bitter laugh and said, "Don't tell me you're blaming me too." He looked up at you like he had come out of a daze. "What? What would I blame you for?" He asked. "For being that women's daughter. She had just as much of a hand in destroying your family as she did mine and I look like her-" He kissed you, his movement to your lips was swift, he cupped your face between his thumb and forefinger and his lips were soft against yours. When he pulled away you looked at him almost like a puppy. "I'm not your father Y/N. I'm not like him at all. There's just a lot we found out today. I need- we both need to sort through what we learned." You agreed but you partly wondered if he was already pulling away from you. You walked into the house but you noticed as soon as you unlocked the door he was already walking away. A part of you regretted asking him to come along. You thought about everything that happened though, you were just as guilty of pulling away from him as well. You two were doing this dance of getting close and pulling away. So many things from your past made it complicated to keep a proper relationship. When you were with Heechul, hiding your past and your father's abuse was easy. It was something that you had done all your life. Junmyeon was aware of everything, being this open with someone that wasn't Minseok was new. Your fear that he was with you because he knew your trauma had subsided and was replaced with the fear that he didn't want to be with you because you were your mother's daughter. He said that he wasn't anything like your father but you felt him moving space between you two. .... You were at Cheong Jin Ok, despite not having a hangover you ordered the hangover cure anyway. You spun a coin on the table while you waited. Only three days had passed since you and Junmyeon discovered so much about your mothers and it was still hard to process everything. You weren't bothered by the fact that she was in love with Haejin; what bothered you was that they had an affair. They could've just left their husbands. Though, you started to wonder how well that would've gone for Haejin. It sounded as though Junmyeon's father had exhibited abusive behavior long before he killed his mother. It made some sense, he didn't just go mad and kill her because she had an affair unless he was already the type to get dangerously aggressive. He did this when Junmyeon was seven, you wondered just how much of his father's abuse he remembered. You wondered if he ever even saw it. You were lost in your own thoughts when someone sat down in front of you. It took you a moment to realize it but you looked up to see Heechul smiling at you. For a moment, it reminded you of when you two first met. He had that glow about him, all kinds of charisma but there was a slight reminder of your father in him. The way you felt like you could never make him happy. That you were never really enough to begin with. You wondered if he ever loved you, you were...infatuated with him. Maybe it was the same for him, but what made him captivated with you? "Boo." He said with a soft smile. "Boo." "What are you doing here alone? Couldn't find a date?" Heechul was always a little too harsh. He may have meant it as a joke but it pierced through you a little. "Didn't really want one." you answered. The waiter stopped by and placed your hangover cure in front of you. The waiter asked Heechul if he was ready to order and he informed him he wasn't getting anything, much to your relief. You half expected him to try and turn this into an awkward kind of date. "You don't look like you need a hangover cure." he said. "I don't but at the same time I do." "Where's that guy that's always attached to you. Junmyeon, right?" "I don't know probably at home or hanging out with the guys.... He's not always attached to m-you think he's always attached to me?" Heechul chuckled, he rested his chin in his hand as he looked at you. "He was there everyday while you were in the hospital. Right by your bed side; he was pissed off I even showed up to see you." "You came to see me?" Your voice projected more hope and happiness than you meant it to. It was a given the Junmyeon by your side at the hospital; you figured he wanted to make sure you were safe because of everything that happened. He was the first one you saw when you woke up, he even kissed you. Heechul coming to see you in the hospital meant something to you, the feeling of not being wanted felt a little less heavier than before. That rose a question in you that you never thought to ask before, "Why did you even go out with me?" You asked. His eyebrows rose like he wanted to know where that question came from but then he sank his chin down in his hand and puffed up his cheek. You could tell he was thinking but for a moment his eyes wandered off and you wondered if he was ever going to answer your question. Normally, you wouldn't even talk to him, any one that hurt you, you kicked them out of your life. Although, your most recent revelation that you did the same thing your father did when your mother left made you realize you were following the same path. You still had your reservations when it came to Heechul but you were trying to resolve your problems not create more. Part of that resolution was facing them. "You're really cute." Heechul said. He wasn't even looking at you when he said it. He finally turned to look at you though and you just blinked at him. You could feel a blush rising up once again reminding you of when you two first met. He smiled at your look and said, "You've got big eyes and a really pretty smile. You've got this gravitational pull about you that makes it hard to not want to get close." "But you never got close." "I tried- you wouldn't let me. Minseok was your go to person and that was annoying to me because you were a different person with him, he knew secrets that as your boyfriend I think I should've known. Or at least you could've trusted me with. The more you kept me out the more frustrating it was." "Is that why you cheated?" He got quiet for a moment. Neither one of you talked about it. You never talked about your relationship the way you should've. No wonder it never worked out between you. If he hadn't hit you back, you might've forgave him, you might've gone back to him if he said he wanted you. Instead, you tried pushing everyone out. Siwon and Ryeowook were hard to push out though, when you saw Siwon again you couldn't push him away. It felt too good to know that he was really your friend. You never really seemed to lack friends in your life, you were lucky enough for that. So was it completely impossible for you to "fall in love?" "I cheated because I wasn't satisfied by you." You felt like he just threw a rock at your head. Even though you were offended by that, you did consider that the only reason you ever slept with him most times was because he wanted to have sex. "Next time just take a knife and stab me in the chest, it would hurt a lot less." You said sarcastically. He laughed, "Look, I didn't mean it to hurt your feelings but the truth is that you weren't connected with me. You were always somewhere else. It didn't even seem like you enjoyed it so I felt like I was just screwing a doll." "Geeze do you have to describe it like that?" You both laughed together and it seemed to be a good genuine moment that would lead to some healing. You still needed time but Heechul might not be so bad to hang around again. You enjoyed your time with him at the bar. As you two talked, he made some comments that annoyed you and ones that made you laugh but it reminded you a lot of the initial bliss when you two first hooked up. "Why did you come here alone anyway?" He asked suddenly. "Umm. I just kinda wandered in." You said. Heechul had followed you out of the restaurant and was walking with you down the street. "More secrets huh?" He teased. "It's the truth. I was just walking around lost in thought and my stomach started grumbling so I walked in to eat. What were you doing in there alone?" "I wasn't in there to begin with, I just saw you in there and decided to annoy you." "What's up with you guys always wanting to annoy me?" You smiled. Heechul pushed his finger into your cheek making you laugh. He claimed it was fun seeing your different expressions. He liked your eyes, your father liked them too. That's why he loved your mother, her eyes were expressive and large. He used to describe them like large black holes pulling you in against your will. It was the one advantage you had to never being alone. It didn't seem like either of you had a destination but you stayed together for the majority of the day, even as the clouds began to roll in. You forgot about what it was like dating him, this seemed like a newer experience to you, although, deep down you missed Junmyeon. His radio silence was disturbing and your trial with your father was coming up soon. "So what's up with you and that guy anyway? He ask you out yet?" Heechul asked. "Why do you want to know?" "Just wondering is all. It's obvious he's in love with you." You chuckled, "What?" "Oh I forgot it's obvious to everyone but you." You stopped in your tracks. You grabbed his hand to stop him and looked at him curiously. "Did he tell you that?" You asked. Heechul laughed, "He didn't have to it's obvious. Not to mention he hates when I come around. I have a sneaking suspicion it has more to do with the fact that I'm your ex rather than that I hit you. Which, I suppose I never apologized for." He took your hand in his and kissed the back of it before he cupped your cheek with the other hand. "I'm truly sorry for hurting you, not just physically but emotionally as well. I'm an asshole but you know this by now." He said. You burst out laughing and swatted his hand away from your cheek. "You really are an ass, but I suppose I can forgive you just this once. Just don't go taking advantage of my kindness." "As an asshole I can't promise that." You rolled your eyes but he laughed at you. You two started walking again but you brought up what he said before. "So you really believe he's in love with me?" You said. "You know if you were an anime character you'd have little sparkles in your eyes right now." "Heechul." "Yes, he likes you. He's in love with you, in an annoying capacity actually. From what I've heard you two already slept together, if that was all he wanted from you then he wouldn't have gone through all the trouble he went through " That may have been true but you wondered if he still felt the same after everything he had learned. You hadn't attempted to call him because you wanted to give him time. You thanked Heechul and gave him a hug before running off but you heard him asking you what he did to be thanked for. You headed to Minseok's place hoping to find Junmyeon there. You knocked on the door and Jongin answered. He welcomed you in. "Is Junmyeon here?" You asked. He shrugged, "I don't know I just woke up. Let's see." Jongin knocked on the Junmyeon's door with you standing behind him. Junmyeon opened the door just enough to poke his head out. He was shirtless which seemed like the norm for him when he was home and in his room. When he saw you, his eyes got wide though, "Y/N what are you doing here?" He asked. "I wanted to talk to you. Can I come in?" Junmyeon looked back in his room and then back at you making you feel like he was hiding something. You stepped up to the door, "Junmyeon is someone in the room with you," "Uh-" You put your hand on the door and looked at him. You heard a snicker from behind the door and adrenaline rushed through you. You looked at Junmyeon hoping he'd tell you the truth but you doubted it. "Listen, it's really not what you think." "Then open the door. Show me it's not what I think." He looked almost hopeless and he sighed defeated. He let his hand down so he could stop guarding the door. He opened it more for you to see Seohyun sitting on his bed. You stepped in looking at her disappointed. Was heartbreak all you'd ever know in this world? Was nothing kind to you? You looked to Junmyeon with tears brimming, "Then what is this, Junmyeon?" "We were just talking." He said "In your room, with the door shut and no shirt on? She's your ex isn't she?" "Calm down Y/N-" You raised your hand to stop Seohyun from talking. You were locking eyes with Junmyeon even as you said to her, "I wasn't talking to you." Junmyeon looked down at his feet. Was he playing you all this time? A thousand different things ran in your head but the first thing that came out of your mouth was, "Did you sleep with her?" He looked guilty which made you feel like throwing up. You hurried out of the house, Junmyeon called after you. You felt the first soft drops of rain coming down, rain you weren't expecting even though the soft gray clouds had taken over the sun. You heard Junmyeon calling after you and you hurried, running down the street but he was faster. He caught onto your arm and turned you around so you could look at him. The rain was pouring now, it picked up so quickly, you both were drenched, hair sticking to your faces. "Let me go!" you yelled. "Y/N listen to me." "No!" You cried. You banged your fist on his chest crying, "I hate you. Why did you make me believe you cared about me? Why did you do this?" "I do care about you. Y/n I got drunk last night. I don't even remember how I got home let alone if me and Segun slept together." "Why did you get drunk? Why did you look so guilty?" "Because I knew how it looked. I don't know if me and Seohyun did anything and to be honest I highly doubt we did. I got drunk because I couldn't process all of this information about my mother-" "You do hate me for looking like that woman don't you?" You tried to pull away from him but his grip was firm on your shoulders. He cupped your face, "Y/N I don't hate you. None of what happened was your fault. You're not your mother I know that." "But I look like her, that's all you'll ever see. The woman that destroyed your family." You looked him in the eyes. Your vision blurred a little and you tried to wipe your eyes clear. You felt like someone was ripping your heart out. "Y/N, I'm in love with you." Junmyeon confessed. "How can you mean that? How am I supposed to believe you, when ever I get vulnerable around you, anytime I'm ready to take a risk she shows up. " "You're the only one I want." "How do you know?" He crashed his lips onto yours kissing you hard and feverishly. Your lips molded with his as he deepened the kiss so much it was like he was trying to become one with you. His hands came to your neck then your waist pulling you into his body so that the idea of space didn't even exist. The taste of his lips, the fever of his kiss, he burned himself into your flesh and awakened a Phoenix fire like never before. Your heart jumped, skipped and leapt. It fluttered and wailed and every tear you cried out of sadness became happier. Happier than you had ever been before. "I don't want to live without you." He said against your lips. You looked him in the eyes. His thumbs wiped away tears. His white shirt was soaking and sticking to him showing the lines of his chest and abs. Your hands touched his chest, they memorized the muscles as if it would be the last time you'd ever touch them. "Then stay with me. Don't see her, don't let her near you." You begged. He kissed you once more, softly, letting his lips linger on yours. His tongue slow waltzing in your mouth. He breathed you in, and despite how cold the rain was making you, the heat of his kiss kept you warm on the inside. "Do you love me?" He asked. His eyes were half closed, he kept your face close to his, his hands still cradling your face. You looked at him with dewy eyes, and smiled. "I do... I'm in love with you, I always have been." He was overcome with happiness and scooped you up in one more deep kiss. You broke it to pull away and took his hand. You ran with him to your apartment, pouring rain and all.... Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw
BTS MAP OF THE SOUL TOUR DATES!!!!!🙌🏻🙌🏻🔥
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