So are you saying you never felt how much i really cared. You just never felt my love at all? You know what i think? i think you cant go deep enough inside your own heart to know what is there and i think it is blocked off and nothing gets in or out. Every heart has layors of depth. You live from the top layor and you never go deeper. I know there is so much there, so much that you don't want to feel and can't feel. I know it because I felt it and it made me love you and care for you so much more than anything I have ever known. That is why I stayed with you no matter what you did to me. I felt something so precious in you. If you knew what I felt, maybe things could have been different. If you could feel my feelings, you would never have doubted how much i cared, not even for a moment. I think the problem is you have trouble feeling your own deepest feelings. You are disconnected from your true self and therefore, you are disconnected from the true feelings of others as well. I love you and I'm so sorry that my pain has changed me.