2 years ago100+ Views
Who: Reader x Woo Jiho What: Semi-angst, Semi-smut. (I honestly don't know how to place this) Chapter 2 For those of you that haven't read Rappers Intent this is the second part of that story. I have decided to make a second part it may become a trilogy I don't even know. Story: At your three year mark as a group, NTERNational has come a long way since that performance after your brother's death. You and Zico have been dating almost a full year but stress has overcome you in a much different way. No one seems to know what's wrong with you not even your best friend Jihoon. With another mini album coming out and you working on your solo mixtape, the pressure becomes harder to handle and your relationship with Zico wavers...
Y/N's POV You listened to Jay explain his music video to you and nodded along to show him you were listening. He kept running his hand through his hair and the tattoos around his body had your eyes trailing him. Each one looked more beautiful than the other. His hands looked like they could firmly grasp your shoulders or thigh and you mean FIRMLY GRASP it. He licked his lips a few times and you caught how his tongue traced over his lips in a seductive manner. When Zico did that, you were falling all over the place. He did it when you were in practice too; it would distract you so much you'd stop dancing just to kiss him then kick him out of the room because he was stealing your focus away. Jay was doing the same thing and that made you feel weird. Your heart fluttered just slightly at the look in his eyes. You looked away, Jay was just like that though. He flirted. You two were on a variety show once and the host asked you if you were to go on a second date with Jay Park what would you want to do? "I wouldn't go on a first date with Jay." you said. "What's wrong with me?" Jay said laughing. You laughed too hoping you hadn't offended him. Jihoon was sitting next to you, he said, "She's into rappers." Jay feigned a shocked face and put a hand to his heart, "But I rap too, what is going on? Tiger what are you trying to say?" You were laughing embarrassed at the situation and said, "Here's the thing Jay is an amazing artist but he intimidates me. I'm a huge fan of his but if you read his lyrics it makes me wonder sometimes if I were to go out with this guy I would need some experience? And I have none." you said hinting as obviously as you could without having to say it. The host recognized immediately what you were saying and was shocked and adored your innocence. Jay laughed and said, "No worries when you grow up give me a call." He winked at you making you laugh, Jihoon partly faked his protective side and wrapped his arms round you to keep you safe. Obviously, this all happened before you and Zico slept together or even decided to go public with your relationship but back then you were still happy. You were still you. Jay snapped his fingers in front of your face when you spaced out and you came back to reality and looked at him with a blank face. "What?" you asked. If he had said anything you hadn't heard him. "I was just asking you were okay with everything I explained?" he said. "Uh, yeah I just have to tell Zico about it." you said. "Really? About a music video?" he smirked. "A music video in which you're touching me in a suggestive manner. I'm his girlfriend, he should know." "I didn't think you two would be like that." "Well if your girlfriend were being touched like that by another man would you be happy?" you asked. "You have have a point there. If you were mine I'd do a lot more than Zico did though." he smiled. "I'm sure you would, you'd probably kiss in front of people right?" you said jokingly. He leaned over and his hand touched your thigh. You kept eye contact trying to show that you weren't fazed by his hand but you were. You felt a tingle go up your body from....Jay? "I'd do more than a kiss baby, my hands and lips would be all over you. I'd leave my mark on display so he knew that you belonged to me. I'd touch you slow and teasingly and make him watch so he knew I was the only one to make you feel that way." he said. Finally, getting too hot and bothered for your own comfort you pushed Jay's hand off your leg. You gave him a small smile to be polite, "But I'm not yours. I'm with Jiho, me and him are dating so please, if you're going to touch me in that manner do it during the filming of your music video only. Out of respect for me and for Jiho." you said. He nodded, "Understood, now I know why you took the name Tiger." He got up and headed to the door, "I'll see you tomorrow Y/N." he said. "Ne." you responded. "Boy what was that all about? Can you spell sexual tension in the room?" You looked up to see Yoojung sort of floating with his leg crossed over the other like he was sitting in a chair. You narrowed your eyes. "You know the more you show up the more annoying you become." He shrugged, "What are brothers for?" You shook your head with a slight smile. "So have you figured out what your problem is?" "Other than you?" you retorted. "Hey now that's just mean, I'm trying to help my dear little sister and you're bullying me? How is that fair? You shouldn't treat your oppa so poorly." he said with a fake pout. You smiled and leaned against the desk, "I remember back when you were in a play in highschool and you asked me how you did and I told you, you did bad. You said the same exact thing to me." "Well what do you expect baby sis?" His voice got soft and he looked at you with tender eyes. The way he always did when he felt bad for you. "I'm just a figment of your imagination, I'm your subconscious talking to you. I'm not really here. These are just words you think I'd say if I were here now." You wiped away growing tears, "I know." you said. "Look just don't do anything you'll regret with Jiho and be mindful of Jay. I'm not sure you should trust him." "Why?" you asked. He simply shrugged. "Just a feeling." Haneul's POV "Hey can I talk to you guys for a second?" Haneul said walking into Heechul and Hae-il's bedroom. Jihoon was sitting on Heechul's bed closest to the door and Heechul sat with Hae-il on his. They had been passing a ball back and forth while singing together, every now and again one of the boys attempted to rap one of Y/N's parts or one of Haneul's. Jihoon caught the ball when Haneul walked in and held it when he asked his question. They all looked at him while Haneul grabbed a chair and sat inbetween the beds. "What's up?" Jihoon asked. Haneul looked to the ground and sighed, "Haven't you guys noticed something's wrong with Y/N lately. For the past few weeks she's just been... off." he said. He saw Hae-il look down almost sad, "She's been short tempered lately. I heard her screaming at Zico earlier today." he said. Jihoon looked to Hae-il surprised, "Wait, what? Why?" he asked. "It sounded like she caught him cheating or she thought he was cheating but he was saying it was for the drama he's in. He didn't tell her I guess so she thought it was a date. She was so upset." Hae-il said. Jihoon crossed his arms and sighed heavily, "Damn it I knew she wasn't ready." "Ready for what?" Heechul asked. "Ready to date, like Haneul said she's been acting different lately but this has started beyond a few weeks ago. She's cut off so many things that she used to do just to make him happy. Then there was the company asking her to lose weight for our comeback eight months ago." "She was unhappy about it I know but she seemed fine afterwards." Haneul said. "But you remember how cranky she got? I'm telling you Y/N isn't ready to be in a relationship. Plus she has the company changing her image, she's preparing for a solo mixtape, she's working over time for our mini album, she's taking heat from making their relationship public and she's getting harassed for her weight loss. She's wearing herself down and she won't talk to us about it cause she's stubborn as hell. She's our leader and she doesn't want to bother us with her problems so she's taking it out the only way she know how, through her work." Jihoon explained. "She's not even doing that anymore. She'll go to the practice room if she's really frustrated but she's stopped writing. She hasn't been in the studio for a week. She has a solo mixtape coming out and she's not doing anything for it. The only time we see her is if we're working but on days off like this she doesn't even hang out anymore. I know she's unhappy." Haneul said. Heechul looked to Jihoon, "She normally talks to you doesn't she? Has she said why she's doing this?" he asked. Jihoon shook his head, "She doesn't talk to me anymore. It's like our friendship has taken a dramatic shift. That's why I didn't want her dating in the first place. She's changing too much; she doesn't even feel like the same person anymore." "It's because she's not." Haneul mumbled. "So what do we do?" Hae-il asked. Haneul looked to the ground, Y/N had been avoiding him as best she could since he got upset at Zico flaunting that they were together. Before he was able to pass by it, he got that she liked him but he just got sick of the teasing he did. His feelings for her hadn't died yet and it seemed they only got stronger the more Zico teased that she was his. In reality, Zico was probably only showing the natural affection that any boyfriend would show his girlfriend but the fact that Haneul still liked her made everything irritating and seem like he was just doing it to piss him off. He didn't want her to ignore him though, he missed staying up late to make music with her. They rushed into things after her brother died. It still made his heart ache thinking of how she didn't believe that he was dead and how she tried to call him. Anytime she was in pain it hurt his heart and he hated how he couldn't help her fix this. To Jihoon's point, after the company asked her to lose weight for their comeback, she had gotten really angry. She just wanted to be left alone. She stopped smiling as much and she pushed them out. They didn't play video games with each other any more, they didn't eat together any more, they were always missing their leader during quality time. He had noticed Jihoon was growing frustrated by it too. Jihoon was the closest one to her; he had known her for years, since they were in grade school together. The fact that she was cutting him out now was like taking a smoker off cigarettes cold turkey. There was no gradual cut back, she just stopped talking to him. Every now and again he'd cherish the moments she'd come to him, like when she snuck into their room to sleep next to him during the thunder storm. Haneul still didn't know why she was afraid of thunder, he never thought to ask. Jihoon probably didn't know either, he probably didn't care, it was just a known fact that if there was a thunder storm she was going to be sleeping beside Jihoon. One night she didn't because she had stayed with Zico but she was probably fine because she wasn't alone. Haneul some how got the feeling this went beyond just her trying to satisfy her boyfriend. It seemed like she had just lost herself. She had stopped acting the way she used to and it was just confusing all of them, it was like she wasn't having fun anymore being an idol and anytime she was in front of people she had just faked her smile. She barely touched the members anymore. She didn't even wake up Jihoon anymore. "It's killing me but she won't stay in the same room with me long enough for me to ask what's wrong." Haneul said. "Same here." Jihoon said. He was now laying back on Heechul's bed spinning the ball in his hands. "She doesn't hug me anymore." Heechul said. "She doesn't try and kiss us anymore. She's there for us but it's like she's not even really here." Hae-il said. "She doesn't even like to get out of bed, some days she just stays locked in her room alone." Heechul said. They all sat their silent and slightly depressed themselves. Jihoon's phone rang and he went into his pocket and sat up. "Hello?" he answered. There was a moment before Jihoon's face twisted in confusion, "H-hold on hyung what do you mean she stormed out what happened? Where did she go?" All the boys were now paying attention to the conversation waiting to hear what he said next, "Wait you did what? What the hell- look just stay away from her for now I'll go out and find her. I'll text you when I do." Jihoon said. He hung up the phone and Haneul said, "What happened?" Jihoon sighed frustrated and stood up, "Y/N caught Zico and that girl Yoona kissing in the studio." he explained. "What?" Haneul said pissed. "Relax, he said it wasn't what it seemed, she kissed him and he pushed her off of him but by that time Y/N had already seen the kiss. She broke up with him and stormed off. He tried to stop her apparently but she got in her car and drove away." Jihoon explained. "She broke up with him?" Heechul asked. "I have to go find her and talk to her." he said heading for the door. "I don't think she'll be in the mood to talk Hyung." Hae-il said. "She won't have a choice." he called back because he was already in the hallway headed for the door. He would let Jihoon take care of her for now. If anyone could get through to her it was him. He'd see if he could talk to her later.... Y/N's POV You went back to the practice room to listen to some of your older songs from when you first debuted. You could hear the changes in your voices and the complexity of your dance moves had changed just in the past three years. You sighed to yourself thinking about how the company decided to revamp your image specifically. It was like they were trying to turn you into a Barbie doll. You didn't think you needed to lose weight you had already lost weight after Yoojung died just from your lack of eating and you dancing too much. You were already malnourished and you had just started eating again. The company saw that you could lose another ten pounds and you'd be perfect. Perfect. That word pissed you off, what the hell did they mean perfect? You were trying to refuse when Jihoon told you to just do it. It was the first time you ever really got offended by Jihoon. You thought out of all people he would be the one to tell you not to but no he was all for it. Nothing was wrong with losing ten pounds. You were skinny enough. You were as small as a person with your build could be and still be healthy. You were a size eight around that time but you had lost more weight and were a size six. Then fans started to tell you to eat because you were too skinny. You looked unhealthy and part of you just wanted to scream you knew. It wasn't from the fans that were genuinely concerned about your health it was from the more ruthless fans. Some how it always came back to an issue that you couldn't sing or you had no talent, which had nothing to do with your weight. What the hell? Did people not know if you can't say anything nice then don't open your damn mouth at all? You know people were entitled to their opinions and they were entitled to not like you but it was beyond hurtful and rude that they said all of this to you. It hurt, it all hurt. It hurt worse than it did two years ago, it hurt more for some reason and you didn't know why. Maybe it was because the wound from Yoojung dying was still fresh. They had complained about you dating Zico which was why you didn't want to reveal you were dating in the first place. It hurt when Jihoon told you to just drop the ten pounds. He was probably trying to be supportive and he was probably thinking about the group. He probably didn't even think it was a big deal, you were never one to really get upset at things like that but that had pissed you off. *eight months ago* "What the hell do you mean just lose the ten pounds?" you yelled at him. "Y/N you're taking it the wrong way I didn't mean you're fat." "Then why do I need to lose the weight Ji?" "The company asked you to." he said. You looked at him like he was insane, "Fuck the company!" you said pissed. "Y/N calm down." "I swear to god Jihoon if you tell me to calm down one more time I will throw a shoe at your damn head." you said rapidly. You were just walking around pissed, "What's going on? Look they asked me to loose weight too it's just a part of the concept." "Jihoon that's not the point, I am fine the way I am. I don't need to change yet now they're saying I'm too big, I'm a size eight! I have a tomboy persona and they're dressing me up like a damn Barbie doll." "As I recalled you liked Barbies when we were in grade school." he said trying to lighten the mood "I will actually punch a hole in your chest." you said. You had been talking with your hands and stopped when you said that. Both your hands closed into fists in front of you. Jihoon sighed, "Y/N it's just a concept after all of it is done you can eat whatever you want. You can have cake and ice cream on the same day." "Screw that I'm eating whatever the hell I damn well want." you said. Afterwards you stormed out. *Present* You actually kept your word and ate whatever you wanted you just exercised longer and cut down your portions by half. It resulted in you passing out one day on the set of a variety show and you were rushed to the hospital. It was a mixture of lack of sleep, lack of food and lack on energy period. Despite having to get it through passing out, it was the best sleep you ever got within a twenty four hour period. After that, Jihoon had made you slow down. He tried cutting you off during workouts and made you add a little more to your diet. You had grown far too skinny and more then ten pounds had been dropped in just three weeks time. You ate junk food for three days straight just to gain something back. Thinking back, that was when everything really started to change for you and you just became unhappy with yourself. You had liked being an idol but so much was changing, you had a boy friend, you had a new image, your brother was dead; it was just too much in the span of a few months and you hated it. You didn't deal with it and that's probably how you got to this point. You shook it off and remembered you had to tell Zico about Jay's video. It was out of respect that you were telling him this would be happening, not just assuming he'd be ok with one of his buddies feeling you up. At the very least he knew Jay, you both did so it wasn't anything too unexpected when it came to him. He was a pretty decent guy to women it was just his songs that were super dirty and maybe when he was in the mood you supposed. You headed down the hallway and made it into the studio only to look up and see Yoona and Zico kissing. What was she even doing here? How could he say he wasn't cheating? He pulled her off of him and looked at you shocked. Yoona was on the drama he was in, she was the female lead. She was very pretty too, skinny, long straight brown hair, she didn't have big thighs like you but she was a beautiful girl. That only pissed you off more, you turned around and walked out. "Y/N wait!" he called after you. You continued down the hallway and he ran up to you grabbing your hand and pulling you back. "Stop, wait it's not what you think." he said. "Get off me!" you said upset. You could feel tears welling up and blurring your vision. "Hold on baby-" "No do not call me that. I am not your baby. I'm not." "Y/N." he said hurt. "This was a mistake, it was." you said. You ripped your arm out of his hands. "Y/N just listen to me." he called as he followed you. "I'm done Zico and just in case you're confused, this time I really am breaking up with you." "Y/N wait." "Bye Zico." you said. You had your back turned to him and tears were falling down your face as you pushed the doors open and walked out of the building. Zico continued to follow you asking you to wait and just listen to him. Mino and B-Bomb saw you and asked what was going on. Mino wanted to know why you were crying but you just shook your head. Zico had caught up to you and you just looked back at him. "Ask him." you said. Your voice sounded broken and his face looked so guilty and in pain. He reached out to touch you but you swatted his hand away and pushed past the boys to get away. You wiped your burning eyes and got into your car and drove off in top speed. You could hear your tires screeching as you went. You drove to a bar nearby and walked in to order a drink. The music playing was really good, they had even played a Jay Park and Ugly Duck song. You drank gin, two beers and taken two shots, when you were on the third your finger traced the rim of the cup wondering if it would be worth taking it. "Damn, he really was cheating I guess. I was rooting for him too." Yoojung said. "Do you only bother me when I'm upset?" you mumbled. "It's the only time you really want me around. Maybe because I'm the first connection to your pain." he said. "So in other words I'm torturing myself." "Yeah you are," he laughed. "Here's the bright side you can always just jump off that hill and come be with me... I'm just kidding don't do that, you'd only make me hate you if you did that." "That's not a half bad idea though, just falling to my death. It's not like things get better." you mumbled. "What the hell did you just say?" Your head snapped up to see Jihoon looking at you pissed. Were you talking out loud? Jihoon grabbed your wrist while throwing money onto the counter to pay for your drinks and he pulled you out of the bar and to the side of the building. "What the hell did you say in there Y/N? What are you thinking?" he said upset. He had you pinned against the wall. "Ji." "No don't you dare do that. Don't you ever say something that fucking stupid again. Are you out of your mind? What is the matter with you?" he said furious. You put your hands to your ears not wanting to hear him and crying at the same time. He pulled your hands away from your face and pushed his forehead against yours. "I would lose my fucking mind if you did that. You would kill me. I don't know what's going on with you, you're not talking to me but tonight you're going to tell me what's going on. You're not going to sleep until you tell me something." "Ji ji." you said crying and trying to pull your arms away. He let your arms go and wrapped his arms around you. Your face buried in his chest as you cried. "It hurts." you cried. "What does?" "Everything, everything hurts. I don't know how to stop it." you cried. You clung to his shirt as his arms wrapped around you tighter. "Damn it Y/N you should've come to me. I should've come to you. Don't you dare push me out ever again. Not when I've been with you through everything you don't get to push me out. You tell me everything, don't you fucking dare leave me don't ever. I never want to go through that with you, just don't leave me." You could hear the fear in his voice that you would do something stupid. He was scared to lose you because he was your best friend. He was always there for you and you had cut him out. You had pushed him away, you had tried to distance him for the sake of making Zico comfortable but you went to the extreme and cut him from everything. You needed him but didn't talk to him because you cut him out. He sounded like he was crying as he talked to you but he held on tight to you as you cried into his chest. He wasn't going to let you go. "Look at that, looks like you found your beginning, let's see if you can follow the rest of the trail." Yoojung said appearing just behind Jihoon. Jihoon was the beginning? He was, because he was the one you opened up to first. The one that protected you, that signed up for dance classes with you. He made this dream with you, he'd fall you to hell and back. He knew your fears, he knew your secrets...he knew you....
Omo I'm crying Tiger just needed her best friend Jihoon!! I can't believe she said she'd fall to her death he'd be so broken up 😭😭😭😭 AND ZICO WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! Side note: I'm sorry but when I read "Firmly Grasp It" my mind went to that spongebob episode πŸ˜‚
yes you got the reference! Success! I was hoping someone would πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
I hate you Zico!😠😭😭😭 She should like kiss or do something with Jay or Hanuel and BAM! Zico gets jealous
What would she do with jihoon and what would he do if she killed herself smh.. So many feels this chapter..
What did I wake up and just read?? OMO!!!!! Damnit Zico, what the hell?????
Lmfao πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚