Dear Significant Other,
At times i am very hard to talk to. I blame my pride, my stubborn-nature and my all-round hardheadedness. In bold because they are that serious on occasions. I am trying to let them, not trying as hard as i should be but trying nonetheless. You may or may not have experienced this by now already, i'm hoping it's the latter. However you may need to experience some of it so you can know that i don't really want to be that way, it's evident sometimes because i clench and un-clench my fist several times when i'm trying to control it. Although i also do that when i'm trying to control anger. I'll probably get angry as we grow old together for whatever there reason there is.
I believe we need to see these sides of each other every now and again so that we know how to deal with each other. "All of me loves all of you" can only be true if i see all the sides of you and if i show you all the sides of me. Even the ones i hate. Maybe i'll just tell you about them and never actually let you experience them. Or someone else will affect me in a way that brings them out and you'll be there to comfort me? Relax me? Bring me back from that dark place. JUST GOT A POEM IDEA!
THE DARK PLACE.
I'm afraid but i'm also angry, sad and lonely.
Welcome to my dark place.
A place where light is only barely visible,
like the candle that's burning out as its
flame is swallowed by its own wax.
It flickers, its tears are now bringing about
the end of its life.
A place where my only comfort is the sound of my own heart beating.
Pumping blood to parts of my body i can't see,
like the tree in the woods that apparently doesn't make a sound
do i really exist?
A place where my deepest fears are realized,
there is no joy here.
Only sorrow, never-ending mental screams that
come from every corner of the room.
How do i know there are corners?
I want out!!! I need an escape,
I need to feel something.
I vaguely remember the touch of a human.
Do the spaces in-between my fingers still exist?
Will they be filled by something that won't kill me if i explore this room?
I'm in dire need of something i'm not sure exists.
In my dark place i feel alone.
Would i see more if i closed my eyes?
I'm beginning to appreciate the presence of darkness,
for it makes the light all the more lovely.
I'm not always in my dark place...
I'm not always alone, scared or angry.
I'm learning that others exist here,
In my dark place.
I just need to explore.