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“I Lost Fear of Losing What I Never Wanted to Lose Forever” by Lumina H.
“I Lost Fear of Losing What I Never Wanted to Lose Forever” by Lumina H. Once upon a time, in my worst nightmare I screamed in the middle of the night “Don’t Leave Me!” Fear of being abandoned Fear of being rejected Fear of being replaced Horror strikes like lightning Blitz, Blitz, Blitz Every thunder of anxiety electrocuted me I’ve been punched, kicked and screamed at I know all too well how it feels to be treated like dirt I’ve been to hell and back, both inside and outside my head. So what I feared most in this world Was you, of you turning your back on me Never to return, ever. Fear brought anxiety, pain, worry, stress, anger, fury, insomnia and finally tears Buckets, trucks, pools of tears Gradually my tears filled up a swimming pool And in my swimming pool of tears I drowned myself And I needed a CPR But no one came… The water was still trapped in my lungs And I forgot how to breath, how to live I was dying I had seconds to live Could I live again? Could anyone give me new life? Could anyone revive me? Somebody… Anybody… Please help me… In my desperate need, I pleaded, prayed and hoped And then, right then Someone did come to my rescue But He wasn’t you He was unexpected While you left me drowning He came with a thousand letters of love and care I didn’t know Him He was a stranger to me But to him, I was no stranger He had been waiting for me all along He watched me dive into the ocean of tears He watched me as I sunk deeper into the sea of sorrow He always wanted to help me, to save me He never wanted me to drown myself, never He wanted me to live To live without Fear. To live without Fear of abandonment To live without Fear of rejection To live without Fear of replacement To live bravely, fearlessly, hopefully, gratefully To live honestly, courageously, earnestly, kindly To live with everything I had replaced with fear He breathed new air into my lungs Water came spluttering out of my throat My heart started beating again I could feel the blood rushing faster in my veins I’m alive! I’m alive! I’m alive! I’ve been Saved! Saved! Saved! My new savior will show me ways not to be afraid of losing you I’ve already lost you once And from now he will show me never to fear Losing you again and again Because in the far future Fast forward to many years later Here I am The future me said “I lost fear of losing what I never wanted to lose forever” “I lost fear of losing you, who I never wanted to lose, never” So today I wait, I hope, I run, I believe, I trust Towards that future of losing fear of losing you.
Boy Groups That I Wish Would Comeback
This is not a list of disbanded groups, just groups that are still active but haven't had a comeback in awhile! Hotshot (Full Group) Their last full group comeback was 'I'm A Hotshot' back in 2015. They had a comeback in November of 2018 but Sungwoon was still with Wanna One at the time. Now Sungwoon is out of Wanna One but is promoting solo, but still in the group. B.I.G B.I.G's last comeback was in 2017. Benji recently released a solo song though! Heedo and Gunmin were in a dance video in July too. J-Hoon is currently serving his mandatory military service sadly. Cross Gene There last music video (a b-side off their latest album) 'Believe Me' was released in May of 2018. It's going to be weird seeing them without Takuya but yeah I need a comeback! Imfact Okay it's only been 7 months since their last comeback but 7 months too long. I need another! Lucente It's been a year since your debut where you at?? Come back! MAP6 Their last comeback was in 2017. Come back to me!!! MyName Their last comeback was in 2015, where you at my boys? I know some had military service but yeah where you been? Are you still together? MVP It's been over two years since your debut? Comeback babies you were so good! XENO-T (Topp Dogg) They did have a Japanese comeback in 2018 but still!!! U-Kiss I mean I know this is impossible but still. Jun is like the only member that can promote and I don't see it being likely that Soohyun and Hoon stay in the group after returning from their service but we'll see. Varsity It's been over a year guys!!! Vermuda It's been over two years since you dropped this hella good debut on us. Where are you? Victon Bring my babies back it's been over a year. I know Seungwoo can't be with them but still!! I need my Seungsik! UNIQ It's been like 3ish years since you dropped Best Friend. I've seen Yixuan on a Chinese program, Seungyoun with MOLA and on Produce X 101. WHERE HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN? Royal Pirates Comeback please!! B1A4 I mean this is just military service and stuff preventing them from coming back but I miss them! Also some mentions: VIXX (but they seem to be planning something so I thought I wouldn't mention them just in case they comeback) High4 (I'm not sure if they are still a group or not? So I won't mention them.) I know all of these are probably because: 1. The company is sleeping on them 2. People are sleeping on them 3. The company is lacking the funds 4. Military Services demanding Members but still that doesn't make me miss them any less! What groups do you miss that haven't come back in awhile?
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