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Fighter Ch.1

Who: Woo wonjae x Reader
What: Crime and romance
Story: I used to catch the bad guys now they bet money on me in fights.

I was at the gym punching away my frustrations and last night's donuts. A fire storm of fists pounded into the punching bag while my body began to sweat like I had run four miles. The taste of salt met my tongue when I licked the side of my lip. There was a rap song playing in my ears from my phone and my punches landed in time with each beat. This was always my routine, go to the gym and train my ass off until it was time to go to the underground fights.

After my brother's murder, I handed in my badge. Minsik, my former partner, didn't think I'd stay away. Being a cop was as natural to me as breathing yet for two years, I had nothing to do with cops. Now I made my money in underground fights and the man who bet on me always expected me to win.

I was beating the punching bag to a pulp, so much so the chain that held it rattled against the metal bar. The bag was shifting backwards making me move towards it. I was attacking it with fists of fury but adrenaline for tonight's fight was coursing through my veins. I panted as I gave it my all. Before I knew it, the song in my ear had long ended and another one was playing. I kept moving, I used my legs to beat up the punching bag as well.

My father always prided himself in knowing that his little girl could fight anyone; however, his vision for me went beyond that of a cop. In reality, he never expected my choices in life to lead me to becoming a cop. In fact, where my life ended up now is probably the way he pictured it to begin.

The last case I was on revolved around my father's involvement with drug trafficking into Korean ports. It seemed to make sense why he was alway leaving for business trips when I was a kid but I never knew what he did for a living. After I realized he was involved with drug trafficking, me and my partner started investigating him but we never found solid evidence that proved he had anything to do with the case we were working on. Any evidence we did find apparently went missing, clearly an inside job. My brother was different, he was strong like me but he was mostly into the science aspect of crimes. He did more than take pictures at the crime scene he looked for chemicals and put pieces of the puzzle together for me.

Our father never expressed that he wanted me or my brother to be in the drug trafficking business, he never once said anything about expecting me to do anything illegal. He had high expectations for us, he wanted us to be smart like business people but strong like soldiers. Perhaps he thought he was secretly preparing us for this life but both of us had gone in the opposite direction. He wanted us to make money but instead we cared more about helping others than our cash flow. My father expressed his disappointment in both of us because we became involved in the police department and decided to stay away. He made his efforts to come around every so often almost like he didn't want me and my brother to forget where we had come from.

We were never spoiled but our parents had money beyond our comprehension. Deep down I always suspected he was hiding something. That might've been the reason my mother left him, although she had never told me that. I always knew there was something she found out about him that made her file for divorce. She refused to talk bad about him, in fact if she could avoid talking about him at all she would. When I asked why they were getting divorced, she told me they were living two separate lives despite living in the same home. He wouldn't change for her and she made it abundantly clear she wouldn't change for him.

My brother's mother died years before I was born, before our father ever met my mother. My brother told me she was hit by a stray bullet during a shoot out with the police and some street thugs. One of the guys got away, which might've prompted my brother's pursuit into forensics. I was in middle school when he told me: it's the police's job to catch the bad guy but without forensics, the police couldn't hold them and even more when it came to the court system, if there wasn't enough hard evidence the bad guy would walk free. His mother was in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was bad luck and without the murder weapon, a way to track the gun or even the killer themselves his mother's killer walked away free. Even though his mother's death caused him grief he would always tell me some of his fondest memories of her. The way her brown hair flowed in the wind and how the sweet scent of her floral shampoo filled the air. He looked forward to her special meals on holidays and she always made twisted donuts for him. She used to sing him to sleep at night and he would recall hearing our father complain to her for treating him like he was still a baby.

My brother told me that even though he liked my mother, there were times where she seemed weak against our father. I didn't want to agree but I knew that was the truth. He remembered his mother snapping back at our father like a fire cracker. They didn't argue alot but his mother knew how to handle our father. She knew how to get her way. It was because of that submissive behavior my mother displayed that I wanted to be different. I didn't want to be easily manipulated. I wanted to make sure that everyone knew I was tougher than nails and I was not to be fucked with. That passion grew into, not just wanting to protect myself, but to protect others. So, I eventually worked my way up to becoming a detective, where I had real encounters with very bad guys. That adrenaline rush fueled me with every case that involved fighting, chasing or a shoot out. My job wasn't just fun it was thrilling, almost like I had every reason in the world to live.

Memories of my brother tend to flood into my mind when I fight. It was almost like I could taste blood, I got so angry. It fueled me more when I fought in the ring just as it fueled me when I practiced.

My fists continued beating into the punching bag like I had every intent on destroying it.

"Doesn't that hurt your fists?"

A voice from behind me came. I heard it when the song had stopped and I looked back to see Minsik standing behind me. He was in his own work out attire. Yellow gym shorts with a black tank top. He still had his nose ring in, I used to threaten to rip it out of his nose when he annoyed me. We had-- a lot to work through, a lot that I didn't want to work through. There were still something's I couldn't forgive....

I didn't want to forgive.

I was panting from all the energy I exerted. I snatched out my ear buds and hit the pause button on my music. I just started packing up my things and Minsik said,

"Y/N it's been two years, you're just going to keep ignoring me?"

I shot him a glare as I unwrapped my hands of the fighters tape. I had sucked in one of my cheeks and at the same time my jaw was clenching. There was so much hurt that built up when I saw him, but it wasn't just the pain that overwhelmed me, it was the anger too. For what he did and for what he didn't do.

"I have nothing left to say to you." I said.

"Well I have something to say to you."

I had already put my phone and towel in my gym bag. I stood up and swung it over my shoulder,

"I don't care what you have to say. " I said.

I walked past him but he continued,

"It has to do with your father. "

That stopped me right in my tracks. I turned around to look at him. The last case I had, my father got away with everything, we couldn't touch him and he took that opportunity to leave. He was lucky he did because my state of mind at the time would've made me kill him. I figured I'd never see him again and my brother's death had drained me too much to even try and look for him. It was only a few months after he had past that I found the underground club, Nova, where mafia members bet on fighters. I had no business fighting there but I became addicted to it. It was my only way to deal with my loss, or maybe my only way to ignore it. The fact that Minsik was talking about my father made my blood boil. My hands even started to tremble at the anticipation of what Minsik had to say. If he was back, I was going to kill him.

"What about my father?"

There was acid in my tone, it was directed to the person that wasn't even here. The man that got away and was the reason my brother was dead but for now, Minsik would have to do.

"He may be back in town." Minsik said.

There was a very serious look on his young face. His jaw was tight which meant he was stressed out about the possibility of my father being back as well. Then I did something that made his eyebrows furrow in confusion and his face twist up...

I smiled.

"Good," I said. I turned and started to head for the door. "Now I can finish what he started."

Minsik knew better than to just think nothing of that response. He knew it wasn't just the pain talking. It was a true threat. A goal. Which was why he chased me out of the gym trying to talk to me.

"Hold on, I didn't tell you this so you could start trouble with the guy. I told you because you deserve to know. We have to get evidence that your father was connected to all of the drug trafficking that was happening a few years ago. You can't do anything."

I chuckled and turned to him as I reached my car.

"I don't need to find my father, Minsik. More than likely, he's going to come find me and if he gets close enough, he's going to feel my blade right across his throat. That's not a threat, it's a promise."

"Then I'll have to arrest you Y/N and you know that. Don't make me do it. Just steer clear of him, don't let him drag you down."

He was pleading with me because he still cared about me and as much as I knew that, I really didn't care. I was still mad at him, at everyone for what happened two years ago. I was still hurt by his actions and lack there of. I felt like I couldn't trust him anymore. His pleading didn't mean a thing to me. I stopped wishing for them to a long time ago.

"Please Y/N. Don't destroy your life."

I looked away for a moment as if contemplating my next possible actions. But then, I looked back up at him and said,

"It's already destroyed."

I hopped in my car and left without another word, not even goodbye. That should've been the end of it but my mind was restless. I couldn't help but feel irritated that my father might really be back in town and if he was, he might come to see me.

After pulling up to my tiny apartment, I spotted a bouquet of flowers on the steps. They were white chrysanthemums, I wasn't a flower girl but red roses and sunflowers were the kind of thing I liked. Not to mention, chrysanthemums were also associated with death. I picked up the bouquet while looking around to see if there was anyone watching me. There was a card in the bouquet and my cell phone started to ring. I carried the bouquet inside as I answered the phone.

"Are you ready for tonight?"

"Mr. Woo, are you the one that sent the flowers?" I asked.

I set them down on the table without bothering to look at the card just yet.

"Flowers? That wasn't me. Another man is sending you flowers?" He mused.

Woo Wonaje was the man that placed bets on me when I fought. At some point, he'd hired me to represent him when the mafia gangs were doing some championship match. He had a whole team that he put me on and we did really great together. He split the earnings between the five of us, after he took his very large portion. He had this odd fascination with me but he was cute and he gave me a good cut when I fought.

"Well, someone sent them but I can't guarantee it was a man." I joked with stale humor.

He laughed over the phone.

"So what's up? You just called me to see if I was ready to fight?" I asked.

"Yeah, I've got good money betting on you tonight."

"You always have good money betting on me Mr. Woo what's different about this time? "

"You have got to stop calling me that."

I smiled on my end,

"I can't, force of habit. Not to mention, I don't want anyone else to think you're showing favoritism."

"Since when do you give a shit what others think?"

I had to give him that. That wasn't a recently new fact. I was known for being aggressive even to my boss when he tried to shut me down off of cases that were high profile. I was a good detective. I didn't care if people thought I wasnt because I was a woman. I could prove them wrong.

"Anyway, the money on you tonight was also placed by another bidder. He's big time and I'm hoping to impress him with you." He said.

As I was listening to him, I grabbed the card out of those flowers and dropped the bouquet in the trash on my way to the sink. I opened the card and reached for a bowl to pour cereal in despite it being past twelve in the afternoon.

"So you want me to put on a good show," I said reaching for the cereal, temporarily forgetting the card I grabbed so I could pour a bowl "so the call is for what: motivation, asking a favor, a warning?"

I heard Wonjae chuckle over the phone while I used my spoon to stab my cereal into my milk. I took a scoop to put in my mouth while he began to speak and I grabbed the card as well.

"I don't need to warn you about anything, it is a favor though. This guy has major connections and-"

"Ah- I told you I don't want to know that stuff. I may not be a cop anymore but the less I know the better. Trust me."

I looked at the note on the card and didn't recognize the hand writing but the note was all to clear as to what it was telling me.

'I'm home.'

A chill ran down my spine and for the moment I stopped listening to Wonjae on the other line. My father already knew where I lived. How did he find that out? I moved after Jiwoo died.

"Um, listen Woo I have to take a shower. I'll see you tonight. Anything you want to brief me on can be done at Nova."

He must've noticed the change in my voice because he sounded slightly disappointed now.

"Yeah, alright. I'll see you tonight."

"Yup."

I hung up the phone right after that. It probably seemed rude on his end and if the tables had been turned I would've been insulted but this was something that had my attention. Clearly my father was trying to make a statement just as Minsik told me he may have been back in town. Since it wasn't his hand writing I wondered if he just called the note in to be delivered or if he actually dropped them off himself and he was in town.

I didn't want to focus on it, so I finished eating my cereal, albeit, in silence but I finished it. When I got to the bathroom to actually took a shower, thoughts of whether or not my father was back began to circulate throughout my head. I stood there, beneath the hot water hitting the top of my head and streaming down my face like a fresh waterfall. There wasn't much else I could do but just think: what is my next move? I wiped my face so I could see in the shower and placed my hands on the shower door. I started feeling stressed and flashes of Jiwoo's dead body streaked in my mind. It was like watching a tv show on rewind only the pain was just as real and twice as painful to relive. It felt like something was crushing my heart and before I knew it I had planted my fist into the wall.

I got out of the shower after that. There was nothing I could do about my father being back unless he came to face me. Him sending the flowers might have been his way of saying he was watching me. If he knew where I lived, didn't that mean he knew I was no longer a cop? He was at least smart enough to stay away. My anger matched his own. There were many times neither one of us could control ourselves when we were furious. We made some of our worst decisions then.

I headed to Nova after I was dressed. Despite it being early, the underground club was packed. Music played loud enough for a party but low enough so you could hear what the person next to you wanted to say. The place smelled of sweaty men, gym clothes and blood. Lots of blood. That was never a surprise for a place like this. I over heard a lot of stuff here but as long as I wasn't personally involved, it was no longer my job to do something about the illegal activities here. To be fair, I was engaging in illegal activities myself, implicating anyone would also mean admitting why I was ever here.

I saw Wonjae in the corner speaking to a fair skinned man, he wore a nice three piece suit but I could see a glint of blood on his black shinning shoes. He probably stepped on someone's face. I stifled a laugh at my own thoughts because his skin wasn't the only thing fair about him. He had a gentle face, the kind of face that didn't look like it belonged on a mafia boss. He probably wasn't even in the mafia. Maybe he was a cruel businessman and some victims blood splashed on his shoes.

Wonjae caught me in the corner of his eye as I passed by causing the man he was speaking with to pay attention to me. Wonjae pointed at me then waved me over to him. I didn't want to but no one in their right mind refused Wonjae. I headed over with my bag thrown across my shoulder. My fighters tape was already reapplied and I had a leather jacket on top of my red sports bra. I actually had jeans on that made me look a little more casual than a fighter. The man he was talking to might've thought I was a spectator. He looked me up and down and a smug smile appeared on his lips. It crossed my mind that this might be the guy Wonjae wanted to impress tonight.

"Lee Seonghwa, this is Y/N. My best fighter." He said.

Great now he knew my name. At least he didn't give him my full name, birthday and social security. I looked at Wonjae and he gave me very serious eyes, as if warning me to be kind, while smiling at me. I sighed and waved at the guy,

"What's up."

"Charming." Seonghwa said.

"If you wanted charming go to a ball. This is a fighters ring. The requirements aren't good manners, it's being able to beat the shit out of your opponent." I cut back.

Wonjae gave me a smart smile, he couldn't expect more or less from me. I had less patience now and with my father possibly lurking around I was even more on edge.

"Well put. I'm looking forward to seeing you out there." He said.

Seonghwa had rested his chin on his knuckles with his long forefinger stretching up to press against his cheek. He looked both impressed and skeptical at the same time. Like he had already determined the ending of my fight. I noticed a ring on his finger in the form of a square, it was large and the diamonds that lined it seemed to glitter even in the terrible lighting of the club. I couldn't see much more of it because of the position of his hand but I could tell that ring wasn't cheap. It probably cost more than what we won collectively at the championship.

I didn't want to ask questions, I didn't even want to know the guys name but it was too late for that part. I decided to excuse myself while I still had a chance to break away before any more unnecessary information was unveiled to me. I went to the back room they had set up for fighters to get in their clothes. There weren't any men around from what I could see and all I really needed to do was change my pants so I hurried and slipped out of them and went into my bag to get my shorts. I could hear the footsteps of someone approaching and I stood up, pulling my pants up just as I saw Kiseok walking in.

"Hey, you see the guy talking to Wonjae?" He said.

"Uh, yeah I met him. He's--okay I guess."

"You don't sound impressed."

"Am I ever impressed by anyone that comes through here?"

"Good point." He said.

I picked my bag up and threw it back over my shoulder. Kiseok was rapping his hands in fighters tape. I was more toned than him. When I first met him, I thought he was bigger but then I saw him and noticed he was just wearing big clothes. That didn't mean he wasn't fighter material. For a long time, Kiseok was in the top five pairing for Nova fighters. I came in and he was almost pushed down until he proved himself to be far better than what others had assumed he was.

All the fighters usually hung out until it was time for the fights to begin. The large ring in the middle was covered by chain link gates, they were painted black but from the blood, cleaners and bodies banging against them the paint was chipping as well as showing a slightly rusted sliver color. Kiseok and me were doing small sparring sessions with each other while in the midst of talking about all the other gangs being in the club. Nova was neutral ground, guards checked bags to make sure no weapons of any kind were brought into the club. It was against house rules to fight outside of the ring and usually when there was conflict the bosses would choose their fighters and throw them in the ring to settle a beef. This was also where deals and negotiations happened. I knew the ins and out of this place but that was about it. I did my best to
not go deeper into this criminal world than I needed too.

Time went by fast in Nova, like this was a whole other dimension where time didn't move the same way as it did above ground. I was watching fights with Kiseok until it was my turn to fight. I had some steam to blow off. I was fighting this chick Chae lee. We had fought before a few times. The last time I fought her she busted my lip and I dislocated her jaw. We both walked out needing ice and stitches but ultimately I had won. Each time she came back to fight me she got a little better but no stronger.

Her hair was braided back into two French braided ponytails. I cut my hair short a long time ago, my bangs may have been the longest part of my hair style. My gloves were red hers were yellow. They reminded me of Minsik all the time. She fought for a guy named Kwon. That's all they called him, that's the only name they knew him by.

We hit gloves like a show of sports menship and then set up for a fight. The ref, for all intents and purposes, called out the rules. Fight until a knock out or a tap out. They rang the bell and then we were at it. Chae took a swing that was faster than her normal speed but my reflexes were quick enough to block it. I wasnt quick enough to block the upper cut that she landed in my gut. It was a hard punch too, one that made me feel like that cereal I ate earlier might come back up. It happened so quick, I was just a little shocked. I could hear the crowd react but how they felt didn't really register until moments later. I had stumbled back and Chae came again with another swing. I ducked down and hooked her leg to trip her up. She landed on her back and rolled before I could get on top of her. She made her way to her feet but amazingly had enough time to block my punch coming for her.

Chae swung left, then right. I blocked the first one then took the punch. The force from her punches felt way different than any other time we fought. I did a round house kick which she blocked with her left hand. She closed the distance between us and punched me square in the chest. I fell to the ground completely shocked and rocked to the core. I didn't mind Chae being better than me but she's never been this strong. No amount of training in the world could give her this kind of strength and speed. I had never struggled with fighting before.

I summoned the will I had and got back to my feet but damn, my chest was aching. I put my guard back up. I did a bob and weave to avoid her now lightning fast hands. I was able to land a blow to her jaw again. She didn't seem too hurt by it, which was a sting to the pride. I grabbed her and kneed her in the stomach three times before I pushed her against the gate. I came after her quick trying to capitalize on the moment and hit her with a barrage of punches in the chest. It took a lot of energy from me. I hit her square in the jaw again and when she hit the floor I backed up to regain my composure.

I think I heard Wonjae tell me I was doing good but there was a ringing in my ears now. The crowd was dull and my adrenaline was pumping. My blood rushed through me like it was running a race. I bounced back and forth giving Chae sometime to get up.

She made it to her feet and stood in place for a moment. She put her dukes up again and was ready to come back at me. I didn't feel nervous or angry. I felt- excited. I was excited because there was a fire in her eyes that I hadn't noticed before. I don't think it had ever been there. I caught myself giving a little smirk as I put my guard back up.

Chae came in fast, her fists were faster than I could anticipate; she was knocking me around like a rag doll. She had me against the gate, her punches were fast and furious. She got me in the jaw, my chin and my nose. I didn't have time to really recover from each blow because she followed it with a new one. Everything was getting blurred now because one of her punches opened a gash above my eyebrow. The crowds loud cheers from amazement and excitement came in and out of my ears as I lay on the ring. I didn't want to lose. There was so much I had to get out, I couldn't let her beat me.

I started using the fuel I got from my father and then I thought about my brother. I felt my blood rush again. Chae was giving me one hell of a fight, now it was time for me to give it back to her. I slowly made it back to my feet. One of my eyes closed because of the blood dripping down from my cut. I wiped it away and tried to regain some balance. Chae gave me a smile like she had no doubt that I was going to get back up. Like she was enjoying this fight as much as I was. I put my guard back up. We circled each other waiting for the perfect moment to strike. I could feel my heart pounding. This fight was intense, Chae had never been this kind of challenger for me. She was now.

She jabbed at me and I moved out of the way my right fist hit her in the chest and she stumbled back. She came forward only seconds later with two sharp jabs both of which I blocked. She aimed for an upper cut but my knee came up to block her attempt. I quickly took advantage and swung left knocking her hard enough to make her stumble in the other direction. The crowd went insane from the blow. I came after her trying not to give her time to recover.

I kicked at her mid section and then punched towards her chest she blocked but I kept going. Her guard was up with each fist I planted into her. I kicked again and she was knocked down onto the ground. I got on top of her and started to throw down as much as I could. The fury of my past started welling up with each punch. She was able to guard most of them but a few I got to her. I got her again in the face, I thought I felt her nose break but I wasn't sure. I didn't stop to find out.

She reacted to one of my punches by hitting me in the stomach and it had caught me off guard enough to give her an opening. She scooted from under me and planted her foot in my stomach. I curled over onto the ground meaning to get up but was in a lot of pain this time. Chae got up and grabbed me by the back of my head and in some sort of fury she started to smash my face into the ground. After about three hard hits, I was spitting out blood and in a daze once again. The cut above my eye started bleeding again.

The crowd seemed to have suddenly gone silent or maybe I had too much blood rushing to my ears and couldn't hear anything anymore. I did feel Chae grab my arm and pull it back almost like she intended to break it. I groaned in pain and my hearing slowly came back to hear the crowd chanting almost like half was hoping I'd continue the fight while the other half wanted Chae to finish me off. Above their screaming I heard Chae say,

"Tap out!"

I didn't want to. I wanted to finish this fight as the winner but my energy had been sapped. She had been a better fighter in this match. It was strange because she was stronger and faster in her reaction time but it wasn't like a normal progression from training. Something was up, like she was on steroids or pcp.

"Tap out!" She screamed at me again.

She pulled back on my arm even more, it felt like my muscle was going to tare. Her knee pushed deeper into my back to let me know that she has the true intention to break my arm. I kept my hand up, I was trying hard not to tap out but she pulled again and I tapped out. Chae let go of my arm and I laid on the ground for a moment. She beat me and my arm was killing me.

I got up slowly while holding my arm. I saw Wonjae looking at me with a tight face. I didn't feel like I made him look bad, with all the matches that I have won in the past losing one shouldn't have been a big deal to him. He didn't look amused, he looked very annoyed. Something caught my eye as I looked away from him. A man pushing his way through the crowd to leave. His gait, clothes and salt and pepper hair color looked familiar but I couldn't see his face. Yet, there was still something in my chest that beat hard, like I knew exactly who that person was...

My father...

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Junmyeon released your hand and walked up to the headstone and placed his hand on the top of it. "Hey mom...I'm back." He said. You looked at him hurt. You covered your mouth and let out a soft breath. His mother was dead. You could only imagine how it felt for him. Did he really understand what you went through as a child? Junmyeon looked back at you and said, "My mother died-- was killed when I was seven years old and the man who did it was my own father." You swallowed when he said that, it was scary to hear him say something like that happened to him when he was a child. It didn't seem to even slightly compare to what you went through. His seemed worse by a lot more. "Did you see it happen?" You asked. He shook his head, "My dad was really frantic that morning. He was always kind of rough around the edges, he was a real disciplinarian but that morning I knew something was really wrong. When I tried to run to my mom, he took me out of the house and packed me up in the car." He sighed heavy, like the weight of the events that took place where ready to cave in his chest. He sat down in front of the tombstone and leaned against it. You could see a hollowness in his dark brown eyes. Without the sun to illuminate them, they looked like black holes sucking in space. He almost looked like someone petrified and frozen in time by the fear. He continued his story with his eyes glued to the ground. "He yelled at me a lot that morning, especially because I was whining for my mom, then he just got oddly calm and told me that we'd all be together soon." There was a pause and his expression changed like he was questioning his father's actions right now. It was almost as if he was watching the whole memory play out and he was a ghost of the future making comments on the side lines. You partly wondered if he remembered he had you as an audience. "He drove us to this place we used to vacation at and he sat me down to talk to me. He was calm then, it was a normal conversation between a father and son but I could tell he wasn't himself. So when he left to go to the car, I decided to wander off. I walked for miles, I wasn't sure how long but there were some cops that saw me walking alone and started asking me where my parents were. I told them that my mother was at home and I didn't want to go with my dad. So, they took me to my place and it turns out my dad didn't even lock the door. So I ran up to my mom's room and that's when I found her- laying there," "Junmyeon stop." You said. Your heart was racing and tears had rolled down your face, you could hear the pain in his voice. He looked up at you and his eyes widened a little. You were sure he wasn't expecting you to be the one that cried. You knelt down to be on his eye level. He gave you a pained smile. "You don't have to do this. You don't have to relive it." you said. "Just listen... When they found my father, I was still with them. I didn't see him kill himself but I heard the gun shot. I saw his body hit the ground. My father's mental stability was so skewed he was planning to kill me too, the police were sure of it and then he probably would've killed himself. If I didn't run away I would be dead." "My father won't do that." You denied. "Y/N you've admitted he has bipolar disorder. I saw how he changed moods very quickly but I also know that he likes controlling you. I think he likes it because you look like your mother. It's his way of punishing her instead. He can control her by controlling you." "I'm not my mother Junmyeon." He touched your face tenderly, the brush of his finger tips on your face awakened your senses. He was close to your face, you felt your heartbeat trip over itself. It stopped and started again while he looked in your eyes. You saw something in his eyes you never thought you would've seen coming from him. "You're not your mother but I'm very scared that your father doesn't always know that. When his moods change, I don't think he can tell that the person he's trying to hurt isn't his ex wife and I am terrified that he'll end up doing to you what my father did to my mother." You were terrified of your father but you never had the nerve to keep him away. You acted more like him than you wanted to admit. When someone left you, you erased everything that connected you to them. You erased them from your life the way you erased Heechul from yours. You were even going to push Siwon and Ryeowook out because of what happened. You erased people and memories and that was exactly what your father did when your mother left. You were angry that your mother left you behind with him and she never gave you a reason why. "I come and talk to a stone as a way to feel closer to my mother. Are you going to make me talk to you that way too?" You smiled through some tears trying to change the mood. "You'd talk to me in death? I didn't know you cared." "Neither did I." He said seriously, "but I do and I know what that helplessness feels like. I saw how scared you were last night. I saw how hurt you were. My grandparents helped me with my PTSD and the fact that Minseok isn't trying to convince you to stay away from him pisses me off." "He's tried, I just don't listen." "Then listen now Y/N. Don't let him hurt you anymore. Just because he's blood doesn't mean you have to endure it." You shook your head. You wanted to break away from him, you had for years but he was your father. He was all you had, if you pushed him away maybe he would die like he said. Maybe it would make things worse and he'd show up at your place and kill you like Junmyeon had feared and maybe you got to go on with your life, maybe you'd be free of him but then you'd have no one left. You were more afraid to be alone than you were of dying and even as you thought that, you knew deep down it was illogical. You stood up and pulled Junmyeon up with you. You wiped your eyes and Junmyeon wrapped his arms around you to pull you into an embrace. You were surprised by it but you relaxed in his arms and heard the pounding of his heart. It sounded like it was running away. You looked up at him and he looked down at you. Your eyes locked and there was a moment you felt you may swoon just from the look in his eyes. The cemetery was still and the world followed with it. Junmyeon placed his hand on your cheek again, caressing it sweetly. His eyes started to follow the path his thumb took to feel your cheek. He bent his head an inch as if he were about to do something but stopped himself. Your eyes looked at his lips for a moment before they looked back at his eyes. You took in a shaky breath and pulled away from him. You pulled hair behind your ear as you cleared your throat, "Um, I will- I will try and...do what you said." Junmyeon cleared his throat and threw hands in his pockets. The moment had become awkward so suddenly. Junmyeon started to lead you out of the cemetery and decided to talk about something else. "So why was the cat at our place last night?" "My dad would've made a big deal about it. If I could pay for a cat then I could pay for my tuition too." "Oh." He sounded like he realized he made a mistake by asking that question because it all came back to your father's treatment of you. You were still shaken by Junmyeon's story and there was so much you wanted to ask him but you saw how hurt he was when he was talking about it. You couldn't fathom how much it hurt for him to tell you that story. "The funny thing is, I never bought the cat. My boyfriend at the time bought her for me." "Really? A whole animal he must've really loved you. I can't imagine why you two broke up." You chuckled, "He cheated on me." "Why is that funny?" He smiled oddly at you. "Because your comment sounded really sarcastic." He laughed with you and it seemed like the tension between you two had finally lifted. You both walked in silence for a little while without much of a destination in mind. You considered talking about your project but your project was about depression it didn't make sense to start a topic like that after everything that had been discussed. "So, I know it's probably not something either of us wants to talk about right now but I just have to know," you stopped in front of him, "Now that we know these things about each other...Where do we go from here?" Junmyeon looked like he didn't really know what to say. You were in the same boat but things were different now. He knew something about you that only Minseok knew and you knew something about him you were sure no one else close to him knew. How did it get to this? The two of you couldn't get along often, you competed to see who was smarter than the other and you were both... empathizing with each other. "Well you know something about me and I know something about you, now we've got leverage over each other." "I'm being serious Junmyeon." "Serious? Okay- seriously speaking, I think we should take the time to understand each other and watch what we say. You only annoy me some of the time but I know that some of the things I've done to piss you off on purpose could've really triggered you. I know better now." "I can handle that." You said. He grinned like he was about to say something but he didn't. There was nothing much left to say so you two stopped by a diner to get lunch and then went your separate ways. The conversation between you two was relaxed, it was the first time you two were around each other for a long period of time and neither one of you fought. Although, the competitive nature between you two didn't disappear you both found ways to compete in a healthy way. Junmyeon had to leave for his night shift which left you going back home. The silence of home, even with Lady running about, was no longer comforting though. Your mind jumped back to your father pushing you down and hitting you in front of company. Junmyeon never would've seen it happen if he hadn't shown up or if your father didn't invite him in....or if you hadn't mentioned your mother. You laid down on the couch, you knew full well you had homework but you didn't want to move from where you were. Saying you'd run away from your father was one thing but doing it was another. You couldn't help but think about how brave Junmyeon was for leaving his father and trying to make his way back home to his mother. He was only seven, you were ten and couldn't manage the idea of leaving your dad. You were older and couldn't manage it now. Your phone rang and the collar idea read "Father". You didn't want to answer it, you shouldn't have but-you did. You placed the phone to your ear but didn't say anything for a second. You almost thought to hang up but you finally mustered the ability to say, "Hello." "Y/N." It sounded like he was crying on the other end. These calls were too routine, you knew everything that would be said and what would end up happening. It was the same story with the same predictable ending. You really wanted to listen to Junmyeon and cut him off but you didn't know how without the big fall out. You felt as if you were damned if you do and damned if you don't because either way, your father knew where you lived and he wouldn't let up. "Please don't hate me ttal, I'm sorry." He whined. The sound of his crying was almost sickening to you. "I don't hate you papa." You said softly. You just hated that he hit you. You hated that he scared you and manipulated you. You hated that Junmyeon might be right, even if your father might not mean to kill you, it's possible he might kill you on accident. You heard him cry and say, "Please forgive your papa. I'm so sorry." "It's okay papa." Your tone said that you weren't interested. You'd seen him cry before. You knew how bad his disorder got when he didn't take his meds. If you asked him about it he'd lash out again. You didn't want to deal with that. You didn't really want to care. You were sure you didn't but you wanted to avoid more trouble. "Is your friend going to tell the police what I've done? I'll never be able to see you again. You won't come and visit me." He said. "Papa, nothing is going to happen to you....Papa," You wanted to say it, to tell him you needed some space. Your hand shook a little as you thought it. You didn't want to make him angry but that was the issue. You didn't want to do anything to alter his mood any more than it already was. You wondered how long it would be before he was overly happy again. Those were the days you tried to make yourself remember when your father lost his temper. When he took you and Minseok out for ice cream and he held your hand, you two were actually smiling and having fun. His highs always followed with lows that were painful for you to endure. It seemed worse when he didn't take his medication. "Y/N? Are you there honey?" He asked. You came back to reality and said, "Um, Papa you should schedule a doctor's appointment to get a stronger medication." "I'm fine, I was just angry. I don't need medication." He still sounded distraught but he wasn't angry. You didn't want to push him even harder. What were you supposed to do? You sat on the phone with him in silence for a while before you made up an excuse that you had to get your school work done. You had work in the morning and class right afterwards so you didn't have time to linger on the phone any longer. He let you go, apologizing again and telling you he loved you. You hesitated when he said that and he called your name to see if you were still on the other end. "I love you too papa." You said. "Good. You're a good girl." You could imagine a faint smile forming on his face. It was a sad pathetic smile that didn't mean much. You wondered if you had always felt this way about your father. It would make sense if you did, that deep down somewhere inside of you, you really dispised him but because he was all the family you had, you convinced yourself to push it down. Even after you hung up the phone, you kept thinking about what Junmyeon said to you. The fact that his father would've really killed him was terrifying and it was even scarier that he was only seven when it happened. It made you think about the real possibility that maybe one day your father's temper would get out of hand. You had to ask yourself the question, was that the real reason behind why you were so terrified of your father. Deep down, were you always afraid he may kill you? Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw
United Front for Peace! (Guideline Review)
Elo all you Beautiful Souls So today all Presidents of the Communities witness Netitizen at it worse. Vingle as well as all Presidents Don't tolorate of any kind of HASSASMENT/BULLYING. We are all here because we all have something in common and want share our love for that common factor, if not find kindred sould that feel the same way we feel. SO! Do to this chain of events... seems we need to review the AOMG and H1ghr Music Guildlines with grounds from Vingle Guildlines 1. Check Urself Before You Reck Urself... A.) No Bullying of any kind... > I will not be nice the second I spot it or its brought to my attention. I will mark you with a strike before you can say 'Oppa',. You hit a second strike I will report you straight to Vingle. > If you attack someone straight out with Bullying I will make you Vingle's problem in seconds. I won't even give you a strike. > If you witness any type of bullying/harassment... Instead of Laughing at them or getting Anger at them please report this event to the Community President if not Vingle. > Please reframe from using Racist name calling of any kind. B.) No Nudity/Sexual Explicit on Chat/Card > Meaning if you do a fanfiction with Smut MARK IT WITH A 18+ WARNING, and do not use any nude photos. > If you are just straight showing nudes or making any harassmental sexual contact with anyone via chat/card, That is not only breaking the community rules, BUT as well as Vingle Guildlines... I will report you without warning and leave you in Vingle's hands as judgement. C.) You are Superheros WITH hidden Identitys... > So reframe from putting out you informantion like digits for everyone to see. Don't want anyone putting themselves at cyber risk of having a stalker. > Exchanging of Kakao or Line or What's Up app names its fine as long as its between mutual parties. Though recommended you put those Kakao|Line|What's Up tags in your Profilio. > REMEMBER! Everyone can see your cards, and the chats. So play smart and safe. D.) Keep Cards Relevant to Community... > Keep in mind that there is a Community and Interest or everything and anything. (Ex: Jimin Community is for Cards involving BTS if not Jimin MAINLY) > I will not approve your card if it coordinate with AOMG or H1ghr Music Community. PLEASE! Lets stay united create Love not War. We hate it when Netitizen attack our favorite Idols even when they didn't read what they said correctly/properly and just jump to conclusions.. So why do it to one another? Play Nice! Be Safe! Stay Healthy! Sepread the Love! ☆♡T.O.P Tabi Council Ladies♡☆ @Starbell808 @BBxGD @MelissaGarza @royalpandajedi @Just2bloved @cns1391 BBMG Squad: @BBxGD @LocoForJiyong @MarrickeJ33 @DayDaySMDC ♣BO$$ Squad: @MarrickeJ33 @BBxGD @starbell808 @FromBlue2U @QueenPandaBunny @royalpandajedi @LiyahBoon @MelissaGarza @BabydollBre My Bunnies: @CLAKPOP @divanicola05 @Peachsenpai @Yugykookie97 @lop0929 @SHINee4ever @InfiniteUtopia @JaxomB @YazminYanez @SweetDuella @QueenyCrossGene @BTSMicDrop @Halsyeon @MaeLyn @VeronicaArtino @awkwardjazzy @AkiraMarie13 @Yugkookie97
Trauma Ch.6
Who: Reader x Kim Junmyeon What: Angst, Romance, Smut Story: You're just two trauma filled people trying to live normal lives... but trauma is a bitch Junmyeon's POV Y/N came over to work on their project again. Two long weeks had passed since he had told her about his past. The flashbacks in his dreams didn't stop but now mixed with seeing her in them. When they spoke at the cemetery, he had felt something he was unaware of. Almost like he was afraid to break her as he touched her but he had a desire to protect her. He understood what Minseok meant when he said she was fragile but he knew why no one would ever guess that. She acted as though nothing had gone on the past two weeks. Everything was normal with them, the same way he had gone on with his life, medication aside, he was normal. From the outside, no one would know the two of them had experienced the worst trauma imaginable. He found himself staring at her while she was in his room. She no longer had an aversion to sitting on his bed. She was laying across it with her laptop open, she was scrolling through some webpage and she had a psychology book open beside her. Their project was more detailed now, probably too detailed considering they only had about six minutes to present all their facts. She was working on the written paper part of it. He helped with the research but he felt like her part was still the biggest of the whole project. She volunteered for it, saying it was her strong suit. He wondered what else was her strong suit. He was curious about her now and his curiosity was being starved by her. Since he'd talked to her about everything going on with her father, she seemed to want to keep him at arms length. It was like she wanted to go back to her everyday normal life and that scared him. He just knew that meant if she was trying to assume her normal life that also meant letting her father get close again because to her that was normal. He had already heard her make up excuses to keep him around. Junmyeon could understand that she didn't want to be alone but she wasn't alone. She had her friends, she had Minseok why would she want to keep allowing that man, who called her pathetic, worthless, a bitch, to continue being in her life? Just because they were blood didn't mean he wouldn't hurt her. He knew that first hand and now she knew it. What was she so desperately clinging onto? Junmyeon had been staring at her for so long that Y/N could feel it because she looked up at him curiously. She offered a little smile, though it was a bit bashful. "What?" She asked. "What?" She chuckled light heartedly, "You've got a look on your face," she said. "What look?" She sat up while covering her pen with its cap. She crossed her legs and said, "Like you want to say something but you don't want to say it...or can't." He stared at her for a moment and then looked away. He didn't really know what he wanted to say. There were things he wanted to ask her like was she okay, did she talk to her father, was she going to stop seeing him? He didn't ask her any of those things. He just sighed and stood up, "I'm going to get a beer, you want one?" "No I'm good. I probably shouldn't be drinking while I'm constructing an argument," she laughed. He smiled at her politely and walked out to the kitchen. Something about being around her was bugging him. It was that feeling he always got when he was around her though, this need to be on her nerves just so he would be the center of her attention. He took a sip of the beer he pulled out of the fridge while he recalled the gigantic smile she gave Siwon when she saw him. They must've been close for her to be so happy to see him. Was she ever happy to see him, Junmyeon wondered? Does she even like me? He thought. Maybe that was a dangerous thought. He wasn't even sure where it came from. Maybe it had something to do with the day at the cemetery, when he touched her face. He saw her crying for him not just for herself. It touched him in some way he couldn't explain. He felt closer to her for a moment but now that she had pulled back he was a little frustrated by it, especially if that meant she was going to give her father another chance. He was lost in thought as he was leaving the kitchen, he didn't hear Y/N approaching. He bumped into her by accident and his beer spilt on her shirt and exploded onto the ground when he dropped it. She gasped when the beer splashed on her pants as well. She pinched the dry parts of her shirt and pulled it from her skin. "Shit, I'm so sorry Y/N I didn't see you there." He said. "It's alright, I should've been louder I guess." Junmyeon grabbed a napkin and hurried to pat her shirt down until he realized he was patting along her breasts. He stopped and laughed awkwardly and handed her the napkin, "Maybe I better let you do that." "Yeah. Thanks." Junmyeon scrambled to get his beer cleaned up as Y/N made her way into the living room and took a seat. She slipped off her socks that had gotten wet as well and sat with them in her hand. She turned the TV on, now giving the room some noise. He finished cleaning up and walked over, "Glad to know you're so comfortable here you can just turn the TV on." He chuckled. Staring at the TV, fliping through channels she said, "I thought you said you'd stop teasing me." "I wasn't teasing," he sat down. "I'm just making an observation." She had turned on a drama to start watching. She must've hit a dead end in her project, that or they really had been working on it for too long. They had been working for at least two and a half hours straight. The time went by so fast, it probably didn't seem like they had spent that much time working until he got up. Junmyeon had retrieved a new beer and sipped on it while watching the drama with her. His arm instinctively relaxed on the back of the couch. He noticed she shifted in her seat for a moment, almost like she was avoiding him. He set his beer down on the table and said, "Y/N why are you doing that to me?" "Doing what?" She asked, still watching TV almost as if not taking him seriously. Or maybe she wanted to avoid eye contact with him. "Why are you avoiding me?" "Who's avoiding? I've been here doing a project with you and now I'm watching TV with you, how is that avoiding?" She tugged at the bottom of her shirt raising the wet part off of her body. He still felt bad about that even though he never heard her coming. She was as sneaky as her cat. "You don't talk to me much" he said. "It's not like we've talked much to each other before. What conversation we did have involved insults being passed around like a bong at a frat party." He chuckled at the reference, it seemed out dated but she was right. He wanted to talk to her now. The main thing that was on his mine was, is she alright but he didn't want to ask it. He was afraid if he did, he might upset her. She was staring at the TV the entire time she spoke with him though, and that was annoying him. He grabbed the remote and shut the TV off, which finally gave him her attention. "What?" She said. "Can't you at least respect me enough to look at me when we talk?" "I'm looking at you now." "Are you that annoyed that I got you wet?" "Excuse me?" she said, her eyebrows raised. Junmyeon rolled his eyes, "You know what I mean...Unless?" He added suggestion in his voice with the last bit even though he knew he didn't do anything to her to turn her on. At least, he didn't think he did. She smiled though, finally seeming to relax the tension he was feeling and said, "No, I know what you meant I was just messing with you. I'm not annoyed with you Junmyeon. I think you're just reading into things." "I don't think so. You've always been different towards me, ever since we met. You seem so loving with others, so why do I get the feeling that you're always trying to shun me?" She faced him more and took in a breath before she said, "I think the bigger question is, why do you feel the need to be liked by everyone? Or more specifically, me?" It was a good question. He had never felt himself to be a narcissist but as she asked that it took him back to how he felt when she was speaking to Siwon. He wanted her to look at him the same way for some reason. Something was churning in his gut that he didn't understand. For some reason, he wanted to be wanted by her. He couldn't pin point where this feeling was stemming from. He wondered if it had always been there. He looked deep into her honey crisp rounded eyes. Some how they looked doe like to him as she stared back. She looked innocent, he started wondering did her mother drive her father crazy with that look. Were those eyes the reason he had fallen in love with her? In love? Was that what he was feeling? There was no way, the feeling of love wasn't that foreign to him. He loved his grandparents but falling in love was much different and definitely uncharted territory for him. He liked the way she looked, he always had even if he never told her. He was drawn to her when he fist saw her in the apartment talking to Minseok. It had more to do with how cheery she was. That's what made him want to join in on the conversation in the first place. By the time he gathered himself together to sit down by her the mood between them had already changed. He was annoyed that she didn't resume that same demeanor when he sat down though, even as Minseok changed the subject. He supposed he always did tease her because sometimes there was something he said that made her laugh at him. He never noticed how that made him feel though. No, he couldn't be falling in love with her. Yet, his chest felt a little tight as he stared back at her. He had gotten so deep in his head that he cleared his throat and stood up quickly. "Let me get you one of my t-shirts. Looks like you don't like wet clothes." He said. It was his excuse to get away from her for a moment. He took his time getting the shirt too. There was a knock on the door just as he was coming back out of his room. He handed her the shirt and went to answer it. He was surprised to find both his grandparents standing at the door. His grandmother opened her arms wide, "Hello Myeonie!" She said. She wore a giant smile and gave him a big hug. He was so glad to see them too. "Hey grandma Ji Ji. Hi gramps, why didn't you guys tell me you were coming?" He said. He stepped aside to let them in and then walked with him deeper into the house. "We were out and around here so we thought we would surprise you. We're glad your home." His grandmother said. "Yeah, I got some hours on my shift cut back so I could work on this school project-" "Oh are we interrupting your work?" His grandmother asked. "No not at all. Actually, I just took a break. Anyway, I'm always happy to see you guys." He said. "That's good. Have you eaten?" His gramps said. "Uh no, not yet. Do you want to go out to-" "Oh! You have company." Y/n said. Junmyeon turned around to see she had come out wearing his white t-shirt. He was actually happy that his grandparents wouldn't be able to tell one way or another that it was his. His grandfather wasn't a subtle person and he would've assumed they were doing something they weren't. "Oh Y/N, these are my grandparents from my mother's side. This is my grandmother Lee Jimin. I call her Ji Ji." Junmyeon said. "Which you're welcome to call me as well." Grandma Ji Ji said with a smile. Y/N smiled big, that smile that she'd given Siwon and so many others. What was it about him that he wasn't getting that same reaction. It was annoying that he was the only one that seemed to notice it. Did she even know she was doing it? Even if she didn't, what did that have to say about the way she felt about him? Was he really that annoying to her? He did have a habit of being cruel to her though, perhaps it would take more time for her to adjust. Y/N had bowed to his grandmother and said, "It's very nice to meet you." Junmyeon continued with the introduction, "And this is my gramps, Lee Junwon." "Nice to meet you as well Lee-nim." She said. She offered another bow with the same pretty smile. Pretty? It was a pretty smile. He might've gone as far as to say beautiful but only in his head. When did he start thinking these things, he could only wonder. "Yah, why are you so formal to them but not me?" He whined. She chuckled which was a far more light hearted mood than before. "Hey, we were going to go out to get something to eat, did you want to join us?" He asked. "Oh no that's okay it's your family time I wouldn't want to intrude." "Oh nonsense child, we'd love to have you join us. Any friend of Junmyeon is welcome." Ji ji said. Y/N smiled politely and said, "Alright. Junmyeon do you mind if I leave my stuff here though?" "Sure, no one will go in my room." She grinned at him like she had a joke to say but stopped herself because of present company. They all left the flat and jumped into his grandparents car. Grandmother Ji Ji was talking about somethings she remembered about Junmyeon while he was a child which made Y/N laugh. He was embarrassed that she was giving away such secrets and giving Y/N ammo to use on him later. His grandparents had lots of questions regarding Y/N like how they met and what she did in school. He had no idea that she worked a late shift at bar as a bartender but he never asked. He found out she was looking to start a non profit organization for abused children. Her aspiration was to give them housing while allowing siblings to stay together rather than be separated by the foster system. She wanted to make sure that even if they weren't adopted by family members or couldn't be taken in by other family members that they had a stable home and were taught well. She admitted she was stilling planning out all she wanted to do but she was happy that her business degree was helping with all of that. Junmyeon's goals weren't nearly as noble as hers were. He wanted to be able to own a business, any business that would allow him to take care of his grandparents and live life happily. He didn't really consider others in his plans. He just wanted to be something other than the little boy that lost his parents in such a tragic way. On the way to the restaurant, Junmyeon heard Y/N laugh and talk as if she'd known his grandparents for years. It was still annoying to him that she was so much more relaxed with everyone else than she was with him. She did seem to warm up a little around him though. She didn't mind sitting next to him in the restaurant and she smiled at him as she spoke to the table. She smiled at him the way he wanted her to smile at him. He was startled again by the way it felt to see her smile back at him. The way she looked when she was happy was drastically different from when she was terrified. He felt like if he had the ability to keep her this happy in life he would; he'd do it every opportunity he could. If he could make her smile permanent, he would. She caught him staring again, he didn't realize he was. He didn't even notice that his grandfather got up to use the restroom. She looked at him giggling from something his grandmother said, "What?" She asked. Her large grin and rounded eyes were alluring, like a innocent babydoll. Those eyes had to have drove her father wild, if she looked just like her mother, he understood why he lost himself when she walked out on them. Though, he didn't know what type of woman her mother was, he was seeing what a gentle soul she was and despite being fragile, she was captivating enough to lose himself. Her skin was soft, he remembered holding her cheeks when she was crying, her cheeks had become a little rosey as he held her face but she was soft. Her cheeks were puffy, squishy. Just as he remembered that touch, he smiled at her. "What?" She asked again. "Nothing," he said. He was almost bashful as he looked away. He cleared his throat and made a B line to the restroom after excusing himself. He could only imagine what his grandmother might say to her but right now he needed advice from the one person in the world he trusted more than anything. Junmyeon entered the bathroom seeing his grandfather washing his hands. "Gramps, I need to talk to you." He said. "In here?" He chuckled. "Yeah, it'll only take a second though." "Alright son, what is it?" "How did you know- when you were in love with grandmother I mean?" "Well that's hard to say," His grandfather thought for a moment as if searching through his history records of that very day. The moment he fell in love. Junmyeon wasn't sure that's what it was but he was feeling something strongly towards her and he was doing everything he could not to kiss her. He had never resisted such an urge but he didn't want to risk scaring her off either, not after she had finally smiled at him the way he so desperately wanted her too. "I suppose I knew I loved her when I realized I didn't want to live without her." Junmyeon looked at him confused. His grandfather laughed and placed a hand on his shoulder. "It was more than that, I didn't want to live without her actually. I just couldn't live without her. Her most annoying traits had become features about her that excited me the most. She made me feel alive when I was around her. She still does." He said. Junmyeon looked down discouraged. He didn't feel any of that for Y/N. Not at the moment at least, he felt protective of her though. He didn't want anyone to harm her, not even her father. Still, there was a throbbing in his chest even as he thought about her. His grandfather sensed that he didn't give him the answer he was hoping for and patted his back, "Don't worry son, when you know you'll know. Just try asking her out on a date." He said. Junmyeon looked at his grandfather suspiciously and his grandfather smiled back. If anyone could pick up how he was feeling and who he was feeling it for, it would be his gramps. He smiled back and they walked out of the bathroom together. There was someone who had stopped by the table and Y/N's face was lit up as she was talking to him. It wasn't the Siwon guy that he had seen before. She was very interested in what he had to say though and she was laughing so hard she covered her mouth. When they made it over to the table, Y/N looked at him and said, "Junmyeon this is Ryeowook. Wookie this is my project partner. He's also Minseok's roommate." "Oh, hi! Nice to meet you." He said. Junmyeon bowed politely, "Nice to meet you too." Y/N popped out of her seat and let Junmyeon scoot inside so she could finish talking to Ryeowook. He felt like he was invisible at the moment. It was starting to crush him a little. "Uh, listen I better go before Heechul gets back." Ryewook said a little weary. She crossed her arms and sounded intrigued, "Oh he's here?" "Yeah, I don't want to make you uncomfortable though." "I wouldn't be. We broke up four months ago I'm over it. Besides, I've missed you two so much, my cutie Wookie!" She sounded cute as she pinched Ryeowook's cheeks. She was friends with her ex's friends? That was odd to him. That also meant that her and Siwon weren't actually an item, old or current. Minseok did tell him she went through a break up. Her friend seemed to blush as she teased him cutely but they also seemed like they were as close as Siwon and her used to be. It was a secret Junmyeon wanted to discover; how does he get close to her? At this point, he seemed obsessed with the idea of getting Y/N's attention he just wasn't sure if it was because it was directed else where, if it was because they experienced a similar past or if it was because he was developing feelings for her. He started wishing he had spent time alone with her. "Oh, here he comes. I better get going." "See yah, tell Siwon to stop by any time okay? Lady misses him." She beamed. Her friend laughed and waved goodbye to her before heading to her ex. Y/N took her seat by Junmyeon again and resumed speaking with his grandparents. Junmyeon wanted to get a better look at the guy that she used to date. He looked over her shoulder, he looked a few years older than both of them. Her ex had turned back to see Junmyeon staring at him. Junmyeon felt territorial for a moment. There was a look in her ex's eye that he didn't like, it was almost the same kind of look he saw in her father's eye when he arrived at her front door. That look made him sick. Junmyeon's arm wrapped around the back of her seat like he was marking his territory and telling her ex to stay away. "Isn't that right Junmyeon? " his grandmother chuckled. Junmyeon looked back at her a little surprised, "Huh?" "We were talking about favorite foods. Yours is japchae right? " she said. "Oh, yeah. Actually, Y/N made some for dinner one night. It was the best japchae I ever tasted." "Really, we'll have to try it someday." His gramps said. Y/N's smile beamed like a ray of sunshine. It was like she was so proud that someone wanted to taste her cooking. "I'd love to have you all over one night to try it!" She said. "We can arrange a date right?" Junmyeon asked. "Of course!" "Oh darling, you must let me bring dessert then." Grandma Ji ji said. "She actually makes the best moon pies in all of Seoul." Junmyeon confirmed. "Sounds like a dinner plan to me. Let me know whenever you're free we can set up a night." Junmyeon actually liked how well his grandparents took to Y/N. He took to her well too. He was definitely feeling a much different way about her now than he had before. After they had finished eating, Junmyeon's grandparents dropped them back off at his flat and Y/N came inside with him to get her things. Minseok had classes earlier that day and work that night so it was obvious he wouldn't be home but neither one of them knew what Jongin was up too. Y/N was gathering all her stuff together when Junmyeon thought he might take a moment to really test what he was feeling. "So how did you like going out with my grandparents?" He asked. "Oh I really like them. I was seriously about the dinner night too. If you all ever want to drop by, just give me a heads up about it. I'd love to have them over." "You seem to be cheerier than before." She nodded with a huge smile. "That's the first time I've ever been around someone's family and felt so welcome. Today was like- being in a dream. Like I got to experience what I always wanted to experience when I was little....It was like I was with family," "My grandparents tend to have that affect on people." he said. She hummed as if day dreaming about being around them again. "Were they the only ones you liked being around today?" He asked stepping up to her. "Hm? What do you mean?" He came closer and his voice lowered almost to a whisper as he gazed into her eyes. "I mean did you enjoy being out with me?" "Yeah, you're more interesting than I gave you credit for." She chuckled. "So let me ask you this," he cupped her cheek again, like he did the day at the cemetery, "does being with me make you feel anything?" Her eyes widened a little, they looked doey that way. Wide, surprised and glittering. She was still like she was just now recognizing how close he was to her. She took in a shaky breath but he couldn't tell if that meant she was turned on or scared. "Like what?" She whispered. "Like how I feel?" He dipped his head down hovering over her lips. "How do you feel?" "Like I want to kiss you...Can I?" The question must've taken her by surprise. She swallowed and her lips parted again with labored breath like her heartbeat started to run away from her. He teased like he'd kiss her hoping to coax an answer out of her. He deeply wanted her to say yes, even if it was in a whisper. His body was aching, he felt excitement rush through him with anticipation. He never asked to kiss, he usually surprised the girl or he just knew it would be okay but with her he couldn't take any chances. He needed to know if this was okay. Everything inside him was hoping it was okay. "Yes." She whispered faintly. Junmyeon smiled, even though he wanted to crash his lips into hers and kiss her so hard he could draw out his soul, he didn't. He lowered his lips to hers and tasted them for the first time, small but soft. She breathed in like she was scared but their lips molded together and Junmyeon's hand felt the softness of her cheek. Their warm wet tongues caressed each other and Junmyeon's heart pounded in his chest. He felt heat rise through his body and that feeling he felt in the restaurant returned again. He wanted her. He wanted her so bad he wanted to scoop her up and take her without asking but he forced himself to be patient, to enjoy the taste of her on his lips like a savory candy. He kissed her long and took his time before pulling away as if he would never get this chance again. He was hoping to get this chance again. It felt like his heart was in his throat as he reluctantly broke the kiss. He looked into her eyes, her pupils now blown up which made him stir below. She looked hypnotized like he caught her under a spell. "Don't hurt me," She whispered. "I don't think I can survive being hurt again." She said. "Believe me, hurting you isn't anywhere in my plans." "What is?" He smiled, lifted her chin and brought his lips to her ear. "Will you let me have you tonight?" He pulled away to look at her face, she looked stunned he even asked her. She looked like she was conflicted between her body wanting to say yes and her mind saying no. She looked scared but she also looked like she wanted to allow it to happen. She looked uncertain. She must've been questioning him in her mind. "Will you be gentle?" she whispered. He smiled and brushed hair behind her ear, "Of course." She looked like she was still thinking her decision through before she looked back at him and said, "Okay." He was ecstatic she agreed. He pulled her close to his body, and kissed her down to the bed. Would sleeping with her fulfill this aching in his heart, he wondered, or would it throb even more to know her? Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw
BTS Family Business +19 Part 1
Yass lawrd!!! Fam I am back with a spicy fanfiction I have been working on. I'm still trying to balance work and my hobbies all at the same time. Life is wonderful and I can't complain. I finally feel complete. I have wonder children and four wonder husband's who are sexy ASF. We are wealthy powerful and healthy. How did I get four husbands? Let me explain. I was adopted by the Cheif of all Yong/Dragon clans. In our world within the human world we have our own laws and ways of life. A female is allowed to have multiple mates or husbands. As long as everyone is married at the same time. After the marriage you cannot add on any mates. Also once mated that male can only have children by that female. If caught cheating anyone can lose their power and status. Our clan has been in power since the dawn of time. We control many things like Kpop, fashion, media... anything we want. We also provide small loans and protection to small businesses. We also are known for our part in killing ppl if they cross us wrong. Anyways they call me Jasmine Kim. I'm married to Namjoon, Yoongi, Hoesek, and Jimin. Altogether we have eight children. Hunter, Ji-Yong, King, Namjin, Stormi, Ava, Princeton, and Taleah. We live in a huge home and we have a luxury condo for time alone. As for me I do have my own room, but unless I'm mad at my huabands all at the same time I sleep in whoever room whenever. Tonight was my night alone with Hobi at our luxury condo. I knew I had tons of stuff to do at the office and I knew the kids would never let me get out the door. I was wise and packed me some lingerie and my heels with me. After work I fixed my hair, reapplied my Fenty glassbomb, and slipped into my sexy lingerie. I threw in my black trench coat and headed deep in the woods to our condo. As I looked down at the clock I was already 20 minutes late. He was gonna be pissed and pacing all over the place. I was going over ways I would get his mind off me being late. As I unlocked the door. I quickly walked into the kitchen. Hobi was there with a pissed off expression. "Ah how can you hold a powerful position in our clan if you can't even be on time to see your husband? Over 20 minutes late babe?! I'm going have to request for you to step down." I walked slowly over to him and made him face me. Even though I had on heels he still was taller than me. I wrapped my arms around his waist. "I'm such a bad wife. You are right baby. Shame on me. Do you still want to see why I was so late?" I said with pouting lips. Hobi smirked and untied my trench coat allowing it to hit the ground. He stepped back to admire my curves in the lingerie hugging me. Hobi sucked on his teeth and lips. "Shit baby..." He ran his hands through his hair. "Can you forgive me baby? I will do anything my husband commands." I said while batting my eyes. "Yeah I know what you can do to be forgiven." Hobi said while putting me over his shoulders. He places me on the bed and we kiss deeply. His lips so soft felt so good. I could feel my core aching. Hobi plays with my nipples as he explores my mouth. Sucking on my lip ring and gliding across my tongue rings. "Gosh baby you taste so good. I know where you would taste even better." Hobi pushes me back while kissing down to my core. He runs his nose from bottom to top of my core. He licks his lips has he tugs away my panties. Hobi spanks my core then he begins kissing all over my inner thighs. I groan in pleasure. He inserts two fingers stretching me wide and slowly pushes in and out. I was already dripping. Suddenly he begins sucking on my nub while fingering me. I gasp as he picks up speed and goes deeper. I grab his head and scream. I could feel myself about to burst. Hobi laughs and stops. "Oh you think I'm gonna let you cum when you can't come on time." He stands up and he gives me that look. " You know the routine." I crawl over to the edge of the bed and unbuckle his pants. His tip was wet. I guess tasting me makes him so hot. I placed my hand at his base while playing with his tip. He moaned louder as my tongue ring slide across his head. I wrapped my lips around his tip. Making sucking noises and running my hand up and down. Hobi groans loudly and hisses. He grabs my head softly and pushes more of himself hitting the back of my throat. I gag and proceed to move my mouth up and down his length making loud slurping nosies. "Ah...baby stop...slow down... shit..." Hobi moaned while pulling out my mouth. He quickly turned me around bend me over. He slapped my left cheek. I groaned. He slapped my right cheek. "You think you call the shots?! You should know better by now." Hobi moaned. Hobi pushed his entire length in me from behind. I scream in pleasure and pain. He begins pounding me without mercy. The bed shook and our skin made a loud slapping noise. He pulled me up my by arms still pounding me. We moved as one. Then he placed me on my back. He pushed my leg behind my head. He grinned as he slapped my core with his beef stick. I pouted. "Ah you are so cute baby." He said while sliding into me. He began moving deep and slow. I groan and grab his butt. He kisses me deeply and continues. I could feel him touching my g spot. "Ah deeper baby. Make your wife come." I moan in his ear. Hobi grunts and pumps deeper. I could feel everything go blank and I hit Utopia as a screamed out his name and gushed everywhere. Hobi filled me to the brim with his warm goodness. He collapsed on top of me as we try to catch our breath. He grins and looks down at me. "I love you baby." "I love you too." I said allowing him to kiss me. ************** I was rushing down the hallway to present what I needed in our meeting. I know people think I have it easy because my adopted father is over the clan and our business. However I do work hard. I earned the title of 1st Lady of our generation. I can hear Yoongi and Hobi laughing has I walk speedy in front of them. Everyone slowly walks in...Namjoon, Jungkook, Jimin, Hobi, Jin, Tae, and Yoongi. We stand when the Cheif Ji-Yong walks in. "Good morning. Let's begin with our progress....Jasmine." TO BE CONTINUED...... Ride or Die Peeps Taglist @lisablinkarmy @SolYLuna @szewwy @koalabear @SweetDuella @DefSoul1994 @blessowmwago @Starbell808 @Jiminsnooder @SarahHibbs @Yugykookie97 @WinKonVIP @simpsonsamantha @lrwc12 @Gladys21 @hyunjinnie @VeronicaArtino @Shanai88 @Mochiroon @jungkookieeeee @Blackrose139 @cathysanchez157 @KittyCat1998 @Kail916 @pandaqueen7 @MelissaGarza
Jay Park being bitter
☆♡T.O.P Tabi Council Ladies♡☆ @Starbell808 @BBxGD @MelissaGarza @royalpandajedi @Just2bloved @cns1391 ❤BBMG Squad: @BBxGD @LocoForJiyong @MarrickeJ33 @DayDaySMDC ♣BO$$ Squad: @MarrickeJ33 @BBxGD @starbell808 @FromBlue2U @QueenPandaBunny @royalpandajedi @LiyahBoon @MelissaGarza @BabydollBre ♦J-Walkers @amobts @AnnaRodriguezm  @BabydollBre @BBxGD @Bwolfgirl @CarolSilva @ckienitz @DayDaySMDC @dreemer13 @elainarenea @EvilGenius @ibMIMI @JasmineGregory @Jaysbae13 @JordanShuler @JohnEvans @KaeliShearer @kolai4 @lcr4562 @lilbr0wneyes @LocoforJiyong @IsoldaPazo @MaelstromVIP @Mandibular @MandyNoona @maricela17mrn @MarrickeJ33 @MayraYanez @mitchix5 @mrsyookiyun @MzDawson31508 @NadineEsquivel @nmeza29  @ParanormalPanda @PriyaBala @QueenLele @QueenPandaBunny @Remysrose @SashaKmseoul  @SierraBecerra @StefaniTre @sugaontop @TheEnlightment @twistedPuppy @VatcheeAfandi99 @ViStorm @ @yaya12 @ZZyxz My Bunnies: @AlenaSegura @ammagrande @AraceliJimenez @InfinitySky @BBxGD @BTSxEXO @CallMeMsDragon @chenisbaekasy @CrystalBlunt  @divanicola05 @DalyRomero @dallasyamane @DDestinaByrd @dreemer13 @Ercurrent @EvilGenius @faith92 @flxvour @FromBlue2U @HHeavenlyLopez @IsoldaPazo @Jaysbae13 @Jiyongixoxo @KaeliShearer @KaiJae @KristinaCaron @KwonOfAKind @lashonda0917 @LemonLassie @lilbr0wneyes  @lovetop @MandyNoona @MaritessSison @marsamusic @MelissaGarza @miruchii @MissT615 @mrsax2018 @mrsyookiyun @MsLoyalHeart @NiahriTaylor @Nikkitty @nmeza29 @pharmgirlerin @PrettieeEmm @QueenLele @raenel @RedChord @salo @sherrysahar @serbshavemofun @SimplyAwkward @Tabili @tiffany1922 @twistedPuppy @VatcheeAfandi99 @victoria97 @yaya12 @Yugykookie97 @ZZnae @lop0929
A New Suga Fanfic coming soon..
would anyone be Interested in a reader/yoongi fanfic? It is going to based of an old country song that I adore... Strawberry Wine by Deanna Carter... The story is an AU fic but a coming of age story. You spend the summers at your grandparents farm with your best friend Taehyung. You aren't a stranger to the college boys that your grandpa hires in the summer to help out with the harvesting and the running of his farm. You grandpa has animals, and produce on his farm but you and Taehyung usually spend it in the Strawberry fields. Your grandpa also makes wine from the strawberries. What you didn't expect was two college boys helping with the strawberries and the wine making. The college kids your grandfather usually hires help with the animals and other functions on the farm. You spend your summer falling in love and not hoping for heartache come September? You naively fall hard but as you get older it becomes a fleeting thought across your mind... If interested in the story comment below. I'm looking forward to writing a story of summer love and first love... but also a story about growing up Suga's Genius' @VeronicaArtino @SugaKookieV @SweetDuella @jeonraeyoo Suga's starchildren @MelissaGarza @Starbell808 if you would like to be added to the official Suga cmty taglist comment below. Taglist is only for the Suga council and will be used on the content we create for the community... My vingle fam @WinKonVIP @luna1171 @LiyahBoon @BTSMicDrop @twistedPDnim @YulaGyeom @MelissaGarza @jjrockstar @yehetmyohorat97 @CrookedShadow @ESwee @Lexxcisco @awkwardjazzy @sukkyongwanser @QueenLeLe @QueenPandaBunny @SweetDuella @BabydollBre @SugaKookieV @InfiniteKiss @QueenyCrossGene @Halsyeon RMs Fearless Leaders @VeronicaArtino @BTSMicDrop @WinKonVIP @MelissaGarza @Just2BLoved @SugaKookieV @DefSoul1994 Taehyung's Purplers @VeronicaArtino @SugaKookieV @SweetDuella @jiminsnooder Suga's Genius @VeronicaArtino @SugaKookieV JIMIN Squad @BTSMicDrop @Queenpandabunny @Just2BLoved @jiminsnooder @SugaKookieV @VeronicaArtino Golden Maknae Crew @SugaKookieV @LiyahBoon @MelissaGarza @Yugykookie97 @DefSoul1994 @VeronicaArtino Sunshine Hope @SugaKookieV @SweetDuella @VeronicaArtino Winner Council @WinKonVIP @MelissaGarza @Just2BLoved @VeronicaArtino Fantastic Losers @WinKonVIP @MelissaGarza @Just2BLoved @Starbell808 @VeronicaArtino BTS @DeyaniraEstrada @lilbr0wneyes @KokoroNoTakara  @cbellea @Helixx @sarahdarwish @Hurdkpop @biancadanica98 @xMangaLover @KellyOriane @wordlesseyes @jojojordy2324 @TleahEdwards @MissyKim @EmilyPeacock @Journ505 @ShadowAngel87 @Kyokeo @GenesisZiporrah @FelicianaRomero @ScarletMermaid @SeoInHan @IMNII @jcl4rks0n @heidichiesa @humairaa @torchix @sarahpjane @SugaKookieV @Bangtanss @ReynadeKpop @PrincessUnicorn @SimplyAwkward  @OneOfAKind @MadAndrea @musicmofo @nicolejb @jcl4rks0n @ashleyemmert @Katherina2078 @unnieArmkeY @AlloBaber  @EvilGenius @Dabaesaplayer @CloverShadows @Mandubum @PassTheSuga @SugalessJams @danidee @ButterflyBlu @B1A4BTS5ever  @btsgotshinee @EasternShell @ShadowAngel87 @EmilyPeacock @Journ505 @MissyKim @TleahEdwards @jojojordy2324 @KellyOriane @xMangaLover @Hurdkpop @peahyr @biancadanica98 @sarahdarwish @cbellea @johnevans @terenailyn @gabbycalzada @taetaebaozi @lilbr0wneyes @xxMollxx @Xionheart @Defy24601 @TanyaGautam @ZionPerezFlower @NickySerban @KwonOfAKind @krin @Emealia @FelicianaRomero @DestinaByrd @ScarletMermaid @ashleyemmert  @Katherina2078 @TaehyungV @Starbell808 @SweetDuella @MelissaGarza @Lexxcisco @resavalencia@sukkyongwanser @KarenGuerra93
Trauma Ch.4
Who: Reader x Kim Junmyeon What: Angst, Romance, Smut Story: You're just two trauma filled people trying to live normal lives... but trauma is a bitch Junmyeon's POV Junmyeon admitted to himself only that Y/N cut him deep when she asked him if he were "so incapable of understanding he wasn't wanted somewhere". That brought back a feeling he didn't want to remember. After what happened tonight though, he understood her a lot more. It cleared up a lot of the things he thought he knew about her. He could tell her father was strict but he could see it in her eyes and her manners that she was terrified of him. When Junmyeon witnessed her father push her, he was in shock and when he basically attacked her, he was furious. He couldn't comprehend why her father hated her so much. Junmyeon never hated Y/N, he liked annoying her though. She kind of got on his nerves as well but he didn't hate her. He never hated a woman enough to want to put his hands on them and it baffled him that her own flesh and blood could do that. It made him recoil in his head when he realized what he'd done to her just a week ago, purposely bumping into her. It was unnecessary. He could've triggered things in her the way he was triggered by his past. Actually, if he was thinking about it hard enough, he was perfectly aware of the fact that there were people out there that came from dysfunctional families. Families with issues, pain, abuse. After all, his own father was planning on killing him. Junmyeon sat Y/N down on his couch and he brought the cat out in her cage. She took her out and sat her on her lap while Junmyeon retrieved the beers from the kitchen. She looked up at him seeing the beers and smiled softly. He sat down next to her and said, "What?" "I didn't think you were serious about the beers." "Oh I never joke about beer." He smiled big at her and opened her bottle then handed it too her. He didn't know if she was a beer drinker or not but when he saw her take that first gulp he could tell that it was hitting her just right. She wanted to forget what happened tonight. She may not be a drinker but she needed the drink. "Slow down a little. I need to catch up" he said. "I have a feeling your temperament is better than mine when under the influence." "Have you ever been drunk before?" He asked. "A few times. Some times weren't as bad as others." She said. She sighed and relaxed deeper into the couch. He watched her hand pet her cat while she drank from her beer with the other. Junmyeon joined in and sat in the silence with her. He wasn't sure what to talk to her about. He doubted she'd want to discuss what just happened at her place. He wanted to kick himself for not noticing that she was afraid earlier. He was upset at himself for not reacting fast enough, the shock just took over his body. Before he knew it, he had finished his beer and when he looked over at her, she'd finished before him. She was touching her face where she was hit, he could tell from the look in her eyes she was reliving it. "I think we're going to need something stronger than beer." He said as he got up. She reached out for him and said, "We didn't eat much, drinking too much could cause a lot of problems." "I'll order out, although, your food tastes way better than take out. I may have to start dropping by during dinner. " She rolled her eyes but she didn't say no. Even though he was just joking, he was tempted to try anyway. After all, they still had a project to work on, maybe they would end up eating together anyway. He shook his head as he grabbed the bottle of apple soju out of the refrigerator and grabbed the shot glasses. He ordered take out from an app on his phone and poured the shots for him and her. She was quick to throw the shot back leaving Junmyeon wide eyed. "You're a better drinker than most girls I know." He laughed. "I've had my practice, believe me." She wiped the side of her mouth with her wrist then pushed the shot glass over to him. Junmyeon looked at her with a cocked eye. He took his shot before he poured her one and then refilled both of their cups. By the time she finished that shot, she was fanning herself. Junmyeon laughed, "You're hot already?" "Hey, alcohol tends to spike up my temperature. You're telling me you're not hot?" He shook his head, "I don't feel it yet." "You will." He laughed as he stood up to go and lower the temperature in the room. Her body temperature would only rise and his would too as he drank. He figured this trick out a long time ago. The more he drank, the hotter he got and the more clothes he'd strip off. He then found himself under a blanket in his room freezing in the morning. It kept him comfortable while he drank, it was the waking up part that was a bitch. The doorbell rang and he answered it to get the food. He watched as she slipped her cat back into the cage and whispered to her, "Be good Lady." She was calmer but she was tipsy he could tell. She started pouring another shot and Junmyeon hurried over to stop her from drinking it. "Hold on you lush. Let's get some food in you first. You know, to absorb that." She chuckled but placed her hand on her face like she was embarrassed. Anguish washed over her face for a second and she started to pick at the containers that held her food. Junmyeon took a moment to get himself settled. He started wondering if bringing alcohol in the mix was a wise decision. She suddenly looked over at him and said, "Why did you help me?" "You can't think I'm that heartless can you? Any decent person would step in." "I didn't know you had one." she smirked. She went ahead and took another shot. The alcohol was getting to her more now than before. He could see a glaze over her eyes like she wasn't really there. She blinked hard, something he recognized in other women he drank with. She had a few shots and a beer, she wasn't a light weight but she didn't seem to have a very high tolerance either. She covered her mouth and burped or hiccuped, maybe both, he wasn't entirely sure. She giggled though and said, "You didn't have to bring me here though. You didn't have to- be nice... So why did you?" She asked. "Well I couldn't just leave you there like that. What's the deal with your father anyway? He's- well he's abusive, why are you putting up with it?" He asked. "Oh that's a boring story. Someone like you wouldn't care to hear it." She said it sarcastically but Junmyeon knew that was really how she felt about him. She relaxed deeper into the couch with her eyes closing; she smiled even though it was clear to him that she was hurting. He regretted ever giving her a hard time. He clearly knew nothing about her and even if she did get on his nerves sometimes, he wasn't okay with seeing her submit to her father like that. She was tough around everyone else, why couldn't she stand up to him? Why wouldn't she? Junmyeon was seven when everything with his family happened. He hated his father now, the rage that grew in him towards that man only built the older he got. He was sure if his father was still alive he would rage against him so much so that he'd kill him almost on sight. Y/N held her own against everyone else though. Why just her father? It was a mystery he didn't want to wait to find out, as long as she was drunk she might be more willing to tell him. "What makes you think I don't want to hear it?" He asked her. Her eyes opened up and she turned her head to look at him. She twisted her lips in an odd fashion and then bit the corner for a second. She then sat up poured herself one more shot and threw it back. Junmyeon looked at her oddly, she really needed another shot to tell the story? How bad was this story? "Hey, I'm not that pathetic, I just don't actually want to remember this evening in the morning." She said. She fixed herself on the couch to face him more and said, "Okay, so my sad little story begins... not so sad actually. My father used to be really gentle with me, he was a good guy. In a lot of ways, he was just a normal papa." "So what changed?" She released a heavy sigh. "My mother did actually." She stopped for a moment, there was a half smile on her face but her eyes did that gaze like she was zoning out. Her mind was still there but she was staring 40 yards ahead of her. She wasn't looking at Junmyeon she was just...staring at space. Or perhaps the memories that were playing in her mind like a movie. He knew how that felt. "When I was ten, my mother walked out on us. We never got a reason why. My dad has bipolar disorder so when she left him, he flew off the handle in a very big way. He wasn't consistent with taking his medications anymore. At some point, I think he just stopped so his moods were always erratic; he would be in a euphoria one moment then a month later he'd be angry or depressed. He threw everything out that belonged to her. He burned the sheets they shared and destroyed the furniture she picked out. He even threw out items she bought me. I loved my papa so much that if he was that angry at my mom then it made sense for me to be that angry at her too. So, I didn't really care that he threw that stuff out. He got rid of almost half my wardrobe though, it took him almost two months to replace the ones he threw away." "When did he become abusive?" Junmyeon asked. She looked up at him like she was hurt he was calling her father's actions abusive. He could also see on her face that she knew she couldn't argue that he was abusive. She said, "Almost immediately...My father loved my mother very much and when she left us without a warning it put him in a bad place. She was his reason for being, she accepted him so when she left him without a reason it destroyed him. I did my best to not need her, to not whine but I missed her. I was angry at her for all the pain she put us through but I really wanted my mother. That was a trigger enough for him to get angry. I cried for my mom and he just went off. He screamed and threw things at me and then he hit me. He came to apologize to me and begged me to keep it a secret. He told me that he couldn't lose me too. Someone would take me away from him and he would die without me." "Y/N that's manipulation and it's dangerous." Junmyeon said concerned. She looked up at him with tears resurfacing and brimming her eyes. She swallowed hard as a tear escaped and ran down her cheek. "I look like my mom," She confessed. "It took me a while to realize that's what he hated about me the most. He didn't want me to be like her. He wanted to remold me. It's so confusing and so fucked up because-" she sniffled and wiped her tears but more ran down to replace them "I lived with someone that loved and hated me at the same time. So when he flew in a rage...even if it wasn't because of something I did, I was the target. I don't know what was worse, when I was the one that screwed up or when it happened for no reason." "I don't understand, why do you keep letting him into your house?" She gave a weak smile. Her eyes looked like a water falland red blush rand from cheek to cheek across the bridge of her nose. "He's my father." She said. That didn't seem like a good enough reason to him but to her it made sense. It was clear she was struggling with her feelings for him as well. She loved him and probably hated him too. Junmyeon wouldn't blame her for hating him. However, he didn't think she should keep allowing herself to be subjected to that kind of abuse. He saw how quickly her father reacted just because she mentioned her mother he couldn't imagine the beatings he gave her years before. He felt sick to his stomach but she chuckled clearly drunk. Her breathing skipped and hitched like a child that had been crying furiously and was told to calm down or face a harsher punishment. Her hands worked to clear he face like it was important for her to not show such a weak side of herself. "Did no one else know about this?" Junmyeon asked. "Minseok did." He shouldn't have been surprised by that but he was. He didn't see Minseok staying quiet while something like that happened to her. He was annoyingly protective of her. Now that he realized that, maybe that's why he was asking him to be kind to her while they worked on their project together. She always seemed like the type of girl with a normal up bringing. She was a good student, she had her friends and she didn't seem to have any problems. When she suggested doing their project on depression he assumed it was because of what Minseok went through, maybe it was or maybe it was also connected to her. When she mentioned PTSD connecting to depression, all he could focus on was his trauma. He never would've suspected that she knew what real trauma was. She was a full grown adult and she was still being abused by her father because her father hated her mother. To Junmyeon, it seemed like he hated her too. When Junmyeon spoke with Y/N's father, he didn't seem like the warm welcoming father he expected her to have. He thought that had more to do with his comments to her when he arrived than it did with her father. As they talked, he asked questions about how well they knew each other and how she behaved in her classes. Her father was using Junmyeon as an informant almost as if he was hoping to catch her in a lie later. He was annoyed with her for getting a B but to Junmyeon that didn't make sense. It seemed like he just wanted a reason to go off. Though her father may actually have bipolar disorder, Junmyeon was sure he was treating Y/N that way of his own sound mind. It wasn't his disorder that made him this wicked towards her it was his own hatred of her mother, the person she looked like, the root of his pain and the one he actually hated, that made him treat her that way. It occurred to Junmyeon that perhaps her father couldn't separate the two of them. When he saw Y/N, it was possible all he was saw his estranged wife despite knowing she was his daughter. The face that kept looking back at him with big sad eyes, almost like an injured puppy belonged to his daughter but triggered his hate for his former wife. It was up to her father to recognize that he was the problem not Y/N. Junmyeon was starting to understand a little bit that Y/N was desperate to have a parent. She loved her father so she convinced herself to make allowances for his behavior. She blamed his disorder and kept up the role as the daughter that did her best to make her father proud. "That's why he doesn't like Minseok," She said. "I guess he always figured he'd tell someone what he was doing and then I'd be taken away." "And then he couldn't beat on you any more." "Myeon." She sighed. "No, Y/N that's not okay don't let it be okay. He may be your father but he knows what he's doing and he's doing it on purpose." Junmyeon came closer to her and cupped her face. He made her look him in the eye, "He knows he has control over you. That's why he's does this. If you keep letting him do this he might kill you, do you understand? " "No, he won't. He wouldn't." "He may not on purpose but he could hit you and you could fall the wrong way and die. No one should be putting their hands on you. No one." "No, he always apologizes," She was starting to slur her words but tears still spilled over from her eyes. Junmyeon felt hurt just having to talk to her about this. She didn't seem to be hearing him, she was too drunk to really let it all sink in. She smiled despite her eyes being closed, she touched Junmyeon's face and said, "He's my dad. He's all I have." He couldn't relate. When his grandparents took him; they were kind and gentle. They worried about him and tried to make sure that he was okay. They loved him and were tender with his emotions. They made sure they did everything they could to help him work through his trauma. He still wasn't really okay but he was better than he was before. He actually wanted to help her. Her body started to go limp and he realized that she fell asleep. He carried her to his room and laid her on the bed. He would try and stay in Minseok's room for the night. He was sure Minseok wouldn't mind, he would be able to keep an eye on him. At least now, he understood his guardian nature towards her. It was a little past midnight when Minseok and Jongin came back in. Junmyeon had to shush them before he explained that she got drunk and fell asleep. Minseok immediately could tell there was more to the story than that but Jongin shrugged it off and mentioned that it seemed like they had fun. He walked off to go get into bed and when Misneok was sure Jongin wasn't in ear shot anymore he asked for the non abridged version. After he explained everything, Minseok shook his head upset. "I wish she'd just let me turn him in." He seethed. "She's very attached to him." "Of course she is, he's her father. She's so scared to get rid of him because if she does then she'll have no one left. He is all the family she has." Minseok said. "What about the run away mother? Do you think they could make it up?" Minseok looked at him like he was crazy. "She hasn't heard a word from her mother since she was ten, after all she's been through, who'd you forgive her?" "No but then again there's lot I would do that she wouldn't." "Of course there is because you two are different people. She's not really a fighter." "She doesn't have grandparents?" "She's never mentioned them. I don't even know if she knows them. I doubt it honestly. This is why I asked you to be careful with her Junmyeon. Things would've gone smoothly if you didn't barge in like that." "Are you kidding me? How the hell did she even get you to keep your mouth shut about all of this? Someone has to wake her up and see that guy for the monser he is." Though Junmyeon was referring to Y/N's father he partly knew his own problems were seeping out. This whole situation was bringing up bad memories for him. They didn't have the same background but they shared pain, a pain that he was sure Minseok couldn't share with her. If he could convince her to stop seeing her father, to keep him out of the house, would she? "She doesn't listen to me. She won't listen to anyone. As long as she does what he says, he'll pay for her college she uses that as justification, if not that she thinks if he apologizes he actually means it." "I talked with him he's got this-- I don't know obsession with her. He needs to have control over her. She's using his mental health as an excuse but that doesn't cut it Minseok, that man is perfectly capable of understanding that what he is doing is wrong." He argued. "Y/N's capable of understanding that too. I'm not condoning what's happening Junmyeon, by no means is this okay-" "Then why aren't you hounding her ass about it?" Junmyeon was utterly frustrated about this situation. His grandparents were his support system. Minseok was the closet thing she had to a support system so why was he just letting her go on like this? Minseok was frustrated himself. A lot of guilt flashed through his face even as he huffed. "I've seen him hit her Junmyeon. I know how bad it is but unless she's willing to speak up about it there's nothing police can or will do." "Okay but as her best friend you should know that you have the power to convince her that she can speak up. You can talk to her and convince her into reporting him. " "I talk to her. All I do is talk to her but she won't listen. I'll try again tomorrow. " Minseok said. Minseok walked down the hallway to his room. Junmyeon took a moment to peer into his too see if she was still asleep. She was out cold. He wanted to try talking to her too. Since they both experienced traumatic events in their past maybe he could help her with the issue. Or at least he could tell her that her father's behavior wasn't worth excusing. There was a simple doubt in his mind, if she didn't even listen to her best friend why would she listen to him? Someone he was sure she wasn't too fond of. He could only try. The next morning came and Y/N walked out of Junmyeon's room looking confused. She covered her mouth as she yawned and then made a face like she could smell her own morning breath. She probably did, Junmyeon resisted his normal urge to tease her about it and walked over to her. "How are you feeling?" He asked "Um...I don't know. How did I fall asleep in your bed?" Junmyeon chuckled. "Don't worry I didn't touch. I laid you down in there and I slept in Minseok's room with him." "Oh," she seemed surprised that he did something so generous. "Thank you." He chuckled, "Well you dont have to seem so surprised by it." "I just didn't expect you to do something so nice. I just hope I didn't get any disease from sleeping in your bed." "Aish you're such a pain in the ass!" She laughed at him. He was being playful when he said it but then he started to wonder if he may have hurt her. He wondered how much his words stung her. He was careless when he spoke with her because he assumed he knew what kind of person she was. She was guilty of being just as careless with him but they were both pretending. They both wanted to be normal, so they could play the role of a typical person despite childhood trauma. Junmyeon cleared his throat, "Listen, about last night," "Oh Junmyeon I don't want to talk about that." "I think it's important that we do." "You don't know what's going on." "Except that you told me what was going on last night. Look, it may be uncomfortable for you to talk about but it's something that really needs to be addressed." "Even if I did tell you, what do you know about what I'm going through. I mean really Junmyeon, you're the one that acts like you have this perfect life and that everything life is gold." "Trust me Y/N, everything that glitters isn't gold. I can understand what you're going through because I my father tried to kill me." She stopped putting up a front and stared at him with wide eyes. The confession didn't just throw her off but she was baffled by exactly what he confessed and he could tell. The police had shown him pity and his grandparents expressed grief, everyone said they couldn't believe someone would do what he did to his own wife and plan what he planned for his own son but in the end, those were the cold hard facts. "I'll tell you my story since you told me yours. That'll make us even, yeah?" He said. She still looked shocked but she nodded yes. Boss Squad: @royalpandajedi @Fromblue2u @Queenpandabunny @marrickej33 @BBxGD @Starbell808 @MelissaGarza @liyahboon Fans: @elishafisher @JaxomB @EXOahjummafan @StefaniTre @Yugykookie97 @dalenalw
Roc Nation Bosses and Jay Park
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