This piece by Lev Novak is too great to ignore. Seriously, if you're a Harry Potter fan who identifies with a certain house in any way, you cannot ignore it. Go read it.
Novak dives into the world of Harry Potter (post-Voldemort, he reminds us) to discuss which house is the best, and why. He hands out some advice to the others on the way, cracks too many jokes, and does it all in just a few paragraphs per house. My personal favorite lines:
Re: Slytherin: "even the coolest, edgiest Slytherins get kind of embarrassing towards the end. I’m looking at you, Malfoy."
Re: Ravenclaw: "Have some butterbeer, guys. Live a little."
Re: Gryffindor: "Harry Potter is a cool-kid jock in the coolest frat."
Re: Hufflepuff: "That’s right. Hufflepuff is America."
Read the whole piece! Seriously.