✴wedding day (Side B) my side of things✴
On the ride home I waited for a call, a message, an answers...something that could let me know she was okay.
Unfortunately that wasn't the case. I received nothing, not even a single "I Love You" text.
My initial 'what if..' thoughts filling my insides. The thought of her knowing shattered my heart. I had no escape, No way out of it. How could I possibly face her without recalling...what I did.
Do I even deserve to have her as my wife?. Maybe not, but I'm too selfish to say otherwise.
All the negative thoughts consume me, as I contemplated the night sky. Dark blue skies and cold winds, I kept those feelings to myself . With too much to bring up, I waited for her to say something.
Sana stayed quiet for most of the ride. "Will you be alright... I could stay, if you'd like me to?" She asked before we reached the driveway to my house.
Although it was kind of her to offer, I wanted and needed some time alone before my big day.
"No. Could you just park here for a few minutes"
I couldn't put into words how much it meant to me, that once again she's my shoulder to cry on and vent to after not seeing each other for two years.
"Sana, is there anything I can do to make this go away?"
My voice evidently giving away the pain I was in at the moment.
She took a second before answering. Making me feel like I could end up alone and unloved by the only one I gave my heart to.
Her silence spoke volumes.
"Yoongi...tell her how much you love her. This could be the last chance you'll get to do so. Make it count, make her remember. Make it so she looks back at it and feels showered with love"
I sighed, she knew the type of person I was. This wasn't going to be easy.
"Things Will turn out okay, just do your part" carefully patting me on the head like a teacher would to a student.
Confess to her...to Y/N. Ugh.. What is this a K- drama?.
"Confess before it's too late" she added before leaving. Its almost like she could read my mind.
I woke up in the middle of the night. Sana's last words manifesting in the form of nightmares, that kept me up.
I sat up on my bed, staring at the grey wall in front of me.
Having to pour out my emotions on paper screamed out. 'cliche. How could I?. I didn't know where to begin. Regardless I shoved the bed sheet aside as I got up from bed.
I walked to the kitchen. Opening a cabinet where I kept all my cups, I grabbed the last clean glass and poured myself a glass of water. Cold but refreshing, helping me cool off from the uncomfortable heat my body produced.
I placed the glass on the table, next to the paper and pen I had left there from earlier.
The minutes felt eternal, and the hours agonizing. Until I began to dig deep beyond the surface of my own feelings.
I went from having nothing to say, to writing page after page, without holding back. Each word written with love in mind.
A one of a kind ray of sunshine, that's who Y/N was and still is. No one could compare, even if they tried. Effortlessly winning my heart in an instant. After being presented to multitude of potential brides, she stood out among them.
By the time I was done writing, It was six o'clock. I didn't realize I had stayed up all night. My phone flooding with messages alarmed me.
Too scared to even look I left it as it was. Those messages could wait, but my wedding no. Getting up from the chair I stretched, then left to shower, I had to get rid of the smell of sweat and cologne on my body .
Just a few minutes before the wedding, I gave myself a last look in the mirror fixing my tie and hair. A drastic change from the blonde I was used to.
Fifteen minutes Mr. Min, the wedding planner called from outside the room. Taking in a deep breath I took out my peace of paper with my confession written all over.
Something felt out of place, expecting to see more I prepared myself. Sana should've been here, but she was nowhere to be seen. 'Where's the emotional support when you need some...'
The classical organ piece began to play, indication she would be walking in at any minute.
I stood there with hands behind my back, both holding on to the mic.
'Was it a dream?'... No, not at all. This was Y/N, the future Mr. Min, the future mother to my rebellious child. Walking in to the pace of the melody.
Her beauty transcendent making a Jaw dropping entrance. After we haven't spoken for a day or two my heart raced eager to run to her.
Now here we were face to face.
The deacon spoke, once he was done he pointed at me. Ready to exchange vows. All eyes on us.
I held on to the mic ready to pour all my feelings out into the open.
I felt confident, but the look she gave me made me feel nervous. 'Was she aware of it all or was it the nervous jitters' I thought before I gathered up my thoughts to say my vow.
"Y/N, I can't help falling in love with you all over as each day passes. I know we've only known each other for a short time but that didn't stop me from deciding to take our relationship a step further. Y/N believe it or not you've changed me, many females might claim to have me but my heart belongs only to one and that is you. When I was feeling down you were there to comfort me. When I was sad you were my shoulder to cry on. When I was tired you were there bringing me joy making me laugh and smile uncontrollably. I know deep down I don't deserve you but if you give me a Chance I'll become the man you rightfully deserve, and treat you like the princess you are"
Feeling at ease I smiled at her. With the 'awwww filling up the church. I looked at everyone, shying away from the spotlight.
I turned to face Y/N, admiring her natural beauty. She looked broken, shattered from the inside. I wasn't sure whether I should hand her the mic or not.
She bit her lips, hesitating whether to grab the mic from my hands or not. Finally she took it, giving me a forced smile. 'Did she think I wouldn't notice?'.
After a few seconds of nothing but silence, it was evident something was wrong and I didn't know what.
'Say something...anything, please Y/N' mentally begging for her to break the silence.
Unable to move from where I stood, giving a quick glance as she attempted to speak.
'....please' I begged one last time.
Without a warning, she let go of the mic. The piercing sound of the drop resonating thought the church made everyone cover their ears. Picking up her dress. she ran out of my sight, and out the church doors. Leaving everyone including me with mouths dropped to the ground. Leaving me standing at the altar. No.
It wasn't supposed to turn out like this. My vision was becoming foggy from the tears trying to come out.
It took a fraction of a second for reality to sink in. On impulse, I ran after her. I wasn't ready to lose her, not this way nor any other for that matter..
If she knew, I'll do everything in my power to get my side of that mess straighten out. To be forgiven, I'll do it all...because I love her.
"Y/N!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I tried to catch up to her. "Y/N !" I screamed again as I got ready to run cross that road after her but at the very second i stepped on that side of the pavement.
I was forced to stop in my tracks, almost falling into the traffic. A multitude of cars passed one after another, blinding me from the view I had on Y/N. "Shit!" I cursed, pounding on the button to turn on the red light and stop the road of ahead up the traffic.
It was to no use. The traffic cleared up, but Y/N was no longer there in plain sight. There was no one.
My heart felt numb, as if it's been stumped over and over.