SNBlackRose
a year ago500+ Views
Here's a light-hearted chapter for you guys! Hopefully it makes up for the depressing previous chapter.
Disclaimer: Many of the characters aside from BTS are made up. And, of course, I don't know BTS personally so their personalities are probably mostly fictional. Also, for this chapter, I will say that I don't really know anything about composing music, so forgive me for mistakes.
Character thoughts are in { } and words in English are bolded. Let me know if you would like to be tagged in future chapters. Please forgive me for any mistakes I make and I hope you enjoy!
Beginning: Chapter 1
Previous: Chapter 24
Word Count: 3834
Warning: May contain mild language.
Rose POV
For the next two weeks, the boys continued to be busy. Yoongi was only able to come over the second Saturday. And was acting a little weird. He had woken up at lunch again, but instead of working on his music alone, he asked me to join him. I’d heard that he never shared his unfinished work with anyone, so I was surprised at his request. But there was no way I’d turn down a chance like that. It was amazing: from his unfinished raps to just random songs stuck in his head. At one point, we were looking over a song and he started to try to explain what was in his head.
“It’s, uh, how can I explain it? Like soft, but powerful. I can’t even think of the melody completely, but it starts like this.” He pressed play and played about a minute of a song. It was melodic, but when it ended abruptly, I looked at him. “And that’s where I keep getting stuck.” I thought about it and hummed out a few more notes that felt like they fit the melody. “Something like that! Hold on, let me—stupid computer. It’s hard to play music off of here. Sorry. I wish we were at my studio.”
“If you’re wanting to work out a melody, we can go downstairs.” Yoongi gave me a questioning look. “I have some instruments downstairs.” His eyes widened.
“Really?”
“Mm. Even though I can’t play at all like I used to, I like to play when I’m feeling particularly nostalgic. Plus, the doctor’s had recommended that I keep at it to keep the joints from getting too stiff.”
Yoongi smiled at me. “Does that mean I’ll get to hear you play?” he teased.
“Maybe, but you first. I want to see you in action.” {Okay, that came out a little creepy}.
“Okay, deal,” he laughed. He gathered his papers and laptop and I led him to the music room. I watched as he looked over everything in awe. “Wow, this is awesome. I wish I had a room like this at the dorm.”
“Then you’d have to have bunk beds for all of you guys.” I laughed at the image.
“Ugh! I don’t think I could handle that.”
“I can only imagine.”
“Do you play the guitar and violin too?”
“Oh, uh, guitar, a little. Another recommendation for my rehabilitation. The violin is Nina.”
“She plays the violin?” Yoongi looked at my in complete surprise.
“Yeah, I know, right? Looking at her, you wouldn’t think she was capable of being delicate, huh?”
“I didn’t say that!” he threw his hands up defensively.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell.” We both laughed. “Yeah, she can be delicate. Some of the songs she plays are so beautiful. Other times, though, you should hear her. She can play a rock song like it’s no one’s business.”
“That part doesn’t surprise me.” We laughed again. He walked over to the keyboard before moving past it and letting his fingers slide along the surface of the Baby Grand. {Oh my God, those fingers}. Then I mentally slapped myself for letting my thoughts wander off on such a dangerous path. And yet there I was practically drooling as he sat down and let his fingers rest on the piano keys. He had beautiful piano fingers. He started to play the song he had just had me listen to. I closed my eyes as I let the music wash over me. Then I looked down at my ruined fingers. Sure, they looked normal, but it took a long time for that. And they’re not functional like they used to be. I looked up when Yoongi stopped playing and saw him looking at me with a smile on his face. I got embarrassed and hoped my cheeks weren’t showing it.
“You have beautiful fingers.” I let out a small snort of disagreement.
“You—you have perfect fingers. And you play perfectly, too,” I told him quietly. This time, he got embarrassed. He stood up and gestured to the bench.
“Can—if it’s okay to ask...can I hear you play something? It doesn’t have be, like Beethoven or anything like that, but just...y’know. A-actually, nevermind, you don’t have to.” He started to sit back down.
I took a deep breath. {It’s now or never}. “I can—uh, I can do that.” He was silent as he looked at me with a hesitant smile. {Why would that make him happy? Ah, coming out of my shell. Trusting a friend. He must be happy that I can trust him}. I smiled nervously. He moved away so I could sit down. “I, uh, I’m going to mess up because I can’t, uh, make them move as quickly or smoothly as they should, but, uh, so—just don’t expect too much, ok?” He just smiled at me.
That smile made my heart flutter. And I knew just the song to play. It was a song I had written and obsessed over for about a month right before my—incident. I had a major crush on one of the other students that were homeschooled through the same company and that song felt so perfect for it. It wasn’t a showy or a dramatic. It was simple...simple and beautifully romantic. If songs could speak, which I believe they did, it felt like this song conveyed a story of sweet, innocent, and, of course, secret love. I’d only played it a handful of times since then, just when I felt nostalgic. But now, that song felt so perfect for my feelings. Okay, maybe not so much the innocent part, but still.
I let my fingers barely skim the keys as they I set them in their starting positions. I closed my eyes and let the nervousness fade away. I let everything fade away except the feeling of the smooth keys and the fluttering feeling Yoongi gave me. I started to play. I let the music pour out. I had trouble making my fingers move properly a couple of times, but I just continued. For those few minutes, I forgot where I was or that Yoongi was there. As my fingers lightly pressed the last key, I let the decrescendo fade into silence.
I finally opened my eyes and snapped back to reality. I was back in the music room with Yoongi standing next to me. My cheeks flushed and I shyly turned to look at Yoongi. He just stood there, staring at me. I couldn’t read his expression. {Did he think it was good? Was it bad? Did he notice my missed notes or the times when my fingers got caught and I went off beat for a second? Why wasn’t he saying anything?} He was statue-still; it didn’t even look like he was breathing.
“Sorry. Like I said, I can’t really play properly. I know I messed up a—“
Yoongi muttered something that sounded like, “It was beautiful.” The breathy way he said that...it made heart skip a beat.
“Oh, uh, thanks,” I replied as I dropped my gaze. I could feel my cheeks were flushed. When I looked back at him, he was still looking at me, but his eyes still didn’t meet mine. He was looking somewhere at my face. {Agh! Do I have something on my face? That’s so embarrassing!} I quickly wiped my face with my arm. When I finished, Yoongi eyes met mine, he looked...embarrassed? {Probably because I saw him staring. But I should be the one embarrassed}.
“That song was very nice, but I’ve never heard it before. Is it an American song?”
“Um, yeah, you could say that.” He gave me a puzzled look. Then his expression changed as he came to a realization.
“Did you write it?!” My face flushed again. I nodded my head.
I was surprised when Yoongi grabbed my hands. “You write music? That’s amazing! And you wrote that song. I can’t believe—I mean a song like that should’ve been everywhere. You said you were a pianist, so how could that not take off? I mean, I can only imagine how wonderful your playing must’ve been if you say that your current level is so off. How could—“ He stopped for a moment when he realized I still looked surprised. “I’m sorry. I’m bombarding you. I didn’t mean to do that. It’s just that...your playing, that song...it’s really amazing.”
“No, it’s not that. Umm...just...” I looked down at our hands that were still grasped tightly together. He immediately let go of mine like they burned him. His face turned bright red. The look on his face...I couldn’t help but think how cute it was.
“I’m sorry! I didn’t realize—I didn’t mean to—I’m sorry.” Yoongi violently mussed his hair. I stood up from the bench.
I put a hand on his shoulder, reassuringly. I knew it was an accident and I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable around me. “It’s ok, Yoongi, you just caught me off-guard is all. I know you didn’t mean it in a weird way. I’m just glad that me playing was exciting for you.” I gave him the sweetest smile I could. “But to answer some of your questions...I used to write. I don’t really anymore. And that song...it was the last song I wrote before... I couldn’t play anymore. I actually only got to play it once before...everything...”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring that back up.” Yoongi looked at me, concerned.
“It’s fine. I...It’s part of my life. I accepted it a long time ago. I know that I—I still am... hesitant and awkward, but I’m trying to, I guess, get used to talking about it. To other people. And I know you guys care, and I trust you guys,” {Devil-on-my-shoulder be damned}, “it’s just that it’s a lot to rehash at once. Both for me to talk about it and for anyone else to take it in. It’s...” Yoongi touched my arm as if to say ‘It’s alright’. I smiled sadly and he smiled back. I didn’t care what I kept telling myself, I now knew for sure that I’d been in love with him...for a long time...
Yoongi POV
I was surprised when she said she had a music room. I think for me, if I had lost something that meant so much, it would be hard for me to live with a constant reminder of the loss. But I was glad that she was sharing. I’m glad that I decided to share my music with her. Normally, I didn’t like to let anyone else hear what I was working on. My raw music was never good enough. I worked it and reworked it a hundred times before I could even consider letting Namjoon hear it for his input. But something about Rose, not just the fact that I was crazy about her, made me want to share. I wanted to hear what she had to say, what she could contribute. I mean, I was, of course, hoping that it could bring us closer, maybe put me a little more on her radar, but that wasn’t the only reason.
We were talking while we walked to her music room. When Rose opened the door, I couldn’t help showing the astonishment that I felt. It was awesome. I told how I wished I had access to something like this at the dorms. She had a Baby Grand, a keyboard, a synthesizer, a couple different guitars, and...violins?
I walked to the stringed instruments. “You play the guitar and violin too?”
“Oh, uh, guitar, a little. Another recommendation for my rehabilitation. The violin is Nina.” {Nina? Nina plays the violin? I wouldn’t imagine that in a million years}.
“She plays the violin?” I turned to Rose.
“Yeah, I know, right? Looking at her, you wouldn’t think she was capable of being delicate, huh?”
“I didn’t say that!” I threw his hands up. No way would I ever say that to her face. Nina was nice, but she was definitely tough. If any guy tried something with her that she didn’t like, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him end up with broken bones. And I definitely did not want to be on the receiving end.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell.” We both laughed. “Yeah, she can be delicate. Some of the songs she plays are so beautiful. Other times, though, you should hear her. She can play a rock song like it’s no one’s business.”
“That part doesn’t surprise me.” {At all}. I walked to the end of the room, looking at the keyboard before walking past it. I let my hands brush along the piano. It was a beautiful and well-cared for instrument. I sat down in front of it. I played the keyboard often for the purpose of writing my music and I even played an actual piano sometimes. But this was different. A Baby Grand. It was elegant. I set my fingers on the keys and started to play the song that had been stuck in my head for a while. The song that I had shared with Rose, the one who had been my inspiration for it. The song was like a dream. When you first wake up, the fragments are still there. But the more you try to grasp them, the more they slip through. The notes I wanted to play were at the tip of my fingers, but every time I tried to play it, it disappeared on me. It was frustrating. I played until I got to the part I kept getting stuck on.
I looked up at Rose just before the last few notes and saw her looking down at her fingers. Her face showed her displeasure and sadness. I couldn’t let her continue to feel sad. I smiled as I hit the last note. Rose looked up at me and then looked away, her cheeks tinged with a light, rosy pink. I figured she must’ve be embarrassed.
“You have beautiful fingers.” {You really do}. Rose let out this adorable little snort, apparently her way of disagreeing with me.
“You—you have perfect fingers. And you play perfectly, too.” Then my face flushed. It made me happy to know that she enjoyed my playing, but it was still... I stood up and gestured to the bench. I knew that she said she couldn’t play like she used to, but if she was a pianist, then even not fully-functional, she should still be able to play. I knew I was being selfish, but I really wanted to hear her play. Just once.
“Can—if it’s okay to ask...can I hear you play something? It doesn’t have be, like Beethoven or anything like that, but just...y’know.” {That was stupid, I shouldn’t’ve asked. She’s going to hate me now}. “A-actually, nevermind, you don’t have to.” I started to sit back down. Maybe if we went back to working on the song, she’d forget to be mad at me.
“I can—uh, I can do that.” I got excited. I couldn’t keep my smile contained, though I did have the foresight to tone it down. I didn’t want her to misunderstand and think that I was manipulating her or anything like that. I looked at her, still stuck half-way between standing and sitting. She gave me a nervous smile and I moved away. My heart was pounding at the thought of listening to her play, her beautiful fingers gliding along the keys.
“I, uh, I’m going to mess up because I can’t, uh, make them move as quickly or smoothly as they should be, but, uh, so—just don’t expect too much, ok?” {Anything, even a single note would be perfect}. I smiled at her encouragingly. She sat down and rested her hands on the keys like she already had a song in mind. And then she played.
I’d heard many people play the piano in my life. Some were good, some were not so good. Some were amazing, their fingers flying over keys at a speed I could never replicate. Rose’s playing wasn’t flashy or showy. It didn’t demand attention or scream ‘look what I can do’...It was mesmerizing. It enveloped me. As she played, I could feel the notes resonating in my heart. It made me think of young love, sweet, innocent, and playful, with a hint of...perhaps sadness? A lost love? A secret love? A one-sided love? I watched as she played into the music, with the music. I had never heard the song before, but I was completely enraptured by it. I closed my eyes as the music continued to flow.
Every small mistake she made only added texture to the song. Love is imperfect, life is imperfect...If I wasn’t in love with her before, and that was very much in doubt, then I knew I was in love with her now. I could feel her pour her soul into the music. And it made me feel a little sad. {If...if this was the song she chose...is this how she felt? Was she that much in love with Namjoon? She thought he didn’t feel the same?}
As the song wound down, I cleared those thoughts from my head. Rose was playing for me, not for anyone else. None of the other guys had heard her play before. That had to mean something. She lightly pressed the last note, letting it linger in the air. I watched her eyes stay closed, she was lost in the song. Suddenly, her eyes jolted open. {Guess she came back to reality?} I couldn’t help but stare at her. At her lips. I wanted to kiss them so badly. I wanted to kiss her and show her how much I loved her, how much her song affected me, how much I wanted her to be mine. She had completely taken my breath away.
“Sorry. Like I said, I can’t really play properly. I know I messed up a—“
“You’re beautiful,” I said under my breath. I didn’t even realize I had said it out loud until she responded.
“Oh, uh, thanks,” she said. I don’t think she heard me properly, which was just as well. I couldn’t stop staring at her lips. It was taking all of my self-control to not grab her face and ravage her lips. She wiped her face with her arm causing me to break from my reverie. I looked up to see her looking back at me. My face flushed. {She must’ve seen me staring at her. I wanna crawl into a hole and just die}.
I needed to change her attention. “That song was very nice, but I’ve never heard it before. Is it an American song?”
“Um, yeah, you could say that.” {What does that mean? Is it or not?} Then I realized what she could’ve meant.
“Did you write it?!” Her face flushed and she nodded her head shyly.
I started rambling. “You write music? That’s amazing! And you wrote that song. I can’t believe—I mean a song like that should’ve been everywhere. You said you were a pianist, so how could that not take off? I mean, I can only imagine how wonderful your playing must’ve been if you say that your current level is so off. How could—“ {What does that look mean? Am I asking too many questions? Of course, you idiot. It’s a sensitive topic for her and you just rattle off like a machine gun}. “I’m sorry. I’m bombarding you. I didn’t mean to do that. It’s just that...your playing, that song...it’s really amazing.” I was flustered.
“No, it’s not that. Umm...just...” I followed her gaze as she looked down. I was gripping her hands tightly. I immediately let go of them. {I can’t believe I did that! What’s wrong with me? I can’t even control my actions anymore!}
“I’m sorry! I didn’t realize—I didn’t mean to—I’m sorry.” My face turned bright red. I was even more embarrassed than when she caught me looking at her. Today is just one gigantic day of embarrassment. I dragged my fingers through my hair. I didn’t realize Rose had moved until she put a hand on my shoulder.
“It’s ok, Yoongi, you just caught me off-guard is all. I know you didn’t mean it in a weird way. I’m just glad that me playing was exciting for you.” She gave me a beautiful smile. {She wouldn’t be smiling like that if she knew how I felt about her}. “But to answer some of your questions...I used to write. I don’t really anymore. And that song...it was the last song I wrote before...I couldn’t play anymore. I actually only got to play it once before... everything...”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring that back up.” I looked at her. {It’s official, I’m the world’s biggest idiot}.
“It’s fine. I...It’s part of my life. I accepted it a long time ago. I know that I—I still am... hesitant and awkward, but I’m trying to, I guess, get used to talking about it. To other people. And I know you guys care, and I trust you guys, it’s just that it’s a lot to rehash at once. Both for me to talk about it and for anyone else to take it in. It’s...” I touched her arm, comfortingly. She smiled sadly at me and I smiled back.
We stayed that way for a few seconds before she cleared her throat and said, “So about that song.” I laughed. We walked back to the piano.
Somehow, being around her helped to keep the song from disappearing. I was able to jot down a rough draft of the song. Time flew too quickly and it was time for me to leave for my schedule. I was cleaning up my papers when I remembered something I was supposed to ask her.
“Oh, noona. We all were wondering if you and Nina would like to come to a picnic next Saturday. We’re all off and we wanted to make up for being so busy lately. The young ones really miss you.” Her laugh was musical.
“I would love to go,” she replied. “Unfortunately, Nina can’t come. She’s going out of town again. But I know you guys are busy, so rescheduling would probably be a problem. We can just make it up to her another time, if that’s ok?”
“Uh, yeah, that sounds good. We’ll decide on the exact time and let you know okay?” I finished putting my shoes on.
“Alright then. Sounds like fun. And let me know what I can bring, ok?”
“Ok. I’ll leave that part to Jin.” We both laughed. I opened the door and she waved as I walked away still facing her. I had my mask on so I tried to show my smile with my eyes. I got into the waiting van and she closed her door.
There's the chapter. Hope it made you feel a little better after the last chapter :)
Thank you all for reading my story and this chapter. I hope is was enjoyable. Thank you to everyone reading, liking, commenting, clipping, and following. Please don't hesitate to ask questions or comment. Constructive criticism is always welcome. Let me know if you would like to be tagged in future chapters. I hope you will continue to enjoy my story and I hope to see you next chapter!!!
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3 comments
it's finally here! can't wait to read it😉
a year ago·Reply
A special moment sharing the love of music...inwardly, secretly sharing a secret love.💖😊
a year ago·Reply
@MaritessSison Music is the perfect thing to share between people who love each other. Even if they don't know it's mutual, lol
a year ago
Come on Yoongi....man up!
a year ago·Reply
View 1 more replies
Yep....kick in the butt or a light smack in the head.
a year ago
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