So, I need to talk about this last Chapter that I feel I need to give a little clarification on. Before I start, this isn't because anyone made a comment, it's not because I was offened, I love your comments, I love getting advice, I love being told when you're not happy with something or that you wanted something different because then I know where to imporve and what I need to work on. Honestly, it's because in my opinion it was a shit Chapter and a shit ending. This isn't a pitty party I just want to talk about this ending.
I want to be honest, I rushed the last few chapter's. Honestly, I was ready to just end the story I had run out of inspiration. I actually think I burned myself out in the creative department, whatever, I'm okay with that I'll take a break and then come back with something hopefully much better.
As the writer of the story, I just feel like I missed some big points in this story but I left hints for the readers to kind of gauge the relationship happening between Y/N and Kiseok for themselves. I feel like I may have not given enough detail or explained myself or maybe the details were just too obscure. So let's just talk about this for a minute.
Now before I start, Yes there will be spoilers so if you haven't finished all of Belong to them or if you haven't even read it, this card isn't for you just yet (or maybe ever cause you won't read it lol) :D
Okay, my recent stories have had a lot of BDSM relationship dynamics in them. Honestly, this didn't start because of Fifty shades of Grey, although maybe it had something to do with it. This trend for me started when a few friends sent me a link to find out what kind of Kink I was in BDSM (I know me and my friends are weird but that's why we love each other). We all took the test but as we talked about the results I got really intrested in the dynamics of BDSM relationships and started doing my own research about them to create really great stories.
Playmate was probably the better of the BDSM stories. I mean Playmate compared to Belong to them I actually favor Playmate, it is my longest fan fic but it had way more details. It got a little slow at the end where it was kind of like "okay let's end this" but all in all Playmate was the better one of the two.
Anyway, I did go and look up BDSM relationships and I've been using my favorite kinds in my stories.
Look I know what you're about to say but just let me finish.
During my research I've kind of discovered there are levels to BDSM. Mind you these levels are based off my own personal opinion.
Soft-This is the level I (personally) believe everyone has gone through if you've had sex or fantazied about sex. This is the blindfold, handcuff stage where you don't go deep into too much punishment other than maybe spanking or orgasam denial. I personally believe this is the level where it's specifcally only in the bedroom. Whatever role you take on with your mate it is only when you two are making sweet sweet love (or you know hot passionate love)
Moderate- This is the level where, from what I've learned, you can either take on your roles in real life and the bedroom. I would also place the people that take on the roles in real life but never have sex with their partner in the category. I actually read a girl's account that she shared that she was her best friend's pet and they never had sex but he would pet her and treat her like a kitty, give her treats, make her do tricks. Her friend's girlfriend hated it for obvious reason but this is a good example of two people in their roles but never actually have sex. This is also a stage where I think there's a little more exploration, more punishments, in depth role play. It gets kinky and nasty but it's probably a comfortable state in BDSM where you're not too hardcore but you're not vanilla af.
Hardcore/ Extreme- This is the kind of level I feel only in depth Masochists and Sadists can exist. I've seen some wild shit man and people in this level are into blood, kidnapping scenes, torture devices, piercings, the electric shock shit. This is a level I will NEVER write about because personally my intrests can only go so far, Moderate is my limit. This is also the level where I believe you never leave your role not even if you're not around your Master/Sub. There are people like that, that just never leave the role because that's just who they are. This is the level where subs give EVERYTHING to their Masters and I mean everything. They don't own anything, they have no jobs, their soul purpose is to please their Master or dominate, complete control. That's a little too much devotion to one person for me.
I've mapped out Y/N and Kiseok's relationship as Moderate/hardcore here's why.
When the story beings the phrase "I can do anything to you no questions asked" is used and then quoted quite often in the series. This is the driving force of their relationship it's why it worked for two years and then ultimately led to them crashing and burning.
In a normal relationship, communication is such a HUGE key factor in keeping it healthy. In a BDSM relationship, communication is TWICE as important. These types of relationship's need guidelines, people even get contracts, that's not just a 50 shades plot because he's got a gagillion dollars people actually do get contracts. Not everyone but often times they do. They do this so there's a record of the things a sub will do for their dom and in turn the things that a dom will do for their sub. Also (to me the most important thing) what a dom can and can't do to their sub. Such as:
If you had a dom that was into anal and you were cool with that, you could say I'm down for anal, whatever but if he mentions anal fisting and you're heart stops and you feel like he's insane then you have the right to say absolutely not. That's a hard limit meaning they can NEVER do this to you. Consent is such a big thing in BDSM which is why communication is important, if they don't know they can't do something someone can get hurt. If a safeword isn't said when one feels uncomfortable then someone CAN get hurt. Consent, Communication and limits are so important.
The simple remark that Kiseok could do anything to Y/n no questions asked is so dangerous and I was trying to hint to the readers that this is where it all goes down hill. She never gave him a guideline of what he could and couldn't do to her she literally said he could do ANYTHING and she would just fucking follow it.
I mean she had a safe word but it's not like she was using that safe word when he was telling her she couldn't work.
Kiseok was kind of in that hardcore field, he didn't necessarily need to take anything from her because when they met she didn't have anything to really begin with. She was perfect for his lifestyle. Y/N however started to notice that her freedoms were limited and although she loved being a sub (which is why she was still using the term "Master" when she slept with Mintaek even after a year apart from Kiseok). Y/n liked roughness there was no specific reason why, she just did.
Without a proper discussion, Y/n, over her two year relationship with Kiseok, not only fell in love but got her heart broken because she never set her own rules for him to follow: she merely obeyed.
Now, Kiseok wanted obedience and he surely got it. The more she started to be less obedient the more they fought but it wasn't necessarily because he was upset about his hold on her slipping it was because he could feel that distance she was creating between them.
Kiseok has never told a woman he's loved them before so when he felt it for the first time it was such a foreign feeling he was just kind of ignoring it. He wouldn't admit he loved her. Even when she said she was nothing but a slave to him he simply told her she knew that wasn't true but he himself couldn't voice that he loved her for two reasons: his guilt and his fear. Kiseok could feel it, that she was distancing herself from him and he was just unaware that these strong feelings were really love.
Kiseok knew his cheating was bad that's where he first felt it which was why he didn't give her the ring when he bought it six months before their break up. His solution was, stupidly, to let Jay and Mintaek sleep with her, don't get me wrong they were there to protect her too because of her assualt but as a way of letting her get revenge on him he let her sleep with them. He felt like it was an even trade almost. This was something I probably didn't write too well during the story. Sorry.
So let's think about this. Kiseok is, yes, an ass for cheating and his logic is completely fucked but he does love Y/n.
Y/n still wants to be a sub but she wants freedom, she just needs some breathing room. As much as she loves Kiseok she isn't completely happy with him being her only reason to live. She wants to do something with herself, most of her life she's been nothing now she wants to be something.
Neither one of them are communicating this properly.
She refuses to talk to him because she feels like since she agreed to do everything he asked with no question that she doesn't necessarily have the right to say no. Even Kiseok said that he may have stripped her of her clothes but he never took away her freedom to feel and think for herself. That's not the type of submission he wants he's just a bit of a control freak.
Kiseok isn't voicing his love, which further pushes Y/n away and the more she disobeys and the more he loses control the more he fears losing her. Which is why he begs her to stay in the shower. Kiseok won't admit it to himself but he knew she wasn't going to stay.
I hinted that when I had Jay say that Kiseok's not stupid, even he had to know Y/n couldn't be his little play thing forever.
Jay encouraged her to talk to him; he knew that the communication, or rather lack there of, was what was killing them. Both Mintaek and Jay could see how much, not only, Y/n felt for Kiseok but how Kiseok felt for Y/n, which is why Jay says he's going to die of a broken heart when he realizes Y/n's already made up her mind to leave.
I mean for the sake of plot I didn't have them talk but if I were to redo the ending she would've stayed, she would've started working and then progressively Kiseok would've losened up. The one thing Kiseok always wanted besides her safety was for her to be happy. He missed the times he came home and she was happy and excited to see him. Kiseok was her first reason for feeling important and living but she didn't want that to be the only thing. She wasn't about material things, she wanted him but she wanted to have a purpose and had they talked like they should have they would've probably made it and Kiseok would've seen that he was an ass and her getting a job benefited her happiness.
Alright here's the point I'm trying to make.
One: It was a shit ending I'm sorry. :'(
Two:I gave another hint, I hope someone picked up on it. When Y/n wakes up in the end, she asks Kiseok what he's doing and he said he sent men to her place to get her furniture. I mean they're getting married obviously she's going to live with him duh (lol). She mentions how fast that was that he found her place. He literally in the matter of hours found where she lived and had men go take her shit. He also said he bought the rabbit (Seonghwa ;p) after she left, meaning he actually already knew where she was for an entire year.
Here's why he didn't go after her for that entire year, this part I actually left out because I forgot about it. I was typing and writing and I just wanted to end it so I forgot and didn't even put it in there but it is an important part.
Kiseok knew where she was the moment she found her new place. Her agency was right across from Jay's building even he would've had to have seen her come in once or twice. He never went after her because he knew she was gone. He never brought her the rabit because he knew trying to convince her to obey him wouldn't work. The reality that their realtionship and that dynamic of their relationship was over hit him for real and he knew that she was gone but he still loved her and wanted her back. Here's the thing Kiseok also knew it was something she had to do and he had to let her go which is the reason why he drank. Kiseok didn't suffer from "Don't know what you have until it's gone" not he suffered from "he knew what he had, he just didn't think she'd leave". The reason he follows Jay and he goes to get her back is because he himself over the past year of depression, loss of inspirtaion, and drinking, he knew in order to get the girl he loved back he had to change. The rule that she had to do whatever he asked no questions asked had to change, he had to take it and throw it out the window and say fuck it. It took him three years to tell him he loved her but she's the first person he's ever admitted that too. Y/n was everything to him, she was his muse and when she left it was kind of like he was in Y/n's situation when they met. He had nothing and he was nothing.
Imagine loosing someone that important, that significant to you. Wouldn't you do anything necessary to get them back?
All in all, they really loved each other they just didn't communicate well. As the writer I'd say that their Master/ slave relationship continued during their marriage but there were more restrictions on what Kiseok could and couldn't do to her. I'd say that Kiseok still had trouble with giving up control but he tries his best for her. I'd say Y/n voices her opinion more but she still loves to submit to him. I'd even say that when they have kids she gives him a lot more restrictions but neither one of them ever truly stops playing their roles because a sub is what Y/n is and a Master is what Kiseok is.
So I'm going to apologize again for the shit chapter and shit ending. After I finish up with Chanyeol's story Will you be... I will take a bit of a break. I'll refresh, maybe read some more. Finish the Jay park and Jongin one then start Cha Cha's maybe. Either way when I come back from the break I hope to have done better writting and give you guys some great stories. Thanks for reading this long ass explanation lol.
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