hskswife
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once 2 || m. yoongi fanfic

o n e You two had finally arrived at the party. You were greeted with the smell of alcohol and music blasting so loud your ears were ringing. You looked around to see that the only person who looked familiar was Nana aside from Yoongi's friends of course. But they're the last people you actually want to see right now. "Nana don't leave me okay!" You shouted as you turned to see what your best friend had been up to but she was already gone. You found her by the refreshments already talking up a guy. You rolled your eyes as you looked around some more hoping to find someone you knew.But instead in the corner you saw a familiar figure. It was Yoongi but strangely enough Hyeri wasn't anywhere to be found. You continued to watch him. For a second you thought that your eyes had met but you knew that Yoongi would no longer look at you so it must've been your imagination. You turned around to find Hyeri locking lips with Taehyung. One of the guys in Yoongi's group. You shook your head as you headed towards the back yard. "None of my business." You whispered to yourself. You weren't in there long but you had already felt stuffy in the house with barely enough space to move and the loud music hurting your ears. You and Yoongi have been to parties before but you have always hated them. You adjusted yourself so that Yoongi can enjoy himself but there was no need for that anymore. You slid the door open stepping out closing the door behind you. When you stepped out you realized you weren't alone. He looked at you as you sat down by the pool removing your shoes and placing your feet in the water. "Are you allowed to do that?" You laughed a little at the boy,"I'm sure he won't mind." "Right. Is it okay if I?" He said as you looked up at him pointing to the spot next to you,"Go ahead." He then pulled up the bottom of his jeans and removed his shoes placing his feet in the water. "Not into the party scene either huh?" He shook his head,"No its just I don't know anybody. I just moved here and Jongdae brought me here but he already went on his own. What about you?" You looked down at the water,"I went here with my best friend but she ditched me." You both laughed as he held out his hands,"I'm Park Chanyeol. You are?" You gave him a gentle smile as you took his hand firmly gripping it as you shook them,"Byun Y/N. Nice to meet yo--" "Yoongi I already told you--" You looked behind you to see an arguing Hyeri and Yoongi. You figured they weren't as happy as you thought they were. You watched as Yoongi looked at you then at Chanyeol. "Sorry we'll leave. Let's go Y/N." You watched as Chanyeol stood up and held out a hand for you while holding his shoes in the other. You nodded as you took his hands as he helped you pull yourself up from the water as you held your shoes with the other hand. "You guys don't have to leave. Yoongi and I weren't discussing anything impor--" "Nothing important? So all of a sudden you kissing other guys isn't important." Hyeri rolled her eyes as she grunted in frustration. "I already fucking told you Taehyung came on to me!" You scoffed catching her attention,"What?" You were so ready to spit back ready to shoot down whatever lies she was going to spit out. "Woah don't take this out on her." Chanyeol said as he placed his hands on your wrist pulling you back while stepping in front of you. You didn't notice because you two were just sitting earlier but he towered over you completely. You then touched his arm with your free hands as continued to hold onto your other hand. "It's fine Chanyeol." You looked at Yoongi and Hyeri,"Sorry for disrupting you we'll go now. You can discuss or argue or whatever you two were doing." You then let go of Chanyeol's arm and headed inside the house as he followed you,"Y/N!" You heard Yoongi scream making you turn your head,"How you been?" Just peachy. You gave him the sweetest smile you can muster to a man who had just broken your heart to pieces last month,"Fine. I'll see you around." "I'll pick up my things soon." You nodded as you turned around this time heading for the front door. Tears were swelling up inside you again. You thought that you were ready to see him again but you were wrong. It was still too much for your heart to handle. When the tears threatened to come out someone had grabbed your wrist. It was Chanyeol. You had almost forgotten that Chanyeol was following you. "Are you okay?" He leaned in towards your ear making sure you can hear him through the loud music. You then gave him a smile and nodded talking back into his ears,"I'm fine." He then leaned forward again,"Want to leave?" You bit your lip as you looked around looking for Nana. Who was nowhere to be found. You figured that she had already left. So you turned to Chanyeol and nodded. It wouldn't hurt to have someone walk you home right? It's a dangerous world out there. But what if he was one of those dangerous men? You had just met him but for some reason you felt more at peace than scared of him. You two had finally put your shoes back on as you headed to your apartment. The cold air making you rub your arms the friction warming you up a little. Chanyeol had noticed this as he placed his jacket around you. "No it's okay you need it too." You said as you took it off but he placed his hands on your shoulders stopping you from returning the jacket,"No it's fine the alcohol is keeping me warm." You giggled a little as you nodded and put your arms through the jacket. "Is that so?" He smiled innocently at you as he nodded. There was a silence for a while as you two approached the end of the street you notice him biting his lip as if though mustering up the courage to ask you something. "I know we just met but it's killing me. Who was that guy?" You looked down on your feet as you placed your hands in the pockets of the jacket. "Which guy?" "The small angry one." You laughed at his description of Yoongi,"He was my ex...he cheated on me with that girl you saw earlier." You felt your heart aching all over again. You knew you weren't over Yoongi and maybe seeing him again tonight made everything worse. Making your pathetic attempt of getting over him seem useless and in vain. Just the way your name rolled off his lips made you fall back into his arms if he asked you to. You felt the warm droplets of your tears stream down your face. "Why did he say he was going to pick up his things from your apartment?" You sniffled wiping away the tears as they come,"We just broke up a month ago. This party was supposed to be a distraction as my best friend calls it." You laughed as you emphasized on the word distraction. To your surprise Chanyeol stopped walking and cupped your cheeks as he used his thumbs to wipe away the tears that streamed down your face. "Don't waste these precious tears on a douche bag like him Y/N." You felt your heart beat racing. "Thanks Chanyeol..." He smiled as he grabbed one of your hands and held onto them as the two of you continued walking down the road to your apartment. When you two had finally arrived you smiled at Chanyeol,"Thanks for taking me here." When you were about to walk in Chanyeol grabbed your hand,"Wait. Can I get your number?" You smiled as you held out your hand as he gave a confused look,"Your phone?" He then smiled as he pulled out his phone from his back pocket while nodding,"Right." He said while placing his phone in your hands. You quickly dialed your number. Your phone started to ring as you held it up. "Just to let you know I'm not scamming you." He laughed. "Right. I never even thought of you giving me a fake number. But even if you did I'll find you." You laughed as you took off his jacket and handed it back to him. "Thanks...for tonight. You made my evening less boring." "Alright well I'll take you out on a date soon and you'll see how much more fun I can be." You laughed as you finally said your farewells and you walked into your apartment. You have never felt so happy since these past few weeks. You were glad you met Chanyeol tonight. You were glad that Nana had forced you to go to this party. As you were preparing yourself for bed you had received a text message: Unknown [12:05 am]: Goodnight Y/N...I know this may sound weird especially because we just met but I'm glad Jongdae ditched me. You [12:05 am]: Not weird at all I was def thinking the same thing. Well for me it's Nana not Jongdae lol but Goodnight Chanyeol! This lady needs her beauty sleep. You smiled as you closed your phone making sure that your alarm was on so you won't miss your class in the after noon. ⚜ House Of Disquietude Taglist ⚜ Queens/Kings; @geekywriterabby @Bangtanss @AimeeH @Lexxcisco @SkyBlast @Jaerinn @hskswife @MelissaGarza @SaraDarWish Royalty Family; @AbbyRoscoe @SugaKookieV @LemonLassie @SimplyAwkward @KenyaMendoza @SarahHibbs @EmilyCayetano @twistedPuppy @sarahdarwish If you want to be tagged/untagged please go ahead and ask in the comments below. 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yay chanyeol take me away from this evil man (hahaha jk yoongi has me hooked #cantlivewithoutsuga)
kshdhskak 😂😂😂
please tag me
of course!!
i really love the story 😁 I was wondering if you could tag me in your cards? please?
of course!!
Yessss the baee. You go Chanyeol!! 😍😍
😱😱😱😱😲 loving it already
thank you!!!
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Nocturnal Creature Jun Myeon 54 (19+)
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I'm His Noona ft. Rapmon A.k.a Kim Nam Joon
They crack me up so much, they don't need enemies with friends like them. So, its been awhile, I've been busy. I have writer's block with my series called First Time in Korea. I don't know if I should kill someone or not, LOL!! Just kidding...maybe not....I don't even know. Let me know if you want to be tagged or un-tagged in future stories. Thank you!! I come into the kitchen, after getting home from school. I left early because today was Senior skip day, but I didn't want to stay home. I know my mom would make me clean the house, if she knew I didn't have to go to school. I'm home alone, I'm making some Mac n Cheese, so when my sister comes home, she can grab a plate. She's a year younger than me, but she's like my best friend. I grab my plate and head to the living room to watch a scary movie. I love scary movies, I like to predict what will happen and who the killer might be. I was so engrossed with the movie that I didn't hear the door knob twist open and close. On the TV, the last victim is cornered and is face to face with the killer. At that exact moment where the killer lunges at them, I jumped and screamed because someone tapped my shoulder. I look behind me and I see a blonde haired guy doubled over laughing. "Namjoon, You're a freaking Jerk!!! How many times have I told you not to come to my house uninvited?" I said, vehemently. He stood to his full height and swiped the tears from his laughing fit. He smiled, dimples poking out, "Sorry, I couldn't resist, Sweet Cheeks. Why would you watch them by yourself, if you get scared by watching it?" "It's my preference and none of your business. AND don't call me that." I grabbed my plate from the couch and walked to the kitchen. As I strolled to the sink, I said over my shoulder, "You almost ruined my outfit and you would have to pay for that." I'm washing the plate, when I hear him entering the kitchen. "Nice shoes, (y/n)." I smirked, I love these shoes and my favorite celeb loves them too. I blush and giggle, thinking about him. I turn around and see Namjoon playing with my sunglasses. Oh no!! "Namjoon, give that to me, before you break it. Just go home, my sister won't be home for at least 30 minutes." He looks up and smirks, "I'm not gonna break it, I just want to wear it." As he goes to put it on, I rush over to him to grab it from him, but I have the worst luck. "WHAT DID YOU DO!?!?!?" I screamed at him. He flinched and looked down. He looked remorseful, but I didn't care about his feelings. Those glasses were given to me by my favorite celebrity. Now, I won't have a memento from that time I met him. I grabbed the glasses from him and my emotions just overwhelmed me and all I felt was Hate. "Get the hell out of here, you piss me off, just looking at you makes me irritated. I don't even know why you even hang out here when my sister isn't here, you just want to make my life a living hell, don't you? No wonder you don't have a girlfriend, you'd break her in half." While I was saying all this, he was taking it with a solemn face but when I mentioned girlfriend, his face got so red and not from being embarrassed, but from anger. He came closer to me and stood chest to chest, which made my head tilt back to see his face. His voice was deep and controlled, it made me blink a few times to realize he's telling me something. "Look, I get that your mad about your glasses but that was a low blow. If you weren't so slow and stupid, you'd realize why I hang out here when your sister isn't." All I got from that was him calling me slow and stupid. I poked him in the chest, "Did you just call me slow and stupid?" He grinned, my face must've been red because I felt steam coming out of my nostrils from his stupid cute dimpled smile. 'Cute, him, WTH, (y/n)' Each word I said came with a poke to his chest shoving him closer to the wall, "I'm"*poke* "You're" *poke* "Noona. Don't disrespect me, Got it?" He smiled again, which irritated me even more. "What the hell is wrong with you? You know what, I'm done. I'm done with you, I don't want to see you. If you come by to see my sister, that's fine, but I'm not ..." He grabbed my face, staring into my eyes. I was shocked at his gesture, 'WTH is he doing?' His eyes lowered to my lips and at that, my lips parted, releasing a sigh. With my face in his hands, he leaned closer and closer until our lips where a centimeter away. His gaze never wavering from my lips, I closed my eyes, waiting for him to close the distance. After a few heartbeats, I open my eyes and I see him smiling, his head resting on the wall. I can't believe I fell for this, I'm so embarrassed. I feel tears threatening to fall. I grab his hands and pull it from my face. I turn around and start running to my room. I hear him right on my heels, his hand grabbing my arm and pulling me close to him. I struggle against him, not wanting to be embraced. "Why? Why are you doing this to me?" I look at him, tears streaming down my face. He carefully wipes them with his thumb. Then, sweetly kisses my eyelids, then my cheeks, my jawline, the corner of my mouth. My whole body melting from his sweet kisses. I don't know why I'm letting him get away with this, but I don't want to stop him and his kisses. He stopped and looked into my eyes. He must've seen the effect he's having on me as a sign, he gave me a chaste kiss. Once I released the breath, I didn't know I was holding, he kissed me a bit more passionate. I wrapped my arms around his neck and his arms coiled around my waist, making our bodies fuse together. I don't know if I couldn't breathe because of the kiss or his hold on me, but I liked it. He trailed candy kisses all over my neck and bit my ear, I moaned his name, he pulled away at the sound of his name. He leaned his forehead against mine. I heard a ping from my phone, I pulled away from him and reached my phone from my back pocket. A text from my sister, telling me that she's staying after school for a project. I pocketed the phone, "Who is it?" said Namjoon, quietly. I was still reeling back from the kiss and before I knew it, I gave him my sassiness, "It's none of your concern." His eyes narrowed and began to walk towards me, I backed up until I felt my bedroom door behind me. I turned to open it and his hand landed against the door to keep me from opening it. He pressed his body on mine, I was between two solid walls. He swept my hair to the side, exposing the back of my neck. "(Y/N), I asked you a question." He kissed my ear and trailed down to my neck and the back of my neck, sending thrills down my spine. "I have the right whether or not to answer it. Plus, you haven't answered mine." He whispered, "What is it?" I turn to face him. "Why are you doing this? Is this to get revenge on me from earlier?" He shook his head and looked up at the ceiling, then back down to me. "You really are slow." He saw that I was about to rip him a new one, when he quickly said, "I wouldn't do this for revenge. Why do you think that I spend time here, when your sister isn't around?" I tilt my head in confusion, "Because you're waiting for her to come home from school?". "Because I like you, (y/n)." He smiled and at that moment, I had butterflies fluttering in my tummy. ****Few Years Later**** "Namjoon, hurry, you're gonna miss it. Bring the camera." I see Namjoon running back and forth through the doorway. Since that day he confessed to me, we have been inseparable. We went to the same college but I graduated first since I'm a bit older than him. My family was worried that we were too young to be together and they didn't want to pick sides if we were to break up. The most amazing thing is after he graduated, he proposed and each day is a blessing to be with him. "Babe, I got the camera. What's going on?" he kisses the top of my head as he sits next to me on the bed. "Look, at this cutie. Thank God, he looks like me and not you." I giggle, trying to rile him up. He gives me a look, like he's going to get back at me later. But, I have a surprise for him too. "Give me the camera." He gives it to me and I turn it on. I take a picture of my baby boy and then, Namjoon. I keep the focus on him and press record. "Honey, what would you do if you came home to find me and two other guys in bed?" His face said it all. "Don't play like that." "What if I told you in advanced, that way you're prepared to see it?" He leans over and bites my shoulder, causing me to laugh and fall on my back. The camera still recording. "Well, in nine months, you'll find out whether or not, I'm playing." He stood up, about to say something, then he started laughing and smiling. I pressed stop and put the camera down. I opened my arms and he crawled on the bed and laid his body between my legs and his head on my tummy. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I looked at him and saw a few tears escaping his eyes, he kissed me and then, buried his face in the crook of my neck. This man makes me fall for him, harder each day. "I love you, Namjoonie." His voice choked up with emotion, whispers. "I love you and our babies." If you want to be tagged or untagged, please comment below. 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Trauma Ch.11
Who: Reader x Kim Junmyeon What: Angst, Romance, Smut Story: You're just two trauma filled people trying to live normal lives... but trauma is a bitch Y/N's POV "Wait a minute, I'm a little confused. Start from the beginning." You said. Your mother looked at Junmyeon than you again. She sighed and her thumbs toyed with each other as she started to explain her story. "Haejin and I were very close in high school. We had a brief moment where we kissed and that's what started it all. Our generation wasn't very accepting of those kinds of relationships so, when we graduated we decided to end our secret affair. We went to different colleges and started our own lives-" "So when did you two decide to hook back up? Before or after you got pregnant with us?" You asked. There was spite in your voice, you were angry and annoyed with her. Being able to face her was both therapeutic and upsetting. You always envisioned her living a grander life, having a new husband and a new family. You always wondered if you had disappointed her, if you weren't enough for her but here she was in front of you looking the opposite of what you imagined or even remembered. Your mother had class, and smarts, she had an alluring smile that was magnifying. When everyone said you looked like your mother, you felt it was the biggest compliment to you because she was the most beautiful woman you knew. Now, as you looked at her face: old, worn, tired with half life and watching her sit slightly hunched over you felt disgrace and pity. You didn't want to be compared to her and as you listened to her story you wanted even less to be known as her daughter. "When you were four, Haejin spotted me in Itaewon. We rekindled our friendship. We caught up and talked about our families and as time went by, those feelings showed themselves again. I don't think they ever went away. We just knew it wasn't possible. We knew it was wrong but- we loved each other." She said. "I remember her coming over and you two talking alot. It seemed like a normal friendship even when Papa wasn't around." "If you had seen us, even by accident, I wouldn't have been able to explain it to you. I knew your father would be hurt if he found out and children are prone to slipping up. You once told your father she was over the house could you imagine how he would've reacted if he knew about the affair?" "Gee, I don't know. Perhaps he would've tried to kill you kinda like he tried to kill me two weeks ago." She looked at you wide eyed. Her hand went to her heart and you felt yourself cringe from her reaction. Despite it being genuine, you felt like her concerns for you weren't real enough. "Inho tried to kill you? How is that possible he adored you?" "But he hates you!" You snapped. "You left him, us , without a trace, without a fucking reason Seol; what did you expect? He's bipolar and he was hurt and everytime he looked at me he saw you. He saw the woman that broke his heart, that abandoned him. The woman who took vows to stand beside him for life and just threw it to the fucking wind. He hated me for looking like you so for fifteen years I was caught in between my father's war of loving me as his daughter and hating me as yours. He went off his meds, back and forth from dotting father to raging asshole. All so I didn't repeat the cycle. I couldn't turn out like you. I couldn't leave him because he wouldn't survive, because of the selfish decisions you made, my childhood was a living hell." "Y/N I'm sorry." She said. Her voice scratched like she was trying to hold back tears. She almost sounded pathetic but you were too upset to even care how she felt. You didn't think she had the right. You stood up ready to leave but she cried out for you. "Y/N let me explain please." You whipped around stalking up towards her, your eyes burned with tears threatening to spill over but even more anger and hatred towards her spilled out. "Explain what? Explain how all this time you were a twenty five minute train ride away? Explain why you didn't call or visit? Explain why you never said a fucking word and just walked out on me! I was your own flesh and blood and you abandoned me to a wolf!" Junmyeon stood up and grabbed you; he held you tightly to him. Your chest heaved up and down and you willed all your emotion to stay down, to just wait until she couldn't see how much your heart was breaking. As angry as you were with your mother, deep down you wanted to forgive her. You wanted her to have a good reason why she disappeared, one worth accepting so that as you lost your father you gained your mother. When the trees bloomed in spring, she would take you to the park, you two would walk around and she'd ask you what you saw in the park. You watched clouds together and visited the Han river at night. When it snowed, she would have a snowball fight with you and drink hot chocolate with you under blankets while you all watched movies. Your early life was filled with childhood memories you clung to because they were beautiful and distant. They seemed untouchable but it was all you ever desired. You lived with hope you'd have your family back one day and when that hope died you just wanted your father to love you. All you ever wanted was someone to love you and it felt like your cat might've been the only one truly did. You calmed down and pulled away from Junmyeon but when you looked up at him you realized something...he cared about you. You two slept together but it wasn't just sex, if it was, why would he do all of this: comfort you and go with you to visit your estranged mother. Someone that wasn't invested wouldn't do this. Yet, you were afraid that you weren't capable of a healthy love; you didn't really know what that was. You were subservient to Heechul, was that why he cheated? You held your own secrets from him, you kept him locked out but you were at his beck and call. Minseok was always your friend, staying close to you, making sure you were alright but there was never anything romantic between you two. You didn't really understand what it meant to be in love. You looked back at your mother, calm now and Junmyeon had you sit back down. "I left because I felt guilty for Haejin's death. In the midst of our affair, her husband started to suspect that she was cheating with another man. She was afraid of his temper but she also loved you," she looked to Junmyeon. He didn't look like he wanted to hear much about his mother. Perhaps she read that on his face because she looked back to you. "Haejin thought it was best if we just went back to our normal lives. We had families we had to end it. Haejin wanted to get back home early that night but I begged her to stay a little longer. We slept together and then she left. That was the last time I saw her." She said. "They had a fight the night before she died." Junmyeon said putting pieces together. "I think he became so convinced about her affair that he tried to drag the truth out of her. It's possible she confessed to the affair or even confessed she was sleeping with a woman but if I didn't ask her to stay- if I hadn't coaxed her into staying later she might still be alive. The guilt ate away at me for three years, I was living with my own family and hers had fallen apart. I couldn't live with myself, I needed a new start so I decided to leave, I didn't tell your father because he would've chased me. I knew how much he loved me he would've fought for me but that only meant I would break his heart more in the process because I didn't love him." "So why didn't you take me?" "Because you were a reminder of the life I was trying to leave behind. You tied me to your father and I had to cut the tether to escape. But, the pain of my sins are like heavy weights forcing me to the ground." "You can't take the blame for other people's actions." you said annoyed. "Isn't that what you're doing to me? Blaming me for what your father has done." "No I'm blaming you for the choices you made. You knew dad was bipolar so you knew the risks of leaving him abruptly. You didn't love him yet everyday you pretended you did, you broke his heart. As my mother, you were responsible for protecting me and you didn't. I don't blame you for the abuse, he's the one that hit me but I do blame you for starting the chain of events that led to it. Your actions were reckless and you never once stopped to consider who you were affecting in the process you didn't care. Out of all the decisions you made, I blame you the most for not choosing me." You said. "I did choose you. I thought you were safe with your father." "You thought I was safe with the mentally ill man that you knew wasn't even responsible enough for taking his own medication. I remember that mom, you counting his pills and crushing them in his drinks. You assumed everything would be fine, you hoped it would be fine so he could assume the role that you no longer wanted. If that was the case you should've never had me in the first place.... You chose your grief over your own daughter. For ten years, I adored you as much as I adored papa, I moved in you. For nine months, your womb was my home and even that connection wasn't enough for you to pick me. What your responsible for is robbing me of a decent childhood by leaving me with a man with a mental illness. That's what I blame you for and your refusal to recognize that what you did was more destructive than how you could've handled it is what's going to keep us from ever being together. I thought papa was the only family I had left... Now it's clear to me I really have no one." You and Junmyeon stood up and you headed for the door. You reached the front only to look back and see Junmyeon handing Seol the picture of his mother. He found out a lot too which meant you both needed time to process. You and Junmyeon went back to Seoul in silence; you both held hands and leaned on each other for comfort on the train. Junmyeon saw you home even though his place was closer to the train station. You both stood at your front door in silence for a moment. Junmyeon couldn't bring himself to look at you. You gave a bitter laugh and said, "Don't tell me you're blaming me too." He looked up at you like he had come out of a daze. "What? What would I blame you for?" He asked. "For being that women's daughter. She had just as much of a hand in destroying your family as she did mine and I look like her-" He kissed you, his movement to your lips was swift, he cupped your face between his thumb and forefinger and his lips were soft against yours. When he pulled away you looked at him almost like a puppy. "I'm not your father Y/N. I'm not like him at all. There's just a lot we found out today. I need- we both need to sort through what we learned." You agreed but you partly wondered if he was already pulling away from you. You walked into the house but you noticed as soon as you unlocked the door he was already walking away. A part of you regretted asking him to come along. You thought about everything that happened though, you were just as guilty of pulling away from him as well. You two were doing this dance of getting close and pulling away. So many things from your past made it complicated to keep a proper relationship. When you were with Heechul, hiding your past and your father's abuse was easy. It was something that you had done all your life. Junmyeon was aware of everything, being this open with someone that wasn't Minseok was new. Your fear that he was with you because he knew your trauma had subsided and was replaced with the fear that he didn't want to be with you because you were your mother's daughter. He said that he wasn't anything like your father but you felt him moving space between you two. .... You were at Cheong Jin Ok, despite not having a hangover you ordered the hangover cure anyway. You spun a coin on the table while you waited. Only three days had passed since you and Junmyeon discovered so much about your mothers and it was still hard to process everything. You weren't bothered by the fact that she was in love with Haejin; what bothered you was that they had an affair. They could've just left their husbands. Though, you started to wonder how well that would've gone for Haejin. It sounded as though Junmyeon's father had exhibited abusive behavior long before he killed his mother. It made some sense, he didn't just go mad and kill her because she had an affair unless he was already the type to get dangerously aggressive. He did this when Junmyeon was seven, you wondered just how much of his father's abuse he remembered. You wondered if he ever even saw it. You were lost in your own thoughts when someone sat down in front of you. It took you a moment to realize it but you looked up to see Heechul smiling at you. For a moment, it reminded you of when you two first met. He had that glow about him, all kinds of charisma but there was a slight reminder of your father in him. The way you felt like you could never make him happy. That you were never really enough to begin with. You wondered if he ever loved you, you were...infatuated with him. Maybe it was the same for him, but what made him captivated with you? "Boo." He said with a soft smile. "Boo." "What are you doing here alone? Couldn't find a date?" Heechul was always a little too harsh. He may have meant it as a joke but it pierced through you a little. "Didn't really want one." you answered. The waiter stopped by and placed your hangover cure in front of you. The waiter asked Heechul if he was ready to order and he informed him he wasn't getting anything, much to your relief. You half expected him to try and turn this into an awkward kind of date. "You don't look like you need a hangover cure." he said. "I don't but at the same time I do." "Where's that guy that's always attached to you. Junmyeon, right?" "I don't know probably at home or hanging out with the guys.... He's not always attached to m-you think he's always attached to me?" Heechul chuckled, he rested his chin in his hand as he looked at you. "He was there everyday while you were in the hospital. Right by your bed side; he was pissed off I even showed up to see you." "You came to see me?" Your voice projected more hope and happiness than you meant it to. It was a given the Junmyeon by your side at the hospital; you figured he wanted to make sure you were safe because of everything that happened. He was the first one you saw when you woke up, he even kissed you. Heechul coming to see you in the hospital meant something to you, the feeling of not being wanted felt a little less heavier than before. That rose a question in you that you never thought to ask before, "Why did you even go out with me?" You asked. His eyebrows rose like he wanted to know where that question came from but then he sank his chin down in his hand and puffed up his cheek. You could tell he was thinking but for a moment his eyes wandered off and you wondered if he was ever going to answer your question. Normally, you wouldn't even talk to him, any one that hurt you, you kicked them out of your life. Although, your most recent revelation that you did the same thing your father did when your mother left made you realize you were following the same path. You still had your reservations when it came to Heechul but you were trying to resolve your problems not create more. Part of that resolution was facing them. "You're really cute." Heechul said. He wasn't even looking at you when he said it. He finally turned to look at you though and you just blinked at him. You could feel a blush rising up once again reminding you of when you two first met. He smiled at your look and said, "You've got big eyes and a really pretty smile. You've got this gravitational pull about you that makes it hard to not want to get close." "But you never got close." "I tried- you wouldn't let me. Minseok was your go to person and that was annoying to me because you were a different person with him, he knew secrets that as your boyfriend I think I should've known. Or at least you could've trusted me with. The more you kept me out the more frustrating it was." "Is that why you cheated?" He got quiet for a moment. Neither one of you talked about it. You never talked about your relationship the way you should've. No wonder it never worked out between you. If he hadn't hit you back, you might've forgave him, you might've gone back to him if he said he wanted you. Instead, you tried pushing everyone out. Siwon and Ryeowook were hard to push out though, when you saw Siwon again you couldn't push him away. It felt too good to know that he was really your friend. You never really seemed to lack friends in your life, you were lucky enough for that. So was it completely impossible for you to "fall in love?" "I cheated because I wasn't satisfied by you." You felt like he just threw a rock at your head. Even though you were offended by that, you did consider that the only reason you ever slept with him most times was because he wanted to have sex. "Next time just take a knife and stab me in the chest, it would hurt a lot less." You said sarcastically. He laughed, "Look, I didn't mean it to hurt your feelings but the truth is that you weren't connected with me. You were always somewhere else. It didn't even seem like you enjoyed it so I felt like I was just screwing a doll." "Geeze do you have to describe it like that?" You both laughed together and it seemed to be a good genuine moment that would lead to some healing. You still needed time but Heechul might not be so bad to hang around again. You enjoyed your time with him at the bar. As you two talked, he made some comments that annoyed you and ones that made you laugh but it reminded you a lot of the initial bliss when you two first hooked up. "Why did you come here alone anyway?" He asked suddenly. "Umm. I just kinda wandered in." You said. Heechul had followed you out of the restaurant and was walking with you down the street. "More secrets huh?" He teased. "It's the truth. I was just walking around lost in thought and my stomach started grumbling so I walked in to eat. What were you doing in there alone?" "I wasn't in there to begin with, I just saw you in there and decided to annoy you." "What's up with you guys always wanting to annoy me?" You smiled. Heechul pushed his finger into your cheek making you laugh. He claimed it was fun seeing your different expressions. He liked your eyes, your father liked them too. That's why he loved your mother, her eyes were expressive and large. He used to describe them like large black holes pulling you in against your will. It was the one advantage you had to never being alone. It didn't seem like either of you had a destination but you stayed together for the majority of the day, even as the clouds began to roll in. You forgot about what it was like dating him, this seemed like a newer experience to you, although, deep down you missed Junmyeon. His radio silence was disturbing and your trial with your father was coming up soon. "So what's up with you and that guy anyway? He ask you out yet?" Heechul asked. "Why do you want to know?" "Just wondering is all. It's obvious he's in love with you." You chuckled, "What?" "Oh I forgot it's obvious to everyone but you." You stopped in your tracks. You grabbed his hand to stop him and looked at him curiously. "Did he tell you that?" You asked. Heechul laughed, "He didn't have to it's obvious. Not to mention he hates when I come around. I have a sneaking suspicion it has more to do with the fact that I'm your ex rather than that I hit you. Which, I suppose I never apologized for." He took your hand in his and kissed the back of it before he cupped your cheek with the other hand. "I'm truly sorry for hurting you, not just physically but emotionally as well. I'm an asshole but you know this by now." He said. You burst out laughing and swatted his hand away from your cheek. "You really are an ass, but I suppose I can forgive you just this once. Just don't go taking advantage of my kindness." "As an asshole I can't promise that." You rolled your eyes but he laughed at you. You two started walking again but you brought up what he said before. "So you really believe he's in love with me?" You said. "You know if you were an anime character you'd have little sparkles in your eyes right now." "Heechul." "Yes, he likes you. He's in love with you, in an annoying capacity actually. From what I've heard you two already slept together, if that was all he wanted from you then he wouldn't have gone through all the trouble he went through " That may have been true but you wondered if he still felt the same after everything he had learned. You hadn't attempted to call him because you wanted to give him time. You thanked Heechul and gave him a hug before running off but you heard him asking you what he did to be thanked for. You headed to Minseok's place hoping to find Junmyeon there. You knocked on the door and Jongin answered. He welcomed you in. "Is Junmyeon here?" You asked. He shrugged, "I don't know I just woke up. Let's see." Jongin knocked on the Junmyeon's door with you standing behind him. Junmyeon opened the door just enough to poke his head out. He was shirtless which seemed like the norm for him when he was home and in his room. When he saw you, his eyes got wide though, "Y/N what are you doing here?" He asked. "I wanted to talk to you. Can I come in?" Junmyeon looked back in his room and then back at you making you feel like he was hiding something. You stepped up to the door, "Junmyeon is someone in the room with you," "Uh-" You put your hand on the door and looked at him. You heard a snicker from behind the door and adrenaline rushed through you. You looked at Junmyeon hoping he'd tell you the truth but you doubted it. "Listen, it's really not what you think." "Then open the door. Show me it's not what I think." He looked almost hopeless and he sighed defeated. He let his hand down so he could stop guarding the door. He opened it more for you to see Seohyun sitting on his bed. You stepped in looking at her disappointed. Was heartbreak all you'd ever know in this world? Was nothing kind to you? You looked to Junmyeon with tears brimming, "Then what is this, Junmyeon?" "We were just talking." He said "In your room, with the door shut and no shirt on? She's your ex isn't she?" "Calm down Y/N-" You raised your hand to stop Seohyun from talking. You were locking eyes with Junmyeon even as you said to her, "I wasn't talking to you." Junmyeon looked down at his feet. Was he playing you all this time? A thousand different things ran in your head but the first thing that came out of your mouth was, "Did you sleep with her?" He looked guilty which made you feel like throwing up. You hurried out of the house, Junmyeon called after you. You felt the first soft drops of rain coming down, rain you weren't expecting even though the soft gray clouds had taken over the sun. You heard Junmyeon calling after you and you hurried, running down the street but he was faster. He caught onto your arm and turned you around so you could look at him. The rain was pouring now, it picked up so quickly, you both were drenched, hair sticking to your faces. "Let me go!" you yelled. "Y/N listen to me." "No!" You cried. You banged your fist on his chest crying, "I hate you. Why did you make me believe you cared about me? Why did you do this?" "I do care about you. Y/n I got drunk last night. I don't even remember how I got home let alone if me and Segun slept together." "Why did you get drunk? Why did you look so guilty?" "Because I knew how it looked. I don't know if me and Seohyun did anything and to be honest I highly doubt we did. I got drunk because I couldn't process all of this information about my mother-" "You do hate me for looking like that woman don't you?" You tried to pull away from him but his grip was firm on your shoulders. He cupped your face, "Y/N I don't hate you. None of what happened was your fault. You're not your mother I know that." "But I look like her, that's all you'll ever see. The woman that destroyed your family." You looked him in the eyes. Your vision blurred a little and you tried to wipe your eyes clear. You felt like someone was ripping your heart out. "Y/N, I'm in love with you." Junmyeon confessed. "How can you mean that? How am I supposed to believe you, when ever I get vulnerable around you, anytime I'm ready to take a risk she shows up. " "You're the only one I want." "How do you know?" He crashed his lips onto yours kissing you hard and feverishly. Your lips molded with his as he deepened the kiss so much it was like he was trying to become one with you. His hands came to your neck then your waist pulling you into his body so that the idea of space didn't even exist. The taste of his lips, the fever of his kiss, he burned himself into your flesh and awakened a Phoenix fire like never before. Your heart jumped, skipped and leapt. It fluttered and wailed and every tear you cried out of sadness became happier. Happier than you had ever been before. "I don't want to live without you." He said against your lips. You looked him in the eyes. His thumbs wiped away tears. His white shirt was soaking and sticking to him showing the lines of his chest and abs. Your hands touched his chest, they memorized the muscles as if it would be the last time you'd ever touch them. "Then stay with me. Don't see her, don't let her near you." You begged. He kissed you once more, softly, letting his lips linger on yours. His tongue slow waltzing in your mouth. He breathed you in, and despite how cold the rain was making you, the heat of his kiss kept you warm on the inside. "Do you love me?" He asked. His eyes were half closed, he kept your face close to his, his hands still cradling your face. You looked at him with dewy eyes, and smiled. "I do... I'm in love with you, I always have been." He was overcome with happiness and scooped you up in one more deep kiss. You broke it to pull away and took his hand. You ran with him to your apartment, pouring rain and all.... Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw
Trauma Ch.13
Who: Reader x Kim Junmyeon What: Angst, Romance, Smut Story: You're just two trauma filled people trying to live normal lives... but trauma is a bitch Y/N's POV You and Junmyeon walked out of your communications class excited about the grade you received. You were also notified that you two got the highest grade in the class. The professor said, he found that you two could work well with each other and provided a good amount of information and a strong argument in both your written paper and your presentation. You felt like you were walking on a cloud you were so happy. You were laughing with Junmyeon as you stepped out of class and said, "I can't wait to show pa-" you stopped yourself. Whenever you got a really good grade you were excited to show it to your father. You could hear him in your head telling you how great of a daughter you were and that you were only going to make him proud so long as you kept up that effort. No matter how often the bad moments, there were good ones with your father and you were happiest when you felt he was proud of you. Still, your father's last words to you came to your mind as you thought about the fact that he couldn't separate you from your mother in his mind. In truth, he didn't love you enough. That hurt you to the core and you did everything you could to ignore that pain and shield yourself from it. Junmyeon was able to pick up on something being wrong with you. Minseok confirmed it as well when he asked you if you were alright some times. They had a more compassionate concern for you than just checking to make sure you were doing well. You thought you were hiding it well enough but with that recent slip up, Junmyeon had caught you red handed in how you were feeling. He stopped you by grabbing your hand and getting you to turn and face him. "What's going on inside that head of yours?" He asked. "Nothing." Junmyeon had a grin like his old sarcastic remarks were going to come back but he didn't say anything. He hugged you instead and asked you if you regretted seeing your father while he was being held. As far as you were aware, he finally took your offer but he kept away from you. It was for the best but deep down you never truly wanted to push your father out of your life. In the end, it was him who pushed himself out. You couldn't make excuses for him anymore. "So much has happened in such a short amount of time. From dating you, to finding out where my mother had been all this time and my father trying to kill me and going to jail then telling me he doesn't love me. So much to ruin my life has happened, sometimes I just- I just wish it was the way it used to be." You confessed. "I get it, it's hard to accept what you father said to you. Still, you can move on with your life without worrying about being abused. Isn't that a good thing?" "It is." Your eyes shifted to a corner of the room. That was enough to make Junmyeon ask if you were sure about what you said. You didn't know how to explain how you felt especially after you had already declared that they were your family, the guys and Junmyeon. You loved Junmyeon so much, even as you looked at him again you couldn't help but smile. Someone actually understood your pain, he understood you. He loved you, for once someone had chosen you. "I've just lived so long thinking my father chose me. I always believed he loved me so to hear him say what he said- it was like hearing my mother confess that she chose her own pain over me.... It feels like some strong force is pushing their weight down on my heart, like its trying to test how much pain I can take. I guess deep down I'm always wondering if this blissful happiness is going to be taken away." "Is that why you were so hesitant on telling me how you felt?" You nodded. "I was afraid that if I admitted how I felt about you than you would break my heart. I just felt like it was inevitable and I didn't think I could take anymore of that kind of pain. It feels like I'm one step away from breaking sometimes." He kissed you gently, swiping your lips up in a divine caress. His hand sweetly lifting your chin so he could get a better angle. You felt his smile on your lips and your own smile grew. When he pulled away, you looked him in the eyes with a brilliant smile. He chuckled and cupped your face with both his hands. "You're too cute." He revelled. You laughed, "Thank you!" "I love you. If you break, I'll put you back together but before that happens I'm going to do everything in my power to keep you from falling apart. If I fail to protect you, you at least know Minseok has your back." You laughed, "That's true." "I just want you to know, even if your parents didn't chose you. I love you. I chose you." Your grin grew even larger and you placed your hands on his chest playfully. "I know and I'm so happy you did!" He laughed and you two walked down the hallway together before you had to split up. Junmyeon had work after class and you wanted to study for an up coming test for your late night class. You were on your way to the library when Seohyun saw you and stepped up to you. She looked like she detested you even more now than she did before. She didn't seem like the type that was so in love with Junmyeon to begin with. To you, she was more like a woman that wanted to make a conquest and couldn't stand her efforts being thwarted. You had tried not to think about the night Junmyeon got drunk. You didn't want to drive yourself crazy with the possibility of what may have happened. Besides, Junmyeon said so himself that he chose you. He loved you so there was nothing Seohyun could say or do that would break you two up...you hoped. "Look at the little princess, walking around as if she were blessing the commoners with her presence." She mocked. "You're the only one in all of Uni that believes any of that Seohyun." "Are you sure about that? Minseok seems to believe you're so innocent," she reached out to flick a piece of your hair like it was a nasty bug, " you're nothing but a leech." "I think between the two of us you're the real blood sucker." She gave you a nasty grin but she clearly didn't like the fact that you weren't very moved by her insults. She hated you more than you thought possible for any one person to hate a human being. You wondered if this really had anything to do with Junmyeon. It couldn't be just because he chose her could it? Seohyun walked up closer to her, her long legs gave her a slight height advantage over you and perhaps she got close in hopes of intimidating you but you dealt with your father who was far more scary when he was having a manic episode. Compared to him, Seohyun was the littlest fish in the pond. She turned her nose up to you and spoke down at you as she said, "You remind me of the story of the fox king. You know how he tricked the tiger into walking behind him and making all the other animals scared. The tiger believed the fox was really King but I was all a farce," she leaned closer to you and said, "But he was just a lying little weakling. You think just because you've got a crew behind you that you're untouchable but I'll show you who the real royal is here. Get ready to watch your little happy kingdom fall apart princess." She had this large evil grin like she just knew this threat would get to you. You looked her straight in the eyes and said, "Okay." You walked past her but stopped and turned to her after a few steps, "By the way, if I really am the fox and you're the tiger in that analogy, doesn't that mean I'm still smarter than you?" You chuckled when you saw her eye twitch and her hands ball into fists. You made your way to the library to study and after you took your test in class later on that evening you stopped by starbucks to get a coffee. You sat down in the store so you could catch up on some news on your phone. You had actually texted Junmyeon to see if he wanted to come over to your place later on that night when he got off of work. While you were waiting for an answer and immersed in news stories, someone had seen you in the store and walked over to your table. "Mind if I join you?" A woman's voice came from the front of the table. You looked up from your phone in shock, "Seol?" She gave a weak smile but she looked better now than she did when you and Junmyeon met her again. "Can I have a seat?" She asked. You sighed, "Well it's public seating I don't see why not." She pulled out the chair in front of you and she sat down. You two stared at each other in awkwardness. You were wondering what she was doing here. Her hair was up in a ponytail except for a few strands in the front that framed her face. She wore a lavender turtleneck sweater and a tan velvet pencil skirt. She looked girlish even though her face showed signs of aging. She pulled the loose strand behind her ear and chuckled nervously, "I should've taken better care of myself, maybe I'd look better than this." You stayed silent, you didn't really know what to say. Your phone buzzed on the table letting you know that you had recieved a text message, probably from Junmyeon. You stayed staring at her. "Aren't you going to answer that?" She asked. "It's a text message, the message will still be there." She nodded but looked disappointed in your demeanor towards her. Your heart hurt sitting in front her like this. You never wanted to be on opposite ends of your mother. You wanted her to love you and hug you. As a child, you always imagined what it would be like if she came back home, you hoped that she would embrace you and tell you that she had to go away for some crazy important reason. Since you were a child, you might've accepted any feeble reason as to why she disappeared. You were still having problems with accepting the real reason why she left you and your father. "Let me first apologize. Everything I did to you and your father wasn't just unfair it was selfish. You were right, I had a responsibility as your mother despite losing Haejin. I should've at least chosen you and I didn't. I regret every moment I spent away from you especially to find out what your father did to you while I was gone." She said. "Well it's great that you know and understand that but what are you doing here?" "I want a chance. You said that as long as I didn't recognize my mistakes that we would never be a family again-" "So what you just think showing up in Seoul and apologizing is going to make everything better?" "No." "I still can't wrap my head around the reason you left. " "I know Y/N please just hear me out." She begged. You calmed yourself with a soft sigh and leaned back in your chair to look at her. You two really did look alike she was just older, more worn and you wondered if holding on to your own bitterness would result in you looking the same. Where you really staring at the reflection of your future self or could everything change? Your father wanted nothing to do with you anymore but your mother wanted to repair the broken bridge. Your heart was reluctant, it was scared of extending the olive branch. At anytime, your whole world could fall down. Seohyun didn't even have to lift a finger, all she'd have to do was wait and watch....Or.... you could give your mother a chance. The chance you had always hoped for and let her work her way back in. "Fine." You said. "I don't know what I have to do for you to let me back into your life but I want to try. Not because you guilt tripped me or to clear my conscious but because you are my daughter. I want you to have family." "I do have family. Minseok and Jongin, Eunha, Junmyeon and my other friends. They're my family." "They're not your blood." "Yeah well that wasn't enough last time was it?" You snapped her. You sighed to calm down again. You were trying but you were angry. She hung her head, she knew you were pissed and she knew you had every right to be. She was at least trying though. You were trying to reason in your head to give her a chance but you were scared. When you were intent on finding her to get answers for why she left, there was a small slither of hope that her excuse would be good enough so that you two could work on building a relationship. She was the only blood relative that you had left. "I brought this for you." She said. She pulled out a small locket in the shape of a seashell. It was gold and well kept but you remembered it from when you were a kid. That one time you accompanied Haejin and your mother out on the town. You couldn't remember how you got it but you remembered your mom showing you how to put the pictures inside the locket. She had placed it on the table and you reached out to grab it. You opened it to see your baby picture on one side and your mother on the other side. You were supposed to have matching lockets but your father threw yours away. "You took this with you when you left?" You asked. "I did." "But you said that taking me would remind you of everything you left. Why would you take this with you?" "Because despite everything- I did love you very much and while taking you with me would've been a reminder of the life I was trying to leave behind- you were still my daughter. It was my only way of keeping a piece of you without placing you in the middle of a war with your father and me." She said. You looked up at her trying not to cry. You felt like her taking the locket with her meant something. She still left you but she didn't completely forsake you as her daughter. The necklace meant there was hope, at least to you, there was something that could be built. "I- I need some time but-," Your phone buzzed and you were about to ignore it when you realized it was a phone call instead of a text this time. The number wasn't familiar. You usually didn't answer unknown numbers but it had caught your attention anyway. You picked it up to answer it and said, "Hello?" "Ms. Jeon?" "This is her?" "This is officer Yong with Seoul City police department, we need you to come down to the station as soon as possible." He said "The police station? Why?" "I believe the matter is something that should be discussed in person. Please get here immediately." "Al-alright. I'm on my way." You hung up the phone and stood up. You gathered your things but your mother stood up with you worried. "Is everything alright?" "I'm not sure. They want me down at the police station." You said. "I'll go with you." You didn't even refuse. You hurried to the police station by cab with your mother. You met Officer Yong who led you down to the morgue and asked you to identify a body for them just as a formality. He told you that their parole officer went to go see Inho at his home for their first meeting. He never showed up to the meeting so they made a house call but when they got in the house they found him dead. You didn't believe your father would do such a thing. There was no way your father would kill himself but when you got down to the morgue to confirm the body you broke down in heavy tears. You tried to run over to the table he laid on. "No! Papa!" You screamed. Your mother grabbed a hold of you. Officer Yong tried to have the coroner cover the body. He tried to help your mother take you back to the main hall. You dropped to your knees in tears. Your body was shaking, "How- did this happen?" You cried. "There were cuts to his wrist but we haven't found a suicide note." The officer said. "My ex husband was bipolar, he experienced manic episodes it's possible he didn't take his medication." You shook your head, "That doesn't make sense. Papa had manic episodes before, some where he was depressed but he never hurt himself." "I don't mean to speak out of turn but wasn't he recently charged with aggravated assault against you?" Officer Yong said "So you're saying he aggravated assaulted himself?" You shot back. Your mother patted your back and offered you another tissue before she looked back at the officer. He sighed and asked you if you knew of anyone that might want to hurt him but you didn't know of anyone your father knew outside of work. His coworkers preferred to keep away from him because of his attitude. It was looking like suicide was the only real option but it peaked the police's curiosity that he didn't leave a note. "Not everyone leaves a note to be quite honest and it's up to the coroner to determine whether or not the wounds on him were truly self inflicted." "Why did you call me here? If you already considered it to be suicide why bring me here to see that?" You cried. Officer Yong looked away with shameful eyes and your mother picked up on it. "Was my daughter a suspect?" She asked. You looked at her confused for a moment and then saw her stand up to ask Officer Yong the question again. You looked at the officer not even realizing that might've been a possibility. Officer Yong sighed and said, "I told you it was just a formality. We have to check." "Check to see if I staged my own father's suicide?" "You're the only one we could pin point that had a motive. After all, he assaulted you and had you in the hospital in a coma for three days." "He's still my father! I was the one to offer him the deal so he didn't go to jail. I dropped the charges for him. I never wanted him to die." You said. You couldn't get any angrier, you were only hurt. Officer Yong apologized but he had to ask you for an alibi. Thankfully you were with the boys around the time of death so anyone of them could've confirmed your whereabouts. While you were lucky enough to have someone confirm where you were, you were also angry. Why would your father suddenly take his life? It couldn't have been because he believed he didn't have anyone else. He had purposely kicked you out of his life. Why did he do this? You went home without your mother and crawled into bed. You tried to make yourself disappear into the sheets. You wanted to stay there and never leave. There was a knock on the door that you had ignored until you heard Junmyeon's voice from the other side. You didn't feel like moving to open it up for him though. You just texted him where the spare key was. You heard Lady meowing at him as he entered your bedroom. "Y/n? What's going on? Are you playing a game?" He asked. You felt the bed sink from his weight and he pulled the covers from off your head. You couldn't even look at him but he could tell from your look something was wrong. "What's wrong? Don't tell me your father came back to harrass you?" "My father's dead." You said weakly. "What?" "He killed himself." Junmyeon looked at you shocked and quite disturbed as well. A single tear floated from one eye and across the bridge of your nose. Junmyeon let out a pained sound. He sank down so he could see your face, "I'm sorry." He said. "I'm not meant to be happy am I?" "Why say that?" "Anytime I feel like I'm top of the world...something happens that has me crashing down. I don't want this anymore." "Want what exactly? " You heart panged so hard it felt like someone took a hammer to it. You felt like someone had crushed your spirit and was stealing your life force from you. You felt like you couldn't breathe. "I don't want this pain." "Then give it to me. Give me everything you have, I'll do what ever I can to take it away." You tried not to cry but the tears came down even more. Junmyeon wrapped his arms around you and you moved so close to him you could've sank into his body. You shook your head, "Everyone wants to protect me but it doesn't work. Seohyun might be right, I am just a weakling. I'm sick of all this trauma in my life." "Seohyun is a sadistic bitch that is only interested in hurting people for her own sake. She's wrong about you, there's nothing weak about you." Junmyeon argued. You stared into space as you laid there. Junmyeon wanted to help you, you knew he did but you weren't sure he could. Seohyun was right, your happiness was crashing down around you..... "Wait a minute." You blinked. You sat up as you thought about what Seohyun said to you at Uni. Was that a coincidence or was she telling you exactly what she had done? "That bitch." You whispered. "What? What did you just realize?" Junmyeon asked. You threw the covers off of you and jumped out of bed. You got your shoes back on and stormed out of the house. You asked him for Seohyun's address. He was hesitant on giving it to you but you were determined to get it from him no matter what. He could tell you were angry. He gave you the address and you took a cab all the way to her place. The butler answered the door when you two got there and you burst into the house walking right past him looking for Seohyun. "Song Seohyun get your ass down here and face me right now!" You yelled in the foyer. Junmyeon came to your side, "Y/N what's going on, what are we doing here?" Seohyun came downstairs, hair brushed over her shoulder wearing a red dress with a slit up the side and her shoulders exposed. She looked like she was ready to enjoy either a nice evening with a date or go to the club to choose her next victim. That smug smile on her face made you furious. Your hands balled into fists and as she descended to your level you said, "You did it didn't you? You're the reason my father killed himself." She chuckled, "Oh that poor fool went and did that to himself? He's as weak as you, maybe even more so. All because your mother had an affair with a woman." She chuckled even as your nails dug into your palms. Adrenaline pumped through you and red flashed past your eyes. Her smile needed to be erased. You felt a dangerous kind of anger towards her. The kind of anger that made a person kill. You tried to hold it back. Junmyeon grabbed your shoulder trying to calm you. "You're sick. You did all of this for what?" you seethed "Well I wouldn't have found it necessary if your little friend didn't have all my pictures erased. I told you I was going to take down your little kingdom princess. You're nothing. You think you're a smart little fox because you have Minseok behind you? Without any of them- you're just a pathetic little girl who's mommy didn't love her enough to stay." There was nothing holding you back anymore. You snapped and punched her across her jaw. She hit the floor with a hard thud, her hand went to her face and tears stung her eyes. She tried to exercise her jaw to release the pain. The butler threatened to call the police and you were close to telling him to do so. "What do you know about ANY of this! How could you even know about that affair?" You growled. She looked up at you with piercing hate in her eyes. She tried to grin again but it proved to be a little too painful for her. Her eyes shifted from you to Junmyeon as she said, "How do you think?" You looked back at Junmyeon in a painful shock. Junmyeon looked from Seohyun to you. He looked just as shocked as you. "You told her?" You asked. "The night he got drunk to be exact." She added salt in the wound. You turned back to her and snapped, "You say one more word and I swear to you the next punch I land will break your jaw." "You need to leave." The butler said. "No don't let her go, call the cops instead." She said standing up. You were about to hit her again and the butler was about to go make the call when a voice at the top of the stairs said, "There's no need." Everyone looked up and an older man descended the stairs. Seohyun called out to him, her father it seemed. He was cold towards her while she was trying to get comfort from him. He was staring you in the eyes, one hand in his pocket and the scar on the right corner of his lip made him look even more shady than you were sure he already was. "My daughter's actions towards you will be thoroughly punished I assure you. You've done enough in my home however, I'll have to ask you to leave." He said. "But Appa-" "You will not say another word!" He yelled at her, she jumped, startled that her father spoke to her so aggressively, "You've done enough damage already. Now please-- show yourselves out." Mr. Song turned away from you and grabbed Seohyun by the back of her neck practically dragging her into another room. It briefly reminded you of how your father would sometimes reprimand you. Junmyeon stepped up and touched your shoulder begging you to leave, you swatted his hand away, "DON'T you touch me." You stalked out of the Song home, Junmyeon following behind you pleading with you to listen to him. You were hurt, the one person you loved betrayed you. You had a slight hope that your father might one day see you as his daughter again but that possibility had been erased by the carelessness of Junmyeon's drunken lips and Seohyun's vindictive heart. Your mother wanted to form a relationship with you and even if that was something worth looking forward to, no matter how many times you tried to grab onto happiness it always seemed like your life was hitting you hard with blunt force trauma... Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw KISS Squad @BabydollBre, @QueenyCrossGene, and @BTSMicDrop Lip glosses @EXOahjummafan @Starbell808 @QueenPandaBunny @divanicola05 @MelindaL @MelissaGarza