Chief Keef Promises His Bang 3 Mixtape Will Raise Chicago's Murder Rate
Chief Keef clearly wasn't satisfied when the FBI declared during September that his hometown, Chicago, had taken the crown for the city with the most murders in the United States (during 2012). Keef-being a stats wonk no doubt-realized that the high total meant nothing in relation to Chicago's overall population, the third highest in the nation. No, what he really wanted was the highest murder rate per capita, meaning the most murders-per-person in the population. And hence he began work on his mixtape Bang 3.
Keef took to social media to inform the world that his new release would literally raise the murder rates. Again.
"Bang 2 And Almighty So On ITunes Right Now But Bang 3 No Lie Y'all Really Don't know How crazy Im goin #ImFinnaRaiseTheMurderRateUp," he announced via Instagram. "If I'm Lien I Can Get Killed right Now this S--t Is So f----n hardcore #ThatOldSosa #bang3 N----s Better Be Scared."
Translation: You can download Bang 2 right now, but Bang 3 is going to be the Manhattan Project of rap.
How Keef plans on implementing is anybody's guess, but his expertise in clinical psychology and black-ops is well-documented*. We can only assume that woven into the subtext of the bars on Bang 3 will be subliminal messages urging the listener to go out and kill. Keef didn't address how the tape will raise the murder rates only in Chicago versus any other city, but still. Listen at your own risk.
In case you were wondering: Chicago tallied 506 murders during 2012, according to the Chicago Police Department, and has seen 373 so far during 2013. That's more than Kabul, but less than Juarez. At least until Chief Keef has his say.
* = This has never been documented.
What a stupid thing to be aiming for. I guess Chief Keef isn't exactly the bastion of academic achievement though. Either way, I'll be downloading this mixtape immediately and rocking out to it while I don't kill people